Reading while walking is dangerous!
Title: Organization XIII goes to the Mall
Author: The story isn’t available anymore, and I was so dumb for not writing down the author. Well, it was on Quizilla, so if anyone finds it, tell me.
Rating:
/> One for the OOC-ness, one for the fact that Axel has a cat, and the last for making Organization XIII look like they really have nothing to do all day in TWTNW.
Full Name (including any titles): Axel, Demyx, Zexion, Marluxia, oh what the heck, all of Organization XIII.
Full Species(es): Organizationus Look-likeus OOCs
Hair Color (include adjectives): presumed canon
Eye Color (include adjectives): presumed canon
Unusual Markings/Colorations/Physical Features: presumed canon
Special Possessions (if any): Axel has a cat. Nuff’ said.
Origin: The mind of some fangirl
Connections To Canon Characters: They are pod people who are wearing, I quote, “Nobody skins”.
Special Abilities: looking like Organization members
Other Annoying Traits: Zexion knows what a mall is, Demyx is confused all the time, etc.
I Say/Notes: The idea is very overused, and although the grammar is okay, the story is torn to pieces by the OOC-ness.
We open up once again in the place of torture, the sporking theater. Marluxia is already sitting, reading the script, when Axel, Demyx, and a surprisingly soaked Zexion walk in.
Zexion: *death glares at Demyx*
Demyx: Hey, it wasn’t my fault that one of my water clones was in the way when you were reading. I mean, reading while walking is dangerous, you know.
Axel: You should have seen his look! It was so hilarious! *snickers at the thought of it*
Marluxia: *noticing the commotion* What happened?
Axel: *points at Zexion* Mr. Bookworm here was so occupied in his book that he walked right into one of Demyx’s water clones, and got extremely soaked.
Zexion: It doesn’t matter that I’m wet. My book! Look at my book! It’s ruined! *turns to Demyx with a death glare of DOOM* You’ll pay for this…
Axel: Maybe I’ll help dry the pages? *summons chakrams with evil smirk*
Zexion: No, I don’t any more help from you, Axel! *sulks in one of the seats, making it wet*
Axel: Oh well. Now, Marluxia, what’s today’s badfic?
Marluxia: “Organization XIII goes to the mall”. How exciting…
It was a dull day in the World That Never Was. Organization XIII was literally pulling their juvenilely styled hairs out.
Axel: *is insulted* Juvenilely? We’re adults, thank you very much.
Demyx: Literally? *tries pulling his hair out* Ow, that hurts! Why would we want to do that?
Zexion: I’ll help you… *holds up electric razor*
Demyx: Eeep!
Axel: *backs away* Where the hell did you get that?
Most of them enjoyed the peace and quiet that went through the castle. Mostly the elder members enjoyed it. But, the younger members could not contain themselves. They were bored out of their Nobody skins.
All: *gape*
Axel: Let’s please move on.
Zexion: *out of spite* Demyx, they’re going to make a coat out of your skin…
Demyx: *shocked*
There was never anything to do around the World That Never was lately, making it become the dullest world to them.
The older members were enjoying themselves in the lobby of the Castle.
Axel: For the last time, people, WE DO NOT LIVE IN CASTLE OBLIVION!!! *zapped for caps lock abuse*
Vexen sat on the couch, drinking newly brewed coffee. Lexaeus was playing cards with Luxord and Xaldin, peering over his cards and watching Luxord concentrate on the game and Xaldin peer at Luxord as well. Xigbar had a pair of headphones on his ears, playing the song “Paradise City.”
Marluxia: Since when does Xigbar have an MP3 player?
Axel: Ever since everyone went insane and decided to play against Luxord. I mean, we know already, any game against Luxord is 100% going to result in him winning.
Everyone else: *agrees*
Saïx was sitting in the kitchen, cleaning his weapon with its cleaner, while Xenmas was by the kitchen counter, pouring himself the coffee Vexen had brewed up.
Axel: This is the first time I’ve ever heard of Xenmas drinking coffee.
Marluxia: Besides, drinking something that Vexen made…that’s not such a good idea.
Demyx: *as Vexen* Behold! The Nitrous Oxide Coffee That Never Existed! Available at your nearest supermarket!
Quite content and comfortable, the more mature members were not bored at all, with their card games, coffee, and cleaners.
Unfortunately, the younger members were literally watching grass grow.
Demyx: Grow, grass, grow!
Axel: This has got to be the most boring thing in the history of boring things. *burns random grass*
Demyx: Hey, I was watching that!
Terribly bored, most of them annoyed the other, making the annoyer a little occupied. Zexion was probably the one that didn’t mind the silence. He was slouched in a lavender recliner, reading a book quietly to himself. His reading glasses were almost at the tip of his nose, falling off.
Zexion: I DO NOT HAVE READING GLASSES, PEOPLE!!! *is zapped this time for the abuse of the caps lock. The caps lock needs to go to a psychiatrist now.*
He poked them back up to the top of his nose and continued reading. Demyx, who was rather upset due to the broken string on his sitar, was spinning around in a computer chair, burying his head into his hands to prevent him from becoming dizzy. Larxene had a bouncy ball she bounced on the silver wooden floors, making a loud ‘bong’ whenever it hit the floor.
Marluxia: Silver…wooden…floors? *confused*
Axel: I think she means that the wooden floors are colored silver, Marluxia.
Marluxia: But I thought we had white stone floors!
Demyx: Marluxia, there is a place called Fandom Hearts. And in this place, illogic is allowed while logic is illegal.
Marluxia: …oh.
Roxas was slouched on the couch, his head falling off the pillow.
Demyx: Roxas is a zombie! Run for your life!
Marluxia: Now the blood will get everywhere on those nice silver wooden floors. *fake sighs*
He felt like he was about to fall asleep. Marluxia was scribbling on a napkin with his pen that had roses imprinted on them. When he thought he couldn’t get any less bored, his pen ran out of ink. He sighed, but kept the pen due to the design. Axel, who seemed to be the one that was the most bored, was hitting his forehead on the wall,
Axel: …due to the badness of this fic.
which had many pictures, either of bands, doodles they had made, or instead of pictures, their signatures. Axel let out a sigh of boredom, rubbing his forehead. He stood up and pushed Roxas’ forehead with his palm, waking the Key of Destiny immediately.
Axel: *as himself* Key of Destiny, arise and meet your master!
*a random portal opens and Axel is hit on the head with the Oathkeeper*
Axel: Hey! I was just quoting Star Wars!
Roxas: *from the portal* I don’t care, whatever you say that reminds me of You-know-what, I’m going to find you and hit you with a Keyblade, like I just did right now. *portal closes*
Marluxia: And what is You-know-what, by any chance?
Axel: *cringes* Akuroku fics…
“Wake up, Roxas,” Axel said shaking Roxas’ arm. Roxas sat up and let out a yawn, then falling back onto the soft couch pillow that sat behind his head. Axel huffed and crossed his arms, looking at how bored everybody was. His cats, Chaos, rolled under Axel, until his pyro of an owner picked him up and pet him.
Axel: I’m… a freakin’ cat lover!!! What the hell?
Demyx: Awww, Axel is in love with kitties! *is chakram’d*
Zexion: Apparently, Axel is the new Hellboy. *dodges chakrams*
Marluxia: Or maybe he’s the new Alphonse Elric. *is chakram’d*
Axel: I AM NOT A CAT LOVER! *zapped again for the caps lock abuse. The caps lock key needs therapy now*
Zexion: Methinks the Nobody…
Axel: *interrupts* Enough with you and your Shakespearean quotes, already!
He looked at Larxene, who had apparently bounced the ball too high, made the ball go up high enough that it bounced off Marluxia’s head and back to her.
Marluxia: Where was I? On the ceiling? I’m not Xigbar!
Zexion: Actually, I think Xigbar is dressed in your Nobody skin.
Marluxia: *horrible mental imagery*
Axel: You enjoy making everyone suffer, don’t you, Zexion?
Zexion: No, if I did, then I would be Larxene. But, since you have mistreated me (and killed me once), I feel that I am entitled to a little…revenge. *smirks evilly*
Axel: *gets up and sits at the other end of the theater*
The Graceful Assassin flinched his head once the ball hit him, rubbing the spot where a new bump would probably sprout. Larxene covered her mouth, catching her ball in the air.
“You hag!” Marluxia yelled towards Larxene.
Everyone else besides Marluxia: …
Marluxia: Oh sh…
Larxene: *portals in* You called me a WHAT?!!! *kunais, portals out*
Demyx was laughing at the scene, stopping the computer chair, noticing how dizzy he was. Axel made a glance at Zexion who was half way done with his book. The Cloaked Schemer noticed Axel staring at him and put his book down in front of his knees. His knees were up to his chest.
“What do you want Axel?” Zexion said only above a whisper but in a deep, gothic like voice. “It’s not everyday you stare at me like that.”
Axel: *chokes on soda*
Zexion: *chokes on air*
Marluxia: Well, this suddenly got more interesting. *is chakram’d and lexicon’d*
“What are you reading?” Axel asked, tilting his head, trying to find a title. He put his cat onto his shoulder, letting the cat crawl around on his shoulders.
“A book,” Zexion told him, returning to the chapter he stopped on. He flipped the page that started a new one.
Zexion: Wave to the IC, kids!
All: *wave*
Axel: And now see how the IC is horribly mutilated by the OOCs. Wave bye-bye to the IC, kids!
Everyone but Zexion: *waves*
“Don’t you have anything better to do?” Axel asked, ruffling his hair.
Axel: I hope that it’s the cat’s hair I’m ruffling. Or my own. No way am I touching Zexion’s greasy locks!
Zexion: My hair’s not greasy! I’m not Snape! And I don’t like being touched!
Axel: What about the scene with you and Xigbar, huh?
Zexion: *twitches* I felt extremely uncomfortable when he did that!
Axel: Sure you did. *is lexicon’d from the other side of the theater*
Demyx and Marluxia: *pretend that nothing happened*
-snip- The Organization members are bored, blah blah, and they start to offer ideas on where to go. Hooray.
Axel: *to fourth wall* Why couldn’t you take out the uncomfortable scene with me and Zexion, huh?
Because it was funny. Now deal with it.
Axel: *muttermutterstupidfourthwallmuttermutter*
Demyx sat up. It was his queue now.
Demyx: It’s supposed to be “cue”. And what does queue mean anyways?
Zexion: queue: 1. a braid of hair worn hanging down behind, 2. a line of people waiting for something.
Demyx: Do you have the dictionary memorized or something?
Zexion: Yes. Why are you so surprised?
Demyx: *mutters to himself* Wow, you are a bookworm.
Zexion: AM NOT!
“How ‘bout we go out somewhere?” Demyx suggested. “Maybe a concert?”
“No good bands are playing,” Roxas reminded him. “How about we go see a movie?”
“We can turn on a movie here anytime,” Marluxia told him, “We want to do something outside of the castle. How about we go to a greenhouse?”
“Flowers?” Demyx said, “Since when do you see all of us crazy over them?”
Marluxia dropped his shoulders. He was the only one that really did have a fetish over flowers.
Demyx: Yes, he was the only one who had a flower fetish. Our very own Marluxia. Ever since he was a small child…
Marluxia: *summons scythe and holds it at Demyx’s neck* You can stop now.
Demyx: Yep, I’m done now!
“We got to find a place Xemnas might actually approve of, though,” Roxas told them, “He’s picky with where we go.”
“Screw that,” Axel said, “Anymore suggestions? Zexion?”
Zexion, who was quite content with his book, looked up from his page.
“A mall?” He suggested.
Larxene stopped bouncing the brightly colored ball and looked at Zexion.
“A what?” Demyx asked, confused, like always.
Demyx: I’m not confused all the time! Hey, not even in canon I was confused!
Axel: *as KH2 Demyx* Roxas, come back to us!
Demyx: I wasn’t confused, I actually thought he was Roxas!
Axel: Right after Sora told you that he doesn’t know who that is? *scoffs* Please.
Demyx: *pouts*
Zexion sighed.
“A mall,” He said slowly so all could understand him. “It’s this big building that has a lot of shops in it.”
Larxene’s face brightened. Shops? Like clothing shops? She really needed a new pair of clothes and loved to shop anyways.
Axel: The OOC! It burns! *shields eyes*
Zexion: Since when does Larxene love to shop?
“Huh,” Axel said, not confused but interested, “Everybody agree? Mall?”
They all looked at each other, nodding. Axel sighed in relief. Finally something to do!
Axel: My name is Axel. You killed my IC. Prepare to die. *destroys theater for the heck of it*
*luckily, the concession stand is spared. Everyone else is smoldering except Axel and Demyx, of course*
Zexion: You know, I’m going to get my revenge on this author, then I’m going to make Demyx’s and your life completely miserable, Axel.
Axel: Well, at least you’re dry now. *smirks*
Zexion: *realizes that his book is burned to a crisp* Axel, you are so going down…
Demyx: Uh…love to stay and chat, but…bye! *teleports out hurryingly*
Marluxia: Okay, see you people! *teleports out*
*Axel and Zexion start fighting, but not before the caps lock became angry and beat the heck out of each of them for ruining its life*
CAPS LOCK: WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP ALREADY! I’M GOING TO SEE MY THERAPIST NOW. *leaves*
Axel: Was it just me, or did we just gotten beat up by a caps lock key?
Zexion: No, you’re not imagining. Unfortunately.
*Both teleport out*