(no subject)
Title: Picture the Two of Us Alone Inside My Golden Submarine [1/2]
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles, Danneel Harris/Riley Smith, mentions of some others
Rating: Hard R.
Warnings: Adopted brother-cest, Jonny-Quest situations.
Word Count: 11500.
Summary: Jensen's got a good life--taken in by a rich and famous globe-trotting scientist, bound for grad school at Harvard--and then he goes and falls for his adopted brother.
Notes: Written for dawnstarrising for Sweet Charity. She happened to give me free reign during a time when I was like I REALLY WANT TO WRITE A J2 JONNY QUEST AU and said I could do that. So I hope she enjoys it as much as I enjoy incoherent Saturday morning cartoons. Title from Jonathan Coulton.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
"Dude," says Jared, grinning over the top of Jensen's laptop, "you have got to try this."
Jensen raises his eyebrows, eyes flicking back down to the screen. "I think words mean different things in your world."
"Which ones?" asks Jared.
"'Got to,' mostly."
Jared snorts. "Live a little, seriously. This thing is awesome."
Jensen knows the hoverboard is awesome. He spent all of last month carefully calibrating it to make sure it was completely and totally perfect. And fun as hell. He's not sure if Jared knows that, but he's not going to tell him. He kind of likes Jared's belief that Jensen does absolutely nothing interesting now that he's gone to college. It's hilarious. "I've got work."
Jared waves his hand. "Work, schmerk. Race me."
"Work schmerk?" asks Jensen. "What are you, twelve?"
Jared grins, big and cocky, dimples flashing, and Jensen kind of wishes he was twelve. Everything had been a lot easier back then, when he and Jared and Danneel were running around like hooligans, nearly getting killed every other week. When Jared was short and hyper and seemed a lot more like a kid.
Yeah, Jensen misses that a lot.
"Fuck you, man. Is Danny around? She always races me."
Jensen resolutely keeps his eyes on the laptop. Jared's crush on Danneel was easier then to, before Danneel might have taken him seriously.
Not that she seems to have started doing it yet. But it's only a matter of time.
"Think she's on a date," he says truthfully.
Jared lets out a huff of breath. "Again? Is it the same guy?"
"Riley or something," says Jensen absently. In fact, he knows exactly who it is; Riley Smith, age 22, just graduated Bowdoin. Jeff had him track down the guy's info, because Jeff takes protective father to inspirational new levels. Jensen is torn between being terrified of him and being in awe of him.
Jared sighs. "Why didn't you ever?" he asks, disentangling his feet from the hoverboard as he flops down on the couch, evidently giving up on his quest to make Jensen race him.
"Why didn't I ever what?"
"You and Danny. She was crazy about you, man."
Jensen laughs. "She's hot, dude, but I'm not sure there's a girl in the world hot enough to risk the wrath of Jeff. And the wrath of you."
"But we like you," Jared points out.
Jensen hasn't exactly come out to Jared yet. He hasn't actually come out to anyone yet, to be honest--Danneel figured it out his freshman year when she came for a campus visit and guessed that he and his then-boyfriend weren't totally platonic, but she's the only one in the family who knows he's interested in guys at all.
He stretches. "We tried it."
Jared jolts up. "What? When? What?"
"Right before I went to college, I guess. Remember me and Danny went to Costa Rica with her mom and you and your dad were checking out swamps?"
"Ugh," says Jared. "I still feel dirty from that."
Jensen laughs. "It was that summer," he admits.
Jared sobers immediately. "And you didn't tell me?"
"It was about a week, Jared. We figured out we're a lot better friends and decided to never mention it again."
Jared shakes his head. "Fuck, Jensen. I can't believe you--how could you be better friends?"
"We're awesome friends," says Jensen. Sometimes he feels like the only one who understands this. Or felt like it, anyway. Back before college, Jared was always following Danneel around like a lost puppy--okay, that's not totally fair, but still, totally crushing on her--and Danneel had a stupid thing for Jensen, and Jensen thought they were both his best friends and nothing could ever beat that. He thought he was the smart one, the one who wasn't getting involved in the stupid hormone shit.
Then, of course, while Jensen was away at college Jared grew five feet and got the best smile Jensen has ever seen, and now Jensen is not nearly as above it as he'd like. Whatever happened to brotherly love?
"Yeah, but--" Jared shakes his head and laughs. "You think she'd ever go for me?"
Jensen shrugs, pushing the laptop away and giving up. "You're kind of like a brother to her, Jared."
Jared huffs. "You guys are always saying that. But you're not like siblings for me."
Jensen stiffens, just a little, even though he's stupidly glad to hear it. Fucking crush.
"No, god, man--Jensen!" says Jared, looking aghast. "God, not like that. I mean--you and Danny are my best friends, and you're family, and I love you guys more than anything, but--"
"But not like it'd be creepy if you hooked up with Danny," Jensen supplies, smiling a little.
Jared smiles back. "Yeah." He pats the couch. "You're not even typing. Get over here and hang out with me, college boy."
Jensen hauls himself out of his chair and sits next to Jared on the couch.
"Seriously, it's been a week and I feel like I've barely seen you. You graduated, you aren't supposed to be working."
He laughs. "I've still got grad school."
"Nerd," Jared retorts fondly.
"Says the guy who's going to MIT."
"Apparently my dad's got an in or something."
Jensen is pretty sure there's no school in the country Dr. Padalecki doesn't have an in at. But Jared's smart as hell too, no doubt about it.
Jared ducks his head suddenly. "I noticed you're avoiding me, you know," he admits.
And Jensen has to feel a little bad, because it's been a week, and he's spent the whole time trying to ignore the way Jared makes him feel.
Jensen had resisted high school--he'd been a shy kid, beyond shy. For a long time after Dr. Padalecki adopted him, Jared was the only one who could get him out of his shell at all, so the idea of being stuck in one place away from the only family he'd even known? Not working for him. Danneel had gone off to some girls' school and Jensen and Jared had stayed with Dr. Padalecki and Jeff, getting a rag-tag education. But it turns out you can't actually get home-schooled and come out with a BA, so he'd ended up going to Yale, and Jared ended up going to private school, and between Dr. Padalecki's globetrotting and Jensen's internships and spring break trips, they barely saw each other for four years.
Jared's growth spurt had, apparently, hit somewhere around sixteen, and the kid had shot up even taller than Jensen and gotten a lot of muscle mass from training with Jeff regularly. Jensen had barely recognized him at graduation, and nearly fell over when he put together the sharp burst of attraction with Jared.
So he hasn't been spending as much time with Jared as he should have, because he's feeling guilty as fuck. Danneel, of course, noticed, and told him he was a fucking dumbass.
Par for the course, really.
"It's Harvard, Jared," he says finally. "It's stressful."
"And you're Dr. Gerald Padalecki's boy prodigy."
"No, that's you, dumbass."
Jared laughs. "You're the one who's getting published."
Jensen flushes. His thesis is actually becoming a book, which is fucking amazing.
"We should go see a movie or something," says Jared, tapping his foot against the arm of the couch. "Do something fun."
"You're seventeen. Your idea of fun is supposed to be way dirtier."
"You're prematurely old," says Jared, "I figure you forgot what fun is."
Jared's baiting him, and Jensen knows it.
"So what's fun for you?" asks Jensen. He's trying to sound as unflirty as possible.
Jared grins wide, and Jensen knows he's not going to say no.
*
"What did you do last night?" asks Danneel with a smirk when Jensen staggers downstairs the next morning, feeling crappy and ashamed. He's a college graduate; a seventeen-year-old kid should not be drinking him under the table. He's not even sure where Jared found the booze. He's too famous for a fake ID to work.
"If you say anything to Dr. Padalecki, I'm going to tell your dad that your boyfriend smokes pot."
Danneel laughs, which is especially mean given how hungover he is. The sound echoes in his skull. "What am I going to do with you, Jensen?"
"Shoot me. Like they do with lame horses."
She sits down and puts her head on his shoulder. "I should've seen this coming."
"Me being an idiot? Yeah, no surprise there."
"You and Jared are going to get married and travel the world adopting underprivileged orphans and saving lives with science."
Jensen snorts.
"It's pretty much what you do now, you're just not married."
"I was the orphan," Jensen points out.
Danneel waves her hand. She looks a lot like Jared when she does it, which is weird. "So it's been a week. How does it feel being a graduate?"
"Pretty much the same," says Jensen. "I'm still going to be in school in September."
"Yeah, but at Harvard. That's a big deal. You guys make me feel so dumb."
"Quit fishing for compliments, Danny. You go to fucking Brown."
She smiles. "Oh, hey, question."
"What?"
"What do you think the odds are I can convince my dad Riley is responsible enough to take me on a roadtrip?"
"Depends. In your universe, has hell frozen over?"
She shoves him. "I'm serious!"
"So am I. Have you met your dad?"
"It's not that much worse than college," she points out. "Besides, him and Dr. Padalecki are leaving."
Jensen chokes on his coffee. "What? When?"
Danneel clucks her tongue. "A couple days?"
"Where are they going?"
"Tibet."
"Why?"
"The Dalai Lama has some kind of problem for Dr. Padalecki."
Jensen sighs. "Of course he does."
"If you weren't holed up in your room hiding from Jared you'd know about this stuff," Danneel points out.
Jensen groans. "So they're leaving and you want to leave?"
"Exactly."
"So me and Jared."
"For at least three weeks," Danneel confirms.
Jensen laughs. "Stay, seriously."
"I'd just get in the way of your keggers."
"Oh god, he's going to want to have keggers."
"He's a rising freshman, he needs practice."
"My gravestone is going to say 'Fuck you, Danneel Harris' on it."
"Drink your coffee."
*
"This is good work, Jensen," says Dr. Padalecki, glancing over his program. "Very impressive." He looks up and smiles. "Have you considered taking a break?"
Jensen can't keep a smile off his face. "I'm feeling a little conspired against."
"Trust me, you're going to work like a dog at graduate school, son. You should take the time to get some rest."
"I'm not very good at resting, Dr. Padalecki."
"I've noticed that. When's the thesis being published?"
"Sometime in the fall, I think," he says, not wanting to admit that he knows the exact date.
Dr. Padalecki nods, a dismissal. As Jensen leaves, he adds, "Oh, Jensen?"
"Yes?"
"You know Jeff and I are headed for Tibet the day after tomorrow?"
"Danny mentioned it," he admits.
"I hope you'll have stopped avoiding Jared by then."
Jensen flushes. "I'm starting to think you guys all talk about me behind my back."
Dr. Padalecki laughs. "Only sometimes. I thought the two of you would appreciate having some time together--it's been quite a while since you could hang out."
"I do," Jensen says, half-protest. "I was just--I wanted to finish this."
"Well, it looks like you're making good progress. Still," he smiled. "I wouldn't sacrifice your vacation for it."
Jensen can't help smiling back. "Got it."
*
It hits Jensen around two a.m. as he's checking his code over for what seems like the thousandth time: he's in love with Jared.
He never gets this worked up over attractive guys--sure, he likes them, maybe worries a bit that they might not be gay, but even the worst crushes he's ever had never tore him up like this. He told himself it was the familiarity, the weirdness of finding someone he was so close to hot, but it's not actually strange. Jared is his best friend--even after four years apart, somehow--and it feels almost like a puzzle fitting together, realizing how he feels. He and Jared have always been in-sync, and now--now Jensen might fuck it up.
He writes //emotions are balls// into his code, figuring anyone who knows enough comp sci to read it is bound to have serious issues with interpersonal relationships. Then he groans and leans back.
In love with Jared. It's not a surprise, it's just--it fucking figures.
Right on schedule, an IM window pops up.
Jared: you awake?
Me: No rest for the wicked
Jared: since when are you the wicked?
Me: Shut up, I'm busy.
Jared: I'm bored, come entertain me
Me: b-u-s-y.
Jared: when's it due?
Me: I told Prof Kripke I'd have something to show him by day after tomorrow
Jared: brb
Jensen leans back on the couch, stretches and cracks his shoulders. He did tell Kripke he'd send him the program, but it wasn't like Kripke cared that much when it came. He's graduated, and Kripke's on vacation somewhere tropical, probably not checking his e-mail. But Jensen's glad to have a deadline. Or an excuse.
He's not really that surprised when Jared flops down next to him on the couch and hands him a Coke. He groans.
"I'm trying to be nice," says Jared, knocking his knee against Jensen's.
"I want to sleep sometime tonight."
"So sleep," says Jared.
Jensen scowls. "Working."
Jared leans over and snorts. "Emotions are balls? You're working hard man."
"I'm tired, shut up."
"What's it do, anyway?" Jared asks, scanning quickly. "A.I.?"
"You're such a showoff," snorts Jensen. "Yeah. A.I."
"That's awesome, man." Jared grins, and Jensen's heart skips a beat. He's always loved Jared's smile, he's just never wanted to kiss it off his face before.
He manages a smile in return. "Yeah." He sighs and rubs the back of his neck. "I might have to give up for the night, though. My eyes are crossing."
Jared leans over and puts the laptop on the table.
"I'm not an invalid."
"You're a stubborn bitch," says Jared, ruffling Jensen's hair. He doesn't move his hand, though, just pulls Jensen's head so they're kind of--
"What are you doing?"
"Snuggling," says Jared cheerfully. Then, softer, "I missed you, man."
Jensen finds himself cuddling closer, leaning close to Jared. "Missed you too," he admits.
"Never could stay awake," says Jared fondly. "Remember when we went to Alaska and shared the tent? I wanted to stay up all night and have a real sleepover, but we were sharing the sleeping bag and you just passed out."
Jensen wants to respond, defend himself somehow, but he's seriously exhausted and Jared is warm and familiar and he really did miss the fuck out of him, and apparently Jared's right about his ability to stay awake.
*
Jensen gets up before Jared the next morning and disentangles himself with effort. His entire body hurts, because sleeping on a couch wrapped around Jared is not actually good for his body parts.
Even if it's really nice.
Jensen is trying not to read too much into this. Jared's always been pretty touchy, and he gave Jensen a much smaller hug than he clearly wanted to when they first saw each other at graduation (Jensen assumes it was because he was looking so shocked), so Jared probably felt like he needed some more contact or something. That's gotta be it.
He makes it down to the kitchen where Jeff and Danneel are having breakfast without seeing Jared again, a win.
"Morning, sleepyhead," says Danneel.
"Hey, Jensen."
Jensen cracks every part of his body he can. It's a lot. "Morning."
"Rough night?" asks Danneel.
"I shouldn't sleep on couches anymore," he says.
"Your bed not good enough for you anymore?" asks Jeff, raising his eyebrows.
"Accident," says Jensen.
Right then, naturally, Jared tromps down the stairs and comes in from the same direction. Danneel clearly connects the dots and grins at Jensen, who looks down.
"Hey guys!" says Jared, knocking his shoulder against Jensen's. "We got coffee?"
"Pour your own, lazy ass," says Jensen, holding his own mug close.
"Meanie," says Jared, sticking his tongue out.
"Hey, wait," says Danneel. "You should ask Jared and Jensen."
"Because they never take your side on anything," says Jeff, smirking. "But all right. Boys, we're having a family debate. Danny thinks she's old enough to go cross-country with a boy."
"To Chicago. For a vacation. We just happen to be driving," says Danneel, rolling her eyes.
Jensen glances sideways at Jared to see signs of jealousy, but his jaw is set, giving nothing away.
"You're not old enough," says Jeff.
"I'm twenty-one," she points out. "If I'm not old enough now, when will be?"
"I don't like you going off alone. Maybe if Jared and Jensen--"
"Whoa," says Jared, putting his hands up in front of him. "Danny could take either of us in a fight. I'm not sure what we'd add to the trip."
"Two third wheels," says Jensen.
"Exactly," Jared agrees.
"I don't see how it's worse than me being at college," Danneel points out. "I didn't have anyone else there either and I was fine."
"What about sophomore year?" says Jeff.
Jensen and Jared exchange a look. Harris family arguments are always really, really awkward.
"One guy! The lamest attempt at kidnapping I've ever seen. And I beat the shit out of him," says Danneel.
"I just worry."
"Jensen," she says, turning to him. "What do you think?"
"I think you can take care of yourself," says Jensen firmly. "And you have been for at least three years."
"Longer with boarding school," Jared points out.
Jeff glares at both of them. "Jared, you're supposed to be on my side."
"Sorry, Jeff, the little bird's gotta leave the nest sometime."
"You know I'm three years older than you, right?" asks Danneel, laughing.
"Yeah," agree Jared, slinging an arm around her, "but to Jeff? You're always gonna be five years old."
"Not helping my case, jerk," says Danneel, elbowing Jared in the ribs.
"What did Dr. Padalecki say?" asks Jensen.
Jeff slumps. "It's four against one," he admits.
"I can take care of myself," Danneel states. "I'll have a tracker on at all times. Just--seriously, dad."
Jeff lets out a long sigh. "You really think Jared and Jensen are going to be okay if you leave them alone?"
"Us?" asks Jared, beaming. "What could possibly go wrong?"
*
Jensen finishes his code around when Danneel packs up and leaves, which works out pretty well. He's not really okay ignoring Jared when there's no one around to pay attention to him anyway, so the timing's good.
For about three days, they're almost like they were before. Jensen's never really felt the four-year difference between them, which he knows should be weird, but Jared was all he had for a long time, and the kid's smart beyond his years anyway. They fall back together almost effortlessly, racing hoverboards around the compound, testing out video games Jensen helped program in college, and occasionally debating about string theory, which Jared thinks is bullshit.
The only real difference is that Jensen wants to jump Jared's bones all the time, and he's pretty good at smashing down the urge.
At least, he is, until Jared flops down on his bed and says, "How do you feel about dating?"
Jensen manages to not react at all, but it's a close thing. "What about it specifically?"
"I mean, do you have a girlfriend?"
"No."
"So do you want to date?"
"In general?"
"Well," says Jared, "specifically? I've got a date tonight, and she's got a friend for you if you want her."
"Is she legal?" says Jensen, rolling his eyes.
"She's twenty, man. Totally non-perv territory."
Jensen shifts a little. "I dunno, Jared . . ."
"She's hot," says Jared, in his pleading voice. "Seriously, seriously hot."
"Does you getting a date depend on me getting a date?"
"No," Jared says. "I'm too hot to need you to get me girls."
"Then I'm passing."
"Why?" asks Jared, pouting. "It'd be fun."
Jensen sighs. "I don't--I'm not actually into girls, Jared."
Jared sits up. "What?"
Jensen scrubs his hand through his hair. "I'm gay."
"Oh." Jensen can see his throat working. "Did you--god, am I always the last to know everything?"
"No one else knows," says Jensen. "Okay--Danneel knows. But I didn't tell her. She guessed when she met the guy I was dating."
"I can't believe you didn't tell me," Jared says.
Jensen sits down next to him on the bed. "I didn't want to just IM you with hey PS I'm gay. Seemed like I should do it in person."
Jared ducks his head. "So no double dates?"
Jensen shrugs. "Not unless you know a girl with a hot older brother or something."
"If I find one, I'll let you know." He shifts. "No boyfriend either?"
Jensen shakes his head. "We broke up before graduation. We weren't that serious."
"Oh. So--you've dated a lot of guys?"
Jensen smiles. "You dated a lot of girls?"
Jared shrugs. "Enough."
"And adding another," Jensen notes.
"Hey," he shrugs, "what can I say? She's cute."
"Always are, man. Don't be home too late. And don't do anything I wouldn't do."
"What are your feelings on kissing girls? Because I had big plans."
Jensen shoves him off the bed. "You're such a brat."
Jared laughs, but then sobers, scuffs his foot. "Thanks for telling me."
"Dude. You're my best friend. I hated not telling you."
And that, at least, is true. He's thought about calling Jared up after every one of his bad breakups, thought about telling him for a billion reasons, but it never felt right.
"Have fun on your date," he says.
Jared looks away. "Yeah, of course."
*
Jensen feels weirdly better after that. Yes, he's still in love with Jared, and that's pretty awkward, but everything's else is out in the open, and Jensen's more relaxed. It helps that he's actually taking everyone's advice and trying to have fun. Which mostly involves reading all the novels he's been ignoring in favor of school work and trying to ignore the way Jared has apparently decided that he's in the pool enough there's just no point getting dressed every morning.
"This is your idea of a good time," says Jared, sitting on the ottoman across from Jensen. His swim trunks are really, really low and his legs are really long and his hair is all wet and his skin is all tanned and Jensen takes a while to actually comprehend what Jared said.
"I like reading," he finally replies.
"You know you're so pasty you actually glow, right?"
Jensen looks at himself. He thinks he looks pretty decent. "I am not."
"No, you seriously are. Come read outside, dude."
Jensen doesn't think that hanging out by the pool while Jared does cannonballs is the best choice he could make in life.
"Yeah," he says anyway, "okay."
Jared gives him a hand, pulls him up, and Jensen relocates poolside. He ends up burned to all hell, and Jared laughs at him.
Danneel calls that night, while Jensen is wincing through trying to get aloe on his shoulders. It's not working. Jared brings the phone up and snorts into it as soon as he sees Jensen.
"He's being an idiot, Danny," says Jared, shaking his head. "I'm gonna give you to him and save the day."
"Asshole," says Jensen, wiping his hands and taking the phone. "Hey, Danny."
"Hey Jensen. How's vacation?"
"Relaxing until I started listening to Jared," he grumbles. Jared laughs and steals Jensen's aloe. "Fuck you, man!" Jensen protests, but then Jared gets some on his fingers and starts working it into Jensen's shoulders, and Jensen redirects his brain into thinking about anything other than the fact that Jared's fingers are slick and on his skin and could be used for some other things.
"Sounds like you're having a lot of fun," Danneel comments dryly.
The aloe is cool against his burn and Jared's hands are awesome, and Jensen puts effort into not moaning like a porn star. Or similar.
"Tons," he says instead. "Catching up on my reading."
"You're such a loser."
"That's what Jared said."
"Well you are," says Jared smugly.
"You guys should be doing something fun," says Danneel, and the way she says it makes it clear exactly what she thinks the two of them should be up to.
"Jared's having fun," says Jensen. "Went on a date the other night and everything."
Danneel huffs.
"How's Riley?"
"Still cute. But I don't think we're gonna get married or anything."
"But you're enjoying yourself, right?"
"I'm enjoying him. You should try it."
"Are you done?"
"I'm done. And Riley's back, so we're going for--" she considers. "You know, I lost track of what round we're on."
"Bye Danny," he says fondly.
Jared snorts. "Should've known you were gay. Better friends, my ass."
*
The next morning, Jensen doesn't even try to do aloe himself. He just goes downstairs, wincing and exhausted, to make Jared do it for him.
"Dad, I understand," he hears Jared say, and hangs back. There's something he can't quite identify in Jared's tone, something guarded and terse, and Jensen wants time to figure it out. "Nothing's happened."
A pause, Jensen assumes for Dr. Padalecki to talk.
"I'm fine, Jensen's fine," he says. "There's nothing to worry about. You're being paranoid."
It all sounds normal, on the surface. The reason Jeff is around at all is that Dr. Padalecki is paranoid, thinks Jared needs protecting from the whole damn world. Every time he's left alone, he worries. It's the only time Jensen really doesn't feel like a part of the family--it's clear how much more Dr. Padalecki worries about his real son.
But Jared's tone isn't normal for standard paranoia--he sounds tense, like maybe there's something legit here. Something specific, beyond Dr. Padalecki's general worrying.
Jensen doesn't knock before he goes in, since he never has in his life and doing it now would arise suspicion. Jared is, of course, wearing nothing but his swim trunks, because there is a god, and that god hates Jensen.
"Gotta go," says Jared to the phone, as Jensen waves the aloe at him. That's weird too, because usually Jared will turn the phone over, let Jensen say hi. "I'll call you soon."
"Who was that?" asks Jensen.
Jared takes the aloe and gets to work, and if he wasn't in so much pain, he'd think he should get sunburned more often. "Dad."
"What'd he want?"
"What does he ever want?" asks Jared, sighing. "To make sure I haven't been killed by terrorists or ninjas or--who else hates my dad?"
Jensen snickers. "He has never been attacked by ninjas."
"Last year," says Jared instantly. "Masi Oka sent some guys with some very ninja-like tendencies."
"Seriously?"
"Swear to god."
Jensen laughs. "Your life, man."
Jared's hands still on his back. "Your life too."
"Sorry I missed it."
"Only a matter of time before he busts out of jail. Maybe he'll try to assassinate you."
Jensen laughs and crosses his fingers. "God, I hope, I hope."
Jared wipes his hands on Jensen's shoulders. "Any exciting plans for today?"
"Wincing in pain every time I move. It's gonna be a blast."
"Bitch, bitch, bitch."
Jensen gets up and really does wince a little. "I'll wear a muumuu and read by the pool, happy?"
"You own a muumuu?"
"Shut up."
"Well, hot as that sounds," Jared says with a smirk, "I'm going out today."
"You are?"
"Date," says Jared with a shrug. "This girl wants to go to a carnival."
"Another girl?"
He grins. "What can I say, man? I'm popular."
"And so modest."
Jared pouts. "What, you don't think I'm sexy?" He flexes in the dorkiest way imaginable, unable to even keep a straight face through the proceedings.
"Get out of here, loser," says Jensen. "I've got books to read."
"We're partying tomorrow," Jared threatens. "You're gonna be tan by then."
"Define partying," says Jensen warily. He's not sure about partying with the townies--they're a few years younger than he is, more Jared's friends, but not even really that close to him. Neither of them ever really lived here; Jared went to Andover for school and his actual friends are scattered around the country, and so are Jensen's. Jared just cares more about having summer companionship, apparently.
Jensen's doing his best not to feel bitter. He had friends who weren't Jensen, that was fine. Plus, Jensen had ignored him for a solid two weeks. So he kind of has it coming. But how does Jared even find this many dates?
"I'll tell you when I figure it out," says Jared easily. "You all set?"
Jensen grabs 2666 and grins. "All set."
*
It turns out Jared's definition of partying is a Star Wars marathon. Which Jensen has no objections to, and is honestly kind of a relief. Jensen likes hanging out, but he'd rather just hang out with Jared.
Jared tilts his head as Obi-Wan reveals the whole Luke-has-a-sister thing. "You ever think about that?"
Jensen slants him a look. "Specify."
"I mean, what if you were making out with some guy one day and found out he was your brother later?"
Jensen chokes. "Gross," he says. "Also, what?"
"I mean--don't you ever wonder about your family?"
Jensen glances at the ground. He knows his parents died, but he doesn't know how; his first memories are of being in the orphanage. He went through a couple foster families that didn't work out--too shy, too quiet, not what they were expecting. And then, when he was twelve, Dr. Gerald Padalecki was looking for a companion for his son, and Jared--Jared picked him. And as far as Jensen knows, he's never regretted it.
Jensen hasn't either.
"They're dead," he says. "There's not a lot to wonder about."
Jared looks away. "I didn't mean--don't you want to know about them?"
"I thought about looking them up a few times," Jensen says, shifting. "But--I got a family, Jared."
That gets Jared's megawatt grin. He ducks his head. "Yeah, but . . . I dunno. I've got this friend from Andover, Sandy, right? She was an orphan and--I felt bad. That I never really asked you about it. Didn't want--I care, man."
"That's really touching, Jared," he says, raising his eyebrows. "But, seriously. I'm not wallowing in orphan angst. I'm pretty happy."
"Only pretty happy?"
"Well, some jackass is talking through Return of the Jedi," he grins. "But other than that . . ."
"Saying I talk too much?"
"Only for the last ten years."
Jared laughs and gives him the finger. "So you never worry you're going to end up kissing your brother?"
Jensen very pointedly looks at the screen and not at Jared. "Nah. Never."
*
A week later, Jared jumps on Jensen's bed while he's sleeping.
"Jesus Christ," Jensen chokes. "You weigh a fucking ton, get off me."
"We're out of food."
"And you want to crush and eat me?" he asks, rubbing his eyes. "Is that the master plan?"
"I want you to come shopping."
"You're rich, don't you have bitches to do that for you?"
"You are my bitches."
"That is a sad state of affairs," says Jensen. "You're not letting me go back to sleep, are you?"
"Never," agrees Jared. "Come on, dude. If you don't come I'm gonna buy nothing but candy bars and condoms."
"Please tell me you're not gonna use them together."
"Do I ask you about your kinks?" asks Jared. "Don't be such a judger."
Jensen sighs. "You know I can't do your bidding if you don't get off me, right?"
"You're coming?"
"I'm coming."
Jared jumps off, looking really awake and aware. Jensen hates him a little, rolls out of bed and finds his glasses. Jared just stands there, bouncing eagerly on the balls of his feet, like going to the store is the most exciting prospect ever. Jensen hates him a little.
"You know, I'm not going to out in my boxers," he says pointedly, pulling off his t-shirt. Jared stops bouncing and blinks, like this is a surprise. "A little privacy?" Jensen adds.
"Oh, yeah," says Jared, sunny smile returning. "I'll get you some coffee. You know, so you don't go back to sleep."
"You can't buy my love with coffee," Jensen grumbles, and Jared laughs as he goes.
"I can try."
Jensen manages to make his way downstairs only fifteen minutes later, which might be some kind of record for him. Jared has coffee, as promised, and even some food, and Jensen considers maybe forgiving him for being a jerk. He's not totally sold yet, though.
Jared doesn't help his case when they start shopping and he really does try to buy nothing but junk food.
"You like chocolate," says Jared.
"I also like not dying of scurvy."
"I don't think scurvy is fatal."
"Okay, I like having my teeth."
Jared clucks his tongue. "Don't they get in the way when you're blowing guys?"
Jensen trips and nearly takes out a display of Quaker Oats. "Jesus! We're in a grocery store." Not that a location exists where Jensen wants to discuss his oral sex habits with Jared. Unless they're talking about what they personally enjoy, and that is not actually a good path to go down. Platonic, fraternal thoughts only.
Jared just snickers and grabs a pack of fruit snacks. "There, happy?"
"I hate you."
And it's fun, is the worst part--Jensen missed this, just hanging out, and he'd be pretty much totally content if he didn't want to shove Jared up against the cereal aisle and kiss him breathless.
Of course, that's when the ninjas show up.
--
PART TWO
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles, Danneel Harris/Riley Smith, mentions of some others
Rating: Hard R.
Warnings: Adopted brother-cest, Jonny-Quest situations.
Word Count: 11500.
Summary: Jensen's got a good life--taken in by a rich and famous globe-trotting scientist, bound for grad school at Harvard--and then he goes and falls for his adopted brother.
Notes: Written for dawnstarrising for Sweet Charity. She happened to give me free reign during a time when I was like I REALLY WANT TO WRITE A J2 JONNY QUEST AU and said I could do that. So I hope she enjoys it as much as I enjoy incoherent Saturday morning cartoons. Title from Jonathan Coulton.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
"Dude," says Jared, grinning over the top of Jensen's laptop, "you have got to try this."
Jensen raises his eyebrows, eyes flicking back down to the screen. "I think words mean different things in your world."
"Which ones?" asks Jared.
"'Got to,' mostly."
Jared snorts. "Live a little, seriously. This thing is awesome."
Jensen knows the hoverboard is awesome. He spent all of last month carefully calibrating it to make sure it was completely and totally perfect. And fun as hell. He's not sure if Jared knows that, but he's not going to tell him. He kind of likes Jared's belief that Jensen does absolutely nothing interesting now that he's gone to college. It's hilarious. "I've got work."
Jared waves his hand. "Work, schmerk. Race me."
"Work schmerk?" asks Jensen. "What are you, twelve?"
Jared grins, big and cocky, dimples flashing, and Jensen kind of wishes he was twelve. Everything had been a lot easier back then, when he and Jared and Danneel were running around like hooligans, nearly getting killed every other week. When Jared was short and hyper and seemed a lot more like a kid.
Yeah, Jensen misses that a lot.
"Fuck you, man. Is Danny around? She always races me."
Jensen resolutely keeps his eyes on the laptop. Jared's crush on Danneel was easier then to, before Danneel might have taken him seriously.
Not that she seems to have started doing it yet. But it's only a matter of time.
"Think she's on a date," he says truthfully.
Jared lets out a huff of breath. "Again? Is it the same guy?"
"Riley or something," says Jensen absently. In fact, he knows exactly who it is; Riley Smith, age 22, just graduated Bowdoin. Jeff had him track down the guy's info, because Jeff takes protective father to inspirational new levels. Jensen is torn between being terrified of him and being in awe of him.
Jared sighs. "Why didn't you ever?" he asks, disentangling his feet from the hoverboard as he flops down on the couch, evidently giving up on his quest to make Jensen race him.
"Why didn't I ever what?"
"You and Danny. She was crazy about you, man."
Jensen laughs. "She's hot, dude, but I'm not sure there's a girl in the world hot enough to risk the wrath of Jeff. And the wrath of you."
"But we like you," Jared points out.
Jensen hasn't exactly come out to Jared yet. He hasn't actually come out to anyone yet, to be honest--Danneel figured it out his freshman year when she came for a campus visit and guessed that he and his then-boyfriend weren't totally platonic, but she's the only one in the family who knows he's interested in guys at all.
He stretches. "We tried it."
Jared jolts up. "What? When? What?"
"Right before I went to college, I guess. Remember me and Danny went to Costa Rica with her mom and you and your dad were checking out swamps?"
"Ugh," says Jared. "I still feel dirty from that."
Jensen laughs. "It was that summer," he admits.
Jared sobers immediately. "And you didn't tell me?"
"It was about a week, Jared. We figured out we're a lot better friends and decided to never mention it again."
Jared shakes his head. "Fuck, Jensen. I can't believe you--how could you be better friends?"
"We're awesome friends," says Jensen. Sometimes he feels like the only one who understands this. Or felt like it, anyway. Back before college, Jared was always following Danneel around like a lost puppy--okay, that's not totally fair, but still, totally crushing on her--and Danneel had a stupid thing for Jensen, and Jensen thought they were both his best friends and nothing could ever beat that. He thought he was the smart one, the one who wasn't getting involved in the stupid hormone shit.
Then, of course, while Jensen was away at college Jared grew five feet and got the best smile Jensen has ever seen, and now Jensen is not nearly as above it as he'd like. Whatever happened to brotherly love?
"Yeah, but--" Jared shakes his head and laughs. "You think she'd ever go for me?"
Jensen shrugs, pushing the laptop away and giving up. "You're kind of like a brother to her, Jared."
Jared huffs. "You guys are always saying that. But you're not like siblings for me."
Jensen stiffens, just a little, even though he's stupidly glad to hear it. Fucking crush.
"No, god, man--Jensen!" says Jared, looking aghast. "God, not like that. I mean--you and Danny are my best friends, and you're family, and I love you guys more than anything, but--"
"But not like it'd be creepy if you hooked up with Danny," Jensen supplies, smiling a little.
Jared smiles back. "Yeah." He pats the couch. "You're not even typing. Get over here and hang out with me, college boy."
Jensen hauls himself out of his chair and sits next to Jared on the couch.
"Seriously, it's been a week and I feel like I've barely seen you. You graduated, you aren't supposed to be working."
He laughs. "I've still got grad school."
"Nerd," Jared retorts fondly.
"Says the guy who's going to MIT."
"Apparently my dad's got an in or something."
Jensen is pretty sure there's no school in the country Dr. Padalecki doesn't have an in at. But Jared's smart as hell too, no doubt about it.
Jared ducks his head suddenly. "I noticed you're avoiding me, you know," he admits.
And Jensen has to feel a little bad, because it's been a week, and he's spent the whole time trying to ignore the way Jared makes him feel.
Jensen had resisted high school--he'd been a shy kid, beyond shy. For a long time after Dr. Padalecki adopted him, Jared was the only one who could get him out of his shell at all, so the idea of being stuck in one place away from the only family he'd even known? Not working for him. Danneel had gone off to some girls' school and Jensen and Jared had stayed with Dr. Padalecki and Jeff, getting a rag-tag education. But it turns out you can't actually get home-schooled and come out with a BA, so he'd ended up going to Yale, and Jared ended up going to private school, and between Dr. Padalecki's globetrotting and Jensen's internships and spring break trips, they barely saw each other for four years.
Jared's growth spurt had, apparently, hit somewhere around sixteen, and the kid had shot up even taller than Jensen and gotten a lot of muscle mass from training with Jeff regularly. Jensen had barely recognized him at graduation, and nearly fell over when he put together the sharp burst of attraction with Jared.
So he hasn't been spending as much time with Jared as he should have, because he's feeling guilty as fuck. Danneel, of course, noticed, and told him he was a fucking dumbass.
Par for the course, really.
"It's Harvard, Jared," he says finally. "It's stressful."
"And you're Dr. Gerald Padalecki's boy prodigy."
"No, that's you, dumbass."
Jared laughs. "You're the one who's getting published."
Jensen flushes. His thesis is actually becoming a book, which is fucking amazing.
"We should go see a movie or something," says Jared, tapping his foot against the arm of the couch. "Do something fun."
"You're seventeen. Your idea of fun is supposed to be way dirtier."
"You're prematurely old," says Jared, "I figure you forgot what fun is."
Jared's baiting him, and Jensen knows it.
"So what's fun for you?" asks Jensen. He's trying to sound as unflirty as possible.
Jared grins wide, and Jensen knows he's not going to say no.
*
"What did you do last night?" asks Danneel with a smirk when Jensen staggers downstairs the next morning, feeling crappy and ashamed. He's a college graduate; a seventeen-year-old kid should not be drinking him under the table. He's not even sure where Jared found the booze. He's too famous for a fake ID to work.
"If you say anything to Dr. Padalecki, I'm going to tell your dad that your boyfriend smokes pot."
Danneel laughs, which is especially mean given how hungover he is. The sound echoes in his skull. "What am I going to do with you, Jensen?"
"Shoot me. Like they do with lame horses."
She sits down and puts her head on his shoulder. "I should've seen this coming."
"Me being an idiot? Yeah, no surprise there."
"You and Jared are going to get married and travel the world adopting underprivileged orphans and saving lives with science."
Jensen snorts.
"It's pretty much what you do now, you're just not married."
"I was the orphan," Jensen points out.
Danneel waves her hand. She looks a lot like Jared when she does it, which is weird. "So it's been a week. How does it feel being a graduate?"
"Pretty much the same," says Jensen. "I'm still going to be in school in September."
"Yeah, but at Harvard. That's a big deal. You guys make me feel so dumb."
"Quit fishing for compliments, Danny. You go to fucking Brown."
She smiles. "Oh, hey, question."
"What?"
"What do you think the odds are I can convince my dad Riley is responsible enough to take me on a roadtrip?"
"Depends. In your universe, has hell frozen over?"
She shoves him. "I'm serious!"
"So am I. Have you met your dad?"
"It's not that much worse than college," she points out. "Besides, him and Dr. Padalecki are leaving."
Jensen chokes on his coffee. "What? When?"
Danneel clucks her tongue. "A couple days?"
"Where are they going?"
"Tibet."
"Why?"
"The Dalai Lama has some kind of problem for Dr. Padalecki."
Jensen sighs. "Of course he does."
"If you weren't holed up in your room hiding from Jared you'd know about this stuff," Danneel points out.
Jensen groans. "So they're leaving and you want to leave?"
"Exactly."
"So me and Jared."
"For at least three weeks," Danneel confirms.
Jensen laughs. "Stay, seriously."
"I'd just get in the way of your keggers."
"Oh god, he's going to want to have keggers."
"He's a rising freshman, he needs practice."
"My gravestone is going to say 'Fuck you, Danneel Harris' on it."
"Drink your coffee."
*
"This is good work, Jensen," says Dr. Padalecki, glancing over his program. "Very impressive." He looks up and smiles. "Have you considered taking a break?"
Jensen can't keep a smile off his face. "I'm feeling a little conspired against."
"Trust me, you're going to work like a dog at graduate school, son. You should take the time to get some rest."
"I'm not very good at resting, Dr. Padalecki."
"I've noticed that. When's the thesis being published?"
"Sometime in the fall, I think," he says, not wanting to admit that he knows the exact date.
Dr. Padalecki nods, a dismissal. As Jensen leaves, he adds, "Oh, Jensen?"
"Yes?"
"You know Jeff and I are headed for Tibet the day after tomorrow?"
"Danny mentioned it," he admits.
"I hope you'll have stopped avoiding Jared by then."
Jensen flushes. "I'm starting to think you guys all talk about me behind my back."
Dr. Padalecki laughs. "Only sometimes. I thought the two of you would appreciate having some time together--it's been quite a while since you could hang out."
"I do," Jensen says, half-protest. "I was just--I wanted to finish this."
"Well, it looks like you're making good progress. Still," he smiled. "I wouldn't sacrifice your vacation for it."
Jensen can't help smiling back. "Got it."
*
It hits Jensen around two a.m. as he's checking his code over for what seems like the thousandth time: he's in love with Jared.
He never gets this worked up over attractive guys--sure, he likes them, maybe worries a bit that they might not be gay, but even the worst crushes he's ever had never tore him up like this. He told himself it was the familiarity, the weirdness of finding someone he was so close to hot, but it's not actually strange. Jared is his best friend--even after four years apart, somehow--and it feels almost like a puzzle fitting together, realizing how he feels. He and Jared have always been in-sync, and now--now Jensen might fuck it up.
He writes //emotions are balls// into his code, figuring anyone who knows enough comp sci to read it is bound to have serious issues with interpersonal relationships. Then he groans and leans back.
In love with Jared. It's not a surprise, it's just--it fucking figures.
Right on schedule, an IM window pops up.
Jared: you awake?
Me: No rest for the wicked
Jared: since when are you the wicked?
Me: Shut up, I'm busy.
Jared: I'm bored, come entertain me
Me: b-u-s-y.
Jared: when's it due?
Me: I told Prof Kripke I'd have something to show him by day after tomorrow
Jared: brb
Jensen leans back on the couch, stretches and cracks his shoulders. He did tell Kripke he'd send him the program, but it wasn't like Kripke cared that much when it came. He's graduated, and Kripke's on vacation somewhere tropical, probably not checking his e-mail. But Jensen's glad to have a deadline. Or an excuse.
He's not really that surprised when Jared flops down next to him on the couch and hands him a Coke. He groans.
"I'm trying to be nice," says Jared, knocking his knee against Jensen's.
"I want to sleep sometime tonight."
"So sleep," says Jared.
Jensen scowls. "Working."
Jared leans over and snorts. "Emotions are balls? You're working hard man."
"I'm tired, shut up."
"What's it do, anyway?" Jared asks, scanning quickly. "A.I.?"
"You're such a showoff," snorts Jensen. "Yeah. A.I."
"That's awesome, man." Jared grins, and Jensen's heart skips a beat. He's always loved Jared's smile, he's just never wanted to kiss it off his face before.
He manages a smile in return. "Yeah." He sighs and rubs the back of his neck. "I might have to give up for the night, though. My eyes are crossing."
Jared leans over and puts the laptop on the table.
"I'm not an invalid."
"You're a stubborn bitch," says Jared, ruffling Jensen's hair. He doesn't move his hand, though, just pulls Jensen's head so they're kind of--
"What are you doing?"
"Snuggling," says Jared cheerfully. Then, softer, "I missed you, man."
Jensen finds himself cuddling closer, leaning close to Jared. "Missed you too," he admits.
"Never could stay awake," says Jared fondly. "Remember when we went to Alaska and shared the tent? I wanted to stay up all night and have a real sleepover, but we were sharing the sleeping bag and you just passed out."
Jensen wants to respond, defend himself somehow, but he's seriously exhausted and Jared is warm and familiar and he really did miss the fuck out of him, and apparently Jared's right about his ability to stay awake.
*
Jensen gets up before Jared the next morning and disentangles himself with effort. His entire body hurts, because sleeping on a couch wrapped around Jared is not actually good for his body parts.
Even if it's really nice.
Jensen is trying not to read too much into this. Jared's always been pretty touchy, and he gave Jensen a much smaller hug than he clearly wanted to when they first saw each other at graduation (Jensen assumes it was because he was looking so shocked), so Jared probably felt like he needed some more contact or something. That's gotta be it.
He makes it down to the kitchen where Jeff and Danneel are having breakfast without seeing Jared again, a win.
"Morning, sleepyhead," says Danneel.
"Hey, Jensen."
Jensen cracks every part of his body he can. It's a lot. "Morning."
"Rough night?" asks Danneel.
"I shouldn't sleep on couches anymore," he says.
"Your bed not good enough for you anymore?" asks Jeff, raising his eyebrows.
"Accident," says Jensen.
Right then, naturally, Jared tromps down the stairs and comes in from the same direction. Danneel clearly connects the dots and grins at Jensen, who looks down.
"Hey guys!" says Jared, knocking his shoulder against Jensen's. "We got coffee?"
"Pour your own, lazy ass," says Jensen, holding his own mug close.
"Meanie," says Jared, sticking his tongue out.
"Hey, wait," says Danneel. "You should ask Jared and Jensen."
"Because they never take your side on anything," says Jeff, smirking. "But all right. Boys, we're having a family debate. Danny thinks she's old enough to go cross-country with a boy."
"To Chicago. For a vacation. We just happen to be driving," says Danneel, rolling her eyes.
Jensen glances sideways at Jared to see signs of jealousy, but his jaw is set, giving nothing away.
"You're not old enough," says Jeff.
"I'm twenty-one," she points out. "If I'm not old enough now, when will be?"
"I don't like you going off alone. Maybe if Jared and Jensen--"
"Whoa," says Jared, putting his hands up in front of him. "Danny could take either of us in a fight. I'm not sure what we'd add to the trip."
"Two third wheels," says Jensen.
"Exactly," Jared agrees.
"I don't see how it's worse than me being at college," Danneel points out. "I didn't have anyone else there either and I was fine."
"What about sophomore year?" says Jeff.
Jensen and Jared exchange a look. Harris family arguments are always really, really awkward.
"One guy! The lamest attempt at kidnapping I've ever seen. And I beat the shit out of him," says Danneel.
"I just worry."
"Jensen," she says, turning to him. "What do you think?"
"I think you can take care of yourself," says Jensen firmly. "And you have been for at least three years."
"Longer with boarding school," Jared points out.
Jeff glares at both of them. "Jared, you're supposed to be on my side."
"Sorry, Jeff, the little bird's gotta leave the nest sometime."
"You know I'm three years older than you, right?" asks Danneel, laughing.
"Yeah," agree Jared, slinging an arm around her, "but to Jeff? You're always gonna be five years old."
"Not helping my case, jerk," says Danneel, elbowing Jared in the ribs.
"What did Dr. Padalecki say?" asks Jensen.
Jeff slumps. "It's four against one," he admits.
"I can take care of myself," Danneel states. "I'll have a tracker on at all times. Just--seriously, dad."
Jeff lets out a long sigh. "You really think Jared and Jensen are going to be okay if you leave them alone?"
"Us?" asks Jared, beaming. "What could possibly go wrong?"
*
Jensen finishes his code around when Danneel packs up and leaves, which works out pretty well. He's not really okay ignoring Jared when there's no one around to pay attention to him anyway, so the timing's good.
For about three days, they're almost like they were before. Jensen's never really felt the four-year difference between them, which he knows should be weird, but Jared was all he had for a long time, and the kid's smart beyond his years anyway. They fall back together almost effortlessly, racing hoverboards around the compound, testing out video games Jensen helped program in college, and occasionally debating about string theory, which Jared thinks is bullshit.
The only real difference is that Jensen wants to jump Jared's bones all the time, and he's pretty good at smashing down the urge.
At least, he is, until Jared flops down on his bed and says, "How do you feel about dating?"
Jensen manages to not react at all, but it's a close thing. "What about it specifically?"
"I mean, do you have a girlfriend?"
"No."
"So do you want to date?"
"In general?"
"Well," says Jared, "specifically? I've got a date tonight, and she's got a friend for you if you want her."
"Is she legal?" says Jensen, rolling his eyes.
"She's twenty, man. Totally non-perv territory."
Jensen shifts a little. "I dunno, Jared . . ."
"She's hot," says Jared, in his pleading voice. "Seriously, seriously hot."
"Does you getting a date depend on me getting a date?"
"No," Jared says. "I'm too hot to need you to get me girls."
"Then I'm passing."
"Why?" asks Jared, pouting. "It'd be fun."
Jensen sighs. "I don't--I'm not actually into girls, Jared."
Jared sits up. "What?"
Jensen scrubs his hand through his hair. "I'm gay."
"Oh." Jensen can see his throat working. "Did you--god, am I always the last to know everything?"
"No one else knows," says Jensen. "Okay--Danneel knows. But I didn't tell her. She guessed when she met the guy I was dating."
"I can't believe you didn't tell me," Jared says.
Jensen sits down next to him on the bed. "I didn't want to just IM you with hey PS I'm gay. Seemed like I should do it in person."
Jared ducks his head. "So no double dates?"
Jensen shrugs. "Not unless you know a girl with a hot older brother or something."
"If I find one, I'll let you know." He shifts. "No boyfriend either?"
Jensen shakes his head. "We broke up before graduation. We weren't that serious."
"Oh. So--you've dated a lot of guys?"
Jensen smiles. "You dated a lot of girls?"
Jared shrugs. "Enough."
"And adding another," Jensen notes.
"Hey," he shrugs, "what can I say? She's cute."
"Always are, man. Don't be home too late. And don't do anything I wouldn't do."
"What are your feelings on kissing girls? Because I had big plans."
Jensen shoves him off the bed. "You're such a brat."
Jared laughs, but then sobers, scuffs his foot. "Thanks for telling me."
"Dude. You're my best friend. I hated not telling you."
And that, at least, is true. He's thought about calling Jared up after every one of his bad breakups, thought about telling him for a billion reasons, but it never felt right.
"Have fun on your date," he says.
Jared looks away. "Yeah, of course."
*
Jensen feels weirdly better after that. Yes, he's still in love with Jared, and that's pretty awkward, but everything's else is out in the open, and Jensen's more relaxed. It helps that he's actually taking everyone's advice and trying to have fun. Which mostly involves reading all the novels he's been ignoring in favor of school work and trying to ignore the way Jared has apparently decided that he's in the pool enough there's just no point getting dressed every morning.
"This is your idea of a good time," says Jared, sitting on the ottoman across from Jensen. His swim trunks are really, really low and his legs are really long and his hair is all wet and his skin is all tanned and Jensen takes a while to actually comprehend what Jared said.
"I like reading," he finally replies.
"You know you're so pasty you actually glow, right?"
Jensen looks at himself. He thinks he looks pretty decent. "I am not."
"No, you seriously are. Come read outside, dude."
Jensen doesn't think that hanging out by the pool while Jared does cannonballs is the best choice he could make in life.
"Yeah," he says anyway, "okay."
Jared gives him a hand, pulls him up, and Jensen relocates poolside. He ends up burned to all hell, and Jared laughs at him.
Danneel calls that night, while Jensen is wincing through trying to get aloe on his shoulders. It's not working. Jared brings the phone up and snorts into it as soon as he sees Jensen.
"He's being an idiot, Danny," says Jared, shaking his head. "I'm gonna give you to him and save the day."
"Asshole," says Jensen, wiping his hands and taking the phone. "Hey, Danny."
"Hey Jensen. How's vacation?"
"Relaxing until I started listening to Jared," he grumbles. Jared laughs and steals Jensen's aloe. "Fuck you, man!" Jensen protests, but then Jared gets some on his fingers and starts working it into Jensen's shoulders, and Jensen redirects his brain into thinking about anything other than the fact that Jared's fingers are slick and on his skin and could be used for some other things.
"Sounds like you're having a lot of fun," Danneel comments dryly.
The aloe is cool against his burn and Jared's hands are awesome, and Jensen puts effort into not moaning like a porn star. Or similar.
"Tons," he says instead. "Catching up on my reading."
"You're such a loser."
"That's what Jared said."
"Well you are," says Jared smugly.
"You guys should be doing something fun," says Danneel, and the way she says it makes it clear exactly what she thinks the two of them should be up to.
"Jared's having fun," says Jensen. "Went on a date the other night and everything."
Danneel huffs.
"How's Riley?"
"Still cute. But I don't think we're gonna get married or anything."
"But you're enjoying yourself, right?"
"I'm enjoying him. You should try it."
"Are you done?"
"I'm done. And Riley's back, so we're going for--" she considers. "You know, I lost track of what round we're on."
"Bye Danny," he says fondly.
Jared snorts. "Should've known you were gay. Better friends, my ass."
*
The next morning, Jensen doesn't even try to do aloe himself. He just goes downstairs, wincing and exhausted, to make Jared do it for him.
"Dad, I understand," he hears Jared say, and hangs back. There's something he can't quite identify in Jared's tone, something guarded and terse, and Jensen wants time to figure it out. "Nothing's happened."
A pause, Jensen assumes for Dr. Padalecki to talk.
"I'm fine, Jensen's fine," he says. "There's nothing to worry about. You're being paranoid."
It all sounds normal, on the surface. The reason Jeff is around at all is that Dr. Padalecki is paranoid, thinks Jared needs protecting from the whole damn world. Every time he's left alone, he worries. It's the only time Jensen really doesn't feel like a part of the family--it's clear how much more Dr. Padalecki worries about his real son.
But Jared's tone isn't normal for standard paranoia--he sounds tense, like maybe there's something legit here. Something specific, beyond Dr. Padalecki's general worrying.
Jensen doesn't knock before he goes in, since he never has in his life and doing it now would arise suspicion. Jared is, of course, wearing nothing but his swim trunks, because there is a god, and that god hates Jensen.
"Gotta go," says Jared to the phone, as Jensen waves the aloe at him. That's weird too, because usually Jared will turn the phone over, let Jensen say hi. "I'll call you soon."
"Who was that?" asks Jensen.
Jared takes the aloe and gets to work, and if he wasn't in so much pain, he'd think he should get sunburned more often. "Dad."
"What'd he want?"
"What does he ever want?" asks Jared, sighing. "To make sure I haven't been killed by terrorists or ninjas or--who else hates my dad?"
Jensen snickers. "He has never been attacked by ninjas."
"Last year," says Jared instantly. "Masi Oka sent some guys with some very ninja-like tendencies."
"Seriously?"
"Swear to god."
Jensen laughs. "Your life, man."
Jared's hands still on his back. "Your life too."
"Sorry I missed it."
"Only a matter of time before he busts out of jail. Maybe he'll try to assassinate you."
Jensen laughs and crosses his fingers. "God, I hope, I hope."
Jared wipes his hands on Jensen's shoulders. "Any exciting plans for today?"
"Wincing in pain every time I move. It's gonna be a blast."
"Bitch, bitch, bitch."
Jensen gets up and really does wince a little. "I'll wear a muumuu and read by the pool, happy?"
"You own a muumuu?"
"Shut up."
"Well, hot as that sounds," Jared says with a smirk, "I'm going out today."
"You are?"
"Date," says Jared with a shrug. "This girl wants to go to a carnival."
"Another girl?"
He grins. "What can I say, man? I'm popular."
"And so modest."
Jared pouts. "What, you don't think I'm sexy?" He flexes in the dorkiest way imaginable, unable to even keep a straight face through the proceedings.
"Get out of here, loser," says Jensen. "I've got books to read."
"We're partying tomorrow," Jared threatens. "You're gonna be tan by then."
"Define partying," says Jensen warily. He's not sure about partying with the townies--they're a few years younger than he is, more Jared's friends, but not even really that close to him. Neither of them ever really lived here; Jared went to Andover for school and his actual friends are scattered around the country, and so are Jensen's. Jared just cares more about having summer companionship, apparently.
Jensen's doing his best not to feel bitter. He had friends who weren't Jensen, that was fine. Plus, Jensen had ignored him for a solid two weeks. So he kind of has it coming. But how does Jared even find this many dates?
"I'll tell you when I figure it out," says Jared easily. "You all set?"
Jensen grabs 2666 and grins. "All set."
*
It turns out Jared's definition of partying is a Star Wars marathon. Which Jensen has no objections to, and is honestly kind of a relief. Jensen likes hanging out, but he'd rather just hang out with Jared.
Jared tilts his head as Obi-Wan reveals the whole Luke-has-a-sister thing. "You ever think about that?"
Jensen slants him a look. "Specify."
"I mean, what if you were making out with some guy one day and found out he was your brother later?"
Jensen chokes. "Gross," he says. "Also, what?"
"I mean--don't you ever wonder about your family?"
Jensen glances at the ground. He knows his parents died, but he doesn't know how; his first memories are of being in the orphanage. He went through a couple foster families that didn't work out--too shy, too quiet, not what they were expecting. And then, when he was twelve, Dr. Gerald Padalecki was looking for a companion for his son, and Jared--Jared picked him. And as far as Jensen knows, he's never regretted it.
Jensen hasn't either.
"They're dead," he says. "There's not a lot to wonder about."
Jared looks away. "I didn't mean--don't you want to know about them?"
"I thought about looking them up a few times," Jensen says, shifting. "But--I got a family, Jared."
That gets Jared's megawatt grin. He ducks his head. "Yeah, but . . . I dunno. I've got this friend from Andover, Sandy, right? She was an orphan and--I felt bad. That I never really asked you about it. Didn't want--I care, man."
"That's really touching, Jared," he says, raising his eyebrows. "But, seriously. I'm not wallowing in orphan angst. I'm pretty happy."
"Only pretty happy?"
"Well, some jackass is talking through Return of the Jedi," he grins. "But other than that . . ."
"Saying I talk too much?"
"Only for the last ten years."
Jared laughs and gives him the finger. "So you never worry you're going to end up kissing your brother?"
Jensen very pointedly looks at the screen and not at Jared. "Nah. Never."
*
A week later, Jared jumps on Jensen's bed while he's sleeping.
"Jesus Christ," Jensen chokes. "You weigh a fucking ton, get off me."
"We're out of food."
"And you want to crush and eat me?" he asks, rubbing his eyes. "Is that the master plan?"
"I want you to come shopping."
"You're rich, don't you have bitches to do that for you?"
"You are my bitches."
"That is a sad state of affairs," says Jensen. "You're not letting me go back to sleep, are you?"
"Never," agrees Jared. "Come on, dude. If you don't come I'm gonna buy nothing but candy bars and condoms."
"Please tell me you're not gonna use them together."
"Do I ask you about your kinks?" asks Jared. "Don't be such a judger."
Jensen sighs. "You know I can't do your bidding if you don't get off me, right?"
"You're coming?"
"I'm coming."
Jared jumps off, looking really awake and aware. Jensen hates him a little, rolls out of bed and finds his glasses. Jared just stands there, bouncing eagerly on the balls of his feet, like going to the store is the most exciting prospect ever. Jensen hates him a little.
"You know, I'm not going to out in my boxers," he says pointedly, pulling off his t-shirt. Jared stops bouncing and blinks, like this is a surprise. "A little privacy?" Jensen adds.
"Oh, yeah," says Jared, sunny smile returning. "I'll get you some coffee. You know, so you don't go back to sleep."
"You can't buy my love with coffee," Jensen grumbles, and Jared laughs as he goes.
"I can try."
Jensen manages to make his way downstairs only fifteen minutes later, which might be some kind of record for him. Jared has coffee, as promised, and even some food, and Jensen considers maybe forgiving him for being a jerk. He's not totally sold yet, though.
Jared doesn't help his case when they start shopping and he really does try to buy nothing but junk food.
"You like chocolate," says Jared.
"I also like not dying of scurvy."
"I don't think scurvy is fatal."
"Okay, I like having my teeth."
Jared clucks his tongue. "Don't they get in the way when you're blowing guys?"
Jensen trips and nearly takes out a display of Quaker Oats. "Jesus! We're in a grocery store." Not that a location exists where Jensen wants to discuss his oral sex habits with Jared. Unless they're talking about what they personally enjoy, and that is not actually a good path to go down. Platonic, fraternal thoughts only.
Jared just snickers and grabs a pack of fruit snacks. "There, happy?"
"I hate you."
And it's fun, is the worst part--Jensen missed this, just hanging out, and he'd be pretty much totally content if he didn't want to shove Jared up against the cereal aisle and kiss him breathless.
Of course, that's when the ninjas show up.
--
PART TWO