Crash Into Me -- Pt 2

[lotrspnfangirl]

Return to Part One...

Jensen nodded and tucked his head softly against Jared’s chest letting the steady thump of the other man’s heart beat lull him to sleep. He dreamt of the cold. He was standing in the middle of an ice-covered lake with the ice starting to creep up his legs. He was frozen to the spot, unable to move. The ice spread slowly up his legs, crept like a serpent up his body to begin to cover his neck, and he struggled against its confines knowing that once it reached his head he would be fighting to breathe. It was consuming him, leaving him powerless. Then, just as the ice started to form over his face, he felt heat spreading through his body. He gasped, his eyes flying open and dancing wildly around in the darkness.

“Hey, you okay?” Jared’s voice was calm, soft against his ear and he could feel Jared’s hands running circles over his bare chest. Jensen nodded, his breathing still coming in deep gasps as he met Jared’s eyes, brightly illuminated by their small fire.

“Yeah, I’m good,” he whispered and forced himself to concentrate on slowing his breathing back down to a normal rate. It would do nothing for them if he started having a panic attack in their small den. Jared seemed to sense his rising panic, however, and soon his lips were against Jensen’s, kissing away the remnants of the dream. “You should get some sleep,” Jensen said after a moment as Jared pulled away from his lips.

“Yeah, okay,” Jared smiled in agreement. “I think we’re about halfway through the night…” Jensen followed his gaze out of the cave opening and blinked against the fire’s glare to look at the small bit of sky he could see.

“You let me sleep that long? We’re in this together. Let me pull my share…” he accused, looking back to Jared who shrugged.

“You needed it.” It went unspoken that Jared needed it too. Jensen quietly helped pull Jared’s arm free of the sleeve and they twisted around a bit so Jensen’s arm was now the one able to stoke the fire whenever its heat began to dwindle. Jared shifted slightly, pressing his one knee between Jensen’s and winding his arms around the younger man’s waist as he pressed his face against Jen’s bare chest. His breath was hot against Jensen’s skin and it made him shivered in Jared’s arms.

Jared’s breath soon evened out making the younger man feel more at ease. After adding a few more branches to their fire, Jensen spent his time studying Jared’s sleeping face. The other man looked so calm, so peaceful as he slept with his cheek flush against Jensen’s chest. Jensen couldn’t deny he had missed this kind of familiarity…

Slowly, he used his free hand to brush his knuckles against Jared’s cheek. Jared’s eyes flickered behind his lids, but he was otherwise still. Jensen’s breath caught as he realized how comfortable he felt, wrapped around this half-naked stranger. Jared was beautiful and strong, and he had a hell of a lot more self-assurance than Jensen himself possessed. Maybe…. Maybe when they were out of here, if they managed to get themselves rescued…. Maybe Jared would reconsider his ‘no-relationship’ rule.

Jensen smiled as he heard the deep rumbling of Jared snoring, glad the man was able to rest so peacefully. Then, as the rumbling grew louder, he looked down at Jared, confused. Jared’s lips were still, and closed… the deep rumbling was not coming from Jared.

Jensen felt his heart rate pick up. What if it was a bear? The thought flew across Jensen’s mind and he felt his heart thudding within his chest. He was being ridiculous… Jared had said there wouldn’t be bears… but… didn’t bears live in caves? Jensen held his breath, cocking his head closer towards the mouth of the cave, listening.

The rumbling got louder, more… motorized? Jensen gasped, wriggling out of Jared’s sleepy hold to push his body closer to the opening.

“Jensen?” Jared murmured his voice thick with sleep. He reached between them, rubbing at his eyes, but awkwardly pushed himself upright to peer outside with Jensen. “What’s wrong? What…”

“Shhh… Do you hear that?” Jensen whispered, wishing his heart would stop pounding so frantically in his chest. He could hear it echoing in his mind, he could feel it pulsing through the cut in his thigh. “Jared, do you hear that?”

Jared gasped, struggling to get them out of the confines of the jackets. “Come on! Get up Jen!” Jared ripped the jackets open and once freed, used one of the bigger branches to push the fire back, giving him the access he needed to crawl out of the cave. He reached down waiting for Jensen to hand him the jackets before following them out himself. Jared held out a hand to haul Jensen to his feet and then ducked back down to grab their shirts, hats and gloves. They struggled into their warmer, drier clothing quickly and looked out across the snowy field before them.

“Come on, come on,” Jared was chanting under his breath, his arms wrapped around himself.

Jensen could see his breath puffing with each word and he crossed his fingers as he tucked them under his arm pits. It had to be a motor, it had to be. God, he begged silently, please let it be a motor…

“Jared,” Jensen’s voice cracked as a dim light crept through the tree line to their left, casting light shadows over where they stood. Slowly the dim light shone brighter. He shifted closer, reaching out and finding Jared’s hand as Jared had been reaching for his. Their gloved fingers threaded together and Jensen whispered his name again, “Jared!”

“Headlights! Snowmobile headlights, Jen!” Jared whispered back excitedly, before releasing Jensen’s hand and stumbling forward, away from their ice cave wall and started flailing his arms frantically above his head all the while screaming. “Hey! Hey! We’re over here! Hey! Help!”

Jensen felt rooted to the spot, the ice holding him there frozen as a statue. The headlights spun in their direction, they could hear deep voices calling out over the noise of the vehicles. They were going to be rescued. Relief washed dizzily over him, melting the ice from his limbs, and he stumbled up beside Jared, reaching out to cling to his side.

It seemed like they stood there for ages, staring in disbelief as three sleek snowmobiles came gliding over the drifts of snow to finally stop a few yards away from them, the noisy engines breaking through the snowy silence.

“Hey! You guys okay?” the first snowmobiler asked, swinging his leg over the side of the vehicle and ripping off his helmet. Underneath he wore a ski mask, but his blue eyes were shining with concern as he eyed the two stranded men before him.

“Thank God,” Jared was shaking beside him, his resolve starting to crack and Jensen grabbed his arm tighter, afraid Jared would pitch forward if he released his hold. “We were on the bus…”

“We didn’t think there were any survivors,” the man nodded, turning around to look at one of the other rescuers. “Call it in, Steve.”

The second man, Steve, nodded and pulling his helmet off so he could radio back the news of the team’s discovery. Jensen looked over the man before him, noticing the logo on the breast of his ski jacket: Maine Fish and Game Officer.

“We looked over the bus’s passenger roster and saw there were two bodies unaccounted for… we had hoped… but didn’t expect after the rapid temperature drop last night…. Good thing you boys stayed close to the wreckage.”

Jensen nodded absently and started to feel like he was shaking apart. His ears started ringing and although the officer was still talking, he couldn’t hear a word. Drifting as if in a dream, he allowed himself to be lead to a snowmobile, felt someone gently but firmly manhandle his body onto the seat, and then held on as if his life depended on it when he was instructed to do so.

Jared was on the back of another snowmobile traveling beside him and Jensen threw a look over his shoulder and met Jared’s half-lidded eyes, squinting against the rising sun before them. He tightened his hold on the driver’s waist and closed his eyes. They were saved.



“Mr. Ackles?” the nurse knocked on his door and entered the hospital room with a smile on her face. Jensen pushed himself up higher in the bed and smiled back at her. “I think we’re going to get you out of here today, what do you think about that?” He had spent the last three days in the hospital - his leg had needed stitches and he’d been started on an antibiotic to fight the infection that had localized in the wound. Jared had set his shoulder almost perfectly, so with ice - much to Jensen’s dismay- along with a nice supply of pain medication, his shoulder was going to be fine.

He was dehydrated. He had hypothermia. But he was alive.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” he shook his head and focused back on the nurse, embarrassed he had zoned out.

She smiled and patted his hand before repeating herself, “I asked if you had anyone that would be able to take you home?”

“Yes,” a voice came from the doorway and Jensen’s eyes snapped upward, his heart leaping into his throat. Jared leaned against the door frame, a small smile on his lips as he met Jensen’s eyes. The taller man looked good, a pink blush over his cheeks, his hair falling gently around his face and he lifted a hand to push it back behind his ears, hazel eyes never leaving Jensen’s face. “I’ll make sure he gets home alright.”

Jensen nodded, giving the nurse the approval she needed, but was too afraid to speak. When he had awoken the first night and asked about Jared, he had been told the nurses were only allowed to share a patient’s information with family members. He had been devastated, fearing he would never see the man again.

“Alright, I’ll go and get the paperwork ready,” she beamed at the two of them and patted Jensen’s arm once more before slipping past Jared and out of the room.

“Hey,” Jared stepped into the room, taking the few steps his long stride required to rest at Jensen’s bedside.

“Hey,” Jensen breathed out, reaching out for Jared’s hand. “I didn’t think… I mean… how are you?”

“Bruised and beat up. Nothing new, really,” Jared laughed, all the while squeezing Jensen’s hand gently. “I hope you don’t mind my offer to take you home… I know you had mentioned you just moved up here. And I may or may not have been stalking around the waiting room to try and overhear the nurses’ conversations to see what was going on with you. Is that too creepy?”

“It’s a bit creepy,” Jensen nodded, chuckling. “I asked about you too, you know. They wouldn’t give me any information.”

“Do you already have a place around here where you’re supposed to be staying?” Jared sank down on the side of the bed and Jensen shifted his leg over to give Jared the room he needed. A shiver went through him as Jared rubbed small circles with his thumb across the back of Jensen’s hand, the action done completely absent-mindedly as Jared was speaking.

“No,” Jensen shook his head. “Once we got to the station in Oxbow I was planning on getting a rental and driving the rest of the way to Ashland…”

“Well, you’re more than welcome to come to my place in Oxbow, if you want,” Jared offered, shrugging nonchalantly, though Jensen could feel his body tense against the mattress and the circling on his hand stilled.

“I would appreciate that,” Jensen replied softly, squeezing his hand again. “I was planning on getting a hotel in Ashland anyways, I didn’t really think the whole… getting a job or place to live thing through…. I kind of just… packed up and left.”

“Well,” Jared started and then smiled, large dimples that Jensen hadn’t noticed before, flashing. “You really didn’t think this through at all, did you?”

Jensen punched his shoulder and found himself laughing along with Jared, feeling freer than he had in months despite being stuck in a hospital bed. They waited for the nurse to come back to the room with the required paperwork and passed the time talking about Jared’s company and what he had learned about their rescue.

“I guess my guys were concerned when I didn’t call like I was supposed to when the bus got to Oxbow… Apparently the bus company just assumed we were running late because of the snow and hadn’t reported anything yet. My guys called the bus station a few times before they finally got annoyed enough to try and radio our bus themselves. When there was no answer, they put things into motion and the authorities figured out the bus had gone off the road.”

Jensen nodded, listening as Jared explained how the Fish and Game officers had been the only ones able to get down to the bus by riding their snowmobiles and how Jared and Jensen must have ended up walking in circles for most of the day because the rock cliff they had taken shelter in had actually been part of a frontage road not far off the highway they had been driving on. “We were literally five hundred yards from the road,” Jared shook his head. “Can you believe that? About a third of a damned mile! God, I feel like such an idiot!”

“Well, we made it,” Jensen shrugged and gave Jared a smile. “That’s all that really matters, Jared. We were in whiteout conditions and neither of us could see a damned thing! So… Don’t beat yourself up too badly. You kept us alive in a near blizzard in 20 degree temps. That makes you pretty damned awesome by my standards.”

Jared nodded quietly, looking a bit embarrassed over Jensen’s praise and then leaned forward and pressed his lips against Jensen’s. His lips were warm and soft and Jensen found himself opening up, and kissing Jared back with everything he had.

“Thank you,” he whispered, breathing hard when they broke the kiss and pressing their foreheads together.

“For what?” Jensen breathed out, licking his lower lip and chasing the taste of Jared’s kiss.

“Really, Jen… I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had been all alone out there… I’m just… is it bad that I’m glad you were with me?” Jensen replied by kissing him again.



They drove the three hours to Jared’s house in comfortable silence, the sounds of the soft rock station soothing Jensen’s scattered thoughts as he watched the snowy forests and fields slide past them. A few times during the drive, snow started falling softly, and he could feel the car slowing and saw Jared’s hands clench the steering wheel a little tighter, his knuckles turning as white as the flakes outside.

Jensen shared the apprehension and fought the urge to reach out and take Jared’s hand in his own, knowing that distracting him in anyway would be less of a comfort and more of a stressor-for both of them.

When they finally reached Jared’s house, located on a small ranch with 15-acre plot of land, both of them relaxed instantly as the car came to a total stop. Turning off the engine Jared climbed out of the car and waited for Jensen to join him. They climbed the porch steps and walked to the front door together. He unlocked the door and pushed it open, motioning for Jensen to go in first.

“Through that doorway is the kitchen,” Jared was saying as he flicked on the lights. Jensen kicked off his boots before following Jared further into the house. “Bathroom is over there, and of course, this is the living room,” they moved together through the bottom floor, Jared pointing out different rooms and telling Jensen to make himself at home. They made their way upstairs and Jensen felt his stomach flip as Jared pushed open the first door.

“This is the guest room,” he motioned into the darkened room and then turned to the door directly across the hallway. “And this is my room…” the air between them became heavy and Jensen swallowed hard before stepping up and meeting Jared’s eyes. Jared’s hand was shaking slightly against the door knob, the soft rattle of the metal the only sound. Jensen cleared his throat and then leaned forward to press his lips close to Jared’s ear.

“I… seem to recall you promising to finish what we started, once we were home, showered, and safe…”

“I remember saying something about food too,” Jared swallowed, his voice breaking and Jensen opened his mouth to comment when Jared’s hands slipped around his waist, silencing him. Jensen placed his hands on Jared’s chest and pushed Jared backwards into the room. Jared moved quickly, pulling Jensen along with him until the back of his knees hit the bed and they tumbled down onto the mattress, their lips finding one another’s as they fell.

Jared felt good. He was warm and hard beneath him, the five o’clock shadow scratching against his chin as Jared kissed him, their mouths and tongues moving together. Jared’s teeth scraped against Jensen’s bottom lip, biting the flesh softly before slipping his tongue into Jensen’s open mouth, tongue pressing and claiming as it swept its way through. Jensen heard himself moan and Jared’s hands trailed down his back to grip his ass, grinding their hips together as he kissed him more deeply.

“Fuck, Jared,” Jensen whispered against his lips, gasping as Jared rolled them so he was hovering over Jensen’s body. Jared smirked and started kissing his way down Jensen’s neck, biting down gently on the exposed skin.

Jared took his time, slowly peeling away Jensen’s clothing, tasting and kissing every inch of skin he worked so hard to uncover. His hands trailed gently down Jensen’s sides and thighs, following the contours of his body, leaving a trail of heat wherever they touched. By the time Jensen was completely undressed, he was quivering in anticipation, his skin just as hot as Jared’s mouth trailing over him. Jared sat back on his heels, dropping the clothing he gripped in his hands to the floor and looked down at Jensen stripped bare before him.

“You’re so beautiful,” his voice was barely a whisper and Jensen exhaled sharply as he gazed upon Jared’s handsome face. The tall man’s pupils were almost fully dilated, his mouth slightly open, pink tongue running thoughtfully across his lower lip as his exotic-looking eyes drank in the sight of Jensen’s trim body.

“Are you just going to stare at me all day?” Jensen challenged in mild frustration, shifting on the bed and drawing Jared’s attention to his aching cock, curved and leaking against his stomach. Jared moaned softly and ran his hands back up Jensen’s thighs, pushing them open so he could plant his knee between them and lean back up to kiss Jensen’s lips.

“I could,” he smirked, pressing down against Jensen and making him gasp at the feeling of hard denim against his swollen flesh. “I could stare at you for hours… but I have something better in mind.”

“God, Jared, please…,” Jensen moaned into Jared’s mouth, his lips falling open as Jared’s tongue sought entrance. He slipped his tongue alongside Jared’s, fighting for dominance of the kiss. His hands trailed down Jared’s back, fingers digging into the corded muscles of his shoulders and arms as he brought the younger man closer, made the kiss deeper, and thrust his hips up hard against Jared’s.

Jared laughed softly, breaking their kiss to start licking his way back down Jensen’s body. He stopped at his chest, repeatedly teasing a nipple into a tight, hard peak with his tongue before slipping it between his teeth. Jensen gasped at the sharp pressure and then groaned as Jared’s tongue soothed away the hurt. Jared’s hands made their way down to Jensen’s hips, pinning him against the mattress as he worked his way to Jensen’s cock.

The drag of Jared’s stubble against the sensitive skin had Jensen crying out, pre-come oozing from the slit. Jared lapped at it, his tongue hot and wet against Jensen’s flesh. Jared’s fingers were digging into Jensen’s hips, massaging the muscle as he swallowed Jensen down, tongue working its way around Jensen’s shaft and slicking the way down his throat.

Jensen arched his hips, hands gripping the sheets underneath him and a deep, pleasured groan rolling past his lips. Around his cock, Jared laughed, the vibrations sending shocks up Jensen’s spine.

“You taste so good,” Jared whispered, pulling back to release Jensen. Cool air hit the spit slick skin, causing Jensen to shiver, despite the heat coursing through him. He looked down the length of his body and his breath caught in his throat as he saw Jared on his knees between Jensen’s thighs looking back up at him, pink tongue running along his lower lip once again, chasing the taste of his lover.

“Damn, Jared…” Jensen moaned and reached his hands forward, his fingers gently twisting into Jared’s hair as Jared sucked him back down. Jensen could feel his hips flexing under Jared’s ministrations, his talented mouth working at bringing Jensen right up to the edge before suddenly backing off, a wicked chuckle once again in his throat.

Jared slipped off slowly, trailing kisses back up Jensen’s stomach and chest until they were flush against each other once again and Jared could reach easily into the night stand. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since that night,” Jared whispered, breathing hot against his ear. “I can admit it now… I didn’t suggest taking off half your clothes only to help keep you warm, you know.” Jensen burst out laughing, shoving at Jared’s shoulder playfully. Jared kissed him deeply, placing the bottle of lube and condom he got from the drawer on the bed beside them.

“Oh yeah, shivering and bleeding, that sure was sexy as hell,” Jensen smiled against Jared’s lips, letting him pull back to meet his eyes.

“Even so,” Jared’s voice was soft and something flashed in his eyes that had Jensen’s stomach flipping. Before he could decipher it fully, however, it was gone and Jared had moved away to sit back on his heels once more, slowly pulling off his clothing piece by piece, smirking as Jensen watched the entire show.

Although Jensen had felt nearly every inch of Jared’s bare arms and chest that night in their shelter, seeing him now, in full light, had Jensen choking on the air he was trying to breathe. Jared smirked and Jensen was sure he was flexing his muscles just for his benefit. Jensen licked his lower lip and trailed his eyes down, watching as Jared slowly freed himself from his jeans until he was completely naked and crawling up over Jensen again.

“Jared,” Jensen breathed out against Jared’s lips when the other man claimed his again, their bodies completely flush against one another, chest to chest, hips to hips. Jared’s cock was thick, long and hot and digging almost painfully against the jut of Jensen’s hip and Jensen was sure he had never wanted anyone so badly in all of his life.

“I’m going to open you up nice and slow,” Jared’s breath was hot against his ear, his fingers skating down Jensen’s sides until they slipped under Jensen’s body and dug into the globes of his ass. “I’m going to push you to the edge with just my fingers inside of you. Then I want you to ride me, Jensen, I want to see you take my entire cock and ride it. What do you think about that?” He clenched his fingers, pulling Jensen’s ass cheeks apart for emphasis, his mouth kissing and nipping down the side of Jensen’s throat.

“Fuck, yes, Jared,” Jensen bucked his hips up and he could feel Jared smirking against his skin. Jared’s hands were suddenly gone as the man moved back and reached beside them for the bottle of lubricant. He popped the cap open, the sound sending a jolt through Jensen’s body as he anticipated what was coming next. He let his legs fall open and Jared was immediately there, a slicked up finger slowly sinking into the tight heat and they groaned in unison.

Jared kept his word, moving excruciatingly slow as he worked his finger in and out of Jensen’s body, pressing and twisting while his mouth worked its way across Jensen’s chest, licking and nipping and marking any bit of flesh he could with bright red marks. Jensen looked down his body, Jared’s fingers working between his legs and his chest flushed with Jared’s bites, and he groaned. He knew that in a few hours, the marks would disappear but seeing them there on his skin now? Had his cock twitching and his heart racing.

Jared added a second finger, scissoring and twisting them. He slipped further down Jensen’s body and slipped his mouth back over Jensen’s cock, moaning at the taste. Jensen fisted the sheets and forced himself not to buck up into the wet heat of Jared’s mouth. When the pads of Jared’s fingers brushed against the bundle of nerves deep inside, Jensen lost all control and jerked up with a gasp.

“You’re so fucking sexy, Jensen,” Jared whispered, pressing his chin against Jensen’s hip so he could look up Jensen’s body. Jensen met his eyes and shuddered at the look he saw there. Slowly, Jared added a third finger and together they watched as Jared moved them in and out, slow and teasing, until Jensen swore out loud that he thought he was going to die.

Jared laughed and pulled back, reaching for the condom and sheathing his own length before lying down on his back and reaching for Jensen. Later, Jensen would be embarrassed at the way he had scrambled up to his knees and blanketed himself over Jared’s body, claiming the other man’s mouth with his own and taking back control. But now, Jensen didn’t care about anything except for sinking down and making them move as one.

“Jensen!” Jared’s voice broke as Jensen moved up high onto his knees, positioned himself and then slowly lowered his body down onto Jared’s cock, his hands pressed flat against Jared’s stomach for leverage. Jared’s hands flew up, one gripping Jensen’s hip and the other digging into his thigh. Jensen groaned, throwing his head back at the too-full feeling of having Jared buried deep inside of him.

Jared pressed his feet into the mattress, his knees rising and shifting Jensen’s hips and rocking him forward. Jensen moaned and reached back for Jared’s knee, using it to lift himself up before slamming back down again. Jared let out a keening sound that had Jensen’s heart shattering and he wanted nothing more than to hear Jared make that sound again. His eyes trailed over the fine sheen of sweat across Jared’s chest and stomach, the tall man’s hair splayed out across the pillow and exposing every inch of his face, allowing Jensen to see every expression that passed over it.

He rocked his hips forward, sliding his body up and down Jared’s length, his own cock bouncing against his stomach with each bob of his hips. Jared’s hand trailed up Jensen’s thigh and long fingers wrapped around his dick, both men moving in unison and working in a seamless rhythm. Jensen wasn’t sure if he was the one moaning or if it was Jared, but the sound of their flesh moving against one another and the feeling of Jared’s hands and body surrounding him, had Jensen falling apart.

“Jared….damn… Harder!” he cried and Jared shifted his hips, bucking up to meet each one of Jensen’s downward thrusts, as sparks of pleasure were dancing their way through Jensen’s lower body.

“Yeah, fuck… just like that, Jensen,” Jared moaned, his grip tightening as he slid his palm over the head of Jensen’s dick before jacking back down in time with the roll of Jensen’s hips. “You look so fucking hot, Jensen, feel so fucking good. Come on Jensen, come for me baby.”

“Unngh!” Jensen moaned, the sound rolling from deep inside of his chest. Jared’s large, slick fist slid over him once more and he came with a shout, spilling hot and white between them, covering Jared’s chest with his release. Jared’s eyes rolled back at the sight and he followed only seconds later, his hips stuttering in their final journey upwards and his hand releasing Jensen’s twitching dick to grip his hips tightly and keep them joined together.

When Jared collapsed back into the mattress, Jensen followed, not caring about the sweat or come that was now sandwiched between them. His chest was rising and falling in time with Jared’s, his head felt light and fuzzy, and he shivered when Jared’s arms moved to wrap around his body and hold them closer together.

Jared kissed his face and his throat softly, the thoughtful, nearly reverent press of his lips against Jensen’s sweaty skin had Jensen trembling in his arms. It was a move so unnecessary and yet, so perfect that Jensen never wanted to let this go.



“What are you saying?” Jensen winced as his mother’s voice broke across the phone, panic clear in her voice. He could vaguely hear his father questioning her in the background and he hurried on, hoping that his wouldn’t turn into one of those conversations.

“There was a bus accident…” he started again, picking at a worn stitch on the steering wheel of his rental car. He was parked before the Dalton Inn, Bed and Breakfast, the only hotel he could find in Ashland. The couple was nice, from what he had already experienced, and were quick to make sure he was settled comfortably in his room after showing him where he could find the kitchen and common areas. He smiled and thanked them and escaped to the car as soon as he could to get this phone call done and over with.

“Jensen Ross! I heard that part! What I don’t understand is why this is the first time I’ve heard of it!”

“I just… had a lot of things I had to deal with. I’m fine, Mom. And you can let Dad know too before he blows a gasket.” He could hear both his father’s voice and tone rising in the background and sighed as he leaned back against the seat. He quickly explained the crash, leaving out most of the details of how he and Jared had wandered around in the snow half the night, and reassured his mother, again, that he was fine. His shoulder was fine and his cut was healing and he was fine.

“Maybe you should just come home…” her voice was a whisper, but Jensen could hear her just fine over the phone line. His heart sank and he sighed.

“I’ll be home for Easter,” he offered and returned to picking at the thread. “I’m beat though… I did a lot of driving today. I’m going to head inside and unpack but I’ll call you and Dad tomorrow, okay?” He ended the call and placed the phone on his thigh, staring at the darkening screen.

He had spent over a week at Jared’s house, getting to know the other man both in the bedroom and out. Jared had managed to take time off from work due to their wilderness experience, but when Jared had mentioned needing to go out on location… Jensen knew it was time. He had shrugged his shoulders, acted like he was ready anyways, and worked on packing up the things that he had managed to have scattered in every single room of the house.

Jared had made love to him that night, slow and silent and they had fallen asleep wrapped up in each other’s arms. Or, Jared had anyways. Jensen couldn’t sleep. Jared was once against curled up against his chest as he had been in their cave, his breath hot and damp against Jensen’s bare skin, and Jensen was surprised when he started struggling to breathe.

His heart caught in his throat, choking him as he watched the beautiful man sleep. Jared‘s eyelids flickered in the dim light from the hallway and Jensen hoped that whatever he was dreaming of was beautiful and perfect, just like Jared himself was. Jensen had closed his eyes, tried to force himself to sleep, but couldn’t stop thinking that tomorrow he would be walking away from something worth having.

Now, almost three hours away from where Jared was probably just getting home from work, Jensen felt an ache deep in his bones. He had spent a week attached to Jared - laughing with him, eating with him, talking with him and… falling in love with him. It was crazy, really and truly crazy, but Jensen felt the realization like a punch to the gut.

Maybe it was because of the crash, being thrown together in a life or death situation. Maybe it was impossible to nearly freeze to death and be forced to entrust your life and ability to survive to a stranger you had only just met without falling in love with that person when you accomplished that nearly impossible feat together. Jensen didn’t know, and he wasn’t too keen on testing the theory. All he really knew was that when he walked into the room they had given him at the inn, the large queen-sized bed was already icy and cold, reminding him that he was truly alone.

Sighing, Jensen pushed himself back out of the car and made his way back into the lovely old house. He smiled at the inn keepers, agreed that he would join them for dinner, and made his way to his room. He left the lights off and his clothes on and moved to lie on top of the bedclothes. He shivered against the chill in the room but closed his eyes and waited for darkness to take him.



Jared: Yeah, I miss you too.

Jensen stared at the text message, his heart beating wildly in his chest. It had been two months since the accident and almost as long since he had physically seen Jared.

He was still living at the Inn, but had found a job at the local school working in the office as an accounting manager-secretary… thingy. He wasn’t actually sure what his job title was; the small town school had more positions open then they had people, and Jensen had allowed them to pile on responsibility after responsibility - anything to help pass the time. But it got him out of the inn early enough in the morning that he wasn’t sleeping his days away and gave him enough work to do on the laptop he was given to keep him busy at the inn before bed.

Jared had started to text him; snap shooting pictures of the locations he was on… a selfie of his joyful grin when he got permission to expand his business into Oxbow… quick snaps of a beer or three when Jared was feeling particularly lonely. It was those last ‘sort of lonely’ messages that had Jensen’s heart twisting in his chest, Jared’s words from the cave ringing in his head, ‘I have companionship; people that I know will have my back and sometimes I can score great sex with no attachments.’

Jensen spent those nights picturing Jared wrapped around an attractive blonde or brunette that he had picked up at the bar after he was finished texting Jensen. His stomach rolled painfully and he forced himself to flick off the phone, to resist the urge to text Jared and ask him. He really didn’t want to know the answer.

But today… Jensen had sent Jared a picture of the new, thick gloves he found in his room, a thoughtful gift given to him by the inn keepers. He told Jared that they made him think of that freezing night in the wilderness, how he wished he had them on that night, and wanted to know if Jared had managed to get better gloves for himself now that he was out on location so often, getting everything settled.

Then Jared texted him that. Without even thinking, Jensen was up and moving. School had been released early that day and Friday was a free-day due to teacher workshops. Since Jensen didn’t actually teach anything, he was just as free as the students. He barely registered what he was doing as he packed a few things into a backpack, rushed down the stairs and waved to the innkeepers and other patrons in the dining room, hurriedly telling them he would be back by Monday. He had slipped behind the wheel of the car and was driving out of town and back onto the high way, back to Oxbow and to Jared.

Now, Jensen’s hands gripped the steering wheel tightly. He had made it all the way to Oxbow and driven up Jared’s long driveway but hadn’t managed to put the car in park. Instead, he sat idling behind Jared’s car. He knew Jared was home, knew that if he glanced out the front window he would see Jensen sitting in the driveway looking like an idiot. And suddenly Jensen realized that maybe he was fooling himself, maybe this was all a monumental mistake… he hadn’t been thinking this through at all...

But he couldn’t deny the feelings he harbored for the man. Couldn’t deny the way his body ached at being apart from him or the way his mind was constantly making excuses to twist his thoughts so that anything and everything somehow reminded him of Jared. Couldn’t deny the way his heart skipped a beat as he had read those three simple words on his phone.

He wasn’t even sure what he was doing here. Jared had been clear in the cave, had mentioned it a few times in the week they’d spent together how against relationships he was, and Jensen couldn’t love him; it would be ridiculous. Jensen inhaled sharply as the realization hit him in the gut. He was falling for Jared, easily. Hell, he had been all along. And his stupid heart was clouding his mind, giving him hope that maybe… just maybe Jared was feeling just a little something for him as well. Wasn’t that what motivated him to drive all the way back to Oxbow without thinking of the consequences of showing up on Jared’s doorstep unannounced?

Exhaling slowly, Jensen knew he had to get out of the car. He threw the car into park and turned off the ignition, dropping the keys into the center console. Step one, down.

Jensen’s hands were shaking as he reached for the door handle. Although it felt like he was moving through thick sludge, ice slowly climbing back through his limbs and weighing him down, he was standing at Jared’s door much sooner than he was ready for. He raised his hand to knock, and then held his breath.

“Jensen?” Jared opened the door, his eyes wide with shock as a smile appeared on his lips. “What… what are you doing here?”

“I… I…” Jensen faltered, his lips tried to move but nothing was coming out. It wasn’t like he could say, ‘you said you missed me and I haven’t been able to breathe properly since I left you’.

“Come in,” Jared smiled and reached for his hand, pulling him over the threshold and into his arms. Jensen felt himself relax into the embrace; Jared’s arms felt strong, safe and sure. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just… wanted to see you,” Jensen stammered quickly and watched as Jared shut the door behind them and made his way into the kitchen, with Jensen trailing after him feeling like a pathetic lost puppy.

“I was just making some chili,” Jared said, waving his arm towards a large pot bubbling away on the stove. “Hungry?”

“Yeah,” Jensen nodded and slipped onto one of the barstools, watching as Jared reached up for an extra bowl, his shirt riding up and exposing a beautiful strip of muscular flesh. Jensen steeled himself and closed his eyes. “Jared?” He was pleased his voice sounded steadier than how he was feeling inside.

“Yeah?” Jared tossed a glance over his shoulder and stilled when he saw the expression on Jensen’s face. Slowly, he placed the bowls on the counter and made his way to the dining island, leaning against it and studying Jensen’s face carefully.

“I want…” Jensen sighed, closing his eyes for a moment to collect his thoughts.

“Jensen, you’re scaring me,” Jared reached for Jensen’s arm, his long, calloused fingers wrapping around his forearm.

“Jared, I miss you. I can’t stop thinking about you,” the words gushed from Jensen’s lips.

Jared pulled his hand back as if Jensen’s arm was on fire, his eyes wide as he stared at Jensen.

But Jensen had already started, his words hanging thickly in the space between them, and there was no pulling them back now. “All the time, Jared… I think about you all the time. I end up texting you every morning when I wake up, I wait for your replies like they’re my life line. When people ask me about the accident, I talk about you and how brave and strong and handsome you are. I think of the week I spent here and how… how I can’t remember being that happy in so long. So fucking long…”

“What do you want from me, Jensen?” Jared’s voice was a mere whisper, his eyes flashing with something Jensen couldn’t decipher.

“I want you, Jared, I want a real relationship with you,” he licked his lower lip and shook his head quickly when Jared opened his mouth to argue. “I know… I know you don’t do relationships... I know you’re afraid of them, or wary of them, or whatever... but I want to try, Jared. You can’t deny this, what’s between us. I think it’s worth it, to try I mean. What could go wrong, Jared? What are you really afraid of?” Jensen felt his cheeks heat up at the pleading in his voice, and his eyes trailed up slowly, flicking across Jared’s face to watch the multitude of feelings cross his features.

“What could go wrong?!” Jared repeated in disbelief, pushing away from the island and running a hand through his hair. He spun back around to stare momentarily dumbstruck at Jensen, his lower lip caught between his teeth as if he were afraid to speak. He exhaled and then laughed, the sound both harsh and loud, making Jensen jump in his seat.

“What could go wrong, Jensen? Everything, everything could go wrong. Right now, I enjoy your company. I like having you around. The sex is fantastic. But… all of that could change in an instant.” Jared shook his head again, his expression pleading with Jensen to understand. “Stupid, stupid things could ruin this. We could fight over dirty dishes, over who gets the left side of the bed and who gets the right side of the sink. Should we have kids? Or dogs? Both or neither? We would have a mortgage and electric bills, oil to buy, groceries and… and… fighting about money and sex and life all the time. Fighting until we don’t recognize ourselves anymore and we hate each other for it. Relationships aren’t real, Jensen, they don’t work. Please…”

“What if they don’t work because you haven’t found the right person?” Jensen interrupted him, but Jared only shook his head, his eyes squeezing shut. He looked pained and Jensen felt his heart clench knowing he was the reason for it. He swallowed hard, exhaled slowly. Then, “I’ll wash the dishes, if you’ll dry them,” Jensen whispered, waiting for Jared to blink his eyes open and look at him again. “You can have the left side of the bed, and the left sink to match it.”

“Jensen…” Jared murmured, but Jensen only continued.

“I love kids and I love dogs, and if you want them? We will have them. But if you don’t…? We both have brothers and sisters who will have nieces and nephews for me to spoil rotten. There will be a mortgage and all of the bills that go along with it, and arguments and disagreements and even some fighting...” Jensen pushed down off the stool and made his way around the island, slowly reaching for Jared and smiling when Jared let him. “I may end up sleeping on the couch a few times, and sometimes you’ll come and join me there. But, Jared, there will also be love and agreements and so much passion...and great make-up sex!” he paused to catch a breath. “I don’t even recognize myself anymore, Jared. Not since the accident. And I’m glad for that because I don’t think that other ‘me’ ever would have survived and realized what he needed to see.”

“And what’s that?” Jared squeezed Jensen’s hands, looking down to meet Jensen’s eyes.

“That I’m falling in love with you,” Jensen felt the shock that Jared’s face showed at the words being said aloud, but he knew they were true. “Relationships… they are real. They’re hard and messy and a lot of work. But they’re real and they’re life and they’re part of living, Jared.”

Jared leaned forward, pressing his forehead against Jensen’s, his eyes squeezing shut again. Jensen held his breath, his hands shaking in Jared’s grasp. Jared let out a shaky breath and pulled away and out of Jensen’s reach, turning to lean over the sink with his back to Jensen.

Jensen felt the rejection wash through him. The pain he had felt in his limbs out in the snow that night was nothing compared to the pain he felt searing through his body now. He felt tears forming at the back of his eyes, leaving him exposed and empty and cold. Jared’s head was bowed, defeated…and now Jensen felt exactly the same.

Slowly, he turned on his heel and strode dejectedly towards the door. Jared’s silence was enough. He let himself out of the house and nearly tripped down the steps as he ran to his car. He opened the door and threw himself into the seat, his hands shaking violently as he fumbled for his keys. Hot tears blinded his vision as he struggled to fit the key in the ignition. This entire journey had been one huge mistake; he never should have gotten in the car and driven here. He had managed to ruin what little they had by pushing, pushing when he knew… he knew how Jared felt… His car door was suddenly ripped open and he gasped, turning to see Jared, panting hard and leaning against the door, staring at him through fearful eyes.

“I’m scared,” Jared’s voice was wrecked, thick with emotion and Jensen felt his heart skip a few beats. “I’m terrified of getting hurt. I have never felt this way about anyone before, Jensen. I’ve never let myself. I can’t… I don’t…” Jensen moved quickly, pushing himself back out of the car and into Jared’s arms. He didn’t think he could breathe the truth and promise and hope in Jared’s words choking him.

“We will figure it out Jared, we will figure it out together,” Jensen reached up to grip Jared’s jaw, turning his face towards him. “I can’t promise you that it’s going to be easy, or that we won’t end up being hurt at some point. But I can promise you I won’t hurt you on purpose and that I will work every day on this relationship with you to make it everything it needs to be, for both of us.”

“Sounds like a damned Lifetime movie,” Jared whispered, giving Jensen a small, wet smile. Jensen laughed and leaned forward, capturing Jared’s lips in a soft kiss.

“I need to know, Jared…” his voice was hushed, nearly swallowed by Jared’s lips as the taller man kissed him back.

“Yes, Jensen,” Jared nodded, tightening his arms around Jensen’s back. “For you, I’ll try… yes.”

Jensen laughed, the sound happy and free and let Jared lead him back into the house. They made their way upstairs, peeling off layers of clothing that left a trail in their wake all the way to the bedroom. Jensen whispered promises against Jared’s skin, telling the other man how beautiful he was, inside and out, how much he had come to depend on and trust Jared in their short time together.

“Jesus, Jensen,” Jared groaned, throwing his head back as Jensen kitten-licked his way down Jared’s cock, his fingernails scraping along Jared’s sides and causing the other man to shiver. When Jensen pulled back up and moved to capture Jared’s lips, he was surprised to see the tearful expression on Jared’s face.

“Jared?” He whispered, panic fluttering through his stomach as he searched Jared’s eyes. Jared simply shook his head, his hand cupping Jensen’s cheek and pulling him in for a soft kiss.

“That night… I knew that night in the woods, that you were changing me,” he whispered, thumb stroking across Jensen’s cheek. “You crashed into me, Jensen. You turned my entire world upside down.”

“I love you,” Jensen’s voice was hushed, Jared’s breathing hitched as he searched Jensen’s eyes, terrified and wide. He swallowed hard and nodded once, a small smile on his lips.

“I love you too, Jensen.”

Jensen fused their mouths together again, he couldn’t tell where he ended and where Jared began. Their collective gasps and moans were the only sounds that could be heard from the upstairs as Jared rocked into Jensen, claiming and marking him as his own. Jensen came with Jared’s name on his lips, seconds after Jared climaxed inside of him, and when they collapsed back onto the mattress, sated and breathing hard, Jared broke the silence, a smile in his voice.

“Jensen?”

“Hmmm?” Jensen curled against Jared’s side, his fingertips trailing small circles over his stomach.

“I want the right side of the bed...”

Jensen laughed and pushed up on his elbow to find Jared’s lips.

“Deal,” he smiled and let himself be pulled into sleep, Jared’s arms wrapped tightly around him. He was warm, safe, and finally, truly happy.

Closing Notes: This fic was so much fun to write. It was a WIP that I had left, dusty and forgotten, only outlining the crash scene and once I chose it for wipbigbang I got the mojo back and I'm very proud I finished it. There are way too many half, thought-out fics in my folders that need some brushing up on!

Also, don't forget to look at amberdreams art master post and let her know how truly gorgeous and amazing her art is! I am so blessed she picked my fic because, seriously, how lucky was I?!