I don't even know. I don't know if I can even write about this to sort this out. I've got a gamut of emotions right now. I'm not sure whether to laugh or cry and I don't even know why I'd want to cry. I'm just so jumbled up right now, it's ridiculous. And wicked confusing. Like I just don't even know. I feel like I've been bombarded with so so much ( Read more... )

um, wow. I'm just kind of blown away. 

 I mean, he's not adorable but it's not like he's ugly either. But I don't know if what I feel is real or if it's just because I think he might be interested in me, ya know? His attention doesn't make me uncomfortable, though, like it did with Scott. But I don't want it to be my feelings and my mind. I want it to be of and from God. I want Him to ( Read more... )

Come here and cry on my shoulder.
I'll hold you 'til it's over. 
I'll rescue you tonight. 
Let my arms be your shelter, 
your hiding place forever.
I'll love you more than life.

I'm tired of being strong. and alone. 

I think somehow I always knew this would happen. Even from the very beginning. It's not like I imagined it would be. My reaction wasn't anything like I once expected. I've actually been waiting for this moment. I knew it was only a matter of time. It was in no way train-related or mack truck-related. It was a gentle pause as if something was slowly ( Read more... )

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Just break me, Lord, until I am wholly Yours. Do whatever it takes. I don't care anymore. I'm tired of surviving instead of living. I'm through with just going through the motions. I want to feel again. I want to embrace the day and make the most of every moment. I'm tired of this. I'm just tired all the time. I'd actually like to feel awake and ( Read more... )

You know all that stuff that used to hold me back? Those barriers? Honestly, I don't care about them anymore. It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that I am here. alone. and you are there. with her. happy. I don't know how to move on. Not when it feels like nothing. Not when there's still hope. Even if it's foolish hope. I feel nothing ( Read more... )

It's wicked hard not to take this personally because I've worked for this for a LONG time and I finally get here. 3 months. and basically all I got out of that evaluation was that I suck. I felt like I was being compared. & the result was that I was founding lacking.. immensely lacking. I've only been at this for 3 months and I'm expected to stack ( Read more... )

At the foot of the Cross I stand broken. I stand incomplete, lost, with fragile hope mingled with utter despair. Only through the grace and strength of Christ am I able to take step after single step. Only in the love of God am I able to face the day. Only through the cross is my hope defeating despair and despondency. Though I stand broken, the ( Read more... )