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So, apparently I do Tumblr now. Sorry. Here's your periodic "keep alive" signal.
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So, I was listening to this song (Lyin' Ass Bitch, by Fishbone), thinkin’ about the myriad ways I was a terrible partner for my ex, and the many ways I was complicit in the end of it, as you do. And I realized that my invisible “no touchy” box ONLY ever comes down when the prospect of sex is involved. I literally don’t know how to turn it off. And ( Read more... ) -
Mass update
Current "life is shit" stressors: quitting smoking not going so well, actually; house hunt totally failing; 18 year old incompetent to care for himself, but is just as annoying and needy as he's always been; Ex-husband is dicking me around; cat has started running away from pill time; kids have cabin fever and fight; Tuition is due soon with zero ( Read more... ) -
I seriously need to fuckin' chill
Wow. Yeah. Two pills plus a wee bit of caffeine is a total rush. (Empty stomach) Like, yeah. My “GO!” dial just got turned up to, like, 15. I am so hardcore right now. Like, jump off a bridge/bungee jumping levels of hardcore. Nobody ask for my opinion on stupid shit right now, you’ll get your ears burned off. And yet, still overall ( Read more... ) -
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2nd confirming MRI done. I have officially named them Dubstep Tubes. High as fuck seems to be the way to do it. Just loosen your brain & let the noise bring on hallucinations. Now to get home through the rain. -
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So, I upped the dose, as instructed, of the "don't be a useless sack of goo" meds this morning, and as is evident by my constant posts on FB, I was not completely exhausted today. For a change. But I still can't brain, type, or even correctly click on shit. So, still phenomenally dysfunctional. I think I'm gonna make Elder Son cook dinner tonight. -
I hate this. I hate this I hate this I hate this
I get about 3 hours after I get up in the morning where I'm functional. My brain works, I don't trip over stuff or drop stuff, and I'm not exhausted. Then it all goes away, and I can barely sit upright ( Read more... ) -
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So far *today* I have complained about being dizzy, clumsy, weak, exhausted, and having difficulty speaking. (Slurring and word choice.) And I'm already completely OVER other MS patients coming out of the woodwork and telling me how they're fine.
Edit: other noteworthy symptom - have 0 appetite, and am frankly often repulsed by food and eating. -
Epic Medical Update
Please read it all, cuz I'm already sick of talking about it.
As you may know, I've been dealing with a progressive poor condition illness for the past year, plus. I blamed the psych meds, though repeated doctor visits and blood tests for everything they have tests for found no actual reason.
I finally asked to be bumped up the food chain, and got a ( Read more... ) -
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So, I was watching Librarians and, holy shit, this is me ( Read more... )