Another INFJ post - I am too curious for your feedback (intuitive communication)

[orange_coat]

NF who is once again curious for your NT perspective. Here is a post which I copy-pasted from the INFJ comm:

Comments

[janne]

Comments restricted to INFJ's only on that post... SIC

[orange_coat]

Oh really? I just posted the link because I didn't want it to look like I was trying to convert anyone toward F-ness.

I think I can copy-paste the post here under a cut.

[janne]

Clarification for the non-telepaths: The post can be read all right, but the comment code states that only members of the INFJ community can comment on it. ("Sorry, you are not a member of infj, and commenting is restricted to members only.")
This amuses me greatly on a post about failures to communicate.

[jeroentiggelman]

I just posted the link because I didn't want it to look like I was trying to convert anyone toward F-ness.

Fear of being suspected of hidden motives getting in the way of communication alright, there.. :D

I actually would not care if you did want to convert me to "F-ness".

Your influence on someone who is pretty sure of who they are might be more limited than you might imagine. :P

[divinejustice]

Whoever wrote this is either bad with their intuition or just assuming too many people are bad with it. Just depends how keen the people communicating are. You learn how to use the N as you go on.

[healthnut22]

Yes, I have to agree. I have never really thought that my intuition made me bad with communication. Almost the contrary.

[divinejustice]

Yes, it allows you to pick up on subtlety... Ironically, the subtitles used by Ns might be over the heads of many Ss.

[healthnut22]

Hmm. That's an interesting thought! Good point.

...It does allow for some excellent situations though, like when you want that extra subtlety when you're talking to another intuitive to spice it up and make it seem intelligent, or you want to flirt in a good way.... I dunno. :) I should probably back up the flirting bit with some successful relationships that have come out of it, before really touting that one. Hehe.

[indicolite]

I honestly think that miscommunication comes about only when an intuitive tries to squeeze in some indirect or manipulative or hidden motive of some kind.

Nah, there's another option: they may just be stupid. "Who needs conspiracy [even in your own head] when stupidity can explain so much?" as Goethe remarked. And despite what we may sometimes believe, being N, NT, or even INTJ does not preclude you from being stupid.

I've had miscommunication with my iNtuitive friends frequently due to them or myself not stopping to make sure that their motives, or the patterns that they see, are well-conveyed.

A lot of the problems with iNtuitive communication I recognized in points 2, 5, 10, and 11 particularly of The Devil's Guide to Spreadsheet Creation (not only are spreadsheets communication, but miscommunication in their case can be quite concretely measured; in millions of dollars in loss, sometimes).

~ENTP

[m_danson]

I recommend Gifts Differing: Understanding Personality Type by Isabel Briggs Myers as it is obvious that you have never read it.

[carissa_lynn]

I don't really have that problem. People usually know exactly what I am thinking even if I don't tell them because it is written clearly on my face.

I also think this person doesn't understand myers briggs at all and is confusing intuition with feeling. Both INTJ and INFJ use intuition to take in and process information but act outwardly on what they think or feel.

I honestly think that miscommunication comes about only when an intuitive tries to squeeze in some indirect or manipulative or hidden motive of some kind. It's like a fear-based control attempt, maybe.

This statement, like most of the post, is all about feelings.