fic: thnks fr th mmrs (4)
pairin Kurt/Blaine
word count: 3800 (this part)
rating: nc-17
summary Kurt and Blaine meet for the first time at Scandals… and then run into each other a second time in the place they least expec
a/n: i was totally planning on posting this last night/earliER this morning but then i ran into dilemma bout what i was going to do for this chapter, so i've decided to rework my plans and um divide this chapter into two parts, so now there will be six chapters *u* thank you to all who have read/responded thus far, you guys are the bees knees! the song referenced in this chapter is called 'sarah smiles' and it's worth listening to, because it really did remind me of their situation so um yeah :)
livejournal: part 1 part 2 part 3
tumblr part 1/ par 2 / part 3
--
By the time the weekend was over, Kurt found himself itching to get back to school. It wasn’t that he was looking forward to teaching (which made him feel a bit guilty), but more because he needed to talk to Blaine.
The first thing he did when he got to the school was head straight up to the staffroom. Jeff tried to engage him in discussion in the hall but Kurt brushed him off, telling him they could talk later but he had something important to attend to. He felt guilty for doing it, but this was important, for his own peace of mind.
He marched right up to the staffroom. He spotted him quickly in an ironic blazer, smiling at one of the teachers he was talking to. Kurt tapped him on the shoulder and Blaine turned, raising his eyebrows as he came face to face with Kurt.
“I’m sorry for interrupting,” he said to Ms Brenner, the hospitality teacher, “but do you mind if I borrow Blaine for a moment?”
The teacher didn’t mind, shooting Blaine a quick wink as she walked off.
“Is everything… alright?” Blaine asked, giving Kurt a curious look.
“Fine,” Kurt said (he hoped). “I just… I wanted to ask you about something.”
Blaine raised his eyebrows. “Well?”
“On Saturday night… you and Tina…?” Kurt trailed off and Blaine was still looking at him expectantly. Kurt gave a little huff. Did he really have to spell it out? “Were you on a date?”
Blaine’s eyebrows shot up in surprise before he schooled his expression, his lips curling up into a flirty smirk, his eyes dancing.
“Kurt,” he teased, drawing out the vowel, “were you jealous?”
Kurt felt heat flood his cheeks and he glared, folding his arms. He - jealous?
“I’m just looking out for Tina,” he insisted haughtily.
Blaine gave him an incredulous look before bursting into laughter. “Kurt,” he said, voice laced with bemusement, “I’m gay.”
“Well, does Tina know that?”
Blaine looked taken aback, face falling instantly. “I… well, I never said… but she…” Blaine faltered for a moment, taking a deep breath. “She’s a lovely girl and I enjoy her company a lot but…”
Kurt raised his eyebrows in prompt and Blaine slumped.
“Did she tell you she thought it was a date?”
Kurt bit his lip. “Not exactly… but you might want to be careful next time you go out. She’s my friend and I don’t want her to get hurt.” He felt quite selfish for justifying his own nosiness, especially with the relief that was washing through him.
Blaine bit his lip as he nodded and the bell rang overhead, signaling Kurt’s turn to leave. But before he could, Blaine put a gentle hand on his shoulder and forced him to turn around to face him, staring at him with wide, earnest eyes.
“You know I would never lead her on, right?” he checked. “I would never… I would never do that to somebody.”
Kurt forced a gentle smile. “No, of course not.”
Blaine visibly relaxed and Kurt wondered whether there was more to his words than Kurt quite understood.
He tried not to let it get to him.
--
Kurt managed to get caught up enough in his classes to not let Tina or Blaine slip into his mind until lunch. He headed up to the staffroom as usual and headed over to his usual table where Tina was beckoning him with excited eyes.
“Guess what?” she prompted in an eager but hushed tone.
Kurt lifted an eyebrow at the lieu of greeting. “Hello, to you, too,” he quipped.
Tina rolled her eyes. “Yes, hello, how are you, Blaine’s gay.”
“Tina,” Kurt hissed, his eyes darting around the room to check whether or not anyone had overheard them. Thankfully, everyone else seemed absorbed in their own meals and conversations. But just for a second, Kurt’s eyes landed on Blaine, a second long enough for Blaine to look up and catch his eye, a smirk spreading across his lips before he winked and turned back to his conversation.
He winked.
Kurt tried to control his racing heart as Tina rolled her eyes before launching into the rest of her story.
“So, I did like him,” she said, “but then he told me he was gay and that there was another guy he thought I might be interested. His name is David and he works at a kindergarten and helps out at his grandmother’s flower shop in his spare time. Doesn’t he sound adorable?”
Usually, Kurt would have found the way Tina could fall so quickly rather endearing, but now he was only astonished.
Blaine had softened the blow of unintentionally leading her on by trying to hook her up with somebody else?
“But now you can ask him out, Kurt.”
Tina had been rambling on but Kurt had been lost in his own thoughts. These words, however, were more than enough to draw him out of his reverie.
Hoping he had misheard, Kurt blinked back at her blankly. “Sorry?”
“You can ask Blaine out,” Tina said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I mean, he’s gay, you’re gay, he’s sweet, and nice, and you two obviously get along. And now that I know he’s gay, I realize how blind I’ve really been. The way he smiles at you… I didn’t think anything of it before because I know it’s probably the way I smile at you. I mean, it’s like he’s in awe of you, for which I didn’t blame him. I mean, look at you.” She chuckled and Kurt found himself turning very red in the wake of her compliment. “But now I realize that it probably meant something much more than that.”
“Tina,” Kurt said tightly, “just because you’re happy being set up with someone, doesn’t mean I’m the same.”
Tina looked slightly offended. “Kurt… I was just saying-“
God, why did everyone feel the need to interfere with his life?
“It’s fine,” Kurt insisted. “I’m fine, Tina, I’m happy, even. But I really don’t need your help finding a boyfriend, okay, I’m perfectly happy on my own.”
And with that, he stood to his feet, ignoring Tina’s crestfallen expression as he shouldered his bag and strode from the room. He didn’t look back, but if he had, he might have noticed Blaine’s eyes following him sadly as he went.
--
The rest of the day passed mercifully quick. He didn’t speak to Tina again, but he sent her a text once he had cooled down to assure her that he was grateful for her concern, really, and he wasn’t mad. He just hoped she didn’t take that the wrong way…
After classes he was heading back to his car when he found himself once more being chased by one Blaine Anderson. He sighed at the sound of him calling his name and leant back against his car, wondering what on earth he could want now.
“Listen, Kurt,” he said as he came to a halting stop right in front of him, chest rising and falling with stuttered breaths. “Are you busy this afternoon?”
“No… why?” Kurt asked in surprise.
“I was wondering if you wanted to have coffee with me?”
Coffee?
“I… is everything alright?” Kurt checked and Blaine coloured.
“Fine,” he managed. “I… I understand if you don’t want- I just thought- starting over, friends…” he stuttered out and Kurt felt discomfort nag in his chest but he found himself nodding anyway, not wanting to be rude.
“Sure,” he said and Blaine visibly sagged with relief.
“Okay,” Blaine agreed happily. “There’s a small coffee shop just outside of here - the Lima Bean-“
“I know the one.”
“Excellent,” Blaine beamed. “Er… well, see you there in fifteen?”
“Sure.”
Friends, Kurt repeated to himself as Blaine gave him a quick wave before heading off to the direction of his car. Friends have coffee, friends talk. He and Blaine were friends.
(Maybe if he said it thought it hard enough he might actually find himself believing it).
--
It was surprisingly quiet that afternoon in the Lima Bean which Kurt was grateful for. Not a lot had changed since he had come here as a teenager, and waves of nostalgia rolled through him. He ordered himself a drink and found a free table, playing on his phone until Blaine arrived. He looked as gorgeous as ever, bathed in the sunlight that washed through the glass paned windows lining the walls. His scotch coloured eyes scanned the room and his face lit up as they landed on Kurt, shooting him a quick wink before grabbing a place in the queue to line up.
Kurt tried to tear his eyes away, but he found himself watching him as he waited in line. He had been blown away by how gorgeous he was in the dim lights at Scandals but in broad daylight he was pretty much the most beautiful thing Kurt had ever seen. He was confused as to why someone so attractive would wrap himself in god awful clothes and gel their hair to cement. A worrying thought nagged at his chest when he realized how well he had dressed up that night, how he had put on tight clothes and styled his hair, like he was only free to let himself go in the comfort of the night. He had run from Kurt’s bed in the morning before he could even see him in the day. He wasn’t a vampire, Kurt was pretty sure, but someone who was insecure of his true self?
Well, that thought somehow didn’t seem too far out.
Blaine soon arrived back with his coffee and took a seat across from him. He smiled in greeting and took an eager sip of his coffee, exhaling and Kurt could almost imagine the remnants of his headache slowly dissolving out. He knew the feeling well.
“Thanks for meeting me,” Blaine said gratefully, “I would have… I would have understood if you didn’t want to.”
“It’s fine,” Kurt insisted, smiling. “Friends, right?”
“Yeah,” Blaine agreed, but his smile faltered for a moment.
“So…” Kurt prompted, raising an eyebrow, “I heard you were planning on hooking Tina up with one of your friends.”
Blaine frowned. “You say it like it’s a bad thing.”
“Well… when I said letting her down gently that wasn’t quite what I had in mind,” Kurt said slowly.
“That’s not what I’m trying to do,” Blaine assured him. “David’s a nice guy and he’s been alone for far too long.”
“Is there really such thing?” Kurt murmured softly to himself.
“Pardon?”
Kurt exhaled, meeting his eyes with a weighted glance. “Sorry,” he apologized. “I just… personal stuff.”
Blaine looked mildly offended. “We’re friends, Kurt,” he reminded him. “You can talk to me about anything.”
Not anything - and certainly not that.
“It’s nothing,” Kurt lied. “Just my family and friends trying to interfere where they’re not wanted.”
Blaine’s face fell. “I’m sure they’re just trying to help.”
Kurt gritted his teeth. “Maybe I don’t need their help.” And that’s why we really shouldn’t talk about this.
“I’m sure-“
“Blaine,” Kurt cut him off evenly. “It’s fine.
Blaine huffed. “You know, I just wish that I had family and friends who cared enough about me to try, but you know.”
Kurt instantly felt guilt wash through him at Blaine’s words and he felt himself speechless. He had no idea - of course he didn’t. Deep down, he didn’t know Blaine at all. He had no idea what to say.
So he didn’t say anything. He simply slid a hand across the table and placed it carefully over Blaine’s. Blaine didn’t say anything at the gesture but his shoulders which had tensed up on the admission sagged with visible relief.
“When I was in high school,” Kurt began softly, “all I wanted was to go to New York and study musical theatre with my best friend. But she got married and decided to settle down here, and my dad got cancer. It was supposed to be fine but then he had all this treatment and my step mom was always working and my brother was busy making a family of his own, so I stayed. I studied at the local university and got a degree in education and then got a job at Dalton. My dad’s supposedly in remission but all the treatments taken its toll on him and he’s tired and sick all the time, his immune system is constantly down and the doctor’s say there’s a high chance of the cancer coming back.”
“Oh, Kurt…” Blaine breathed, his eyes wide and full of sympathy. He gave his hand a soft squeeze and Kurt felt it, warmth spreading through his arm and chest and heart.
“They say I should go to New York anyway,” Kurt went on. “But I don’t know if I still can. I don’t know if it’s too late, and I don’t want to leave my dad. They need me here.”
“But it’s killing you,” Blaine finished gently. “Waiting for your dad to die.”
The words were hard to hear, but they were the truth. How Blaine knew it, Kurt wasn’t sure, but he nodded in admission, keeping his eyes on the wooden table beneath their still linked hands.
“I don’t know what to tell you,” Blaine admitted.
“Please don’t tell me anything,” Kurt chuckled quietly. “I have about ten different people’s opinions and I don’t even know what my own thoughts are anymore.”
Blaine squeezed his hand gently and gave him a soft smile. “Okay,” he settled. “Whatever you need.”
“Thanks,” Kurt breathed out gratefully.
“What are friends for?”
--
For the rest of the afternoon, they switched to talking about lighter topics and Kurt found that he and Blaine had more in common than they thought, other than the job and the interest in music. They both enjoyed fashion (which Kurt couldn’t believe, considering the way Blaine dressed) and yes, music, and theatre and TV shows. It was nice to talk to someone about these things. He and Tina had quite different tastes and it was a wonder their relationship had lasted so long.
He and Blaine talked and talked and talked and never seemed to run out of things to discuss. By the time the sun set outside, they realized they had been in there for hours and Blaine shyly proposed they continue talking the next day.
And they did - and then the day after that, and the day after that.
The next two weeks passed and going to coffee after school had cemented itself as a tradition of sorts. Tina was awfully cocky about it, but thankfully refrained from outright saying anything.
The subtle implications, however, were endless.
She had been in an especially good mood lately, ever since her date with David. Apparently he had brought her the most gorgeous flowers and they had gone to see a movie and had dinner and it was perfect. They were going out again this weekend.
(Blaine never once said I told you so but the way he smirked whenever Tina brought him up said just about as much).
And as time slowly passed, Kurt had accepted Blaine as a true friend and was fully ready to put their past behind him. Sure, Blaine had done a dickish thing, and he might even still be doing it to others, but he was a good guy, he really was. He was sweet and funny and smart and he cared, wholly and without selfish agenda.
And to Kurt, that might be his favourite thing about him of all.
--
The second time Blaine walked into Warblers rehearsal, Kurt was actually expecting it. Blaine had brought it up at one of their coffee outings (not a date not a date, Tina, not a date), admitting with a blush that he didn’t think Kurt had really enjoyed his presence. Kurt assured him that he had just been jealous. The kids had never responded that enthusiastically to him.
So Blaine said that he would stop by again sometime, if Kurt didn’t mind. And Kurt promised that he really didn’t, and he would be a lot nicer this time.
It all actually went pretty well. Blaine watched the rehearsal with keen interest, complimenting the guys on the routine they had been working on. He clapped enthusiastically and teased that it was almost as good as what he had done in his “glory days”.
“You should show us then,” one of the boys teased back and all the others cheered loudly in response.
“I wouldn’t want to intrude,” Blaine said.
“It’s fine!” one of the boys insisted and Kurt fought the urge to roll his eyes. Who was teaching this class again?
“Well,” Blaine smirked. “I will sing with you - but only if your lovely instructor will sing with me.” And then he shot Kurt a wink and Kurt felt his cheeks burn.
“Oho no,” Kurt chuckled as the boys all turned to him with wide pleading eyes.
“Please, Mr H,” Jeff begged.
“You never sing for us,” Trent piped up.
“Come on, Kurt,” Blaine prompted, eyes wide and hopeful, glittering with plead and oh he was giving him those eyes. Kurt felt a shiver of memory roll through him as he recalled Blaine on his knees.
Did I do something wrong?
Cheeks pink, Kurt shook the memory off and then forced himself to nod.
“Okay,” he found himself agreeing, “one song.”
The rest of the room erupted into cheers and he wondered what he had gotten himself into.
“Excellent,” Blaine beamed, shocking Kurt by grabbing his hand and towing him over to the piano. Blaine slipped onto the stool and gestured for Kurt to sit beside him. He did so reluctantly. There was very minimal room on the small stool. He suppressed a shiver as their bodies fit against each other, the heat of Blaine’s body thrumming through the barrier of his clothes. Kurt tried not to remember how well they had always fit together, how warm Blaine’s body felt pressed against him, all naked skin and stammering pulses, the way his cheeks flushed when Kurt was inside of him and his lips parted-
“I have just the song,” Blaine told him with that same blinding smile as his fingers struck up a melody against the keys. It took Kurt a moment to recognize the song since he generally knew it on guitar but when he did he felt a flare of panic shoot up his spine. Blaine’s eyes were dark as they fixed on his, his voice low and seductive as he began to sing.
I was fine just a guy living on my own
Waiting for the sky to fall
Then you came and changed it all, though…
--
Kurt managed to make it through the whole song without faltering under Blaine’s heavy gaze, although it did brighten a little when he heard his voice. He realized that he had never heard him sing before.
And neither, apparently, had his students, who all cheered loudly for him when they were done and told him he wasn’t going to get away with not singing for them anymore. Kurt blushed under the guise of their praise and shooed them out when their rehearsal time was up. Blaine, however, stayed behind.
Kurt moved to his desk to pack up his things but Blaine wasn’t going to let him get away that easily. He addressed him with a voice full of genuine praise and Kurt felt his cheeks get a little hotter as he spoke.
“I had… no idea you could sing like that,” Blaine sounded a little breathless but very pleased, “you have an amazing voice, Kurt.”
Kurt let out a little hum, not quite able to meet Blaine’s eye. Accepting compliments was something he’d always struggled a bit with.
“Apparently not good enough for college but you know, thanks,” he ended up blurting out. Blaine looked slightly affronted.
“What do you mean?”
“The reason I didn’t go to New York in the first place, wasn’t because of my dad’s health,” Kurt admitted, cheeks flooded with colour now at the admission. “It was because I auditioned for NYADA but didn’t get in. Rachel didn’t get in either. We both planned to go to New York on our own and re apply and try and get jobs or get in somewhere else in the meantime but then Finn proposed and Dad got sick and…” Kurt let the rest of the words hang silently in the air. Blaine knew the rest. He still looked shocked, though, and slightly… well, sympathetic.
“I’m sorry, Kurt,” Blaine told him, eyes wide and full and earnest, and Kurt hated pity, he really did, but he that that wasn’t what Blaine meant. He was genuinely sorry that it happened.
Kurt’s heart fluttered and he hated the warmth that spread through his chest. He wasn’t supposed to think of Blaine like that, he knew it. But sometimes it was hard to suppress the thought that if Blaine had stayed that morning they could have gotten to know each other better, and Kurt could have really fallen for him.
He couldn’t let himself admit that in spite of everything, he probably already had.
“It’s fine,” Kurt dismissed but Blaine was moving towards him with those gentle eyes, reaching out to him and Kurt’s heart was racing. He pulled him into a hug, pressing his warm chest to Kurt’s, his arms wrapping around him just tightly enough to be comforting, his hands broad against his back, so close and there and Kurt had never felt safer, even though he knew this was dangerous territory.
He wanted to cry at the want that ached in his chest. He had been trying to push it down for weeks now but it was still there, gnawing at him whenever Blaine caught his eye in the hall or winked or smiled or held the door open for him or ordered his coffee for him because he knew just how he liked it.
And now Blaine was right there and Kurt wanted nothing more than to force Blaine to look up and kiss him on the mouth.
When Blaine pulled back after what felt like an adage, his eyes were still wearing that soft, earnest stare, but there was a darker tint to them now, a hint of something that Kurt felt he understood and hoped to everything wasn’t just wishful thinking on his part.
“B-Blaine…” Kurt whispered warningly but Blaine just came up to caress his cheek, eyes still wide and fixed on his.
“Tell me to stop,” Blaine breathed and Kurt waited a moment, swallowing the lump in his throat before he managed a meak shake of his head.
“I don’t want you to,” he confessed quietly. Blaine was still for a moment before he whispered back.
“I don’t want to either.”
--
part 5