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[liliaeth]

You know, I was thinking. Am I the only person that doesn't think that romantic pairings are the most important bonds people can have?

For example, I was asking for recs on spnstoryfinders earlier and I realized that my biggest problem is that even though I love Dean/Castiel, that Castiel is actually third in my list of favorite spn chars, after Sam

Comments

[enigmaticblues]

Actually, my Sun 'verse series is more about the relationship between Sam and Dean, although the main pairing is Dean/Cas.

I think that any fic that has a major romantic pairing will almost always by default be about the romantic pairing. Personally, I love fics that have really complicated relationships that may or may not be romantic, and the more complex the emotions, the better. But I think those really can be hard to find at times, depending on the fandom.

[liliaeth]

I've been told that it might have something to do with canon pairings vs fanon pairings. Can't say I disagree with that notion.

[honeylocusttree]

In fact, in a brotherly bond as strong as that between Sam and Dean, having sex can only serve to diminish the bond between them, rather than strengthen it.

THIS. Exactly. I was actually ruminating on this exact fact recently--like, a week or two ago. I mean putting them in the position (hah) of being lovers instead of freakishly close siblings completely changed the relationship and necessarily cuts out huge great chunks of their interconnection in order to make room for the characteristics of a sexual relationship. It completely misunderstands the nature of such sibling relationships and makes it into something...less.

[liliaeth]

Yet somehow fandom and society as a whole seems to think that somehow a sexual/romantic relationship surpasses all other connections, which I personally just can't agree with.

[corbyinoz]

Oh, lord, yes. I couldn't agree more. I find the privileging of 'romance' above all other bonds very tiresome. Came up against that in Stargate fandom, where the newly imposed Samantha/Jack romance was suddenly more important than the friendship (or slash r'ship) between Jack and Daniel, which was the basis of the film and the core relationship in the first three seasons. Suddenly that relationship was devalued (in fact, even deconstructed) and it was all mooney-eyed looks from a professional female soldier who should know better. It was even allowed to interfere in the field. What was most saddening was this notion that the strong friendship with a male couldn't continue while the other male was in a 'romantic' relationship with a female (as grotesque as it was

[liliaeth]

Very very true. I think one of the main reasons I get bored with some fandoms. (not necesserily the show it's based on, but the fanfic) is that the focus is so strongly on romantic/sexual pairings, that I just ... lose interest.

[super_pan]

I dunno, slash doesn't work for me in most of the "fandoms" that I'm in because it seems like the canon specifically precludes it. In the case of Supernatural, I have never seen any evidence that Sam or Dean are anything other than heterosexual. And they have specifically addressed the wincest thing as not gonna happen. In examples where the characters are not as clearly defined in their straightness or gayness or in betweeness, I may see things in a more heterosexual filter but it doesn't bother me as Out Of Character for a character to be gay. Like Dr. Who, or Dumbeldore. But in fact, even heterosexual pairings that I feel are out of character don't work for me either, like Jo or Ellen with anyone, or frankly any character in SPN with any other character, cuz nobody in that verse has time or luck for romantic love or long term partnership other than brotherhood or father/son hunting relationships

[liliaeth]

Oh I agree in regards to a lot of fandoms. though I do tend to see Dean as bisexual with a physical preference for breasts and an emotional preference towards men.

But ... that doesn't mean that Dean would act on it. And I can't see him even think of his brother in that way.

Also, no matter who Dean would ever end up in a relationship with, the fact of the matter is that Sam will always come first, no matter how much Dean loves the other person, slash or het.

[liliaeth]

I must admit I haven't been reading much Spike/Xander in the past few years. I can't even say why, I think it's partly because I often find it hard to recognize Xander in them.

I mean, I like the flawed multidimensional Xander we had on the show, and yet in Spander fics he so often gets turned into a Gary Stue. (that and I really find it nigh impossible to see Spike as a top.)