Why do I bother being upset with him...it really isn't worth the time and effort I put into it. He is clueless and thinks only of himself, it's my responsibility to remind him of things and if it doesn't work out the way he wants it to then it's ok for him to bitch and complain and pout but if I'm upset about something I should get over it and move ( Read more... )

So in the neverending saga of my issues, here I find myself again at a crossroads wondering what I should do and what would be healthiest for me to do. I know that I feel guilty for the things that I have done/am still doing, but yet I haven't really changed. I have changed the frequency of the interactions - less now than ever before but haven't ( Read more... )

I used to write all the time, I have tons of half filled journals as proof to this. But in the past couple of years I've not been writing as much and I'm not sure why. lately though I have found mysolf writing more, just lots of random thoughts, letters to people that I never intend to send but that make me feel better to write the feelings down, ( Read more... )

So John is in Wisconsin for work, and I'm realizing that although with me working at Starbucks we don't spend all that much time together, I really do cherish the times I do get to spend with him. I miss him lots, it that girly way that I have. And it doesn't help any that in the last couple of weeks my mood has swung into a down one again, one ( Read more... )

So I'm trolling around on myspace music and I found the Sugarland song "You just might make me believe" and I was listening to it. It makes me think of me and John, about how he is always telling me that he loves me and that I can do anything and that he is behind me. I have never had very good self esteem, but he is helping and letting me rely ( Read more... )

So now I'm really pretty excited to start my new job...espically after Friday's debacal with Ralph and all...only one week from today!! It will be good to have stuff to do most all the time and to only have to deal with Cheryl's bad attitude insted of everyone's. And I'll be able to go to work with John everyday and see him at work when I'm feeling ( Read more... )

So today at the meeting Patty told everyone that I am leaving. And they were all sad, which made me feel weird. I know that everyone at STL was sad when I left, but this is different. I want them to miss me, but I want them to be happy for me too...weird, I know. And there is a part of me that doesn't want to leave, even though I know it's for the ( Read more... )

Well, new old job in a way. I'm going back to work for STL, but not as the receptionist and not on the Theatrical side...I'll be working on C&E, doing Shirley's old job, which aparently is Admin Asst/Office Mgr for that office. A lot more responsibility now and being lots busier than I have been here. And I know there will be those that will think ( Read more... )

So today we are going to sign the lease and get the keys to the house. And I'm very excited about this, but also a bit nervous. This is a major deal to me, moving in with someone and committing to that for at least a year...a little scary. And as always I'm nervous about money, that we will have enough to afford all the bills and such beyond the ( Read more... )

I'm feeling lately like I really could use a few more hours in my day. Either that or the ability to not have to sleep, either one would be terrific. I thought I was caught in Starbuck's evil web before, now I really am...I work late at night(or early in the morning depending on how you look at it)and then have to be up early to be here at the ( Read more... )