Why?

[mumu1210]

What's changed that I don't talk the way I use to with certain "friends

Comments

[spider_matt]

I know how you feel. I've felt that way on a number of occasions, but you have to take it for what it's worth. I think the truth is that, to a degree, distance does make a difference. It's not that they're no longer your friends or that some truth was revealed about the relationship you had with them; I think it's simply easier to maintain a friendship with those you come in contact with on a day to day basis. People like that contact. People like to go out for coffee or go over to a friend's apartment to talk rather than sit at a computer or talk on the phone. But when you do talk to old friends, do you really think your conversations are much different from what they used to be? Do you think they hide things from you now that you're not there? I doubt it. People are forgetful, but I don't think your relationship with past friends has changed. You'll probably find that when you're back in Arizona, the friendship you had before you left is pretty much the same. Unfortunately, I have found physical distance hampering to the

[mumu1210]

Well, I think in some ways I did see long term potential for certain friendships and now that I think about it, won't last that long. Sure there were some really meaningful conversations and lots of time spent on the friendships, but a lot of times it takes more than time to make a friendship special. A lot of it has to do with maturity level, and sometimes that just isn't there. And of course it's not any of this is either party's fault, it's just weird that what use to be isn't anymore. And I know what you mean about the best friend thing. I'll definitely stay that way with my best friend - there's absolutely no question of that, it's just all my other friends that I'm worried about is all, especially if I don't go back to AZ and visit. I just have the tendency to mourn just about anything and everything. Case in point, I got really sad when this jerk I couldn't stand no longer chased after me and tried to talk to me. Sure I hated it while he was doing it, but it's always nice when people give you that attention. Especially since

[spider_matt]

Haha, I know what you mean. But that's why I think it's important to forget about certain emotional responses long enough to rantionally think through certain scenarios.

[coqui13036]

I LOVE YOU! :-D

[oshkoshasha]

aww mu - realize that the distance isn't actually telling about the friendship specifically - or at least i don't think it is...what i've realized over the past couple of years is that it is especially telling of people and their ability to keep in touch long distance...you'll realize that when you come in dec some friends you have rarely spoken to over the course of the first semester, are able to immediately reconnect w/ you w/o a moment's thought. some people are better at the whole phone/im/email thing than others...i mean, you are right: you are bound to lose some friends over time - but don't write anything off until the end of your first year (or longer). some people are just as overwhelmed as you are socially/academically that they will save their efforts for when they can see you face to face.

hang in there sweetie -- you can do it!! (go asian power!)

[mumu1210]

aww, thanks Ash. It all makes sense, it's just really hard is all :(
I can't wait to see you and hang out over Christmas break though!! Sorry I've sucked at keeping in touch so much (haha, how ironic that here I'm complaining and I'm doing the same thing.) How's soph year been so far? I really wish I went to college in a city because there's just absolutely nothing to do here and the bordeom is killing me.
Anyways, hope you're having fun & ill c u over x-mas! I get back on the 13th i think and im leaving like the 9th.

[pyotrwiggin]

hey we should talk sometime

aim me or sth.

jeez i feel depressed right now