Fic: Grandparents (2/2)
Title: Grandparents (2/2)
Author: starrdust411
Fandom: Heroes
Pairing: Mohinder/Gabriel
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The hardest thing about being a parent is dealing with the grandparents. (Word Count: 4,115)
Disclaimer: I do not own Heroes.
Warnings: Drama, Slash, Mpreg, AU
Previous
Nana Virgina
"My mother just called."
Those were four words that he hadn't spoken in quite some time -- months if not a full year -- and even mere minutes after hanging up the phone he was still having a hard time believing that the conversation had actually taken place. Gabriel frowned, looking down at his cell phone suspiciously, as if it had just lied to him.
Mohinder gave a loud snort, not bothering to turn and look at him. Not that Gabriel cared since Mohinder's attention was currently focused on Manisha. Nothing made him happier than watching Mohinder with their daughter, especially during bath time. It was quite an adorable scene; Mohinder with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, bent over the kitchen sink, monitoring Manisha's every move. Manisha would occasionally kick and squirm, but mostly she would just lay back and watch the wash cloth dance in front of her wide eyes.
Little Manisha had changed so much in the months since they had brought her home. She was several inches bigger and several pounds heavier. More hair had sprouted on top of her head, growing into soft, adorable little curls and her eyes were so wide and alert, always taking in everything around her. Gabriel loved seeing her grow bigger and stronger, but his heart ached at how quickly time already seemed to be slipping away from them.
"Haven't heard from her in a while," Mohinder muttered tersely. He filled a small bowl with lukewarm water and poured it over Manisha's head, smoothing out her black curls and erasing the bubbles of soap that clung to her. "What did she want?"
Gabriel frowned. He didn't like that tone, didn't like the fact that Mohinder most likely hated his mother. Even after all they'd been through, Gabriel couldn't find it in himself to completely hate the woman. She had raised him after all, done the best that she could on her own with her meager salary even after his father had walked out on them. Yet he understood Mohinder's feelings, because the only history the Indian had with Virginia Gray was one filled with barely veiled hostility and tension. Mohinder would have to have the patience of a saint not to hate her.
"She wants to meet her granddaughter."
He watched as Mohinder's frame stiffened, his hand pausing midway from grasping a knob and turning the water on. Mohinder turned towards him, an irritated look on his face. "She wants to meet her?" he repeated. "Now? After all this time? After all these months? What makes her think she has the right-"
"Mohinder, she's her grandmother," he cut in wearily. He didn't want to have this argument. He didn't want to have to fight with Mohinder, continue to pick sides between him and his mother. It was stressful and completely unfair.
"Since when?" Mohinder huffed as he turned his attention back to the sink. He turned the water back on and filled up the bowl again. "She completely turned her back on you, didn't even show up for your wedding, and hasn't responded to any of your letters or phone calls until now! How did she even find out about the baby?"
"I told her," he confessed.
Gabriel watched as Mohinder's shoulders hunched in annoyance before a long sigh escaped him. "Gabriel," he chided.
"She's my mom, Mohinder," Gabriel said, his voice surprisingly weak even as he spoke. "I know you've given up on her and... and yeah, maybe she has abandoned me, but... but I just can't give up on her. I can't abandon my mom." He stopped, sighed, before running a suddenly trembling hand over his neatly combed hair. "I want Manisha to know her and get to know both sides of her family. That's why I invited her over this Sunday."
Mohinder frowned bitterly as he grabbed a soft pink bath towel to wrap Manisha in. "You invited her over without even discussing it with me?" he snipped as he gently patted the baby dry.
"I'm discussing it with you now," he pointed out.
He sighed, cradling Manisha against his side before looking up at Gabriel with sympathy shining in his eyes. "I'm not a monster Gabriel," Mohinder told him gently. "I don't want you to cut yourself off from your family, but your mother's hurt you so many times. I've been there every single time and I've seen how her absence ate at you."
Gabriel sighed, wrapping his arms around Mohinder and bringing both him and Manisha closer to his side. "I love you, Mohinder," he told him, pressing a kiss against Mohinder's lips. "And you take such good care of me, but-"
"But you need your mother," Mohinder finished knowingly. He sighed, resting his head against Gabriel's shoulder. "I understand. You can have her over, let her meet Manisha, but I don't think I can be in the same room as that woman ever again."
Gabriel nodded as Manisha squirmed in their arms, reaching out to grab at his glasses as she often did. "I understand," he whispered, grasping the baby's hand gently in his own. "I won't force you to do anything you won't be comfortable with."
-+-+-+-
Sunday afternoon came quickly for Gabriel. He spent the majority of the night prior with his stomach twisting and turning itself into painful knots. He hadn't eaten so much as a bite of his breakfast and his hands had been trembling so badly that he had barely been able to brush his teeth.
"Ta dah! Here she is looking absolutely adorable!" Mohinder announced triumphantly as he walked into their bedroom carrying Manisha in his arms. The grin on the Indian's face was impossibly wide as he fingered the hem of her rose pink dress with its lotus prints. "Doesn't she look positively doll like?"
Gabriel laughed. Mohinder's playful energy was helping to ease his tense mood. "She always looks beautiful," he said. Manisha was easily the prettiest baby he'd ever seen, a trait that she -- thankfully -- had gotten from Mohinder, but he couldn't help frowning at the outfit that Mohinder had picked out. "But pink? My mother likes white."
"But Manisha looks so good in pink," Mohinder cooed, as he used his thumb to rub at an imaginary spot on Manisha's soft brown cheek. "And I know firsthand how much your mother loves white things. That's why I'm sure she'll be greatly disappointed by the color of our baby."
"Mohinder!" Gabriel felt his face turn several shades of red at his husband's comment. That wasn't something he needed to hear at the moment, especially since it was a concern that already had Gabriel reeling.
"What are you planning on telling her?" Mohinder asked, changing the subject at the sight of Gabriel's obvious discomfort. "About Manisha, that is. You can't possibly tell her the truth."
That was yet another thing that had been troubling him all this time. He couldn't tell his mother what had really happened. She was a simple woman and stories about genetics, evolution, and men getting pregnant would surely upset her. "I don't know," he admitted. "I could tell her she's adopted I guess."
"That won't work," Mohinder sighed. "She looks too much like you."
Gabriel frowned at Mohinder's words. "She doesn't look like me. She looks like you."
"No, she's looks like you, too," Mohinder argued gently as he adjusted the baby in his arms. He gently held Manisha's face in his hands. "You see, she has your eyes and a bit of your chin." He carefully tipped her head to the side. "And your ears see?"
Gabriel didn't see it, he didn't want to see it. When he looked at Manisha, he saw Mohinder and he loved that about her. "Well, I guess that means adoption is out of the question then," he grumbled. "Unless you think my mother will believe that any resemblance is just an incredible coincidence."
"You could always say we had a surrogate," Mohinder shrugged. "People do it all the time after all. Tell her that we mixed the sperm samples so that we don't know whose baby Manisha is."
"But... well..." Gabriel blushed as he fumbled over the words that he suddenly found too awkward to say.
Mohinder smiled in understanding as he gave Gabriel's shoulder a gentle pat. "You could always say that it was an Indian surrogate."
Gabriel smiled. "You're so smart."
"Of course, I am," Mohinder teased. He leaned forward to kiss Gabriel's cheek before handing over the baby. "Your mother will probably be here soon, so I'd better get going."
"Oh, uh... where are you going?" Gabriel stammered. Suddenly the idea of Mohinder's absence made him feel a bit jittery, even though he should have been prepared for it by now. He never felt as strong and confident without Mohinder by his side.
"I don't know. I'm probably just going to go for a walk and then drop by the store and pick up a few things." Mohinder grabbed Gabriel's arm and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry, I won't be gone too long and I'll have my phone with me if you need anything."
Gabriel sighed, the knots in his stomach suddenly feeling impossibly tight. Manisha reached out and grabbed the frames of his glasses, yanking them off of his face and holding them tightly in her curious hands. "Well," he began, gently prying the frames from her, "since you're going to the store, can you get some pie?"
Mohinder laughed as he leaned in to give Gabriel a kiss. "Of course I will."
-+-+-+-
The knock on the door came just as Gabriel had finished tying Manisha's shoelaces for the fifth time. "That's your Nana Virginia," he told her, brushing a few stray curls out of her eyes and fixing the little flower clipped to her hair. "Now don't be nervous, because she's going to love you just like everyone else." Another knock came and Gabriel frowned as he reconsidered his own words. "And, well, even if she doesn't, we still love you no matter what."
By the third knock, Gabriel was practically shaking as he grabbed Manisha and carried her towards the door. "Don't be nervous," he whispered to her as he gave her stomach a gentle pat. He paused, thinking better of the action. It probably would be too much of a shock if he greeted his mother with the baby in his arms.
Gabriel turned around and placed Manisha in her bassinet. She looked up at him with curious brown eyes, a soft coo escaping her parted lips as if asking him a question. He frowned, his stomach going cold with nerves as he crouched down in front of the bassinet. "Tell me you'll love me no matter what."
Manisha looked up at him again, blinking her wide, dark eyes before letting out another soft coo.
He smiled, feeling infinitely better. "Thanks."
At the fourth knock, Gabriel realized that he had taken far too long to answer. He straightened up and took in several long, deep breaths to calm his nerves. It didn't help. He merely swallowed against the dryness in his mouth before finally heading towards the door. His palms were slick with sweat as he gripped the door knob and twisted it open.
Looking at the woman now, he realized how long it had really been since they had last seen each other. She looked just the same as she had the last time Gabriel had seen her, except now there was a hesitance to her posture and a gleam of distance in her eyes.
"Hi, mom," he breathed. A year ago, he would have hugged her or leaned in to kiss her cheek as she naturally returned the gesture. Now, he merely stood there awkwardly in the threshold, waiting for his mother to... do something.
"Hello Gabriel," she said, flashing him a bland smile before stepping inside. "So where is he?"
Gabriel felt his stomach uncoil and sink at his mother's cold tone. He suddenly wondered if this had been a mistake after all. "He's out," Gabriel said as he eased the door closed behind him. "It's just you and me... and the baby."
A smile tugged at the corner of her lips at the mention of the baby, but his mother quickly smoothed it away as if she were embarrassed by the gesture. "Where is the baby?" she asked.
He had to fight against the urge to frown at the question, or rather the way she had asked it. It was as if she wanted to see the baby and just get away as quickly as possible. He did grimace at that thought, realizing that it probably wasn't too far from the truth.
"In her bassinet," he told her, already walking towards the pink and white playpen. Manisha saw him coming, instantly reaching out her arms to be lifted up before he could even bend down to grab her.
"Oh... is that her?" his mother asked, her voice quiet and startled as she took in the baby's appearance carefully. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was hanging open in a slight "o" and Gabriel prayed that she wouldn't say anything that he wasn't ready to hear. "I wasn't... I didn't expect her to be so-"
"Big?" he cut in, keeping the woman from putting her foot in her mouth. He forced a smile onto his face as he bounced the baby in his arms. "I know. She's only four months old, but she's grown so much."
His mother's features softened at his words, a look of loneliness and longing slowly shining in her eyes. "Is she... adopted?"
Gabriel ducked his head just as Manisha reached out to grab his glasses. "No, not exactly," he told his mother. He turned his head away from her as his cheeks began to flush the way they usually did when he lied to his mother. "We had a surrogate carry for us."
She smiled, taking a few steps closer to him. "Can I hold her?"
He nodded, pleased to know that things seemed to be going much better now. "Of course you can," he smiled. "You're her grandma."
Carefully, Gabriel placed the baby in his mother's eager arms. The woman held Manisha with practiced ease. His mother always had been fond of babies. Whenever there was a baby or toddler within her sight, she would practically melt and beg to hold them. There were times that Gabriel wondered if his mother ever regretted not having more children. Especially now, considering what a disappointment he had become.
"Oh, she's so sweet," his mother cooed, running a boney hand over the baby's soft curls. Manisha merely stared back at her in quiet fascination. "What's her name, dear?"
Gabriel felt his heart swell and his eyes widen in surprise. His mother hadn't called him "dear" since he'd come out to her. "Manisha," he told her confidently. "It's Sanskrit. It means 'wisdom.'"
"Man... Manisha?" she repeated, tripping over the unfamiliar name awkwardly. For a moment Gabriel thought she would make some sort of comment about the foreign name, but she stayed silent. "Manisha," she tried again, a bit more confident this time. "Well you're such a sweetie, Manisha. And so quiet!"
He smiled, motioning her over to the couch where she sat down comfortably. "Yes, she hardly ever makes a sound. Rarely ever cries!" His mother laughed quietly at that comment, her gaze never drifting away from Manisha's face. He sat down beside her. "Was I a quiet baby?"
A strange look flashed over his mother's face at that question, but she quickly smoothed it away as she adjusted Manisha on her lap. "Gabriel, dear? Could you get me a glass of water?"
He frowned at the swift subject change, but ignored it. Things were going well. He shouldn't upset that. "Alright, mom," he said, standing quickly to get his mother a drink.
Gabriel had been feeling quite comfortable and content with the situation as he filled up the glass with ice and water, but by the time he returned to the living room he found his mother in tears.
"Mom?" he gasped, his happy mood crumpling as he hurried back to his mother's side. "Mom, what's wrong?" he asked, placing the cup down on the table.
His mother sobbed, cradling Manisha against her chest. "She looks like you," she cried, tears pouring down her wrinkled face. "She has your eyes! Oh Gabriel, I can't do this. I can't sit here and look at this sweet face and not feel..." His mother's words dissolved into nonsensical sobs and Gabriel couldn't help but feel completely lost.
Gabriel's mind was reeling in confusion. He didn't understand at all what was happening, yet when he moved to take Manisha away his mother's grip only tightened. "Mom... I don't understand. What's wrong?"
"Oh, Gabriel," she sobbed again. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I should have told you years ago."
He frowned, shifting closer to his mother's side. "Told me what?"
A strangled sob escaped his mother's lips as she buried her face in Manisha's soft hair. He felt so sorry for the baby. She looked as lost and confused as he felt. "Gabriel," his mother began, her voice quivering even as she lifted her head to meet his gaze. "I'm... I'm not your mother."
The air seemed to escape his lungs. He felt the world move underneath him as he clung to the couch for dear life. It was a joke, a twisted joke or... or... or what? "What... what are you talking about?"
"I'm not your mother," she said again. Tears were still streaming down her face, but her words were much calmer and clearer now. "You're not my son. I adopted you when you were four."
Gabriel couldn't do more than stare as he took it all in. He couldn't believe what his mother was saying, but at the same time it did make sense. Looking back, he had never seen a single baby picture of himself in their home, had never heard his mother tell embarrassing stories about him when he was less than a toddler. Suddenly the distant feeling he had always felt towards his family made perfect sense.
"I don't understand," he said, even though he did. There wasn't really much for him not to understand. "What... well what about my real father?"
"That horrible man," she said, a sour frown twisting her wrinkled face. "He was your father's... my husband's brother. He sold you to us and we never saw him again." Her frown deepened as she shook her head. "My family... my family didn't approve of it at all, but when I saw your little face, so helpless and small, I knew I had to take you in. I knew that I loved you. And I understand now. I understand how you feel about that man, about Mohinder and Manisha. You loved them. You'd been waiting for them your whole life just like I had been waiting for you."
She moved to touch him, but he pulled away. He couldn't let her touch him. She'd lied to him. His entire life she'd lied to his face and all this time he had been driving himself mad, losing sleep worrying over what she thought of him.
"What about my real mother?" he asked, not caring how those words must sound or how much they would hurt her.
Her gaze softened, the sad, lonely gleam he had seen earlier causing her to look positively frail. "That poor woman," she began, her hand gently running over Manisha's damp hair. Suddenly he didn't like the idea of her holding his baby. "She didn't want to give you away. It was your father's idea. I don't remember much about her, just that she passed away years ago."
Gabriel felt his insides flash hot and then cold as he absorbed everything. He now had two sets of parents; one that abandoned him for pocket change on what he could only assume was a whim and one that had manipulated and damaged him so badly that he couldn't have a single thought without doubting himself. His entire life had been a lie, and for what? He couldn't imagine possibly being anymore miserable with his real family than he had been with the people who had taken him in.
"This was a mistake," Gabriel said, realizing then that it had been a while since he'd said anything. He turned towards his... His hands clenched into tight fists at his side at the sight of her. "I want you to leave."
Her eyes were impossibly wide as she looked up at him, pleading with him to take back what he'd said. "Gabriel," she began, but he wouldn't let her get any further.
"Give me my daughter." Gabriel didn't even wait for her to respond before prying Manisha out of her arms. He clung to her, holding the baby as firmly as he would dare as he pressed his pale cheek against her soft black hair. He instantly felt better, stronger with her in his arms.
"Gabriel please." She moved to touch him, but he stood up and took a step away from the couch. Fresh tears began to fill her eyes, but he wouldn't look at them, wouldn't let her manipulate him anymore. "Gabriel, I know this is all very difficult for you, but you have to understand that I'm still your mother."
"You're not my mother. You took me in when it was convenient for you, tried to mold me to fit your lifestyle, but when I didn't turn out the way you liked you abandoned me. You turned your back on me just when I was starting to figure out who I really was." Manisha's little hand reached out to him, touching his cheek curiously. It was only when he saw the moisture glistening on her fingers that Gabriel realized that he had been crying. "Get out. Please."
He felt her thin hands on his arm, tugging at him desperately, but he wouldn't budge. "I've forgiven you Gabriel, I've accepted you and I can only pray that in time you'll do the same for me."
His frown only deepened. "We're not related. We're not family, so let's not pretend to like each other anymore."
-+-+-+-
The house had been quiet for hours. Ever since Gabriel had laid Manisha down for her midday nap a harsh stillness had spread throughout the house, one that he felt reluctant to disturb as he sat by her crib, watching her sleep. There were so many thing that he should be doing -- laundry, vacuuming, dusting -- but at the moment he couldn't pull himself away from the infant's side.
His throat still felt painfully dry as he sat in the rocking chair, blinking back the moisture in his eyes. His chin had been resting in his hand so long that his palm was starting to feel a bit sore. Yet it wasn't until the sound of the front door creaking open reached his ears that Gabriel actually bothered to stir.
He descended the stairs slowly before finding Mohinder in the kitchen, digging through bags of groceries and putting food items away one by one.
"Oh! You're home," Mohinder greeted, visibly startled to see Gabriel standing beside him when he turned and glanced his way. A small smile spread across Mohinder's lips as he turned back to his task. "It was so quiet in here that I thought for certain no one was home. Here, I got you a peach pie. It was on sale. Isn't that lucky?"
Gabriel blinked slowly as he took the offered plastic container in his hands. He didn't understand why, but as he stared down at the plain label on the clear packaging his eyes began to water.
Mohinder must have noticed his tears, because even as his vision began to blur, Gabriel still saw the smaller man's dark hand reaching out to touch his arm. "Gabriel? Gabriel what's wrong?"
An embarrassingly loud sob escaped his lips as Gabriel tossed the pastry aside and wrapped his arms around Mohinder, pressing the smaller man flat against his body.
"Gabriel, what happened?" Mohinder asked. There was a clear note of panic rising in his voice even as he allowed himself to be held. "Please, talk to me."
"Let's not have any secrets," Gabriel sobbed. "Please, Mohinder, I... I just can't take it anymore."
He wasn't sure if Mohinder understood him or not, but he was content to just stand there and cry as Mohinder wrapped his arms around him.
Author: starrdust411
Fandom: Heroes
Pairing: Mohinder/Gabriel
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The hardest thing about being a parent is dealing with the grandparents. (Word Count: 4,115)
Disclaimer: I do not own Heroes.
Warnings: Drama, Slash, Mpreg, AU
Previous
Nana Virgina
"My mother just called."
Those were four words that he hadn't spoken in quite some time -- months if not a full year -- and even mere minutes after hanging up the phone he was still having a hard time believing that the conversation had actually taken place. Gabriel frowned, looking down at his cell phone suspiciously, as if it had just lied to him.
Mohinder gave a loud snort, not bothering to turn and look at him. Not that Gabriel cared since Mohinder's attention was currently focused on Manisha. Nothing made him happier than watching Mohinder with their daughter, especially during bath time. It was quite an adorable scene; Mohinder with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, bent over the kitchen sink, monitoring Manisha's every move. Manisha would occasionally kick and squirm, but mostly she would just lay back and watch the wash cloth dance in front of her wide eyes.
Little Manisha had changed so much in the months since they had brought her home. She was several inches bigger and several pounds heavier. More hair had sprouted on top of her head, growing into soft, adorable little curls and her eyes were so wide and alert, always taking in everything around her. Gabriel loved seeing her grow bigger and stronger, but his heart ached at how quickly time already seemed to be slipping away from them.
"Haven't heard from her in a while," Mohinder muttered tersely. He filled a small bowl with lukewarm water and poured it over Manisha's head, smoothing out her black curls and erasing the bubbles of soap that clung to her. "What did she want?"
Gabriel frowned. He didn't like that tone, didn't like the fact that Mohinder most likely hated his mother. Even after all they'd been through, Gabriel couldn't find it in himself to completely hate the woman. She had raised him after all, done the best that she could on her own with her meager salary even after his father had walked out on them. Yet he understood Mohinder's feelings, because the only history the Indian had with Virginia Gray was one filled with barely veiled hostility and tension. Mohinder would have to have the patience of a saint not to hate her.
"She wants to meet her granddaughter."
He watched as Mohinder's frame stiffened, his hand pausing midway from grasping a knob and turning the water on. Mohinder turned towards him, an irritated look on his face. "She wants to meet her?" he repeated. "Now? After all this time? After all these months? What makes her think she has the right-"
"Mohinder, she's her grandmother," he cut in wearily. He didn't want to have this argument. He didn't want to have to fight with Mohinder, continue to pick sides between him and his mother. It was stressful and completely unfair.
"Since when?" Mohinder huffed as he turned his attention back to the sink. He turned the water back on and filled up the bowl again. "She completely turned her back on you, didn't even show up for your wedding, and hasn't responded to any of your letters or phone calls until now! How did she even find out about the baby?"
"I told her," he confessed.
Gabriel watched as Mohinder's shoulders hunched in annoyance before a long sigh escaped him. "Gabriel," he chided.
"She's my mom, Mohinder," Gabriel said, his voice surprisingly weak even as he spoke. "I know you've given up on her and... and yeah, maybe she has abandoned me, but... but I just can't give up on her. I can't abandon my mom." He stopped, sighed, before running a suddenly trembling hand over his neatly combed hair. "I want Manisha to know her and get to know both sides of her family. That's why I invited her over this Sunday."
Mohinder frowned bitterly as he grabbed a soft pink bath towel to wrap Manisha in. "You invited her over without even discussing it with me?" he snipped as he gently patted the baby dry.
"I'm discussing it with you now," he pointed out.
He sighed, cradling Manisha against his side before looking up at Gabriel with sympathy shining in his eyes. "I'm not a monster Gabriel," Mohinder told him gently. "I don't want you to cut yourself off from your family, but your mother's hurt you so many times. I've been there every single time and I've seen how her absence ate at you."
Gabriel sighed, wrapping his arms around Mohinder and bringing both him and Manisha closer to his side. "I love you, Mohinder," he told him, pressing a kiss against Mohinder's lips. "And you take such good care of me, but-"
"But you need your mother," Mohinder finished knowingly. He sighed, resting his head against Gabriel's shoulder. "I understand. You can have her over, let her meet Manisha, but I don't think I can be in the same room as that woman ever again."
Gabriel nodded as Manisha squirmed in their arms, reaching out to grab at his glasses as she often did. "I understand," he whispered, grasping the baby's hand gently in his own. "I won't force you to do anything you won't be comfortable with."
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Sunday afternoon came quickly for Gabriel. He spent the majority of the night prior with his stomach twisting and turning itself into painful knots. He hadn't eaten so much as a bite of his breakfast and his hands had been trembling so badly that he had barely been able to brush his teeth.
"Ta dah! Here she is looking absolutely adorable!" Mohinder announced triumphantly as he walked into their bedroom carrying Manisha in his arms. The grin on the Indian's face was impossibly wide as he fingered the hem of her rose pink dress with its lotus prints. "Doesn't she look positively doll like?"
Gabriel laughed. Mohinder's playful energy was helping to ease his tense mood. "She always looks beautiful," he said. Manisha was easily the prettiest baby he'd ever seen, a trait that she -- thankfully -- had gotten from Mohinder, but he couldn't help frowning at the outfit that Mohinder had picked out. "But pink? My mother likes white."
"But Manisha looks so good in pink," Mohinder cooed, as he used his thumb to rub at an imaginary spot on Manisha's soft brown cheek. "And I know firsthand how much your mother loves white things. That's why I'm sure she'll be greatly disappointed by the color of our baby."
"Mohinder!" Gabriel felt his face turn several shades of red at his husband's comment. That wasn't something he needed to hear at the moment, especially since it was a concern that already had Gabriel reeling.
"What are you planning on telling her?" Mohinder asked, changing the subject at the sight of Gabriel's obvious discomfort. "About Manisha, that is. You can't possibly tell her the truth."
That was yet another thing that had been troubling him all this time. He couldn't tell his mother what had really happened. She was a simple woman and stories about genetics, evolution, and men getting pregnant would surely upset her. "I don't know," he admitted. "I could tell her she's adopted I guess."
"That won't work," Mohinder sighed. "She looks too much like you."
Gabriel frowned at Mohinder's words. "She doesn't look like me. She looks like you."
"No, she's looks like you, too," Mohinder argued gently as he adjusted the baby in his arms. He gently held Manisha's face in his hands. "You see, she has your eyes and a bit of your chin." He carefully tipped her head to the side. "And your ears see?"
Gabriel didn't see it, he didn't want to see it. When he looked at Manisha, he saw Mohinder and he loved that about her. "Well, I guess that means adoption is out of the question then," he grumbled. "Unless you think my mother will believe that any resemblance is just an incredible coincidence."
"You could always say we had a surrogate," Mohinder shrugged. "People do it all the time after all. Tell her that we mixed the sperm samples so that we don't know whose baby Manisha is."
"But... well..." Gabriel blushed as he fumbled over the words that he suddenly found too awkward to say.
Mohinder smiled in understanding as he gave Gabriel's shoulder a gentle pat. "You could always say that it was an Indian surrogate."
Gabriel smiled. "You're so smart."
"Of course, I am," Mohinder teased. He leaned forward to kiss Gabriel's cheek before handing over the baby. "Your mother will probably be here soon, so I'd better get going."
"Oh, uh... where are you going?" Gabriel stammered. Suddenly the idea of Mohinder's absence made him feel a bit jittery, even though he should have been prepared for it by now. He never felt as strong and confident without Mohinder by his side.
"I don't know. I'm probably just going to go for a walk and then drop by the store and pick up a few things." Mohinder grabbed Gabriel's arm and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry, I won't be gone too long and I'll have my phone with me if you need anything."
Gabriel sighed, the knots in his stomach suddenly feeling impossibly tight. Manisha reached out and grabbed the frames of his glasses, yanking them off of his face and holding them tightly in her curious hands. "Well," he began, gently prying the frames from her, "since you're going to the store, can you get some pie?"
Mohinder laughed as he leaned in to give Gabriel a kiss. "Of course I will."
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The knock on the door came just as Gabriel had finished tying Manisha's shoelaces for the fifth time. "That's your Nana Virginia," he told her, brushing a few stray curls out of her eyes and fixing the little flower clipped to her hair. "Now don't be nervous, because she's going to love you just like everyone else." Another knock came and Gabriel frowned as he reconsidered his own words. "And, well, even if she doesn't, we still love you no matter what."
By the third knock, Gabriel was practically shaking as he grabbed Manisha and carried her towards the door. "Don't be nervous," he whispered to her as he gave her stomach a gentle pat. He paused, thinking better of the action. It probably would be too much of a shock if he greeted his mother with the baby in his arms.
Gabriel turned around and placed Manisha in her bassinet. She looked up at him with curious brown eyes, a soft coo escaping her parted lips as if asking him a question. He frowned, his stomach going cold with nerves as he crouched down in front of the bassinet. "Tell me you'll love me no matter what."
Manisha looked up at him again, blinking her wide, dark eyes before letting out another soft coo.
He smiled, feeling infinitely better. "Thanks."
At the fourth knock, Gabriel realized that he had taken far too long to answer. He straightened up and took in several long, deep breaths to calm his nerves. It didn't help. He merely swallowed against the dryness in his mouth before finally heading towards the door. His palms were slick with sweat as he gripped the door knob and twisted it open.
Looking at the woman now, he realized how long it had really been since they had last seen each other. She looked just the same as she had the last time Gabriel had seen her, except now there was a hesitance to her posture and a gleam of distance in her eyes.
"Hi, mom," he breathed. A year ago, he would have hugged her or leaned in to kiss her cheek as she naturally returned the gesture. Now, he merely stood there awkwardly in the threshold, waiting for his mother to... do something.
"Hello Gabriel," she said, flashing him a bland smile before stepping inside. "So where is he?"
Gabriel felt his stomach uncoil and sink at his mother's cold tone. He suddenly wondered if this had been a mistake after all. "He's out," Gabriel said as he eased the door closed behind him. "It's just you and me... and the baby."
A smile tugged at the corner of her lips at the mention of the baby, but his mother quickly smoothed it away as if she were embarrassed by the gesture. "Where is the baby?" she asked.
He had to fight against the urge to frown at the question, or rather the way she had asked it. It was as if she wanted to see the baby and just get away as quickly as possible. He did grimace at that thought, realizing that it probably wasn't too far from the truth.
"In her bassinet," he told her, already walking towards the pink and white playpen. Manisha saw him coming, instantly reaching out her arms to be lifted up before he could even bend down to grab her.
"Oh... is that her?" his mother asked, her voice quiet and startled as she took in the baby's appearance carefully. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was hanging open in a slight "o" and Gabriel prayed that she wouldn't say anything that he wasn't ready to hear. "I wasn't... I didn't expect her to be so-"
"Big?" he cut in, keeping the woman from putting her foot in her mouth. He forced a smile onto his face as he bounced the baby in his arms. "I know. She's only four months old, but she's grown so much."
His mother's features softened at his words, a look of loneliness and longing slowly shining in her eyes. "Is she... adopted?"
Gabriel ducked his head just as Manisha reached out to grab his glasses. "No, not exactly," he told his mother. He turned his head away from her as his cheeks began to flush the way they usually did when he lied to his mother. "We had a surrogate carry for us."
She smiled, taking a few steps closer to him. "Can I hold her?"
He nodded, pleased to know that things seemed to be going much better now. "Of course you can," he smiled. "You're her grandma."
Carefully, Gabriel placed the baby in his mother's eager arms. The woman held Manisha with practiced ease. His mother always had been fond of babies. Whenever there was a baby or toddler within her sight, she would practically melt and beg to hold them. There were times that Gabriel wondered if his mother ever regretted not having more children. Especially now, considering what a disappointment he had become.
"Oh, she's so sweet," his mother cooed, running a boney hand over the baby's soft curls. Manisha merely stared back at her in quiet fascination. "What's her name, dear?"
Gabriel felt his heart swell and his eyes widen in surprise. His mother hadn't called him "dear" since he'd come out to her. "Manisha," he told her confidently. "It's Sanskrit. It means 'wisdom.'"
"Man... Manisha?" she repeated, tripping over the unfamiliar name awkwardly. For a moment Gabriel thought she would make some sort of comment about the foreign name, but she stayed silent. "Manisha," she tried again, a bit more confident this time. "Well you're such a sweetie, Manisha. And so quiet!"
He smiled, motioning her over to the couch where she sat down comfortably. "Yes, she hardly ever makes a sound. Rarely ever cries!" His mother laughed quietly at that comment, her gaze never drifting away from Manisha's face. He sat down beside her. "Was I a quiet baby?"
A strange look flashed over his mother's face at that question, but she quickly smoothed it away as she adjusted Manisha on her lap. "Gabriel, dear? Could you get me a glass of water?"
He frowned at the swift subject change, but ignored it. Things were going well. He shouldn't upset that. "Alright, mom," he said, standing quickly to get his mother a drink.
Gabriel had been feeling quite comfortable and content with the situation as he filled up the glass with ice and water, but by the time he returned to the living room he found his mother in tears.
"Mom?" he gasped, his happy mood crumpling as he hurried back to his mother's side. "Mom, what's wrong?" he asked, placing the cup down on the table.
His mother sobbed, cradling Manisha against her chest. "She looks like you," she cried, tears pouring down her wrinkled face. "She has your eyes! Oh Gabriel, I can't do this. I can't sit here and look at this sweet face and not feel..." His mother's words dissolved into nonsensical sobs and Gabriel couldn't help but feel completely lost.
Gabriel's mind was reeling in confusion. He didn't understand at all what was happening, yet when he moved to take Manisha away his mother's grip only tightened. "Mom... I don't understand. What's wrong?"
"Oh, Gabriel," she sobbed again. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I should have told you years ago."
He frowned, shifting closer to his mother's side. "Told me what?"
A strangled sob escaped his mother's lips as she buried her face in Manisha's soft hair. He felt so sorry for the baby. She looked as lost and confused as he felt. "Gabriel," his mother began, her voice quivering even as she lifted her head to meet his gaze. "I'm... I'm not your mother."
The air seemed to escape his lungs. He felt the world move underneath him as he clung to the couch for dear life. It was a joke, a twisted joke or... or... or what? "What... what are you talking about?"
"I'm not your mother," she said again. Tears were still streaming down her face, but her words were much calmer and clearer now. "You're not my son. I adopted you when you were four."
Gabriel couldn't do more than stare as he took it all in. He couldn't believe what his mother was saying, but at the same time it did make sense. Looking back, he had never seen a single baby picture of himself in their home, had never heard his mother tell embarrassing stories about him when he was less than a toddler. Suddenly the distant feeling he had always felt towards his family made perfect sense.
"I don't understand," he said, even though he did. There wasn't really much for him not to understand. "What... well what about my real father?"
"That horrible man," she said, a sour frown twisting her wrinkled face. "He was your father's... my husband's brother. He sold you to us and we never saw him again." Her frown deepened as she shook her head. "My family... my family didn't approve of it at all, but when I saw your little face, so helpless and small, I knew I had to take you in. I knew that I loved you. And I understand now. I understand how you feel about that man, about Mohinder and Manisha. You loved them. You'd been waiting for them your whole life just like I had been waiting for you."
She moved to touch him, but he pulled away. He couldn't let her touch him. She'd lied to him. His entire life she'd lied to his face and all this time he had been driving himself mad, losing sleep worrying over what she thought of him.
"What about my real mother?" he asked, not caring how those words must sound or how much they would hurt her.
Her gaze softened, the sad, lonely gleam he had seen earlier causing her to look positively frail. "That poor woman," she began, her hand gently running over Manisha's damp hair. Suddenly he didn't like the idea of her holding his baby. "She didn't want to give you away. It was your father's idea. I don't remember much about her, just that she passed away years ago."
Gabriel felt his insides flash hot and then cold as he absorbed everything. He now had two sets of parents; one that abandoned him for pocket change on what he could only assume was a whim and one that had manipulated and damaged him so badly that he couldn't have a single thought without doubting himself. His entire life had been a lie, and for what? He couldn't imagine possibly being anymore miserable with his real family than he had been with the people who had taken him in.
"This was a mistake," Gabriel said, realizing then that it had been a while since he'd said anything. He turned towards his... His hands clenched into tight fists at his side at the sight of her. "I want you to leave."
Her eyes were impossibly wide as she looked up at him, pleading with him to take back what he'd said. "Gabriel," she began, but he wouldn't let her get any further.
"Give me my daughter." Gabriel didn't even wait for her to respond before prying Manisha out of her arms. He clung to her, holding the baby as firmly as he would dare as he pressed his pale cheek against her soft black hair. He instantly felt better, stronger with her in his arms.
"Gabriel please." She moved to touch him, but he stood up and took a step away from the couch. Fresh tears began to fill her eyes, but he wouldn't look at them, wouldn't let her manipulate him anymore. "Gabriel, I know this is all very difficult for you, but you have to understand that I'm still your mother."
"You're not my mother. You took me in when it was convenient for you, tried to mold me to fit your lifestyle, but when I didn't turn out the way you liked you abandoned me. You turned your back on me just when I was starting to figure out who I really was." Manisha's little hand reached out to him, touching his cheek curiously. It was only when he saw the moisture glistening on her fingers that Gabriel realized that he had been crying. "Get out. Please."
He felt her thin hands on his arm, tugging at him desperately, but he wouldn't budge. "I've forgiven you Gabriel, I've accepted you and I can only pray that in time you'll do the same for me."
His frown only deepened. "We're not related. We're not family, so let's not pretend to like each other anymore."
-+-+-+-
The house had been quiet for hours. Ever since Gabriel had laid Manisha down for her midday nap a harsh stillness had spread throughout the house, one that he felt reluctant to disturb as he sat by her crib, watching her sleep. There were so many thing that he should be doing -- laundry, vacuuming, dusting -- but at the moment he couldn't pull himself away from the infant's side.
His throat still felt painfully dry as he sat in the rocking chair, blinking back the moisture in his eyes. His chin had been resting in his hand so long that his palm was starting to feel a bit sore. Yet it wasn't until the sound of the front door creaking open reached his ears that Gabriel actually bothered to stir.
He descended the stairs slowly before finding Mohinder in the kitchen, digging through bags of groceries and putting food items away one by one.
"Oh! You're home," Mohinder greeted, visibly startled to see Gabriel standing beside him when he turned and glanced his way. A small smile spread across Mohinder's lips as he turned back to his task. "It was so quiet in here that I thought for certain no one was home. Here, I got you a peach pie. It was on sale. Isn't that lucky?"
Gabriel blinked slowly as he took the offered plastic container in his hands. He didn't understand why, but as he stared down at the plain label on the clear packaging his eyes began to water.
Mohinder must have noticed his tears, because even as his vision began to blur, Gabriel still saw the smaller man's dark hand reaching out to touch his arm. "Gabriel? Gabriel what's wrong?"
An embarrassingly loud sob escaped his lips as Gabriel tossed the pastry aside and wrapped his arms around Mohinder, pressing the smaller man flat against his body.
"Gabriel, what happened?" Mohinder asked. There was a clear note of panic rising in his voice even as he allowed himself to be held. "Please, talk to me."
"Let's not have any secrets," Gabriel sobbed. "Please, Mohinder, I... I just can't take it anymore."
He wasn't sure if Mohinder understood him or not, but he was content to just stand there and cry as Mohinder wrapped his arms around him.