Today, I was attacked by some strange people named "reporters," and as a group they were called "press." I can certainly understand why, I'm squished. They took a lot of "photographs," using this little machine that drew a picture of me on something called "film." I have no idea what this thing does, but there were lots of flashing lights and ( Read more... )

I've been doing absolutely nothing, since, he left, nothing worth noting in this diary. My husband is too determined to blow Melkor to smithereens to notice me, Hercules is gone, Legolas ran for the hills, and all of my servants know what a foul mood I am in so they won't even attempt to start a conversation with me. Life is so empty, that there ( Read more... )

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Whether or not it matters now, this morning I found an account of our (we being Hercules and I, that is) meeting, from a futuristic perspective, on my bedside table in my palace. The author remains anonymous, but anyway, I will place the document in this diary.

( The Account )

Okay, okay, it's all right, I'm not going to cry. (here, Varda bawls) Why do these things always happen to me?? First, Melkor sinks my kingdom and makes my lovely Taniquetil a frigging ISLAND, and then, he becomes Kevin Sorbo, see?. How am I going to tell the difference now?! He could just come and be Hercules, and I wouldn't even know the ( Read more... )

I'm so excited for tonight: Hercules and I are taking Melian and Thingol to this great "tickno" club to go dancing!! It should be excellent fun. Would any others like to join us? We can have a big bash, and celebrate all of the Ainur's birthdays, however a little late. Oh, what fun ( Read more... )

I've found a new plaything: his name is Hercules. You can visit him here and here. Isn't he precious? When I was out walking in the forest this afternoon, I was ambushed by a gaggle of Orcs, and all of a sudden, a rift in spacetime appeared a few feet from me, and out pops the dashing Hercules. He knocks each of the 30-some bamboozled Orcs ( Read more... )

Today is my birthday party, in which all are invited to come, bring lots of presents.

And tomorrow, the day after my birthday party, Iluvatar, my daddy, is taking me to England, isn't that precious?

Oh, I'm so excited. Wish me fun?

Ta!

Today, I decided to purchase a baby dragon from Melkor's black market. I think I'll call him Bragollach, as "Sudden Flame" is a very appropriate name for this little creature.

Bragollach

( Read more... )

Varda is sitting upon her cushy, golden throne in Valinor, being absolutely and completely bored.

“Manwë!” she shouts. “Bring me a glass of water.”

“Yes, Milady, I am your humble servant,” he replies from somewhere about the hall.

“And be quick about it!” she adds.

Sighing, she thinks about how utterly boring her life is. Sometimes she is ( Read more... )