the second

[not_a_retard]

Fact: Sleeping in hallways is not as comfortable as it looks.

What's a guy gotta do to get a room around here?

Comments

[materdei]

[not_a_retard]

What? So shocked when you realized that this isn't my fault that you don't have words to express it?

[materdei]

You mean that you're nothing more than a filthy piece of shit? No.

[not_a_retard]

I never knew you paid that much attention. I'm touched, precious. Really.

[wicked_jenkins]

Weeell you could always just, you know, open a door and make yourself at home~ but what do I know, maybe a hallway is your natural habitat.

[not_a_retard]

Yeah, the hallway's really what I'm used to. Complete with the newspaper blanket and donation cup.

[wicked_jenkins]

We could always upgrade you to a proper moth eaten blanket instead.

[not_a_retard]

Yeah, really? Let me find my shopping cart, first. I'll meet you on the corner of 404 Street and Outta Luck Ave.

[wont_lose]

You just pick one, obviously! So long as it isn't occupied there won't be a problem~

[not_a_retard]

And no one sees anything weird about that?

[wont_lose]

Maybe at first, but most people just get used to it. For all the tribulations this place puts us through, the mansion is really quite accommodating most of the time.

[not_a_retard]

Shit happens here, huh? I guess I'll take a look, then.

[safety_on]

Unless you're into the hobo scene just pick one. Am I going to fast for you, or did you catch that?

[not_a_retard]

Great, so third time's a charm. Guess I'll just walk into a place like I own it like the rest of you.

[safety_on]

I think when you're forced into an unfamiliar situation a disregard for manners is kind of acceptable. But what the hell do I know?

[not_a_retard]

No, I'm just saying the last time I tried to make myself at home in a strange place, I woke up a week later in Vegas next to a goat with a bottle of champaign.

[gimmesmokes]

You can crash with me and the dog for a bit, if you want.

[not_a_retard]

The what?

[gimmesmokes]

Haine, just a nickname I give him.

[not_a_retard]

Oh.

Guess it's better than sleeping where that bitch can find me.