The Behr Legacy 2.9
Want to catch up? Behr Legacy Update Collection Post
CAUTION: 60 images for a 2.8MB download.
Parental neglect, language, adult themes, sexual references, THE SUPERNATURAL. You know, the usual. ;)
HELLO PEOPLES! I open this update with a HALLOWED occasion for babies that don't matter.
ARE YOU ~DELIGHTED~?!?
This family (you have sex with a member of this family, you ARE family, kk? HEATHER! (jesstheex) *ominous*) are freakishly enthusiastic, especially for infants that don't count, amirite?!
Also, is Fin a little cross eyed? *never noticed before*
Well. Shit.
He's WAY too cute. DAMMIT. How dare you not be eligible >_<;;;
I CRY FOR YOOOOOU, BURLEY WOOOoOoOoOOD..! /Evita
Fin: You want some of your own cake, kid?
Fin: OH MY! Is he ignoring me?!?! *stress*
He's asleep because of your parental neglect. You're LUCKY if ignoring him is the worst that he does. ALIEN CONTACTS. HE GOT THEM!
Oh my! Pecan Sandie, you're impossibly pretty *fangirls*
AND NOW WE INTERUPT THIS MOMENT OF UNPARALLELED PRETTY TO BRING YOU: ~~PAAAIN~~
*questions whether or not Wanderer's true father is a Shadar-Kai*
Athena Isela: Does the child not have a headache? I've got one just from looking upon his sliced person.
Me: I think he's safe from headaches as his brain seems to have been COMPLETELY SEVERED, AI.
Athena Isela: They kept his beautiful lips in tact though. *a little relieved*
Wow they look an AWFUL lot like his aunts, no!?
*is not at all disturbed that it took having half the child's head amputated for me to notice*
Burley Wood: OH GOD I CAN'T EVEN LOOK! THIS IS NOT A C OR G RATED EXPERIENCE! I AM NOT TALL ENOUGH TO RIDE!
HARK! The sound of one horn... Echoing.
Dear Sweet Georgiabrown, you're about 7 hours too late. *huggles*
Moosewood: YAY! I VOMITED!!
Me: *alarm*
Moosewood: AND NOW I'M SITTING IN IT! *raptures*
Elfin Magic: THE BLOOD IS RUSHING TO HIS HEAD AND ~ENDANGERING HIS LIIIIFE~ THIS IS LESS THAN SENSIBLE!!!! *rejoice*
Sensible Hue: Actually, in this small dose, it means that the rush of blood to the head will stimulate brain activity and thusly strengthen my ability in the immeadiate tasks at hand.
Me: DO NOT RUIN IT, ITS NOT SENSIBLE, OKAY!?
*offers Lemon Pepper fanservice*
You KNOW you want a bite of her succulent buns. :D
Elfin Magic: Kid you gotta move, I need a bit of that bun action.
Me: Surely you're RIGHT THERE and can get some bun action of your ow---
Me: -- OH! O_O Oh crap, OUCH! >_<;;
Lemon Pepper: *~~OBLIVIOUS~~*
Geometrically-yet-fancy-haired-busdriver: Hello little girl!
Fedora: PLEASED TO MEET YOU..!
Fedora: HOPE YOU GUESSED MY NAME!
Me: *backs away slowly*
Post school hours (apparently nothing interesting happened during the day - WHICH MEAN TIME ACTUALLY PASSED THANK THE GODS! Burley Wood exposes himself as a heretofore undiscovered wit.
Or at least he does in Sweet Georgiabrown's eyes.
Wanderer: Do we ever get a look iin?
You decapitated half your head earlier and Moosewood vomited himself a chair. What more do you want kid?
Well... Okay there's been no Chocolate Cupcake, I'll grant you. *rectifies*
Chocolate Cupcake: *hurls bottle across the room* Burley Wood said that Genies were delicious. But they feel weird and bubbly in my tummy. Moosewood warned me of this.
Chocolate Cupcake: *URRRRRRK* But I remembered too late.
Chocolate Cupcake: HEHEHE! Now I'm sitting in it! *delight*
Chocolate Cupcake: *shoves finger right up nose until she can feel brains* If I get a big one, I can sit on that too!
Chocolate Cupcake: OH! I'm already sitting on this wood thing. *abandons the potentially epic forage for a mucus chair*
Would the chair have caused Chocolate Cupcake to become MONARCH OF THE MUCUS?!?!?!? We shall never know.
Athena Isela's bedroom has fast become the 'Adults' room where they vanish off to to seek a moment's peace. With THAT MANY kids in the house, I don't really blame them... ^_^;;
Since upstairs they're faced with the likes of this.
LEMON PEPPER SMASH!
I just realised I'm kind of... MEGALLY speeding through this update... ^_^;;; SORRY GUYS! I guess the rush on of I've already spent too long is getting to me. ^_^;;;
BUT LOOK! Chocolate Cupcake got a makeover, finally! :D :D
Lemon Pepper: I SAID SMASH!!!
Sorry! ^_^;;; *dwells here a moment*
Sensible Hue: So perfect, my baked creation. *smells in the goodness* This one has pecans. :DDDD
I KNOW You're thinking it. xD
Fedora: *catches a glimpse of what REALLy goes on in the stars*
Fedora: HOLY!!! Did they REALLY do that to Daddy?!
Fedora: Man, they really stick that way up in there, don't they? Uh, what are they doing with that..?
Fedora: AAAUUUUGH! THERE ARE SOME THINGS YOU CAN'T UNSEEEEE!
*interjects the scene of newly discovered horror with Chocolate Cupcake, playing make believe with Cheese*
Fedora: RUFUS?!?! Please hold me.
Fedora: Burley Wood? Rufus doesn't understand my need for brain bleach. Would you please hold me? I kneed consoling.
Burley Wood: THATS MY MOMMA YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! GTFO!
And then I spotted Elfin Magic giving Icarus a pep talk, and trying to convince him that there was much much more to life than cleaning their toilets.
I for one am VERY pleased he didn't buy this brand of what she's selling.
*misses the business* I'll never get to have The Behr Essentials at this rate. Oh well.
Fedora: Come along little brown butterflies, if you fly into this jar I'll give you honeys and nectars and you can all be named Pueblo Sand. Except for you, your name will be Steve.
Fedora: Why wont they get into the jar?
Poor Rufus, he's constantly too tired to make it to any of the choicest soft furnishings to sleep, and just gives up and sleeps where he is. Note there's an actual pet bed in this room, plus two rugs and the bed in eyeshot, not to mention the three couches near by. Poor little mite *scritches him*
YAY! Pecan Sandie finally made it all better for Fedora. I'm glad SOMEONE is understanding and able to explain cultural differences in this house.
Fedora: When I grow up, I wanna do that to a boy. *elation*
Uh, maybe she explained that a little ~~TOO~~ well...
SO! LET THIS BE A LESSON TO EVERYONE!! Don't get curious and look under the sheets when Sims are engaging in vigorous woohoo.
That way leads to madness.
Just in case you were wondering. The kids? They're still playing Carpet 360º now with 74% more shag pile.
OOOH! YOU GUYS! Its Sensible Hue's birthday!! Lets see how his sensible sensibilities deal with THEM hormones! :D
Huh. Haggard... Ly.
So he's a family sim who is massively turned on by blind geriatrics. I'm not so sure this is all that sensible...
WHY HELLO THERE HUE CRACK!
I'm loving him more already. xD
Lemon Pepper? Were you aware that you seem to have cultivated a dormant volcano on your chin? Also possibly the makings of a boreal forest on your cheek there... Just, you know, fyi?
Although apparently those kinds of forests are called taiga. She's growing it... LIKE A TAAAIIIIGA!
And after the HARDEST SLOG EVER, and deciding that with so many kids in the house no one is really getting a proper time to shine/develop their personalities. I decided ALL NON-POSSIBLE HEIRS ARE GETTING THE HECK OUT!
Au Revoire my lovely cutelings! I WILL MISS YOUUUUU *weeps at touch decision*
Aaaaugh! ;_; Parting is such sorrow... Forget the sweet. Though I guess it'll be much easier for me to play now. KK! I TAKE IT BACK! Parting IS such sweet sorrow!
Uh, Fin? You could try to not look a little TOO pleased about this...
Athena Isela: Fine with me, I'm gonna be amply glad to blow this baby ridden joint and make some cash!
Conga Line of Toddlers: *ARE COMING FOR YOOOU~~!*
Evictees: *pile into the lift with fingers crossed against possible death by elevator plummet*
Burley Wood: Uh, I'm gonna take the stairs...
Lemon Pepper: *Sits kinda like a dude*
Red Ribbed Thing In Back of Taxi: *bes ~~SINISTER~~*
WHAT THE HECK IS IT?!!? O_O;;;;;
Just as the taxi pulls away taking four of the Behrs with it, Felix, the Leader of the Pack, forebodingly graces us with his presence for the first time since the Behrs moved to Awesomesaucia.
ABOUT.
BLEEDING.
TIME.
Is this a portent of the ominous future of the family?!?! Or is he just here for a carb concious, protein rich treat? Find out next time in the Behrs, where there's THREE HUNDRED PERCENT MORE WOLFINESS!!!
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