I have fairly fine, straightish hair to my waist or thereabouts, that I only wash about once a week; always had it drummed into me that letting the natural oils appear in the hair before washing it, was good for it. I get chronic itchy flaky scalp that appears guaranteed a day after using any commercial shampoo
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Good luck finding what works for you!
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My grandma's all have short, curly permed hairdo's, so I don't think they'd be much help.
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In addition to the benefit of making the scales of your hair lie flat, after you use baking soda to scrub the excess greasiness off of your scalp and roots, you need some kind of acid to return your scalp to it's natural slightly acidic PH, or the oils come back in full force and then some to balance it out for you. (Which rather defeats the purpose of having "washed" with baking soda in the first place.) Some people use diluted lemon juice or tea in place of vinegar if they don't like the smell of vinegar. (There's a no_poo community here for more ideas.)
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You could also try a shampoo bar (again, more info in the other forum).
My grandma used a bar of cheap brown laundry soap to wash her hair.
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The conditioner, however (Lush Veganese), I am in love with.
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