( Read more... )

My cell phone rang.

If I was a rich girl, na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na!

"Hello," I answered. The caller ID was a number I had never seen before.

"Yo, dis be Paul. If you has a problem wit me then get yo ass outside right now and say it to my face, bitch! I was astounded by the lack of grammatical skill and ( Read more... )

It was lighter outside, although the sun was nowhere to be seen. White flakes were break-dancing in the fierce, twirling wind like whirling dervishes in this fog of fear. It was snowing like hell, is basically what I'm trying to say.

Hunger struck me in the gut, like a baboon ninja. I had just awakened and it was 11:30 A.M. "Ugh!" I cried.

" ( Read more... )

Well well well, if it isn't LiveJournal.

I got a paper route to make some extra money.


( Read more... )

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Jonny!

1. Three seagulls flying overhead are a warning that Jonny is near.
2. Jonny is black with white stripes, not white with black stripes.
3. The liquid inside Jonny can be used as a substitute for blood plasma!
4. Jonny cannot burp - there is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in his stomach.
5. The colour of Jonny is no indication ( Read more... )

It's been a busy week. As you probably know, last weekend was Christmas and Saturday, Sunday, and Monday was spent with mostly my family. Christmas is not about Santa, or snow, or furry little animals, or Jesus. It's about the presents. The gift certificates and presents will do me nicely ( Read more... )

Today I won $9.00 from the chess tournament and I won 1st place in my section for the 2005 Wisconsin chess tour, so I won another $61.60 . Ka-Boom Ka-Boom.

Please remove paper jam is what the copier kept saying.

"You dirty, dirty son of a bitch..." I muttered. The copier is a piece of crap NP6450 and gets jammed all the time. "How would you like to be jammed with some dynamite?I looked for another copier to use, and that's when I saw her. Right by the Worker's Comp department. She was sending a ( Read more... )

Time is the flame sucking the life out of you.

The wind is always against me. My eyes are crescent moons and the fire won't stop reflecting off them. The coals of hatred are kept lit.

I would kill the stars in the sky if I could

I am so mad.

The heart is pumping emotions. I cry and I know my tears are red.

Am I dead ( Read more... )

It seemed as though I left my house quite suddenly. It feels like I'm forgetting something.

I shrugged it off and walked down the sidewalk, ready to devour the world. "I'm going to have a World Sandwich, baby!" I shouted in all confidence. Someone nearby saw me and jumped out of the way in a startled fashion. Intimidation is a powerful thing ( Read more... )