OOM: Another night off

[latino_menace]

It's been so much better having Random staying nights at the bar. But it's not home anymore either and it's nice just to come back through the door to a place that's just theirs.

Ramon puts down the bag full of baby stuff he's carried through and holds the door open for Random.

'I think I want to get drunk tonight.'

Comments

[underwater_owl]

"Yeah?"

He walks through, baby in arms, smile on his face.

"Can't really join you, but I'll happily tie you to things when you do. Or sling you across the bed and do horribly nice things to you."

Either or.

"After bed-time, I mean."

[latino_menace]

Ramon snickers and runs a hand through his hair.

'I should hope so. I would hope I definitely don't have that 'innocent' thing going on. It'd be very bad for my reputation.'

Christian is eyed again.

'Would you be different with someone like that? I mean - not submissive? Not just with sex, with everything. I can't imagine you being the one to curl round someone that didn't stand up to you a bit.'

Not that he's very good about standing up to him either, when he's upset.

[underwater_owl]

"I'd probably be firmer. He'd probably need me to be."

Looking at the boy, at least.

"Who I curl around... Christ, I curl around everything. But that boy needs someone to point out to him that hookers aren't good people to fall in love with, and 'at first song' doesn't really happen. And that a woman on the floor pretending to orgasm has issues. I'd probably push myself harder. It's very hard to say."

[latino_menace]

Hmmm. Interesting. Ramon rests his chin back on his shoulder and stares at the baby, while his good arm folds round Random protectively. Mine.

'What was Matthew like?'

Yeah, he remembered that name.

'Before Lillith, you said there was a guy called Matthew that you loved, only you were only with him a month or so. Tell me about him?'

[underwater_owl]

"He was little. A bit shorter than me. Looked Asian, though he was from a completely different world. Wore glasses. Brilliant. An anarchist, actually. Very formal, very clipped, very polished."

Now the baby's chewing on Random's fingers. But he doesn't really mind. He's distracted.

"I shouldn't have fallen for him. He was essentially fighting a war. It was one of the more stupid things I've done recently. But I was smuggling weapons for a while, and knew him pretty well for a couple of years. Then he started working with me, and I got to know him a lot better. Then it became obvious that popular oppinion held me to be a spy, for the enemy, and I kissed him goodbye and got out before he became convinced."

[latino_menace]

He's quiet now, trying to envision this other man that Random had fallen for. There's a stab of jealousy, sure, even though he knows it's stupid. Because Random is in his arms right now, holding a baby and bringing him up in the same house. And this Matthew is probably long dead.

'Were you a spy for the enemy?'

[underwater_owl]

"Yeah."

His voice is almost swallowed by the profound, profound regret.

"I'd been giving them misinformation for a while, but I couldn't keep it up. I had to get out of there before anything happened. If I thought it'd have made it any easier, I'd have joined his side in a second, but I was there for the adrenaline, and sort of found him on the way. He never loved me, thank God."

[latino_menace]

Ramon kisses the nearest available bit of skin and holds him a bit tighter.

'Don't see how anyone couldn't. What was the matter with him?'

Not love Random? Impossible.

'I'm not surprised you were spying though. I feel like I should be mad at you for that but I don't care.'

[underwater_owl]

Oh.

Well, a little crushing, that.

"I'm hardly a CTU agent in disguise, Ramon. Don't you dare think it. Don't you dare. Not after everything."

He glances back at him.

"His problem... he was intuitive. I think he knew. But I also think he knew I was sorry for it. Especially after I left."

[latino_menace]

Ramon does a mental emergency stop, then reverses at high speeds.

'Wait...no, I didn't mean it like that. I don't doubt you baby, there's no way I would. Not now.'

Not ever, if truth be told. Apart from the first few days when he wasn't sure if Random would enlist his father's help to back up Andres, he's never thought of Random as someone trying to get at him.

'I just meant spying in general. It's not like I've never used spies for the buiness, it's just a bit different since one arrested me, you know?'

A hand rubs over his stomach in a hopefully reassuring way.

'Did you leave him a note or something? Or just the fact that you left gave it away?'

[underwater_owl]

"I didn't. He was allowed to take it as he liked. He knew I loved him, though. I'm sure. He was always perceptive. Quiet, brusque, perceptive."

He is reassured. Touch does that for him.

"It was so fucking stupid of me. As for spying, did you ever think I wasn't one? I'm a courtier. It's practically the same thing."

[latino_menace]

'Stupid to fall for him? I'm no expert but I'm given to understand that you don't really get a choice in how it happens or who with. From experience, that seems pretty true to me.'

This Matthew guy is obviously a jerk.

'I don't know. I don't really know what courtiers do, never having been in a royal court.'

[underwater_owl]

"Right. I keep forgetting. Well, it's basically synonymous with both 'actor' and 'whore' at once. You do what you have to for the court, and you do it as best you can. It can also mean 'assassin' and it can also mean 'negotiator.' Whatever talents you have, you use. And you don't regret any of it, either. Before you ask, whore isn't in the literal sense, but rather more the prostitution of who you are and what your position is."

He says it with a rather unusual amount of pride. Given everything.

[latino_menace]

Ramon doesn't say anything for quite a long time. Then he starts to laugh.

'So what you're telling me, is that you're fully experienced in a job that I'm now supposed to be doing for Arithon. Damn Random, why couldn't you have told Asandir that before he collared me for the job? You'll probably do it better than I will.'

But it's kind of reassuring to know that at least he'll have someone to ask for help on.

'If Amber's the only true city though, who do you even have to negotiate with? Who's going to question anything Oberon says?'

[underwater_owl]

"There are some cities closer in. Rebma, for one. Where our boy will live."

The baby is glanced at, and Random's fingers finally extracted from his mouth.

"They try to keep polite. When I was younger there was a war. With Begma. I barely remember it. Also, when Oberon's on a sojourn, we have to be a lot more careful. Or, we used to. When the oldest of us was still quite young, and we weren't bold enough to simply not care."

[latino_menace]

'You're going to send him to Remba?'

He hasn't heard that before. He'd thought Random was going to keep him away from there from now on.

'I find it hard to believe that you can be any more bold. Any of you.'

He turns his head to face Random, resting his cheek on his shoulder this time. 'If there's another war, you'll go, won't you?'