why is it that I'M feeling stupid? He is the one who didnt tell her anything. She doesnt know I exist. She doesnt know that he has a girlfriend that he loves, and wants to marry, and its ME. She has no clue ( Read more... )

                                                           Ink spills from the tip of my pen as I gently scratch it against paper. I re-live the memory of that night. The night I lost my best friend, my hero. I try to stay focused on writting the letters in order to form the emotion that I was feeling. Voices swirl around me, conversations are in ( Read more... )

Damn, Yet again, it takes me forever to get back on here and let everyone know what's up...

Im sorry...

Anyways, here's what's going on:

- Ryan is still in TX (i did get to see him graduate BMT in Jan.)

- I still work both jobs

- I still sit at Rams Horn every night

- I miss Ryan like no other

I guess things are going just fine. Besides my every ( Read more... )

Well would you look-y here. Its LJ. It's been a while my friends, a long while ( Read more... )

So, he leaves in 12 days for basic training for the Air Force. TWELVE DAYS... and then I dont even get to hear his voice for 6 weeks. January 6th is when I can hear his voice, and see him. i dont know what I'm going to do. I will tough it out for sure... but damn will it be hard. holy FUCK ( Read more... )

Well well well... Again it's been a long long time since I was on here...

here goes the updates:

eh hem..

Well I was thinking of getting back together with Dave a while back, and then i smacked myself in the face and was like WHAT THE FUUUCK am I thinking?!! So *whew* I didnt do that. Umm, I was hanging out with my crew that ( Read more... )

rescue me ( Read more... )

Kevin left for Afganistan today. He's going to be deployed for 18 months ( Read more... )

I just want it all back.

why do i do this to myself.

i just want to be those people in my icon with him. i want that to be us again.

mother fucker.

This could be an opportunity ( Read more... )