In which I am way more messed up than I even cared to admit
I am the world's biggest idiot.
I had to come Mexico City for a ELT conference this weekend and decided I would use the opportunity to revisit a certain situation. While I had had some reservations back then, I figured that I've been alone for too effing long and even I could handle a little recklessness for once. Don't ask me, it made sense in my twisted head. So, I turned down my godparents' offer to stay with them and threw caution to the winds.
While it turned out my sixth sense wasn't all that off the mark the first time around, I found out that I didn't quite mind it ... I will spare you the details, because, really, I couldn't if I tried, but I will tell you that it was quite nice to be treated like I was. I felt ... uh ... special? I don't know; I feel idiotic and sixteen trying to explain this to someone other than myself. So, anyway, I felt good about having decided to do this, and we got to talking (or rather, he started talking) about when we could see each other again, and he would like to come down to PV and visit and maybe we could travel on long weekends and what not. And I was FINE with it. Because, seriously, I've done the "serious" relationship, and I've done the marriage and the divorce and I've wondered if I'm ever going to be happy again and so what if this is a long distance thing if at least I feel good about it and can save myself all of the crap and the drama. So I allow myself to go along with it for a little bit and there's a long weekend coming at the end of April and what if we go to Monterrey. And I go to sleep a smiling idiot.
This morning we had breakfast together, and I was cold and he let me borrow a sweater and Monterrey comes up again, as well as other places neither of us have been to. After breakfast, he drove me to the conference site, and said to call him when I'm done so he can pick me up. So I call him at one, and he's a little busy at the moment but he'll call me right back. I went downtown, visited Bellas Artes, and the bookshops, and the Postal Office, and Palacio de Minería and Museo Nacional de Arte and the Museo Militar, and I walk some more and it's six o'clock already and I'm starving and I still haven't heard from him. And it's now almost nine, my plane is boarding and ...
I'm an idiot. I told you.
See you all at midnight.
E.T.A. I'm home now. And if nothing else, I have pictures for you of the things I saw. Will post when they finish uploading.
I had to come Mexico City for a ELT conference this weekend and decided I would use the opportunity to revisit a certain situation. While I had had some reservations back then, I figured that I've been alone for too effing long and even I could handle a little recklessness for once. Don't ask me, it made sense in my twisted head. So, I turned down my godparents' offer to stay with them and threw caution to the winds.
While it turned out my sixth sense wasn't all that off the mark the first time around, I found out that I didn't quite mind it ... I will spare you the details, because, really, I couldn't if I tried, but I will tell you that it was quite nice to be treated like I was. I felt ... uh ... special? I don't know; I feel idiotic and sixteen trying to explain this to someone other than myself. So, anyway, I felt good about having decided to do this, and we got to talking (or rather, he started talking) about when we could see each other again, and he would like to come down to PV and visit and maybe we could travel on long weekends and what not. And I was FINE with it. Because, seriously, I've done the "serious" relationship, and I've done the marriage and the divorce and I've wondered if I'm ever going to be happy again and so what if this is a long distance thing if at least I feel good about it and can save myself all of the crap and the drama. So I allow myself to go along with it for a little bit and there's a long weekend coming at the end of April and what if we go to Monterrey. And I go to sleep a smiling idiot.
This morning we had breakfast together, and I was cold and he let me borrow a sweater and Monterrey comes up again, as well as other places neither of us have been to. After breakfast, he drove me to the conference site, and said to call him when I'm done so he can pick me up. So I call him at one, and he's a little busy at the moment but he'll call me right back. I went downtown, visited Bellas Artes, and the bookshops, and the Postal Office, and Palacio de Minería and Museo Nacional de Arte and the Museo Militar, and I walk some more and it's six o'clock already and I'm starving and I still haven't heard from him. And it's now almost nine, my plane is boarding and ...
I'm an idiot. I told you.
See you all at midnight.
E.T.A. I'm home now. And if nothing else, I have pictures for you of the things I saw. Will post when they finish uploading.