Serpents: Epilouge
Eight hours to Deathly Hallows! Are y'all all rarin' to get your mitts on your books? I'm in Group E at my Barnes and Noble, which means only something like 100 people in front of me in line. As I was waiting to get my ticket this morning (in the blazing Texas heat, wearing jeans, stupidly drinking a hot toffee nut latte I'd bought for caffeine, obviously before I had enough caffeine in me to think straight), my ears perked up when I heard the girls behind me talking about fanfic. I turned and asked what they write. Harry/Draco slashers, the lot of them. They seemed to think it was cute that I ship Remus/Tonks, and said, "If it can't be Remus/Sirius, Remus/Tonks is okay." They were even nice when one of them commented that Snarry slashers were weird and I turned around and said, "Honey, to canon pairing shippers, y'all are all weird." They said they'd see me tonight in Group E, so I think they weren't offended. ;)
Probably none of y'all are even around anymore to read this, but as promised, I've finished Serpents before the release -- though unfortunately not before the metamorfic_moon Last Chance Full Moon Showdown. Still, I won't be too hard on myself; though when I consider that I wrote 66,000 words in a little more than a month, and I've written a chapter of a new novel in a year, I probably should be...
Title: Serpents
Author: MrsTater
Rating & Warnings: R for sexuality
Prompts: weakness; "In the light of Voldemort's return, we are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided."
Word Count: 66,000ish words
Summary: Two years into a relationship with Remus, and the correct way to deal with full moons continues to elude Tonks, dredging up her insecurities and memories of painful past failures. Voldemort's attack on a fellow Order member puts everything into perspective for her...But will Remus see the light?
Author’s Notes: A leap into the future in the Caring For Magical Creatures universe, which I think should stand alone even if you've not read that fic, though the background might make more sense as it's a POA-era R/T romance.
I wish there were words to express how much I appreciate all Godricgal has done throughout the writing of this fic. Your encouragement and support and beta work and most of all your friendship are what made this come to be, and I most want a happy ending for Remus and Tonks in Deathly Hallows so we can keep doing this for a long time to come.
Prologue: Judgment Day | 1. Vicious Cycle | 2. Up From the Grave | 3. Between the Woman and the Serpent | 4. In the Waiting Room | 5. What Was and Is and Is To Come | 6. The Tip Of the Iceberg |
Epilogue: Little Children, Love One Another
"As none of you is unaware..."
Professor Dumbledore, Tonks thought, had probably never addressed the Order of the Phoenix like that before at a meeting where Aberforth and Mundungus Fletcher were present. She wondered if he were thinking the same as his blue eyes behind the half-moon spectacles drifted from face to face around the long kitchen table, before finally settling on her and Kingsley, stood by the staircase, at the ready should they be called to duty for the Ministry.
"...especially not," Dumbledore continued, "those of us who, at this very moment, sacrifice a well-earned hour’s break from investigating the matter...." His gaze moved back to the Order, taking them all in. "...ten of Voldemort's most dangerous Death Eaters -- the very same masked faces some of us have encountered before -- escaped last night from Azkaban."
Despite the news being a day old now, Tonks half-expected at least a few of the Order members -- Hestia and Molly, namely -- to shudder, and perhaps Dedalus Diggle to startle in his chair and lose his violet top hat. They all, however, stared grimly back at Dumbledore, and if any were afraid, either of the name or of the news, they apparently were determined not to show it.
Some were more grim than others: beside her, Kingsley's jaw muscle twitched beneath his smooth brown skin as he gritted his teeth in frustration that while ten real criminals were on the loose, pressure increased on him to track down Sirius Black -- whose eyes were hard and steely. Sirius had his wand to hand, as if he fully expected Dumbledore to send them out to track down the murdering bastards, granting the Order the same powers the Ministry had placed in the hands of the Aurors last time around. Next to Sirius, Remus watched his mate as though he were reading his thoughts and considering disarming him to stop him leaping into the fray.
Tonks quickly looked away, not wanting Remus to catch her watching him, though she didn't think an Expelliarmus on Sirius would be a bad idea. Even if she had begun to understand him better in the past twenty-four hours than she could have imagined relating to a person she'd barely talked to.
Knowing that Bellatrix Lestrange was at large, seeing the wanted posters plastered up all over the Ministry and Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade, had made her more real to Tonks than she ever had been as a faceless aunt her mother kept no photographs of, who was mad and rotting in prison. Rage simmered deep in Tonks' belly to see a resemblance to her mother in that wasted wreck of a face.
Still, she knew that the Death Eaters' madness could only be countered by sanity. However much she'd begun to sympathise with Sirius and feel this battle was personal, she couldn't apply the word sane to him.
Or yourself at the moment, she thought as her eyes darted once more to Remus. Crap time to quarrel with him, the day before all hell breaks loose. How many times did Robards tell you to get your head in the game and stop thinking about being bleeding related to some of the convicts? If he knew you were having bloke trouble again...
"I do not gather you here tonight to formulate a battle strategy," Dumbledore went on, as though he, too, had been reading minds, "for though our opponent has nearly doubled his ranks in one night, the time has not yet come for the Order of the Phoenix to take to the field of battle."
Tonks looked to Sirius again, and saw teeth bared and white knuckles clutching his wand so that it was liable to snap. The look only hardened when Remus caught his eye, and Tonks, though put out as she was by their quarrel, felt an almost magnetic pull to cross the room and stand behind Remus. She might have done, if she had not seen, in her peripheral, Dumbledore's thin, long-fingered hand gesture in her direction.
"Though we should not be without hope," he said with a deferential nod at her and Kingsley, "that we must need encounter these ten again. For there are those trained for just these very circumstances, for the apprehension of Dark Wizards and Witches. They may yet bring them once again to justice before the Death Eaters wreak more of the same harm for which they were first imprisoned."
As the Headmaster spoke, Tonks felt that his was not the only gaze upon her. Glancing at the table, she met Molly's brown eyes, which now revealed her fear, pleading painfully with Tonks to stop those who had killed her brothers last time from bereaving her of her babies now. If Tonks' heart had not already hardened in her chest earlier in the day with the conviction that it was her duty to capture Bellatrix -- though the only thread that tied her to the House of Black was a singed one -- to protect her mother, her father, she was certain it would have done now, to protect these others, who had lately become as dear to her as blood kin.
Mad-Eye, too, watched her; he looked old and somehow nostalgic as he appraised the new generation of Aurors who faced the very same crew he had thrown in Azkaban. Though she did not doubt that nothing would satisfy him so much as personally escorting them back to their temporarily vacated cells, she knew he counted on Kingsley and, dear Merlin, on her, to see finished the work he had started.
Conviction aside, Tonks -- do you really think you're up to it?
Yes. You are more than able.
The answer, the affirmation, did not come from within, but rather was communicated by Remus' eyes as they caught hers. She'd tried not to look at him when she noticed him watching her, but didn't quite manage it to allow her gaze to drift beyond his figure at the table. As his gaze held, she knew that the only way she would be able to look away from him would be if he broke eye contact first.
Of course she couldn't read his expression very well, but her breath caught with the realisation that this time, it was not because that stolid mask he wore hid all, but because he was not wearing it now, and revealed more than she could possibly identify.
His faith was obvious, because she had learnt long ago to believe that he believed in her. Fear mingled with it, which she didn't begrudge him, for if he did not fear for what her chosen path of Dark Wizard Chaser might well bring, he was living in a dream world.
And Remus had made it abundantly clear that he lived nowhere of the sort.
Not to mention the very first time you met him, you remember, he spoke of Aurors Frank and Alice Longbottom as his dear friends -- tortured into insanity by Bellatrix Sodding Lestrange herself.
Tonks also noticed that there was nothing of surprise in his expression, and realised that Remus had known then -- two years ago --- that it was only a matter of time before Voldemort returned and recalled his followers to his service. Nonetheless he had supported her career choice, expressed approval, even -- and had told her later that all along he had her in mind as a recruit when -- not if -- the Order of the Phoenix reconvened. Though he loved her, he had never once tried to protect her from the harsh realities of their world.
Can he learn not to protect you from the harsh reality that lies within himself? If only you could have that hope...It would be enough. You could keep on...
"No," Dumbledore, resumed, and Remus' gaze released Tonks as he returned his attention to their leader. "It is not for soldiering that I gather you here tonight. We gather here, quite simply, to gather."
Dumbledore smiled, and looked at the Order with twinkling eyes. A few smiled back -- Professor Snape was not among them; indeed, he looked as perturbed as Sirius about not being called to battle, that he had been drawn from his dungeon chambers to socialise.
"For it is in this that we differ from the Death Eaters," Dumbledore continued. "They are the servants of Voldemort -- but you are my friends. Their loyalty to one another exceeds no further than each one's grasp, but each of us joined the Order of the Phoenix in order to protect something beyond ourselves. Be it husbands, or wives, or children, or parents, or friends, or simply fellow human beings. We are here because love's eyes look outward."
We bear each other up, Remus had said. Everything he had told her about the Order of the Phoenix echoed in harmonic counterpoint with Dumbledore's speech as she fingered the Rune of Humanity on her charm bracelet.
"But remember," said Dumbeldore, in a tone that held warning. "We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided. Look that you do not let the Death Eaters' weakness become your own."
Tonks' eyes went to Hestia, who she was a little surprised to find looking at her. A bit red in the face, as Tonks had felt her own cheeks flush. At the same moment, they mouthed, I'm sorry.
Glancing across the table, Tonks saw Sirius' eyes downcast. She guessed that he and Remus would be on speaking terms again; but she knew Sirius' fury against Snape would rage all the more bitter.
She looked to Remus beside him, who had been looking at Sirius, but apparently had felt her gaze on him and shifted his to her.
You're on the same page now. Or want to be.
"Headmaster," Kingsley said quietly in the pause, "Tonks and I--"
"Are needed elsewhere," Dumbledore said, again with the deferential nod. "Know that as you go forth, we hold you in our thoughts, and bid you Godspeed."
"Thank you," said Kingsley. "C'mon, Tonks."
But rather than turning to ascend the stairs, Tonks had stepped toward the table, eyes locked on Remus.
Oh no -- don't you dare do what you're thinking of doing. Not in front of the whole Order.
She didn't listen to the inner voice of restraint, but instead stumbled around a waste bin en route to the other side of the table.
The legs of Remus' chair scraped against the floor, and he stood.
He's going to bolt. Or else just brace himself against something he doesn't want to hear.
No! He wants to speak to you! That speech moved him, too!
Tonks took out her wand, glanced at the Order and muttered an apology, then cast a Muffliato.
"I don't want to get married," she blurted. "I mean, I do, someday. Maybe. But I'm not ready yet. We're not ready."
"I'm sorry, Elphine," said Remus. "I wish--"
"But I am a Hufflepuff," she cut him off, and he actually gave a little start, his sandy brows shooting high up on his forehead. "People think we're a lot of duffers, but we're not. We're loyal, and hard-working -- and I'm no less loyal or hard-working than any Hufflepuff."
A smile ghosted Remus' face. "That you are a true Hufflepuff," he said, "I have never had a moment's doubt."
"Liar -- remember that one time you asked if I was a Slytherin?"
Again Remus looked wrong-footed, even took a step back from her. "That was--"
"Stupid," she answered for him, unable to stop herself, or the flood of words that tumbled out after. "But I'd been stupid first, so it all cancels out. The point is -- neither of us is perfect, Remus. We can both be absolute idiots. And we've got a whole crapload of problems between us, but that doesn't mean we ought to turn tail and run. You're a Gryffindor -- you face problems. And I'm a Hufflepuff -- I don't give up till I've solved a problem, even if I fall flat on my face -- which I do often -- and have to try again and again."
She paused to catch her breath, and Remus looked a little breathless, as well, as he stared at her. She felt herself wavering, as she felt dozens of eyes on her back, and imagined them all trying to imagine what the hell the crazy young one was going on about.
But she wasn't the sort to profess herself as a Hufflepuff, through-and-through, and then give up before she'd said her piece.
So she continued, though more tentatively than before: "Maybe you'd rather not keep trying with someone who keeps falling flat on her face," she said, not wanting to think about how she'd perform tonight if he said no, he'd rather not. "If you do...I won't give up on you, Remus. Not ever. Even if those darker days do happen for...for werewolves, like you said."
Remus looked gobsmacked, to be sure. She'd have preferred him to look a little touched. Maybe he was -- but his guard was up again, his eyes fixed just to the right of her face.
You're doing this to him in front of everyone, what do you expect? Work with what you can get.
"Why?" he asked, his voice raw. "Why would you bind yourself to that?"
"Why?" Tonks repeated, her heart constricting painfully, with anger or sadness or both at hearing him talk about himself like that. How had she never noticed before? "Because I love you, you stupid great prat. If I give up on the man I love, how can I hope to stick with anything else in my life?"
A heartbeat of silence, then, a voice:
"Tonks..."
Not Remus' voice.
Kingsley's.
They had a shift to do at the Ministry.
Damn those Death Eaters to hell.
Tonks looked to Remus, as if to offer him one last chance to speak.
When he did not, she drew in a deep breath, and did her best to smile.
"Right. We'll finish this later? Maybe?"
Still nothing from Remus, who just looked Petrified, and conflicted.
"Night, then." She turned on her heel and, not looking anyone from the Order in the eye as she undid the Muffliato, took a step toward Kingsley--
--but a hand, grasping hers, held her still.
Tonks' eyes fluttered shut as that Snidget which had, apparently, taken up permanent residence in her chest, beat its wings.
Remus' hand, closed around her own.
A gentle tug, toward him, and then--
--he let go of her hand, but only so that his arms could wrap tightly around her waist, holding her tight against him as he pressed his mouth to hers.
Now Hestia and Molly gasped, and a THUNK, followed by a, Goodness gracious me! signified that Dedalus had startled and lost his violet top hat.
Remus Lupin is kissing you in front of the whole. damn. Order of the Phoenix.
And then he wasn't. He was looking into her eyes, stroking her hair back from her face.
"Be safe tonight -- Elphine. I love you."
When Tonks set off into the night, casting one last look at the doorway of Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place, where Remus stood watching her go, it was with a lighter heart than she had arrived with tonight.
At least one of Voldemort's serpents that had slithered into her path had been crushed.
The rest had better watch their tails.
The End
A/N: Can't thank y'all enough for reading and reviewing this story. I hope it's brought as much pleasure to read as it has been to write. And I hope with all my heart Deathly Hallows only opens up more doors to continue writing in this ficverse.
In honor of the release, I offer reviewers a Remus to stand in line with you, holding your hand, or to sit with you hand-in-hand by the mailbox as you wait for the postman. And just for good luck, he'll kiss you in front of everyone else.
Probably none of y'all are even around anymore to read this, but as promised, I've finished Serpents before the release -- though unfortunately not before the metamorfic_moon Last Chance Full Moon Showdown. Still, I won't be too hard on myself; though when I consider that I wrote 66,000 words in a little more than a month, and I've written a chapter of a new novel in a year, I probably should be...
Title: Serpents
Author: MrsTater
Rating & Warnings: R for sexuality
Prompts: weakness; "In the light of Voldemort's return, we are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided."
Word Count: 66,000ish words
Summary: Two years into a relationship with Remus, and the correct way to deal with full moons continues to elude Tonks, dredging up her insecurities and memories of painful past failures. Voldemort's attack on a fellow Order member puts everything into perspective for her...But will Remus see the light?
Author’s Notes: A leap into the future in the Caring For Magical Creatures universe, which I think should stand alone even if you've not read that fic, though the background might make more sense as it's a POA-era R/T romance.
I wish there were words to express how much I appreciate all Godricgal has done throughout the writing of this fic. Your encouragement and support and beta work and most of all your friendship are what made this come to be, and I most want a happy ending for Remus and Tonks in Deathly Hallows so we can keep doing this for a long time to come.
Prologue: Judgment Day | 1. Vicious Cycle | 2. Up From the Grave | 3. Between the Woman and the Serpent | 4. In the Waiting Room | 5. What Was and Is and Is To Come | 6. The Tip Of the Iceberg |
Epilogue: Little Children, Love One Another
"As none of you is unaware..."
Professor Dumbledore, Tonks thought, had probably never addressed the Order of the Phoenix like that before at a meeting where Aberforth and Mundungus Fletcher were present. She wondered if he were thinking the same as his blue eyes behind the half-moon spectacles drifted from face to face around the long kitchen table, before finally settling on her and Kingsley, stood by the staircase, at the ready should they be called to duty for the Ministry.
"...especially not," Dumbledore continued, "those of us who, at this very moment, sacrifice a well-earned hour’s break from investigating the matter...." His gaze moved back to the Order, taking them all in. "...ten of Voldemort's most dangerous Death Eaters -- the very same masked faces some of us have encountered before -- escaped last night from Azkaban."
Despite the news being a day old now, Tonks half-expected at least a few of the Order members -- Hestia and Molly, namely -- to shudder, and perhaps Dedalus Diggle to startle in his chair and lose his violet top hat. They all, however, stared grimly back at Dumbledore, and if any were afraid, either of the name or of the news, they apparently were determined not to show it.
Some were more grim than others: beside her, Kingsley's jaw muscle twitched beneath his smooth brown skin as he gritted his teeth in frustration that while ten real criminals were on the loose, pressure increased on him to track down Sirius Black -- whose eyes were hard and steely. Sirius had his wand to hand, as if he fully expected Dumbledore to send them out to track down the murdering bastards, granting the Order the same powers the Ministry had placed in the hands of the Aurors last time around. Next to Sirius, Remus watched his mate as though he were reading his thoughts and considering disarming him to stop him leaping into the fray.
Tonks quickly looked away, not wanting Remus to catch her watching him, though she didn't think an Expelliarmus on Sirius would be a bad idea. Even if she had begun to understand him better in the past twenty-four hours than she could have imagined relating to a person she'd barely talked to.
Knowing that Bellatrix Lestrange was at large, seeing the wanted posters plastered up all over the Ministry and Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade, had made her more real to Tonks than she ever had been as a faceless aunt her mother kept no photographs of, who was mad and rotting in prison. Rage simmered deep in Tonks' belly to see a resemblance to her mother in that wasted wreck of a face.
Still, she knew that the Death Eaters' madness could only be countered by sanity. However much she'd begun to sympathise with Sirius and feel this battle was personal, she couldn't apply the word sane to him.
Or yourself at the moment, she thought as her eyes darted once more to Remus. Crap time to quarrel with him, the day before all hell breaks loose. How many times did Robards tell you to get your head in the game and stop thinking about being bleeding related to some of the convicts? If he knew you were having bloke trouble again...
"I do not gather you here tonight to formulate a battle strategy," Dumbledore went on, as though he, too, had been reading minds, "for though our opponent has nearly doubled his ranks in one night, the time has not yet come for the Order of the Phoenix to take to the field of battle."
Tonks looked to Sirius again, and saw teeth bared and white knuckles clutching his wand so that it was liable to snap. The look only hardened when Remus caught his eye, and Tonks, though put out as she was by their quarrel, felt an almost magnetic pull to cross the room and stand behind Remus. She might have done, if she had not seen, in her peripheral, Dumbledore's thin, long-fingered hand gesture in her direction.
"Though we should not be without hope," he said with a deferential nod at her and Kingsley, "that we must need encounter these ten again. For there are those trained for just these very circumstances, for the apprehension of Dark Wizards and Witches. They may yet bring them once again to justice before the Death Eaters wreak more of the same harm for which they were first imprisoned."
As the Headmaster spoke, Tonks felt that his was not the only gaze upon her. Glancing at the table, she met Molly's brown eyes, which now revealed her fear, pleading painfully with Tonks to stop those who had killed her brothers last time from bereaving her of her babies now. If Tonks' heart had not already hardened in her chest earlier in the day with the conviction that it was her duty to capture Bellatrix -- though the only thread that tied her to the House of Black was a singed one -- to protect her mother, her father, she was certain it would have done now, to protect these others, who had lately become as dear to her as blood kin.
Mad-Eye, too, watched her; he looked old and somehow nostalgic as he appraised the new generation of Aurors who faced the very same crew he had thrown in Azkaban. Though she did not doubt that nothing would satisfy him so much as personally escorting them back to their temporarily vacated cells, she knew he counted on Kingsley and, dear Merlin, on her, to see finished the work he had started.
Conviction aside, Tonks -- do you really think you're up to it?
Yes. You are more than able.
The answer, the affirmation, did not come from within, but rather was communicated by Remus' eyes as they caught hers. She'd tried not to look at him when she noticed him watching her, but didn't quite manage it to allow her gaze to drift beyond his figure at the table. As his gaze held, she knew that the only way she would be able to look away from him would be if he broke eye contact first.
Of course she couldn't read his expression very well, but her breath caught with the realisation that this time, it was not because that stolid mask he wore hid all, but because he was not wearing it now, and revealed more than she could possibly identify.
His faith was obvious, because she had learnt long ago to believe that he believed in her. Fear mingled with it, which she didn't begrudge him, for if he did not fear for what her chosen path of Dark Wizard Chaser might well bring, he was living in a dream world.
And Remus had made it abundantly clear that he lived nowhere of the sort.
Not to mention the very first time you met him, you remember, he spoke of Aurors Frank and Alice Longbottom as his dear friends -- tortured into insanity by Bellatrix Sodding Lestrange herself.
Tonks also noticed that there was nothing of surprise in his expression, and realised that Remus had known then -- two years ago --- that it was only a matter of time before Voldemort returned and recalled his followers to his service. Nonetheless he had supported her career choice, expressed approval, even -- and had told her later that all along he had her in mind as a recruit when -- not if -- the Order of the Phoenix reconvened. Though he loved her, he had never once tried to protect her from the harsh realities of their world.
Can he learn not to protect you from the harsh reality that lies within himself? If only you could have that hope...It would be enough. You could keep on...
"No," Dumbledore, resumed, and Remus' gaze released Tonks as he returned his attention to their leader. "It is not for soldiering that I gather you here tonight. We gather here, quite simply, to gather."
Dumbledore smiled, and looked at the Order with twinkling eyes. A few smiled back -- Professor Snape was not among them; indeed, he looked as perturbed as Sirius about not being called to battle, that he had been drawn from his dungeon chambers to socialise.
"For it is in this that we differ from the Death Eaters," Dumbledore continued. "They are the servants of Voldemort -- but you are my friends. Their loyalty to one another exceeds no further than each one's grasp, but each of us joined the Order of the Phoenix in order to protect something beyond ourselves. Be it husbands, or wives, or children, or parents, or friends, or simply fellow human beings. We are here because love's eyes look outward."
We bear each other up, Remus had said. Everything he had told her about the Order of the Phoenix echoed in harmonic counterpoint with Dumbledore's speech as she fingered the Rune of Humanity on her charm bracelet.
"But remember," said Dumbeldore, in a tone that held warning. "We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided. Look that you do not let the Death Eaters' weakness become your own."
Tonks' eyes went to Hestia, who she was a little surprised to find looking at her. A bit red in the face, as Tonks had felt her own cheeks flush. At the same moment, they mouthed, I'm sorry.
Glancing across the table, Tonks saw Sirius' eyes downcast. She guessed that he and Remus would be on speaking terms again; but she knew Sirius' fury against Snape would rage all the more bitter.
She looked to Remus beside him, who had been looking at Sirius, but apparently had felt her gaze on him and shifted his to her.
You're on the same page now. Or want to be.
"Headmaster," Kingsley said quietly in the pause, "Tonks and I--"
"Are needed elsewhere," Dumbledore said, again with the deferential nod. "Know that as you go forth, we hold you in our thoughts, and bid you Godspeed."
"Thank you," said Kingsley. "C'mon, Tonks."
But rather than turning to ascend the stairs, Tonks had stepped toward the table, eyes locked on Remus.
Oh no -- don't you dare do what you're thinking of doing. Not in front of the whole Order.
She didn't listen to the inner voice of restraint, but instead stumbled around a waste bin en route to the other side of the table.
The legs of Remus' chair scraped against the floor, and he stood.
He's going to bolt. Or else just brace himself against something he doesn't want to hear.
No! He wants to speak to you! That speech moved him, too!
Tonks took out her wand, glanced at the Order and muttered an apology, then cast a Muffliato.
"I don't want to get married," she blurted. "I mean, I do, someday. Maybe. But I'm not ready yet. We're not ready."
"I'm sorry, Elphine," said Remus. "I wish--"
"But I am a Hufflepuff," she cut him off, and he actually gave a little start, his sandy brows shooting high up on his forehead. "People think we're a lot of duffers, but we're not. We're loyal, and hard-working -- and I'm no less loyal or hard-working than any Hufflepuff."
A smile ghosted Remus' face. "That you are a true Hufflepuff," he said, "I have never had a moment's doubt."
"Liar -- remember that one time you asked if I was a Slytherin?"
Again Remus looked wrong-footed, even took a step back from her. "That was--"
"Stupid," she answered for him, unable to stop herself, or the flood of words that tumbled out after. "But I'd been stupid first, so it all cancels out. The point is -- neither of us is perfect, Remus. We can both be absolute idiots. And we've got a whole crapload of problems between us, but that doesn't mean we ought to turn tail and run. You're a Gryffindor -- you face problems. And I'm a Hufflepuff -- I don't give up till I've solved a problem, even if I fall flat on my face -- which I do often -- and have to try again and again."
She paused to catch her breath, and Remus looked a little breathless, as well, as he stared at her. She felt herself wavering, as she felt dozens of eyes on her back, and imagined them all trying to imagine what the hell the crazy young one was going on about.
But she wasn't the sort to profess herself as a Hufflepuff, through-and-through, and then give up before she'd said her piece.
So she continued, though more tentatively than before: "Maybe you'd rather not keep trying with someone who keeps falling flat on her face," she said, not wanting to think about how she'd perform tonight if he said no, he'd rather not. "If you do...I won't give up on you, Remus. Not ever. Even if those darker days do happen for...for werewolves, like you said."
Remus looked gobsmacked, to be sure. She'd have preferred him to look a little touched. Maybe he was -- but his guard was up again, his eyes fixed just to the right of her face.
You're doing this to him in front of everyone, what do you expect? Work with what you can get.
"Why?" he asked, his voice raw. "Why would you bind yourself to that?"
"Why?" Tonks repeated, her heart constricting painfully, with anger or sadness or both at hearing him talk about himself like that. How had she never noticed before? "Because I love you, you stupid great prat. If I give up on the man I love, how can I hope to stick with anything else in my life?"
A heartbeat of silence, then, a voice:
"Tonks..."
Not Remus' voice.
Kingsley's.
They had a shift to do at the Ministry.
Damn those Death Eaters to hell.
Tonks looked to Remus, as if to offer him one last chance to speak.
When he did not, she drew in a deep breath, and did her best to smile.
"Right. We'll finish this later? Maybe?"
Still nothing from Remus, who just looked Petrified, and conflicted.
"Night, then." She turned on her heel and, not looking anyone from the Order in the eye as she undid the Muffliato, took a step toward Kingsley--
--but a hand, grasping hers, held her still.
Tonks' eyes fluttered shut as that Snidget which had, apparently, taken up permanent residence in her chest, beat its wings.
Remus' hand, closed around her own.
A gentle tug, toward him, and then--
--he let go of her hand, but only so that his arms could wrap tightly around her waist, holding her tight against him as he pressed his mouth to hers.
Now Hestia and Molly gasped, and a THUNK, followed by a, Goodness gracious me! signified that Dedalus had startled and lost his violet top hat.
Remus Lupin is kissing you in front of the whole. damn. Order of the Phoenix.
And then he wasn't. He was looking into her eyes, stroking her hair back from her face.
"Be safe tonight -- Elphine. I love you."
When Tonks set off into the night, casting one last look at the doorway of Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place, where Remus stood watching her go, it was with a lighter heart than she had arrived with tonight.
At least one of Voldemort's serpents that had slithered into her path had been crushed.
The rest had better watch their tails.
The End
A/N: Can't thank y'all enough for reading and reviewing this story. I hope it's brought as much pleasure to read as it has been to write. And I hope with all my heart Deathly Hallows only opens up more doors to continue writing in this ficverse.
In honor of the release, I offer reviewers a Remus to stand in line with you, holding your hand, or to sit with you hand-in-hand by the mailbox as you wait for the postman. And just for good luck, he'll kiss you in front of everyone else.