The Guardian's Secret (7/?)
Title: The Guardian's Secret 7/?
Author: Hezikiah
Disclaimer: Not mine, the BBC's.
Rating: PG
Characters: Ella (OC), Donna, Eighth Doctor, Healer Koray (OC), Healer Akakios (OC)
Warnings: None
Summary: Sequel to " Witnessing the Protector," five years on. When the metacrisis begins to unravel on its own, a desperate Ella finds the Doctor...and winds up giving up more than she bargained for to save her best friend's life.
Author's Note: Sorry for the delay in posting. Life, ya know? There's a lot of important setup between Koray and Ella that will come into play later on, so I'm sorry if that seems a little dull. I did have a ton of fun writing Ella's rant, though. I felt like the poor girl deserved it! Also, if you know Shinedown's song "I Dare You," that's what gave me some inspiration for Ella's emotions for dealing with Koray and for what's about to come with the Council. The song's angry, sarcastic tone is really what's going on in her mind right now.
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
Aug. 20, 2016
The first thing I remember this morning was the sound of someone knocking on the door. I groaned and emerged from under the pile of blankets, stumbling to my feet. I had a monster of a headache and the floor had an annoying tendency of spinning as I staggered towards the door. The Doctor was on the other side when I opened it and I leaned against the doorframe so I wouldn't fall over. “You've been asleep for almost twelve hours. Are you ok? ”
“I feel hungover.”
A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Really? That's the first time I've ever heard anyone compare pregnancy to the aftermath of a night of heavy drinking.”
I rubbed my eyes and shook my head. “Nope, pregnancy makes you want to drink. The irony is that you can't. It's a cruel world.”
“Oh, not always. Now, are you hungry?”
Just the thought of food made me feel like I was going to be sick and I realized what was troubling me. “No,” I mumbled. “Morning sickness already, oh goody.”
I wasn't looking at him, but I could hear the frown in his voice. “You barely ate anything last night. Go on back to bed and I'll bring you some crackers and Baelian root tea. It's guaranteed to knock out morning sickness and settle your stomach.”
I took a deep breath. “I'll be ok soon enough. You really don't have to do this, Doctor.”
He put his hands on my shoulders, turned me around, and propelled me towards the bed. “Nonsense, I want to. It's partially my fault that you're sick.”
I held back a laugh and didn't voice my thoughts. It's not like you're the one who knocked me up.
Laying down again was heavenly and I'd almost fallen back asleep when I heard the clatter of a teacup and the Doctor appeared with a small tray. He told me to sit up and handed me a mug filled with something that smelled like root beer, of all things, but tasted slightly more bitter. I choked it down with a few saltine crackers and was astounded when my nausea and headache lessened within a few moments. “You should market this stuff on earth. You'd make a fortune.”
“Well, it does become pretty popular from the twenty-fifth century onwards.”
“You mean it takes another four hundred years to cure morning sickness? That's a depressing thought.”
He was interrupted when there was a far-off banging sound. I barely heard it, but he paced towards the door. “We've got some company. I'll be back.”
I finished the crackers and settled back in bed, resting my hands on my stomach. The nausea had passed, but I still felt drained and my emotions were running all over the place. A large part of me wanted me to curl into a tiny ball and just cry. The problem was that my mind and body were in discord. My body was still going through the shock of what had happened the day before. The rational side of my brain knew crying wouldn't do any good. There was no turning back now and I may as well get over the fact that I was pregnant and just move on. I compromised by rolling onto my side and hugging a pillow to my chest, taking several deep breaths to ward off my tears. I missed Brian, I missed my son, and I felt very alone.
I heard the sound of voices and footsteps approaching and that surprised me. The Doctor had let someone into the TARDIS. I didn't really want to move and I'm glad I didn't because I could hear an argument going on, the kind that's made in hushed tones meant to prevent someone from hearing. The Doctor seemed to have forgotten that sound carries pretty well in the TARDIS (I also have good hearing, I think it comes from being a mom of a small child).
“...traveled with humans for centuries and I've lived on Earth. I know them and what they're physically and mentally capable of. The Council doesn't! For Rassilon's sake, no. She's still recovering from yesterday! What they're asking for is too much right now,” I heard the Doctor say. He sounded angry.
“Maybe you should have thought of that before you brought that human woman into this situation, Doctor.” That voice was familiar and I bit my lip. What was she doing here?! It was Healer Koray and even I could hear the ice in her voice. She was obviously not happy with the Doctor. “You could have left her on earth.”
I heard a snort of derision. “That wasn't an option! My future self appointed her to watch out for Donna and I'm in no position to countermand his wishes, not without understanding his reasons why.”
“Friends,” I heard a gentle, placating third voice chime in, Akakios'. “Arguing is pointless now. We have our orders, Doctor, and we must obey them.”
“I just thought there'd be more time.” I almost didn't hear the Doctor say those words, they were so quiet.
“We all did,” Akakios replied.
The voices grew closer and for some reason, I wanted to hide under the covers, just throw them over my head and refuse to come out. I knew I was being irrational and immature, but I didn't care. I wanted to go home and be with my family, not stuck on Gallifrey with a bunch of crazy Time Lords who looked like humans on the outside, but were so very, very different once you got to know them.
I didn't hide, but I curled up into even a tighter ball and started shaking. I don't know why I was so afraid, though it was probably my out-of-control emotions. I was scared and confused. What did the High Council want with me? I wasn't anyone special. The thought of facing a room of those imposing Time Lords was frightening. I felt a wave of homesickness. I wanted to go home.
The aforementioned Time Lords entered my room and there was silence for a moment. I imagined I must have looked somewhat ridiculous then, just a trembling puddle of frightened human being.
The mattress dipped as someone sat down behind me on the bed and a hand touched my side. “Ella?” It was the Doctor. “I know you're still not feeling well from the procedure, but we've all been ordered to a special hearing that the High Council has called. That includes you.”
I didn't turned over. “Why me? I'm not a Time Lord.”
“No, but you are Donna Temple-Noble's guardian and she was subpoened as well,” Akakios replied. “Obviously, she cannot speak for herself and you have been commanded to speak for her, as her advocate.”
That made me roll onto my back and my eyes went wide in surprise when I saw Healers Akakios and Koray. They were dressed in the strangest full length robes with long sleeves. They wore a sort of skull cap with a crazy collar that flared over their shoulders and up behind their heads, forming a half circle with half moon cutouts at the top and the shoulders. Akakios' costume was deep scarlet and gold, Koray's was heliotrope (kind of a pinkish-purple). I'd been wondering how long it would take before I really felt like I was surrounded by aliens. This was definitely it.
The Doctor caught the startled look on my face and he explained, “That's Time Lord ceremonial dress, Ella. We only wear it when summoned to Council.”
I took a deep breath, trying to calm down and feeling frustrated with myself. I really didn't have much control over my emotions. “Oh, similar to how I only wear my doctoral regalia to graduation.”
He gave me a small smile and nodded. “Something like that, yes.”
Healer Koray strode closer to me and crossed her arms, a scowl on her lined face. I couldn't tell whom she was mad at: the Council or the Doctor. I suspected it was both. “You must appear in her stead, Ella Steinfield. I objected to your presence at Council, not only because you are still recovering from yesterday, but you are unGallifreyan and the Doctor could stand as Mrs. Temple-Noble's proxy. However...” she trailed off and sniffed once, “our illustrious Madame President insisted that you appear as you are more familiar with the woman than this incarnation of the Doctor. You will accompany us to the Panopticon.”
I didn't want to go anywhere at that point, I felt so tired (despite having slept all night). Koray's comment about me being “unGallifreyan” and her implications that I didn't belong at their silly Council made me more than a little angry. Combined with my rollercoaster emotions, it's no wonder that I sat up and growled, “Stop treating me like I'm some kind of inferior being! I know the Time Lords are superior in just about every way imaginable. My god, you've mastered space and time!” I clapped my hands super slow in a sarcastic gesture. “Well, bravo for you! Have a cigar on me from the rest of the universe! The Doctor ...well, his future self at least, showed me things that changed my perspective of the world forever. I know that as race, you're amazing and clever and worth my awe. I get that, but that doesn't change that fact that I'm a sentient being, too, and pretty damn smart where I come from, thank you. I've shown you nothing but respect, Healer Koray. Don't I deserve the same in kind?! If you're not going to respect me, then I won't have you anywhere near me during this pregnancy because I will not allow someone whom I don't trust and who doesn't listen to my wishes to care for me or this child. Is that clear?”
There was a long silence. The rant had drained me and I sat there, breathing hard, as I glared at her. She raised an eyebrow and seemed unfazed. The Doctor shared a glance with Akakios and I couldn't see the expression on his face, but Akakios was smiling ever so slightly at me behind Koray's back. He seemed amused.
“I apologize if I made you feel less than welcome,” Koray's intoned her monotone drone, but I could hear the barest touch of contriteness. “I am from a time when other species were not found on Gallifrey. It takes me time to become accustomed to such changes.” She paused. “You are at a disadvantage because there are few healers experienced in managing alien pregnancies due to our prior insular planetary status. Without sounding conceited, I really am the most qualified to care for you, so you're going to have to learn to trust me.”
Koray was telling me she was old and biased and set in her kind's xenophobic ways, but at least acknowledging that was a start. I knew I was going to need her in the days to come if the baby was going to come out healthy, but I didn't know if I could trust her and that scared me. I didn't have a chance to respond, though.
“I hate to interrupt, but we need to hurry,” Akakios urged. “We're expected at Council within the hour.”
Koray grumbled at him about checking on the pregnancy's progress first and all but commanded the men to leave the room. She produced the small device that looked like a mobile from the day before from a hidden pocket in her robe. A memory of pain from when she'd used it before flashed through my mind. The Doctor reached over and squeezed my hand. Although I didn't mean to, I clutched at his fingers, not letting go. I didn't want to be left alone with her. He hesitated, glancing at Koray, who made a shooing motion at him. “It will be all right,” he murmured. “This won't take long. I have to go find some robes that fit me. My last regeneration was a bit shorter than me.”
He got up and left, shutting the door behind him. Koray pushed the covers aside without preamble and pressed her wannabe iPhone against my lower abdomen. Her actions told me that she was still irritated and I got the distinct feeling that I'd joined her little snit-fit, along with the Doctor and the Council. She wasn't exactly gentle, but I refused to flinch.
The device beeped and she glanced it, shaking her head. “Your Progesterone levels are falling. Your body refuses to produce enough hormone to maintain gestation, so we're going to have to keep convincing it that it's supposed to be pregnant until it stops resisting. The Doctor was right when he told me that human bodies could be stubborn. I don't have this issue with Gallifreyans.” She reached back into her pocket, pulled out a hypodermic, and gestured at me to roll onto my side.
She made it sound like it was my fault that my body refused to cooperate and that there was something wrong with me because I was different from her usual patients. I didn't move. I couldn't help it. I was already angry enough, but now I was simply furious, but it didn't manifest in yelling and screaming like you might expect. I'd just had a huge outburst, so instead of shouting, I resolved to the only other way of releasing pent-up emotions. I started crying. These weren't the body-wracking wails of the day before. No, these were silent tears with no sobbing, just a lot of trembling. My fingers fisted into the sheets as my face turned red. I hadn't felt that angry in years. I was actually scaring myself, I was so mad. “I can't help it and I'm sorry that my body is being problematic and I'm sorry that I can't control my emotions right now!”
Koray stood there and I could tell that she wasn't used to being disobeyed, but she also seemed uncomfortable at my tears and the livid look on my face. “There's no need to apologize. This isn't your fault. It's the hormone injections. Dr. Steinfield.” Her voice had become a little softer. “Your emotional equilibrium will stabilize once your body begins to produce them on its own,” she attempted to reassure me. The Doctor had told me the same thing the day before.
“What if it doesn't?! What if my body never gets the message? I hate feeling so out of control.”
“I understand. We'll use injections the whole time if we need to, but I might be able to devise a treatment that will boost your body's hormone production, but we'll have to worry about that later. Let's get this over with or we'll be late for Council and that is not an option.” She gestured again and by the steely look in her eyes, it was obvious that she expected me to comply.
I knew she was right, but it was still hard to just roll over and let her give me the shot. It was only the knowledge that I'd lose the baby if I refused to do so that kept me from telling her no. So, I turned over and bit my lip at the cold rush that shot through my body.
Koray stepped away and picked up a length of scarlet and gold cloth that was draped over the chair. I hadn't noticed its appearance, so one of the Time Lords must have brought it in with them. She held it up and I saw it was an elaborate gown, something that looked like it belonged on a medieval princess. “Akakios brought this for you to wear to Council.”
I sat up and wiped my tears away. “Why can't I wear regular clothes?”
“You heard the Doctor's explanation about ceremonial garb. This was made for you, in the colors of the Prydonian Chapter.”
I shook my head in confusion. “I don't understand. I'm not a Time Lord. Why do I have to wear ceremonial garb, and what's a Prydonian?”
Koray sighed. “I will explain as you dress.”
I got the message. She wasn't going to leave me alone and I was expected to hurry up. I turned my back to her to take my pajamas off, feeling self-conscious, even though she was a healer and had already seen the parts of my body normally reserved for my doctor and Brian. Healer Koray brought the gown over to me and helped me put it on. Besides my wedding gown and that stupid Renaissance dress I'd worn one Halloween in graduate school, it was the fanciest garment I'd ever worn.
As she laced up the back of the dress, she explained that Time Lord society was divided into various Chapters. The color of their robes indicated what Chapter they belonged to. The Doctor and Akakios were Prydonians and wore scarlet and gold. She was a member of the Patrexes Chapter and they wore heliotrope.
Koray further explained that since Donna Temple-Noble held the memories of the Doctor, she was by default a member of the Prydonian Chapter, like him. As I was her appointed guardian, I was also associated with the Prydonian Chapter, and so wore its colors.
Scarlet and gold, I thought as I tightened the gold satin belt around my waist. The buckle was a gold Seal of Rassilon and I felt like everything had gone surreal and I'd walked into a story. Like bloody Harry Potter, this is. Ah well, Gallifrey...Gryffindor...it's all the same color, isn't it?
Koray had only brought me the dress and not any shoes, so I pulled on my battered old trainers that I'd brought with me, grinning to myself because that was a fashion faux pas. You couldn't see my shoes, anyway, because the gown was too long.
We met up with the Doctor and Akakios in the control room. The Doctor was dressed just like Akakios in scarlet and red and he looked distinctly uncomfortable. He tugged at the stiff collar and shifted as we entered the room. “Hate these things,” he muttered as I walked up to him and he smiled. “Well, don't you look nice? Come on, then.”
“What am I supposed to say to them?” I asked as we left the TARDIS and headed out of the medical center. I wrapped my arms around myself, feeling completely lost.
“Donna Temple-Noble suffered great harm as a result of a Time Lord's mistake. We take responsibility for the actions of our kind in linear terms, but this situation is unique in that it happened in our future. You are to petition for redress on her behalf for our people to save her life,” Akakios replied.
“Is that all? But you've already done that. Why do I have to ask now?”
“Protocol must be followed.” That was Koray. “You must make a formal request in front of the High Council.”
There was silence as went outside. This was my first time outside of the building and I was surprised to see a long wooden walkway that passed through a park filled with green trees. There was strange, alien birdsong in the sky. We were heading for a cluster of imposing skyscrapers nearby. I took a deep breath and noticed the air had a distinctly metallic edge to it, like there was steel or tin in the air.
Look at me, I'm a pretty Prydonian...whatever the heck that means.
“There will be questions about how and why this happened to Donna,” the Doctor told me. “Just remember what the Tenth Doctor told you about the Laws of Time.”
“I can't reveal the future, I remember.”
“Yes, but they don't know that you know that. As a human, you're not obliged to follow those laws.”
I stopped and looked at all three of them. “Wait, so you're saying that it's ok for me to break them?”
Akakios coughed once. “I'm not saying that it's acceptable, but unlike a Time Lord, you can choose to ignore those laws. The Council will assume you're ignorant of our rules and volunteer that information freely.”
I sighed. “And I suppose they'll be upset when I invoke those laws and refuse to do so.”
Koray shook her head once. “They will not be pleased, no. However, there isn't much they will be able to do about it.”
We crossed through the park and stopped outside the imposing entrance of a building. Several guards dressed in scarlet uniforms and tight fitting helmets stood outside and straightened as we approached. The Doctor turned to me and put a hand on my shoulder, looking me in the eyes. “This will be a test of your mettle. Humans rarely face the Council and I don't blame you if you're frightened. One thing you should know is that they will know if you're lying to them and that will have serious repercussions.”
I swallowed once as I looked into his blue eyes. “What if I just withhold information? That's not lying exactly.”
He pressed his lips together. “It's possible that could work. It's worked for me, but they'll still know that you're not telling them the whole truth.”
“What can they do to me, really?” I had to know.
There was another silence. “The worst they could do would be to refuse to let you return home,” Koray intoned, “until they are satisfied that you have revealed everything about the metacrisis. That could be for an indefinite amount of time.”
So I would share Donna's fate about being confined to Gallifrey, never to see my family again. The anger I'd felt a short while earlier came roaring back and I was surprised to see the Doctor break into a pleased smile. “Hang on to that anger. You may need use it. I told you yesterday why I thought he chose you, Ella, to advocate for Donna. I think it's because he knows you have the strength and the sheer stubbornness to fight on her behalf. I wouldn't be surprised if you were a lawyer in a parallel world. I know you can do this.”
“I'm glad you think so,” I replied.
Akakios told the guards who we were and we stepped out of the bright light of Gallifrey's twin suns into the cool, metallic darkness of the Panopticon, the meeting place for the High Council of the Time Lords.
Author: Hezikiah
Disclaimer: Not mine, the BBC's.
Rating: PG
Characters: Ella (OC), Donna, Eighth Doctor, Healer Koray (OC), Healer Akakios (OC)
Warnings: None
Summary: Sequel to " Witnessing the Protector," five years on. When the metacrisis begins to unravel on its own, a desperate Ella finds the Doctor...and winds up giving up more than she bargained for to save her best friend's life.
Author's Note: Sorry for the delay in posting. Life, ya know? There's a lot of important setup between Koray and Ella that will come into play later on, so I'm sorry if that seems a little dull. I did have a ton of fun writing Ella's rant, though. I felt like the poor girl deserved it! Also, if you know Shinedown's song "I Dare You," that's what gave me some inspiration for Ella's emotions for dealing with Koray and for what's about to come with the Council. The song's angry, sarcastic tone is really what's going on in her mind right now.
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
Aug. 20, 2016
The first thing I remember this morning was the sound of someone knocking on the door. I groaned and emerged from under the pile of blankets, stumbling to my feet. I had a monster of a headache and the floor had an annoying tendency of spinning as I staggered towards the door. The Doctor was on the other side when I opened it and I leaned against the doorframe so I wouldn't fall over. “You've been asleep for almost twelve hours. Are you ok? ”
“I feel hungover.”
A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Really? That's the first time I've ever heard anyone compare pregnancy to the aftermath of a night of heavy drinking.”
I rubbed my eyes and shook my head. “Nope, pregnancy makes you want to drink. The irony is that you can't. It's a cruel world.”
“Oh, not always. Now, are you hungry?”
Just the thought of food made me feel like I was going to be sick and I realized what was troubling me. “No,” I mumbled. “Morning sickness already, oh goody.”
I wasn't looking at him, but I could hear the frown in his voice. “You barely ate anything last night. Go on back to bed and I'll bring you some crackers and Baelian root tea. It's guaranteed to knock out morning sickness and settle your stomach.”
I took a deep breath. “I'll be ok soon enough. You really don't have to do this, Doctor.”
He put his hands on my shoulders, turned me around, and propelled me towards the bed. “Nonsense, I want to. It's partially my fault that you're sick.”
I held back a laugh and didn't voice my thoughts. It's not like you're the one who knocked me up.
Laying down again was heavenly and I'd almost fallen back asleep when I heard the clatter of a teacup and the Doctor appeared with a small tray. He told me to sit up and handed me a mug filled with something that smelled like root beer, of all things, but tasted slightly more bitter. I choked it down with a few saltine crackers and was astounded when my nausea and headache lessened within a few moments. “You should market this stuff on earth. You'd make a fortune.”
“Well, it does become pretty popular from the twenty-fifth century onwards.”
“You mean it takes another four hundred years to cure morning sickness? That's a depressing thought.”
He was interrupted when there was a far-off banging sound. I barely heard it, but he paced towards the door. “We've got some company. I'll be back.”
I finished the crackers and settled back in bed, resting my hands on my stomach. The nausea had passed, but I still felt drained and my emotions were running all over the place. A large part of me wanted me to curl into a tiny ball and just cry. The problem was that my mind and body were in discord. My body was still going through the shock of what had happened the day before. The rational side of my brain knew crying wouldn't do any good. There was no turning back now and I may as well get over the fact that I was pregnant and just move on. I compromised by rolling onto my side and hugging a pillow to my chest, taking several deep breaths to ward off my tears. I missed Brian, I missed my son, and I felt very alone.
I heard the sound of voices and footsteps approaching and that surprised me. The Doctor had let someone into the TARDIS. I didn't really want to move and I'm glad I didn't because I could hear an argument going on, the kind that's made in hushed tones meant to prevent someone from hearing. The Doctor seemed to have forgotten that sound carries pretty well in the TARDIS (I also have good hearing, I think it comes from being a mom of a small child).
“...traveled with humans for centuries and I've lived on Earth. I know them and what they're physically and mentally capable of. The Council doesn't! For Rassilon's sake, no. She's still recovering from yesterday! What they're asking for is too much right now,” I heard the Doctor say. He sounded angry.
“Maybe you should have thought of that before you brought that human woman into this situation, Doctor.” That voice was familiar and I bit my lip. What was she doing here?! It was Healer Koray and even I could hear the ice in her voice. She was obviously not happy with the Doctor. “You could have left her on earth.”
I heard a snort of derision. “That wasn't an option! My future self appointed her to watch out for Donna and I'm in no position to countermand his wishes, not without understanding his reasons why.”
“Friends,” I heard a gentle, placating third voice chime in, Akakios'. “Arguing is pointless now. We have our orders, Doctor, and we must obey them.”
“I just thought there'd be more time.” I almost didn't hear the Doctor say those words, they were so quiet.
“We all did,” Akakios replied.
The voices grew closer and for some reason, I wanted to hide under the covers, just throw them over my head and refuse to come out. I knew I was being irrational and immature, but I didn't care. I wanted to go home and be with my family, not stuck on Gallifrey with a bunch of crazy Time Lords who looked like humans on the outside, but were so very, very different once you got to know them.
I didn't hide, but I curled up into even a tighter ball and started shaking. I don't know why I was so afraid, though it was probably my out-of-control emotions. I was scared and confused. What did the High Council want with me? I wasn't anyone special. The thought of facing a room of those imposing Time Lords was frightening. I felt a wave of homesickness. I wanted to go home.
The aforementioned Time Lords entered my room and there was silence for a moment. I imagined I must have looked somewhat ridiculous then, just a trembling puddle of frightened human being.
The mattress dipped as someone sat down behind me on the bed and a hand touched my side. “Ella?” It was the Doctor. “I know you're still not feeling well from the procedure, but we've all been ordered to a special hearing that the High Council has called. That includes you.”
I didn't turned over. “Why me? I'm not a Time Lord.”
“No, but you are Donna Temple-Noble's guardian and she was subpoened as well,” Akakios replied. “Obviously, she cannot speak for herself and you have been commanded to speak for her, as her advocate.”
That made me roll onto my back and my eyes went wide in surprise when I saw Healers Akakios and Koray. They were dressed in the strangest full length robes with long sleeves. They wore a sort of skull cap with a crazy collar that flared over their shoulders and up behind their heads, forming a half circle with half moon cutouts at the top and the shoulders. Akakios' costume was deep scarlet and gold, Koray's was heliotrope (kind of a pinkish-purple). I'd been wondering how long it would take before I really felt like I was surrounded by aliens. This was definitely it.
The Doctor caught the startled look on my face and he explained, “That's Time Lord ceremonial dress, Ella. We only wear it when summoned to Council.”
I took a deep breath, trying to calm down and feeling frustrated with myself. I really didn't have much control over my emotions. “Oh, similar to how I only wear my doctoral regalia to graduation.”
He gave me a small smile and nodded. “Something like that, yes.”
Healer Koray strode closer to me and crossed her arms, a scowl on her lined face. I couldn't tell whom she was mad at: the Council or the Doctor. I suspected it was both. “You must appear in her stead, Ella Steinfield. I objected to your presence at Council, not only because you are still recovering from yesterday, but you are unGallifreyan and the Doctor could stand as Mrs. Temple-Noble's proxy. However...” she trailed off and sniffed once, “our illustrious Madame President insisted that you appear as you are more familiar with the woman than this incarnation of the Doctor. You will accompany us to the Panopticon.”
I didn't want to go anywhere at that point, I felt so tired (despite having slept all night). Koray's comment about me being “unGallifreyan” and her implications that I didn't belong at their silly Council made me more than a little angry. Combined with my rollercoaster emotions, it's no wonder that I sat up and growled, “Stop treating me like I'm some kind of inferior being! I know the Time Lords are superior in just about every way imaginable. My god, you've mastered space and time!” I clapped my hands super slow in a sarcastic gesture. “Well, bravo for you! Have a cigar on me from the rest of the universe! The Doctor ...well, his future self at least, showed me things that changed my perspective of the world forever. I know that as race, you're amazing and clever and worth my awe. I get that, but that doesn't change that fact that I'm a sentient being, too, and pretty damn smart where I come from, thank you. I've shown you nothing but respect, Healer Koray. Don't I deserve the same in kind?! If you're not going to respect me, then I won't have you anywhere near me during this pregnancy because I will not allow someone whom I don't trust and who doesn't listen to my wishes to care for me or this child. Is that clear?”
There was a long silence. The rant had drained me and I sat there, breathing hard, as I glared at her. She raised an eyebrow and seemed unfazed. The Doctor shared a glance with Akakios and I couldn't see the expression on his face, but Akakios was smiling ever so slightly at me behind Koray's back. He seemed amused.
“I apologize if I made you feel less than welcome,” Koray's intoned her monotone drone, but I could hear the barest touch of contriteness. “I am from a time when other species were not found on Gallifrey. It takes me time to become accustomed to such changes.” She paused. “You are at a disadvantage because there are few healers experienced in managing alien pregnancies due to our prior insular planetary status. Without sounding conceited, I really am the most qualified to care for you, so you're going to have to learn to trust me.”
Koray was telling me she was old and biased and set in her kind's xenophobic ways, but at least acknowledging that was a start. I knew I was going to need her in the days to come if the baby was going to come out healthy, but I didn't know if I could trust her and that scared me. I didn't have a chance to respond, though.
“I hate to interrupt, but we need to hurry,” Akakios urged. “We're expected at Council within the hour.”
Koray grumbled at him about checking on the pregnancy's progress first and all but commanded the men to leave the room. She produced the small device that looked like a mobile from the day before from a hidden pocket in her robe. A memory of pain from when she'd used it before flashed through my mind. The Doctor reached over and squeezed my hand. Although I didn't mean to, I clutched at his fingers, not letting go. I didn't want to be left alone with her. He hesitated, glancing at Koray, who made a shooing motion at him. “It will be all right,” he murmured. “This won't take long. I have to go find some robes that fit me. My last regeneration was a bit shorter than me.”
He got up and left, shutting the door behind him. Koray pushed the covers aside without preamble and pressed her wannabe iPhone against my lower abdomen. Her actions told me that she was still irritated and I got the distinct feeling that I'd joined her little snit-fit, along with the Doctor and the Council. She wasn't exactly gentle, but I refused to flinch.
The device beeped and she glanced it, shaking her head. “Your Progesterone levels are falling. Your body refuses to produce enough hormone to maintain gestation, so we're going to have to keep convincing it that it's supposed to be pregnant until it stops resisting. The Doctor was right when he told me that human bodies could be stubborn. I don't have this issue with Gallifreyans.” She reached back into her pocket, pulled out a hypodermic, and gestured at me to roll onto my side.
She made it sound like it was my fault that my body refused to cooperate and that there was something wrong with me because I was different from her usual patients. I didn't move. I couldn't help it. I was already angry enough, but now I was simply furious, but it didn't manifest in yelling and screaming like you might expect. I'd just had a huge outburst, so instead of shouting, I resolved to the only other way of releasing pent-up emotions. I started crying. These weren't the body-wracking wails of the day before. No, these were silent tears with no sobbing, just a lot of trembling. My fingers fisted into the sheets as my face turned red. I hadn't felt that angry in years. I was actually scaring myself, I was so mad. “I can't help it and I'm sorry that my body is being problematic and I'm sorry that I can't control my emotions right now!”
Koray stood there and I could tell that she wasn't used to being disobeyed, but she also seemed uncomfortable at my tears and the livid look on my face. “There's no need to apologize. This isn't your fault. It's the hormone injections. Dr. Steinfield.” Her voice had become a little softer. “Your emotional equilibrium will stabilize once your body begins to produce them on its own,” she attempted to reassure me. The Doctor had told me the same thing the day before.
“What if it doesn't?! What if my body never gets the message? I hate feeling so out of control.”
“I understand. We'll use injections the whole time if we need to, but I might be able to devise a treatment that will boost your body's hormone production, but we'll have to worry about that later. Let's get this over with or we'll be late for Council and that is not an option.” She gestured again and by the steely look in her eyes, it was obvious that she expected me to comply.
I knew she was right, but it was still hard to just roll over and let her give me the shot. It was only the knowledge that I'd lose the baby if I refused to do so that kept me from telling her no. So, I turned over and bit my lip at the cold rush that shot through my body.
Koray stepped away and picked up a length of scarlet and gold cloth that was draped over the chair. I hadn't noticed its appearance, so one of the Time Lords must have brought it in with them. She held it up and I saw it was an elaborate gown, something that looked like it belonged on a medieval princess. “Akakios brought this for you to wear to Council.”
I sat up and wiped my tears away. “Why can't I wear regular clothes?”
“You heard the Doctor's explanation about ceremonial garb. This was made for you, in the colors of the Prydonian Chapter.”
I shook my head in confusion. “I don't understand. I'm not a Time Lord. Why do I have to wear ceremonial garb, and what's a Prydonian?”
Koray sighed. “I will explain as you dress.”
I got the message. She wasn't going to leave me alone and I was expected to hurry up. I turned my back to her to take my pajamas off, feeling self-conscious, even though she was a healer and had already seen the parts of my body normally reserved for my doctor and Brian. Healer Koray brought the gown over to me and helped me put it on. Besides my wedding gown and that stupid Renaissance dress I'd worn one Halloween in graduate school, it was the fanciest garment I'd ever worn.
As she laced up the back of the dress, she explained that Time Lord society was divided into various Chapters. The color of their robes indicated what Chapter they belonged to. The Doctor and Akakios were Prydonians and wore scarlet and gold. She was a member of the Patrexes Chapter and they wore heliotrope.
Koray further explained that since Donna Temple-Noble held the memories of the Doctor, she was by default a member of the Prydonian Chapter, like him. As I was her appointed guardian, I was also associated with the Prydonian Chapter, and so wore its colors.
Scarlet and gold, I thought as I tightened the gold satin belt around my waist. The buckle was a gold Seal of Rassilon and I felt like everything had gone surreal and I'd walked into a story. Like bloody Harry Potter, this is. Ah well, Gallifrey...Gryffindor...it's all the same color, isn't it?
Koray had only brought me the dress and not any shoes, so I pulled on my battered old trainers that I'd brought with me, grinning to myself because that was a fashion faux pas. You couldn't see my shoes, anyway, because the gown was too long.
We met up with the Doctor and Akakios in the control room. The Doctor was dressed just like Akakios in scarlet and red and he looked distinctly uncomfortable. He tugged at the stiff collar and shifted as we entered the room. “Hate these things,” he muttered as I walked up to him and he smiled. “Well, don't you look nice? Come on, then.”
“What am I supposed to say to them?” I asked as we left the TARDIS and headed out of the medical center. I wrapped my arms around myself, feeling completely lost.
“Donna Temple-Noble suffered great harm as a result of a Time Lord's mistake. We take responsibility for the actions of our kind in linear terms, but this situation is unique in that it happened in our future. You are to petition for redress on her behalf for our people to save her life,” Akakios replied.
“Is that all? But you've already done that. Why do I have to ask now?”
“Protocol must be followed.” That was Koray. “You must make a formal request in front of the High Council.”
There was silence as went outside. This was my first time outside of the building and I was surprised to see a long wooden walkway that passed through a park filled with green trees. There was strange, alien birdsong in the sky. We were heading for a cluster of imposing skyscrapers nearby. I took a deep breath and noticed the air had a distinctly metallic edge to it, like there was steel or tin in the air.
Look at me, I'm a pretty Prydonian...whatever the heck that means.
“There will be questions about how and why this happened to Donna,” the Doctor told me. “Just remember what the Tenth Doctor told you about the Laws of Time.”
“I can't reveal the future, I remember.”
“Yes, but they don't know that you know that. As a human, you're not obliged to follow those laws.”
I stopped and looked at all three of them. “Wait, so you're saying that it's ok for me to break them?”
Akakios coughed once. “I'm not saying that it's acceptable, but unlike a Time Lord, you can choose to ignore those laws. The Council will assume you're ignorant of our rules and volunteer that information freely.”
I sighed. “And I suppose they'll be upset when I invoke those laws and refuse to do so.”
Koray shook her head once. “They will not be pleased, no. However, there isn't much they will be able to do about it.”
We crossed through the park and stopped outside the imposing entrance of a building. Several guards dressed in scarlet uniforms and tight fitting helmets stood outside and straightened as we approached. The Doctor turned to me and put a hand on my shoulder, looking me in the eyes. “This will be a test of your mettle. Humans rarely face the Council and I don't blame you if you're frightened. One thing you should know is that they will know if you're lying to them and that will have serious repercussions.”
I swallowed once as I looked into his blue eyes. “What if I just withhold information? That's not lying exactly.”
He pressed his lips together. “It's possible that could work. It's worked for me, but they'll still know that you're not telling them the whole truth.”
“What can they do to me, really?” I had to know.
There was another silence. “The worst they could do would be to refuse to let you return home,” Koray intoned, “until they are satisfied that you have revealed everything about the metacrisis. That could be for an indefinite amount of time.”
So I would share Donna's fate about being confined to Gallifrey, never to see my family again. The anger I'd felt a short while earlier came roaring back and I was surprised to see the Doctor break into a pleased smile. “Hang on to that anger. You may need use it. I told you yesterday why I thought he chose you, Ella, to advocate for Donna. I think it's because he knows you have the strength and the sheer stubbornness to fight on her behalf. I wouldn't be surprised if you were a lawyer in a parallel world. I know you can do this.”
“I'm glad you think so,” I replied.
Akakios told the guards who we were and we stepped out of the bright light of Gallifrey's twin suns into the cool, metallic darkness of the Panopticon, the meeting place for the High Council of the Time Lords.