So yesterday morning I volunteered to go pick up a bad-for-us breakfast from the local Sonic, because it is yummy. The 'cuda informed us that "I want my usual", to which her father took understandable exception due to a lack of "please".

"Your usual what?"

"My usual breakfast."

"You're missing a word, there."

"...Bacon?"

"PLEASE?"

"Please."

My aunt, for whom the 'cuda is named, used to describe me as "she's a good kid, she just crabsteps to the beat of a different drummer". Best summarized by the mildly exasperated note I found in a copy of the IQ test I took when I was six: "Asked child to draw a dog. Child insisted on drawing a horse; when I agreed to the horse, she drew a mare ( Read more... )

So once they left their three-day Why Did You Put Us In A Foreign House sulk, the cats went exploring. And discovered that the lower kitchen cabinets are 1) connected from one side of the kitchen to the other and 2) open-able with a paw. This has caused them to be proclaimed Kitty Territory Forever (I had no say in this particular proclamation ( Read more... )

The next time there is a political upheaval that favors my particular perspective, I hope I handle it with the class and grace that my liberal friends on Twitter aren't.

Moved. Sitting in new house, listening to trains go by while the cats radiate Shock, Betrayal and Heartbreak through the walls at me.

It has to be through the walls, because they're nowhere to be seen.

More later.

Yes, I still exist ( Read more... )

Would anybody on my flist be willing to beta a short, spoiler-free and unabashedly fluffy post-ME3 fic? Working title "What I Did For Antidote Day, by Urdnot Mordin, Age 6". Which I think says it all re: plot and characters. :

My six-year-old daughter spent yesterday writing "Secrets of Droon" self-insert fanfiction.* On the sidewalk, with sidewalk chalk ( Read more... )

Seen on Twitter: "They were protesting, so they asked for it" is the new "she wore a short skirt, so she asked for it".

I have not seen analogy failure this total since my daughter tried to convince me that reaching page 85 of her math book was JUST LIKE level 85 in Warcraft so she shouldn't do any more today. I find it disrespectful to actual ( Read more... )

I Was flipping through one of my daughter's fairytale collections last night, seeing what was short enough to be read before bedtime and what wasn't, when I came across Hans Christian Andersen's The Red Shoes. I skimmed through it to see if it was the way I remembered it, and 30 seconds later the scissors came out. Because gaaaah. Way to teach ( Read more... )