oNe | phone/action

[miraculls]

[Phone]

Whooooooa. How are -- how are all these motherfuckin' voices be coming from this little tubething? Motherfuckin' miracles, man.

[There's a looooooong pause, and it seems like Gamzee might have wandered off and forgotten to hang up until he speaks up again.]Uhhhhh...pretty sure my skin ain't all being pink last time I checked. 'Cept for

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[miraculls]

[That's okay, here's what Gamzee's picturing Pinkie as right now.

[miraculls]

Naaaaaw, it be taking me more than five seconds to all up and pick up the things what I dropped from my thinkpan. I just gotta get my appreciate on about the world, you know? Just really look at all the beautiful shit around us.

[partysense]

Oh! Well, nothing wrong with appreciating the world, yep!

[miraculls]

Yeah, that's what I always be saying! Like shit, take this fucking pink starmonkey skin I've all up and got now. Fuck, it's so colorful and shit, how it be doing that? Fucking beautiful.

[partysense]

Starmonkey? [okay her mental image of him has changed slightly in a disturbing way.] You mean... your skin is changing colors?

[miraculls]

[c-could it possibly get any more disturbing than that picture up there...] Yeah, it used to be all gray and shit like every troll's! But then I be waking up in this hive and it was all what starmonkey pink. Fucking miracles, right?

[partysense]

Wow! That sure sounds like a miracle! If I woke up and I was another color, I'd have to change my name to... Greeny Pie! Or Bluey Pie!

[miraculls]

Oh fuck, you think I what all gotta change my motherfuckin' name now? Shit, I don't really know any starmonkey names....

[partysense]

Um... Maybe Gamzee Monkara?

[you can practically hear her straining to think. this is sad.]

[miraculls]

[What's sadder is that Gamzee finds this to be pure genius.]

Whoaaaa, that name be fucking dope! You one motherfuckin' smart pie, my pink pastry sister. You sure you ain't a starmonkey yourself?

[partysense]

[oh god why

they're meant to be]

Nope, just a regular old pony! No stars or anything!

[miraculls]

Uhhhhh...[looooooooong pause]

...you're...a hoofbeast pie? [THINKPAN HURTING and now Gamzee's mental image of Pinkie just got more disturbing too and looks something like this:

[partysense]

[AS IF THAT WASN'T A TERRIFYING ENOUGH PICTURE ALREADY]

Hoofbeast? I dunno. I don't think I'm that beastly. But I've got hooves! And I'm a proud Pie!

[miraculls]

[IT JUST WANTS TO LOVE YOU]

Whoooooooa, chica, you just be made of motherfuckin' miracles! Haha, get your motherfuckin' pride on all up over the place!

[partysense]

I've got lots of it!! Oh, but now I'm wondering, Gamzee!

What's a motherfucker?

[miraculls]

Shit, it only be the blessed word sent down by the Mirthful Messiahs themselves! A brother just don't feel right without using motherfuckin' motherfucker all the motherfuckin' time, you know what I'm saying?