[ILC10] The Orange Purple Sky
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Henmin
Genre: AU!Romance, Drama
Disclaimer: I don't own any SuJu member.
Beta: paradigm_twist
IL/Pairing Assigner: rssj1314 & shadowcrawler12
[Challenge][Y][FF] Summary: He felt compelled to keep by his promise despite the years that passed. Even as he's pushed away, his resolve keeps him from simply stepping aside.
---
If he hadn't known him for most of his life, he'd think the man had either sprained a muscle, had a bone torn straight out of his body, or that he had something shoved up his anus. Something along those lines.
He didn't think his confession would have such a negative and overblown effect.
He stood a good distance away as he eyed the man before him. Normally, Sungmin would have ran after him and tackled him with a tight hug. He was hesitant now.
Henry turned around briefly. Sungmin knew that he saw him. It tugged at his heartstrings when Henry had spun around and deliberately walked away faster.
Sungmin pursed his lips as he barely looked at the dark blue sky, forcing the corner of his lips to move upward, only for it to fail miserably.
-
Henry leaned against the cement wall, holding out his hand as Sungmin reached inside the bag. The then young teenagers ate in silence beneath that cloud-covered sky.
"I don't think you truly wanted me." Henry said as he bit into a red paste bun.
Sungmin arched an eyebrow, puzzled by his sudden comment.
"You're only being nice." Henry said with a wistful smile as he ate another bite.
Sungmin gave a puzzled look. He wondered how could Henry have possibly thought that. How could he not want him?
He refrained from saying so out loud.
He could have reassured him with his reasons, but doubted that they would convinced him. Reluctant to admit them because he may say more than he intended; more than he wanted to say. All because he was afraid.
If he had told him, Henry might avoid him altogether. The thought alone had terrified him every time and stopped the words from ever leaving his lips for years since that fateful day.
Gradually he gave in, hoping that just maybe, he was being too careful; that his worries were unfounded.
Unfortunately, he was proven wrong.
He sighed at the memory as he waited by the alley, listening to the stifled music inside and avoiding the occasional drunks that passed by.
He glanced expectingly at the door when it burst open, with Henry stumbling out from it. Sungmin waited as Henry shook his head and turned around, recognition slowly dawning on his face.
Sungmin offered a smile in return. He stepped towards him as he took off his dark green jacket, placing it around his shoulders.
"What are you even doing here?" Henry asked bitterly.
"You hadn't come by the apartment. I wanted to check to see if you were alright." Sungmin explained.
"Does a person have so much free time?" Henry asked mockingly as he nearly tripped and fell against the wall.
Sungmin held both arms out protectively but Henry regained his balance. "You don't have to come and find me," Henry stepped away in his drunken state. "You're always doing this. Even when I asked you not to."
"That won't stop me." Sungmin replied.
"Why can't you? You're already preoccupied by your job and school. Finding me shouldn't be a priority. You don't have to feel obligated to take care of me all the time."
"I..." Sungmin lowered his eyes. "I can't help it." He admitted.
Henry scoffed, smirking as he met his eyes. "It's your own fault for liking me."
Sungmin stiffened slightly at his comment. Henry noticed his crestfallen expression and his smirk faltered as he clenched his fist.
"I'm sorry." Henry murmured. "I never meant to-"
"Don't walk on glass around me." Sungmin said calmly, forcing a reassuring smile. "It IS my own fault. And I'm sorry."
Henry pursed his lips, lowering his eyes when he turned away completely; walking away without another word. Sungmin was left to stay behind, his painful smile becoming harder to keep.
He needed to maintain this expression. Even when Henry was away and he was left alone. He had to pretend. Always telling himself that everything was alright; deluding himself into thinking that everything was fine as long as he kept that smile on his lips.
All the while knowing that he was far from it.
-
Sungmin sat quietly on the bench, reading through books as he occasionally looked up. Watching as Henry grinned and gestured exaggeratedly to his friends of the day.
Only Henry could be so confident and smug that the expression nearly begged to be wiped off his face. But Sungmin could never lay a hand on him. At least, not to punish him; but to comfort him when he needed it.
The instinct had started to grow since they were kids. Ever since Henry's parents had passed away because of an accident. Henry had remained stoic when he first heard the news. He kept the same expression even at the funeral, not once shedding a single tear.
Sungmin remembered how the adults were worried over his lack of emotion. But no counselors were ever able to help release them. Sungmin had noticed his habit of pacing around repeatedly, always lost in thought.
It surprised him when one late afternoon, as he sat on the wooden floor of his house, Henry suddenly stood up, sat on his crossed legs and leaned against his shoulders. Sungmin tried to ask what was wrong but the young Henry had said nothing.
He didn't dare move, and watched as Henry eventually fell asleep, stubbornly refusing any adult's offer to take him away.
That instinct had continued on till now, despite everything that had happened between them.
-
"He's been harassing him for a while." Sungmin briefly looked out from the corner of his eyes to Eunhyuk who stood beside him, his hands deep in his pockets as he leaned against the window.
Sungmin watched carefully, eyes following the harsh shove and drop of books onto the floor.
"For how long?"
"For months." Eunhyuk replied. "Henry hasn't said anything about it. But it's painfully obvious."
Sungmin narrowed his eyes when Henry was pushed to the ground, glaring angrily at the man who walked off with a sneer on his wretched face.
He thanked Eunhyuk as he turned away with a determined expression, maintaining a calm facade as he walked away.
-
"Aren't you cold?" Eunhyuk asked, gesturing at his own jacket.
"I don't need it." Sungmin replied as he focused on the passage of his book.
Eunhyuk shook his head as they continued walking side by side. Eunhyuk gave a knowing smile. "You had nothing to do with it right?"
Sungmin flipped a page. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"He hasn't shown up in days. There are even rumors saying that his car's tires were slashed. Has shattered mirrors. AND was impounded." Eunhyuk listed casually, all the while giving a knowing look. "You really take revenge seriously."
Sungmin pretended he didn't hear him as he closed his book, looking up in time to see Henry standing at the distant street corner.
His eyes followed as Henry crossed the street, the wind beating against his faded dark green jacket that was now torn as well.
"If you want to get rid of your feelings as you say, you might want to stop carrying around that expression of yours." Eunhyuk commented lightly.
Sungmin tore his eyes away. "I never said such a thing."
"But you thought it." Eunhyuk stated. "I don't think that'll happen as easily as you would like it to."
Sungmin gave a bitter smile. If he was being honest with himself, he would say that he was never ashamed of his feelings. Not once had he thought they were wrong. It happened naturally as their friendship grew. He didn't fight back once he realized and understood them.
He was beginning to have second thoughts. Ridding himself of those feelings were one of the many solutions but an unlikely one.
He still wasn't ashamed. He just wished Henry would realize that he wouldn't take them back; that it was worthless to act as if nothing happened. As if he didn't exist.
-
Sungmin read the final page of his book and closed it. He placed it inside his bag, sighing as he stared out from the roof of the library, sitting on the cemented floors.
He heard sounds behind him and turned around, surprised to see Henry standing a good distance away.
He scoffed as he turned away. Even now, Henry was still reluctant to be near him.
He heard footsteps and Sungmin turned around once again. He stared as Henry paced around the roof in circles. An odd habit Henry had acquired over the years, but never got rid of.
Sungmin knew what this gesture meant and asked, "What's wrong?"
Henry stayed quiet as he continued to walk around in circles. Sungmin sat there patiently, waiting when Henry broke away from his thoughts and stood before him.
Sungmin uncrossed his legs and shifted slightly instinctively. Henry lowered himself down onto the ground and moved to sit between his legs, his head leaning against his shoulders.
"Is everything alright?" He asked once again. Still no reply. But that didn't deterred the smile that was now playing on his lips.
Sungmin hesitantly placed his hand on his back, giving him the same gentle comforts as he always had when Henry had fell into this odd habit of his. He was glad to see that Henry didn't shove his hand away. Instead, he closed his eyes as he nuzzled against him.
He wasn't sure how long they stayed like that. But by the changing sky color, he knew it had been a while.
Henry slowly opened his eyes, turning his head as Sungmin lowered his hand. He watched Henry's stoic expression and kept an expressionless one.
"I like it best when the sky is like this." Henry said lightly. "This orange and purple sky."
Sungmin followed his gaze as Henry continued. "Everything feels right with the world when it's like this."
He wished he could agree fully, shifting slightly as Henry played with the edge of Sungmin's jacket, the one he still wore.
"You're not a bad person," Henry murmured.
Sungmin furrowed his eyebrows at his comment, straining his ears to make sure he heard correctly.
"Anyone would be lucky to have you confess to them."
"I doubt it... It would be better if those feelings were returned." Sungmin said quietly. "The one-sided aspect of it hurts the most."
"Even if the person was doubtful," Henry continued, ignoring what Sungmin had just said. "Telling himself that he couldn't have been so oblivious after all these years and not be aware of those feelings. That it had to be some joke. That maybe that person doesn't feel them. That maybe he was confused-"
"Never underestimate the person who confessed," Sungmin interjected. "He worked up the courage for months to say it and was coldly rejected by you."
"Don't make this personal now." Henry said casually as he tilted his head up.
"Fine." Sungmin said. He sighed as he looked at the ground. "Then what does this person think now?"
Henry turned his head away. His hands continued to fidget with the jacket.
Minutes passed and the tiny hope glowing in Sungmin was slowly diminishing. If only Henry hadn't started them up so easily.
Henry moved slightly as he straightened up. Sungmin's expression faltered as he withdrew his hands when Henry faced him. He snaked his arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly as he buried himself in the nape of his neck.
Sungmin was caught off-guard by the gesture.
"That person realizes that he really likes his best friend." Henry said; his voice muffled. "That he always liked him. But was still afraid that his best friend never meant it."
Sungmin gave a small smile. "He always meant it."
"Now the person knows." Henry replied. "And would like it if they could be more than that." Sungmin felt his hands tighten around his neck.
"If the person still wants it that is." Henry added quietly.
Sungmin chuckled softly as he allowed himself to be held, wrapping his arms around his body his hands as he closed his eyes.
"Of course I want it."
"I said don't make this personal." Henry repeated. Sungmin laughed as he tightened his hold. "You're squashing me-"
"I don't care." Sungmin asserted. "I've been dreaming of this moment most of my life and I won't have it taken away from me."
"Why would you dream about this?" Henry asked casually as he pulled back. "This is nothing worth dreaming of-"
Sungmin kissed him briefly on the lips. He watched in amusement as Henry's eyes widened and his cheeks darkening. Henry buried himself in his arms from embarrassment as Sungmin laughed.
"No one wants me."
The two children stood in the corner of the darkened bedroom, the taller of the two pulled the tearful child towards him, lifting his hands away from his tear-stricken face.
"What's wrong?" He asked.
Henry hiccuped his words. "N-no one w-wants me."
"I want you!" Sungmin declared, giving a bright smile as he wiped away his tears.
"No you don't!" Henry yelled stubbornly, flailing his small arms. "E-everyone says I'm a problem. That they d-don't want to take care of me. T-they don't want me."
"I do." Sungmin reassured soothingly as he pulled him into an embrace, gently massaging his back to soothe the trembling child.
"I'll always protect you. I'll always take care of you." Sungmin said softly as Henry snaked his arms around his shoulders and held him tightly, muffling his cries against the nape of his neck.
He continued to console the distressed Henry as he said the same mantra endlessly.
After that fateful day, he continued to make good on his childhood vows. Keeping to the promise that Henry had long forgotten.
"I'll always -
"-want you." Sungmin declared in his lowered voice as Henry pulled away. He traced his cheeks gently that had gradually slimmed down as he matured into a young adult.
Henry rested his forehead against his. Sungmin thought he had seen a hint of a chaste and childlike smile tracing his lips. He couldn't suppress his own smile as he encircled his arms around his waist, keeping him still as the breeze ruffled against the faded jacket.
"Always."
☆ rssj1314 's Henmin ☆
- ILC09 [ Kyumin] ☆ ILC11 [ Henwook] -
-A/N: Realizing that is my first posted henmin, the other story I wrote is still in my storage atm ^^;; The vids of them are so cute though ><
Cross posted at henmin and my_prection ^^
Pairing: Henmin
Genre: AU!Romance, Drama
Disclaimer: I don't own any SuJu member.
Beta: paradigm_twist
IL/Pairing Assigner: rssj1314 & shadowcrawler12
[Challenge][Y][FF] Summary: He felt compelled to keep by his promise despite the years that passed. Even as he's pushed away, his resolve keeps him from simply stepping aside.
---
If he hadn't known him for most of his life, he'd think the man had either sprained a muscle, had a bone torn straight out of his body, or that he had something shoved up his anus. Something along those lines.
He didn't think his confession would have such a negative and overblown effect.
He stood a good distance away as he eyed the man before him. Normally, Sungmin would have ran after him and tackled him with a tight hug. He was hesitant now.
Henry turned around briefly. Sungmin knew that he saw him. It tugged at his heartstrings when Henry had spun around and deliberately walked away faster.
Sungmin pursed his lips as he barely looked at the dark blue sky, forcing the corner of his lips to move upward, only for it to fail miserably.
-
Henry leaned against the cement wall, holding out his hand as Sungmin reached inside the bag. The then young teenagers ate in silence beneath that cloud-covered sky.
"I don't think you truly wanted me." Henry said as he bit into a red paste bun.
Sungmin arched an eyebrow, puzzled by his sudden comment.
"You're only being nice." Henry said with a wistful smile as he ate another bite.
Sungmin gave a puzzled look. He wondered how could Henry have possibly thought that. How could he not want him?
He refrained from saying so out loud.
He could have reassured him with his reasons, but doubted that they would convinced him. Reluctant to admit them because he may say more than he intended; more than he wanted to say. All because he was afraid.
If he had told him, Henry might avoid him altogether. The thought alone had terrified him every time and stopped the words from ever leaving his lips for years since that fateful day.
Gradually he gave in, hoping that just maybe, he was being too careful; that his worries were unfounded.
Unfortunately, he was proven wrong.
He sighed at the memory as he waited by the alley, listening to the stifled music inside and avoiding the occasional drunks that passed by.
He glanced expectingly at the door when it burst open, with Henry stumbling out from it. Sungmin waited as Henry shook his head and turned around, recognition slowly dawning on his face.
Sungmin offered a smile in return. He stepped towards him as he took off his dark green jacket, placing it around his shoulders.
"What are you even doing here?" Henry asked bitterly.
"You hadn't come by the apartment. I wanted to check to see if you were alright." Sungmin explained.
"Does a person have so much free time?" Henry asked mockingly as he nearly tripped and fell against the wall.
Sungmin held both arms out protectively but Henry regained his balance. "You don't have to come and find me," Henry stepped away in his drunken state. "You're always doing this. Even when I asked you not to."
"That won't stop me." Sungmin replied.
"Why can't you? You're already preoccupied by your job and school. Finding me shouldn't be a priority. You don't have to feel obligated to take care of me all the time."
"I..." Sungmin lowered his eyes. "I can't help it." He admitted.
Henry scoffed, smirking as he met his eyes. "It's your own fault for liking me."
Sungmin stiffened slightly at his comment. Henry noticed his crestfallen expression and his smirk faltered as he clenched his fist.
"I'm sorry." Henry murmured. "I never meant to-"
"Don't walk on glass around me." Sungmin said calmly, forcing a reassuring smile. "It IS my own fault. And I'm sorry."
Henry pursed his lips, lowering his eyes when he turned away completely; walking away without another word. Sungmin was left to stay behind, his painful smile becoming harder to keep.
He needed to maintain this expression. Even when Henry was away and he was left alone. He had to pretend. Always telling himself that everything was alright; deluding himself into thinking that everything was fine as long as he kept that smile on his lips.
All the while knowing that he was far from it.
-
Sungmin sat quietly on the bench, reading through books as he occasionally looked up. Watching as Henry grinned and gestured exaggeratedly to his friends of the day.
Only Henry could be so confident and smug that the expression nearly begged to be wiped off his face. But Sungmin could never lay a hand on him. At least, not to punish him; but to comfort him when he needed it.
The instinct had started to grow since they were kids. Ever since Henry's parents had passed away because of an accident. Henry had remained stoic when he first heard the news. He kept the same expression even at the funeral, not once shedding a single tear.
Sungmin remembered how the adults were worried over his lack of emotion. But no counselors were ever able to help release them. Sungmin had noticed his habit of pacing around repeatedly, always lost in thought.
It surprised him when one late afternoon, as he sat on the wooden floor of his house, Henry suddenly stood up, sat on his crossed legs and leaned against his shoulders. Sungmin tried to ask what was wrong but the young Henry had said nothing.
He didn't dare move, and watched as Henry eventually fell asleep, stubbornly refusing any adult's offer to take him away.
That instinct had continued on till now, despite everything that had happened between them.
-
"He's been harassing him for a while." Sungmin briefly looked out from the corner of his eyes to Eunhyuk who stood beside him, his hands deep in his pockets as he leaned against the window.
Sungmin watched carefully, eyes following the harsh shove and drop of books onto the floor.
"For how long?"
"For months." Eunhyuk replied. "Henry hasn't said anything about it. But it's painfully obvious."
Sungmin narrowed his eyes when Henry was pushed to the ground, glaring angrily at the man who walked off with a sneer on his wretched face.
He thanked Eunhyuk as he turned away with a determined expression, maintaining a calm facade as he walked away.
-
"Aren't you cold?" Eunhyuk asked, gesturing at his own jacket.
"I don't need it." Sungmin replied as he focused on the passage of his book.
Eunhyuk shook his head as they continued walking side by side. Eunhyuk gave a knowing smile. "You had nothing to do with it right?"
Sungmin flipped a page. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"He hasn't shown up in days. There are even rumors saying that his car's tires were slashed. Has shattered mirrors. AND was impounded." Eunhyuk listed casually, all the while giving a knowing look. "You really take revenge seriously."
Sungmin pretended he didn't hear him as he closed his book, looking up in time to see Henry standing at the distant street corner.
His eyes followed as Henry crossed the street, the wind beating against his faded dark green jacket that was now torn as well.
"If you want to get rid of your feelings as you say, you might want to stop carrying around that expression of yours." Eunhyuk commented lightly.
Sungmin tore his eyes away. "I never said such a thing."
"But you thought it." Eunhyuk stated. "I don't think that'll happen as easily as you would like it to."
Sungmin gave a bitter smile. If he was being honest with himself, he would say that he was never ashamed of his feelings. Not once had he thought they were wrong. It happened naturally as their friendship grew. He didn't fight back once he realized and understood them.
He was beginning to have second thoughts. Ridding himself of those feelings were one of the many solutions but an unlikely one.
He still wasn't ashamed. He just wished Henry would realize that he wouldn't take them back; that it was worthless to act as if nothing happened. As if he didn't exist.
-
Sungmin read the final page of his book and closed it. He placed it inside his bag, sighing as he stared out from the roof of the library, sitting on the cemented floors.
He heard sounds behind him and turned around, surprised to see Henry standing a good distance away.
He scoffed as he turned away. Even now, Henry was still reluctant to be near him.
He heard footsteps and Sungmin turned around once again. He stared as Henry paced around the roof in circles. An odd habit Henry had acquired over the years, but never got rid of.
Sungmin knew what this gesture meant and asked, "What's wrong?"
Henry stayed quiet as he continued to walk around in circles. Sungmin sat there patiently, waiting when Henry broke away from his thoughts and stood before him.
Sungmin uncrossed his legs and shifted slightly instinctively. Henry lowered himself down onto the ground and moved to sit between his legs, his head leaning against his shoulders.
"Is everything alright?" He asked once again. Still no reply. But that didn't deterred the smile that was now playing on his lips.
Sungmin hesitantly placed his hand on his back, giving him the same gentle comforts as he always had when Henry had fell into this odd habit of his. He was glad to see that Henry didn't shove his hand away. Instead, he closed his eyes as he nuzzled against him.
He wasn't sure how long they stayed like that. But by the changing sky color, he knew it had been a while.
Henry slowly opened his eyes, turning his head as Sungmin lowered his hand. He watched Henry's stoic expression and kept an expressionless one.
"I like it best when the sky is like this." Henry said lightly. "This orange and purple sky."
Sungmin followed his gaze as Henry continued. "Everything feels right with the world when it's like this."
He wished he could agree fully, shifting slightly as Henry played with the edge of Sungmin's jacket, the one he still wore.
"You're not a bad person," Henry murmured.
Sungmin furrowed his eyebrows at his comment, straining his ears to make sure he heard correctly.
"Anyone would be lucky to have you confess to them."
"I doubt it... It would be better if those feelings were returned." Sungmin said quietly. "The one-sided aspect of it hurts the most."
"Even if the person was doubtful," Henry continued, ignoring what Sungmin had just said. "Telling himself that he couldn't have been so oblivious after all these years and not be aware of those feelings. That it had to be some joke. That maybe that person doesn't feel them. That maybe he was confused-"
"Never underestimate the person who confessed," Sungmin interjected. "He worked up the courage for months to say it and was coldly rejected by you."
"Don't make this personal now." Henry said casually as he tilted his head up.
"Fine." Sungmin said. He sighed as he looked at the ground. "Then what does this person think now?"
Henry turned his head away. His hands continued to fidget with the jacket.
Minutes passed and the tiny hope glowing in Sungmin was slowly diminishing. If only Henry hadn't started them up so easily.
Henry moved slightly as he straightened up. Sungmin's expression faltered as he withdrew his hands when Henry faced him. He snaked his arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly as he buried himself in the nape of his neck.
Sungmin was caught off-guard by the gesture.
"That person realizes that he really likes his best friend." Henry said; his voice muffled. "That he always liked him. But was still afraid that his best friend never meant it."
Sungmin gave a small smile. "He always meant it."
"Now the person knows." Henry replied. "And would like it if they could be more than that." Sungmin felt his hands tighten around his neck.
"If the person still wants it that is." Henry added quietly.
Sungmin chuckled softly as he allowed himself to be held, wrapping his arms around his body his hands as he closed his eyes.
"Of course I want it."
"I said don't make this personal." Henry repeated. Sungmin laughed as he tightened his hold. "You're squashing me-"
"I don't care." Sungmin asserted. "I've been dreaming of this moment most of my life and I won't have it taken away from me."
"Why would you dream about this?" Henry asked casually as he pulled back. "This is nothing worth dreaming of-"
Sungmin kissed him briefly on the lips. He watched in amusement as Henry's eyes widened and his cheeks darkening. Henry buried himself in his arms from embarrassment as Sungmin laughed.
"No one wants me."
The two children stood in the corner of the darkened bedroom, the taller of the two pulled the tearful child towards him, lifting his hands away from his tear-stricken face.
"What's wrong?" He asked.
Henry hiccuped his words. "N-no one w-wants me."
"I want you!" Sungmin declared, giving a bright smile as he wiped away his tears.
"No you don't!" Henry yelled stubbornly, flailing his small arms. "E-everyone says I'm a problem. That they d-don't want to take care of me. T-they don't want me."
"I do." Sungmin reassured soothingly as he pulled him into an embrace, gently massaging his back to soothe the trembling child.
"I'll always protect you. I'll always take care of you." Sungmin said softly as Henry snaked his arms around his shoulders and held him tightly, muffling his cries against the nape of his neck.
He continued to console the distressed Henry as he said the same mantra endlessly.
After that fateful day, he continued to make good on his childhood vows. Keeping to the promise that Henry had long forgotten.
"I'll always -
"-want you." Sungmin declared in his lowered voice as Henry pulled away. He traced his cheeks gently that had gradually slimmed down as he matured into a young adult.
Henry rested his forehead against his. Sungmin thought he had seen a hint of a chaste and childlike smile tracing his lips. He couldn't suppress his own smile as he encircled his arms around his waist, keeping him still as the breeze ruffled against the faded jacket.
"Always."
☆ rssj1314 's Henmin ☆
- ILC09 [ Kyumin] ☆ ILC11 [ Henwook] -
-A/N: Realizing that is my first posted henmin, the other story I wrote is still in my storage atm ^^;; The vids of them are so cute though ><
Cross posted at henmin and my_prection ^^