I stopped by da Untied Nations building today, and Colon Bowel started doing his impersonation of me, and h'everybody was laughing. What's so funny?

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Dat kid is trying really hard to 'produce' Paul Martini's next speech, but babyfood can only travel so fast you know.

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"Let's just solve the India/Pakistan diplomatic problem by EATING the Pakistani Foreign Minister!" Way to go, you guy...

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BUSH: "Hey, howzabout lettin ME drive?"
HELMSMAN: "I'm sorry sir, but the Captain said no. You've still got a suspended liscence from that DWI thing, and he's worried you might end up wrapping the Carrier around a lighthouse."

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I'll give a shiney new toonie to the first one who can guess which one of these was Sheila Copps' ORIGINAL chin! I tink she's been habbing an affair with BOB VILAS, because dhere seems to habe been a lot of remodelling going on 'ere.

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"HEY, didn't you play La MANUEL on FAWLTY TOWERS?!"

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APPY NEW HEAR my little underthings!
Damn! I forgotted to raise da price of STAMPS before Christmas! Oh well...
Back to da shoveling of da merde for moi!

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I did NOT say he was a moron. I said he was a MORMON! Geez....
Could a moron go from grade one level reading to grade three in just ONE year?
(Although, personally, I tink dhey just kick him out of da class because his butt, she was gedding too big for da CHAIRS in dat classroom.)

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Somebody pull my feenger, so dat I can give dhese 'revolting' back bencher guys a taste of party discipline.

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"Hey, you got some NICE LEGS dhere, Toots!"

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