fuck me cause i have nothin cause iam nothing. cause i have lost my fucking mind.

ive had it with chasing after people. iam not chasing after another girl or boy agian in my life. if they want to talk to me then they better fucking call. ive had it with people hurting me. dont talk to people therefore there is no one to hurt you. nikki's gettin common sence in her old age. i cant wait to start college it brings so many new ( Read more... )

i got a letter today in the mail that told me who my roommate is. suprisingly, her name is jessica. what the mutherfuckingfuck is that name goin to haunt me for the rest of my life? i guess the fuck so. i have fallin in love again just to find myself out of it. i love ..... no one right now. which is really odd, for nikki hill. usually iam seeing ( Read more... )

I lost what i use to be and i have a long ways to go to get back to it, but godamnit. iam goin to get there. iam going to take all of the pain that i have caused myself and all that others have gave me and use it. i am goin to get inshape iam goin to fucking change my body. iam goin to stop gettin high on the dubby and go back to poppin pills for ( Read more... )

nikki: (cryingly/pleadingly)
show me how to die
and i promise you no more lies
x-girlfriend: (trying to listen to her, but obviously don't believe a word she is saying)
nikki: (takes a deep breath)
show me how to stop the pain
and my trust you will gain
x-girlfriend: (looks away and starts to move)
nikki: (moves so she can look in her eyes)
get me out of ( Read more... )

ok so iam like completely in love with this new song by seether and amy lee broken. i cant download it no one will let me. ggrrr. the users pictures isnt working on lj so iam mad about that too. gggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrr.

i just got home like a hour ago man i missed arkansas! shit, but those wv people know how to party! iam so fuckin happy to be here. besides all of being home the guy that i started likeing while in wv is my cusion friend and was workin up there with us. comes to find out he is my cusion by a marriage on my dad's side. thats shit. i have a new ( Read more... )

hey everyone iam still settin in wheeling wv. its been ok i have got to go gammbling. i went to some guys house last night and had a little to drink and some dubby. besides that i have read two books. and done alot of thinking lately i hate it when my mind thinks and i cant write whats goin on up there down cause then its gets all wrong and bad ( Read more... )

i just wanted to tell everyone that reads my journal, i dont know many that do, good bye. i hope that u all have fun while i am gone. while iam gone iam goin to try and go to the public library while iam there to check email and this and so on. loves to all. ~ the nikki

lalala. i just got out of the shower and i feel alive. hehe. i was goin to wear shorts tonight so i shaved my legs. now that i look at them long enough i dont want to wear shorts cause i dont like looking at all of the cuts and brusies. those things arent from myself. i got them from the allstar game. they just make me think i hurt myself or ( Read more... )