application
Application for Spock son of Sarek son of Skon:
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I do not consume animal products, but there is a cheese-like substance produced on Vulcan that I find aesthetically pleasing. It is called Xch'edr.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Vulcans long ago set aside their violent natures in order to live lives of peace and logic. But if I had inadvertently inhaled the pollen of some alien plant which had the effect of overcoming all of my discipline and inhibitions, the odds are 2.735 to 1 that I would immediately exterminate that unpleasant purple being. I find it most illogical. Perhaps it would get along well with Dr. McCoy...
3. What time is it where you are?
Stardate 5874.3.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
I do not understand this human obsession with the rituals of mating. Furthermore, I am not Albus Dumbledore and there is no possibility that I will become him.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Ethanol is a poison, and it is unethical and illogical to encourage or abet another's desire to imbibe it. Also humans are irrational enough while they are not under its influence.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Logically such a decision should be made by the parents of the interested parties. Young people are generally too immature to make a reasoned choice.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
If you can not fill out your paperwork in an efficient manner, you should delegate the matter to a yeoman. Captain Kirk also has this problem, and all he is required to do is read the documents and sign the PADD.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I am the First Officer and Science Officer aboard a Constitution class starship dedicated to seeking out new lifeforms and new civilizations. I am also a class A7 computer expert, physically stronger than most humanoid species, and can play the Vulcan harp.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
I would be most gratified to provide any interested party with an English language copy of the Lectures of Surak. If you have no interest in pursuing a logical lifestyle, I can attempt to teach you the Vulcan nerve pinch, although I am told this is nearly impossible for a human to learn. Or I will offer you some of Dr. McCoy's contraband Romulan ale.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I do not consume animal products, but there is a cheese-like substance produced on Vulcan that I find aesthetically pleasing. It is called Xch'edr.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Vulcans long ago set aside their violent natures in order to live lives of peace and logic. But if I had inadvertently inhaled the pollen of some alien plant which had the effect of overcoming all of my discipline and inhibitions, the odds are 2.735 to 1 that I would immediately exterminate that unpleasant purple being. I find it most illogical. Perhaps it would get along well with Dr. McCoy...
3. What time is it where you are?
Stardate 5874.3.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
I do not understand this human obsession with the rituals of mating. Furthermore, I am not Albus Dumbledore and there is no possibility that I will become him.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Ethanol is a poison, and it is unethical and illogical to encourage or abet another's desire to imbibe it. Also humans are irrational enough while they are not under its influence.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Logically such a decision should be made by the parents of the interested parties. Young people are generally too immature to make a reasoned choice.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
If you can not fill out your paperwork in an efficient manner, you should delegate the matter to a yeoman. Captain Kirk also has this problem, and all he is required to do is read the documents and sign the PADD.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I am the First Officer and Science Officer aboard a Constitution class starship dedicated to seeking out new lifeforms and new civilizations. I am also a class A7 computer expert, physically stronger than most humanoid species, and can play the Vulcan harp.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
I would be most gratified to provide any interested party with an English language copy of the Lectures of Surak. If you have no interest in pursuing a logical lifestyle, I can attempt to teach you the Vulcan nerve pinch, although I am told this is nearly impossible for a human to learn. Or I will offer you some of Dr. McCoy's contraband Romulan ale.