I used to think he was insane. Now I'm not so sure.

( Enjoy these selected Mike Tyson Quotes )

Since February, I've worked all but 7 Saturdays in order to keep up with work in the shop. 6 of those Saturdays, time burglars got to me. Today was my first Saturday to do whatever I wanted in about 6 months. So, naturally, I decided to go wake up the south side (i.e. driving around at 8am with my windows down, blaring Otis Redding so loud that I ( Read more... )

With the looming release of the Aldsvider, 2007 is looking to be a banner year for Fjord. And for World's Largest Midgets. After the completion of El Disparador, Smokey y El Bandito should be on track to begin filming in late summer. I may need more cars. If anyone has, like, a 1980 Malibu or a 1973 Dodge Polara in brown that could be used as ( Read more... )

Say hello to Iceman, first member of the Festiva Fagtion.

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I've had to work 3 out of the last 4 Saturdays in order to keep up with the shit people throw at me during the week. On the bright side, the overtime I'll get on this next check should allow me to plot the Gourmandball Run - a 3 day, 3 state, 600 mile culinary tour de force beginning with the Fool's Gold Claim Rush and ending with Sunday brunch at ( Read more... )

Like KaBar'n babies in a maternity ward, I tells ya. I still haven't recovered the sacred artifact that my Order quest requires, but I did find something else. One Pipe to rule them all, One Pipe to smoke them, One Pipe to make them hungry and in the fumeage choke them. And an appropriate hat. "Party like it's ought-one," that's my motto. Except ( Read more... )

I've been nudged. I don't know what that means, but I assume I'm supposed to post more ( Read more... )

VH1 has finally gone off the deep end of reality TV, and I couldn't be happier. All these shows on TV are so ridiculous, but these magnificent bastards honestly either ran out of ideas - or they were saving their best for last. 'The White Rapper Show' is FUCKING GENIUS. It's like 'Real World' meets 'American Idol' meets Malibu's Most Wanted. Genius ( Read more... )

I'll be damned if Rather is gonna break that story. Spysville didn't win the NFC, and we were not surprised. The finalist movies always suck. The winning spy film was a magnificent turd called Foxxy Madonna vs. The Black Death, which from the title I expected to be a delightful blaxploitation romp. It was not ( Read more... )

If you ever get the chance I highly recommend spending a week or so squatting in a flophouse. You can tell yourself you're doing it because it's a cheaper introspective vacation than backpacking through Europe. At the very least, it'll give you a renewed appreciation for running water: there's nothing quite like once again having a working toilet ( Read more... )