this is the chapter of my life for which i have been yearning the arrival.
seclusion and pain.
starvation and emptiness.
and hopefully at the end of it all, beauty.

you can never be too beautiful, just like you can never be too rich.

i'm going to spend the next few months as far away from people as possible. i am going to starve myself until i lose five ( Read more... )

( drunk )

tomorrow i am going to go visit libby [heartblank ] in the hospital.

i feel loser-ish on a friday night.

my mother stole my cruisers. however, she guaranteed the replacement of them tomorrow afternoon. it just upset me because now i have nothing to drink. now i have nothing to do.

tomorrow morning i have to wake up at 5.30 to do an open for work.
after work i am going to watch a soccer game, watch another soccer game ( Read more... )

wanted:
someone to run away with.
someone that enjoys hot sex and alcohol.
someone to marry (it is imperative that the ceremony be held in las vegas).

if you fit the requirement, or would like special consideration, please email me: forward_yesterday@hotmail.com
i look forward to sifting through a complete lack of emails.

my hand is itching.
so im scratching it.
and it hurts.
and its rashing.
spreading.

im diseased!

im an infestation!

i am splotchy and red.

i like to pretend that i am different and i like to pretend that i have some form of talent. something i can do that nobody else can do better.
the harsh truth is, there is not one thing i can focus on. there is not one thing i am good at. nothing that really makes me all that special.
my one true purpose is to lead a purposeless life and then die, ( Read more... )

give me sweet oblivion.
no more pills. no more love. no more.
nothing.
dead.

give me what i want.
a complete inability to create words, thoughts&emotions.
i want to be remembered.
a perfect&blank carcass.

( drunken pictorial )

i have a digital camera, about a million new dvds and a shitload of booze.


( Read more... )