Crappy point-form recap of "Safe Haven"
Woot. Another crappy point-form CM episode recap. This time I'm watching the "Unsub = Creepy Teen" episode, Safe Haven
I don't think this one will end up being as detailed as the one I did for JJ, but nonetheless, I enjoyed doing the last one so much that I wanted to try it again.
So we know this ep's going to be Morgan-centric from the intro. Previously on Criminal Minds: Spicer makes Morgan promise him that he will look after Ellie, and thus begins the most elaborate postmortem guilt trip since Tobias Hankel.
God, it's so horribly effective when they use happy, uptempo music as the soundtrack for a gruesome murder.
I have to say, this is one of the creepier prologues to an episode. The lazy tapping of the knife against the bannisters as the unsub walks upstairs is just... *shudders*
Yikes! Stabby! Graphic!
Aw, Garcia, hun. She can't even look at her own powerpoint presentation. :(
The girl who plays Ellie is a really great little actress, I must say. It's too bad I keep getting distracted by her Snow-White-esque halloween wig.
Okay, I REALLY hate to call bullshit, especially consiering that I love this show so much, but have the writers ever BEEN through security in an American airport? Ellie has about 5 different checkpoints to hit up before she even gets on the plane. Not a single person suspected anything? Dubious. Meh. I'll let it slide for the sake of entertainment.
Sweet! Throwback to "The Fox"!!!
Rossi and Reid are becoming quite the dynamic duo these days. Hotch seems to pair them up on every case. Aaaand somewhere out there, dozens of Reid/Rossi shippers are clenching their fists and shouting, "STFU, BITCH! YOU'LL JINX IT!"
FADHJ;DFSHGaldg;hdshg *SPAZ*! Reid's wearing his Chucks again. And my world continues to spin on its axis.
Though... I'm still waiting for the triumphant return of the messenger bag, Spence. Any day now. *taps foot impatiently*
Oh, sweet Moses... Emily, I'm trying to pay attention to what you're saying, but there's a picture of a woman's mutilated face right behind your left shoulder. Sometimes I'm surprised by how graphic they allow these primetime shows to be (then again, I watched an episode of "The Tudors" this Tues at my parents' house, and when Codswollop or Cobknobber or whatever the fuck his name is gets drawn and quartered I turned away and screamed, "BAAAAGH! IT LOOKS REAL! IT LOOKS REAL!")
Actually, now that I think about it, "The Tudors" airs on Showtime, so it's not meant to be a network prime-time show like CM, but they re-run the eps at 9pm on CBC so... Go Canada?
TANGENT!!!!!
Hey, the unsub is young-Ben from "Lost"!!! I almost didn't recognize him without his Ben glasses and bullet wound.
So Reverend Pickup Truck seems like a really nice guy. Too bad he's going to die in t-minus five minutes.
Rossi and Reid pull up to the crime scene just as a cop is giving another cop a hand to climb up the hill. SEE, ROSSI??? THAT is how you help someone out of a ditch. I'm sure Reid was thinking it.
Oh, and was I the only one who noticed that Rossi didn't even pull the SUV over onto the shoulder? He just parked it smack-dab in the middle of the highway's right-hand lane. FBI perks, I guess. Does that mean they can park in handicapped stalls too? I hope not.
"If I get herpes, it's your fault!" AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Laughing... so... hard... Best line of the episode. Especially considering that the little girl says this to her brother.
This episode is doing bad things for the future of hitchhiking in America.
Yeesh. Mom's massacring that chicken. I wish she'd look up and see that creepy Ben is giving her the "I clearly want to thrust that knife into your torso" look.
CULPEPPER! Sorry. It just came to me.
Morgan and Prentiss! Rockin' the flak-jackets. Love it.
-Ben: "Do you ever wonder what's under your skin?" This kid needs to go see "Body Worlds". Maybe then he wouldn't be so curious.
So freakin' cool...
LOL! Rossi: "What? I know things!" Oh, Lord. I have to pause the video for a sec. Laughing too hard. That was ace delivery, Mr. Mantegna!
I just noticed Garcia's necklace. I want it.
EEEP! He killed the mom!! I did not see that coming. So whose day are Morgan and Prentiss going to save now???
Oh. He has a sister.
-Garcia: "I'm an only child." Uh... continuity error, anyone? Let me refer back to Season 2 Episode 2 "P911", and I quote: "That's a tadpole shirt. Tadpoles, it's a wilderness group. Knot-tying... compass-wielding... boy's stuff. I have four brothers, JJ, they all had that shirt." *sigh* The only possible answer to this conundrum is that we know Garcia had a stepdad... perhaps these four brothers were actually step-brothers? Nonetheless, if they were in tadpoles, that means she would've known them when they were all five or six years old, thus rendering her self-professed naiveté when it comes to the intricacies of sibling rivalry highly, highly unlikely. I hope they clear this up in the future somehow. *facepalm*
You abandon your psychopath 13-year-old boy at a hospital to get him away from your daughter, and then you continue to hide the house key under the same brick??. Sometimes I think some of these victims deserve it.
One fetus consumed the other??? That happens? *googles* Well, I'll be damned.
Oh wait, nevermind. The mom only needed to have surgery. She's still alive.
-Rossi: "The BAU should keep his (Ben/Jeremy's) file handy" Ooooh... do I sense a recurring character????
Ellie's mom isn't dead? I must not have been paying enough attention during ODH/TLN. Well, I'm glad there's a happy resolution to that storyline at least. Morgan is so good at being the comforter. This scene was very sweet. Will this be the last we see of Ellie?
So that's it. The end! Only one last point to address:
Libby, Bernard, Ethan, Mr. Friendly, young Ben... who will be the next "Lost" peripheral character to appear on Criminal Minds??? I hope it's Richard Alpert. He'd make a kick-ass unsub.
Whew! That took longer than I thought it would. Still, it's fun.
Til next week,
Jo out.
I don't think this one will end up being as detailed as the one I did for JJ, but nonetheless, I enjoyed doing the last one so much that I wanted to try it again.
So we know this ep's going to be Morgan-centric from the intro. Previously on Criminal Minds: Spicer makes Morgan promise him that he will look after Ellie, and thus begins the most elaborate postmortem guilt trip since Tobias Hankel.
God, it's so horribly effective when they use happy, uptempo music as the soundtrack for a gruesome murder.
I have to say, this is one of the creepier prologues to an episode. The lazy tapping of the knife against the bannisters as the unsub walks upstairs is just... *shudders*
Yikes! Stabby! Graphic!
Aw, Garcia, hun. She can't even look at her own powerpoint presentation. :(
The girl who plays Ellie is a really great little actress, I must say. It's too bad I keep getting distracted by her Snow-White-esque halloween wig.
Okay, I REALLY hate to call bullshit, especially consiering that I love this show so much, but have the writers ever BEEN through security in an American airport? Ellie has about 5 different checkpoints to hit up before she even gets on the plane. Not a single person suspected anything? Dubious. Meh. I'll let it slide for the sake of entertainment.
Sweet! Throwback to "The Fox"!!!
Rossi and Reid are becoming quite the dynamic duo these days. Hotch seems to pair them up on every case. Aaaand somewhere out there, dozens of Reid/Rossi shippers are clenching their fists and shouting, "STFU, BITCH! YOU'LL JINX IT!"
FADHJ;DFSHGaldg;hdshg *SPAZ*! Reid's wearing his Chucks again. And my world continues to spin on its axis.
Though... I'm still waiting for the triumphant return of the messenger bag, Spence. Any day now. *taps foot impatiently*
Oh, sweet Moses... Emily, I'm trying to pay attention to what you're saying, but there's a picture of a woman's mutilated face right behind your left shoulder. Sometimes I'm surprised by how graphic they allow these primetime shows to be (then again, I watched an episode of "The Tudors" this Tues at my parents' house, and when Codswollop or Cobknobber or whatever the fuck his name is gets drawn and quartered I turned away and screamed, "BAAAAGH! IT LOOKS REAL! IT LOOKS REAL!")
Actually, now that I think about it, "The Tudors" airs on Showtime, so it's not meant to be a network prime-time show like CM, but they re-run the eps at 9pm on CBC so... Go Canada?
TANGENT!!!!!
Hey, the unsub is young-Ben from "Lost"!!! I almost didn't recognize him without his Ben glasses and bullet wound.
So Reverend Pickup Truck seems like a really nice guy. Too bad he's going to die in t-minus five minutes.
Rossi and Reid pull up to the crime scene just as a cop is giving another cop a hand to climb up the hill. SEE, ROSSI??? THAT is how you help someone out of a ditch. I'm sure Reid was thinking it.
Oh, and was I the only one who noticed that Rossi didn't even pull the SUV over onto the shoulder? He just parked it smack-dab in the middle of the highway's right-hand lane. FBI perks, I guess. Does that mean they can park in handicapped stalls too? I hope not.
"If I get herpes, it's your fault!" AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Laughing... so... hard... Best line of the episode. Especially considering that the little girl says this to her brother.
This episode is doing bad things for the future of hitchhiking in America.
Yeesh. Mom's massacring that chicken. I wish she'd look up and see that creepy Ben is giving her the "I clearly want to thrust that knife into your torso" look.
CULPEPPER! Sorry. It just came to me.
Morgan and Prentiss! Rockin' the flak-jackets. Love it.
-Ben: "Do you ever wonder what's under your skin?" This kid needs to go see "Body Worlds". Maybe then he wouldn't be so curious.
So freakin' cool...
LOL! Rossi: "What? I know things!" Oh, Lord. I have to pause the video for a sec. Laughing too hard. That was ace delivery, Mr. Mantegna!
I just noticed Garcia's necklace. I want it.
EEEP! He killed the mom!! I did not see that coming. So whose day are Morgan and Prentiss going to save now???
Oh. He has a sister.
-Garcia: "I'm an only child." Uh... continuity error, anyone? Let me refer back to Season 2 Episode 2 "P911", and I quote: "That's a tadpole shirt. Tadpoles, it's a wilderness group. Knot-tying... compass-wielding... boy's stuff. I have four brothers, JJ, they all had that shirt." *sigh* The only possible answer to this conundrum is that we know Garcia had a stepdad... perhaps these four brothers were actually step-brothers? Nonetheless, if they were in tadpoles, that means she would've known them when they were all five or six years old, thus rendering her self-professed naiveté when it comes to the intricacies of sibling rivalry highly, highly unlikely. I hope they clear this up in the future somehow. *facepalm*
You abandon your psychopath 13-year-old boy at a hospital to get him away from your daughter, and then you continue to hide the house key under the same brick??. Sometimes I think some of these victims deserve it.
One fetus consumed the other??? That happens? *googles* Well, I'll be damned.
Oh wait, nevermind. The mom only needed to have surgery. She's still alive.
-Rossi: "The BAU should keep his (Ben/Jeremy's) file handy" Ooooh... do I sense a recurring character????
Ellie's mom isn't dead? I must not have been paying enough attention during ODH/TLN. Well, I'm glad there's a happy resolution to that storyline at least. Morgan is so good at being the comforter. This scene was very sweet. Will this be the last we see of Ellie?
So that's it. The end! Only one last point to address:
Libby, Bernard, Ethan, Mr. Friendly, young Ben... who will be the next "Lost" peripheral character to appear on Criminal Minds??? I hope it's Richard Alpert. He'd make a kick-ass unsub.
Whew! That took longer than I thought it would. Still, it's fun.
Til next week,
Jo out.