Do you carry a Philippine Passport?
If yes, you are screwed. But breathe.. there are worse things in life..
Seriously, I used to be a proud Phil passport carrier until I started my job 10months ago. On the surface, travelling 80% of the time to US, Europe, Tokyo, North Asia, London etc etc sounds fab! In real life, it means queing in all the embassies, grovelling and requesting for a visa, and producing "additional" requirements that materialize out of nowhere. Death talaga!
Here are three vignettes of my quest to get that elusive stamp on my passport..
Swiss Embassy:
Scenario: Fourth visit to Embassy-dapat 2 lang max (attendant: Sholbong puti/panget pangalan ay S)
S: This is still unacceptable. Fax me another letter signed by HR/official P&G guy, give me original too
M: Sorry sir is there something missing in my letter? I followed requirements faithfully, Is this a new policy?
S: I know P&G! P&G will never give me a letter like this! I dont know this person signing
M: Can u pls clarify what is missing from my letter? Company letterhead,duly signed,and official letter sent to all countries for this global event
S: I know P&G! It never gives me a letter like this! I need to call P&G to confirm if this person is really P&G
Me to self: (Leche ka mamatay ka na ilang beses mo na akong pinapabalik!) but instead says,
M: Sir with all due respect its a big company may I ask which particular names you expected to see. Id like to fix it so I can make it to my flight in two days.
S: Impossible, cancel your flight. I can't give you my list it is confidential
Me to self: (Uy may nakasulat ba na bobo sa noo ko?)
M: Sir, may I ask why am requested to bring additional requirements not identified in any of your SOPs?
(for simplicity, take what Sholbo said and repeat it three times, regardless of what response i gave)
Finally, I said ok Sir, let me fix this asap, May I get your direct line so I can call you immediately to confirm you received the fax? Sholbo doesnt even have his own name card (lost!) and writes down the trunk line. He does not even have a direct line! Death!
Buti natuloy ako to see Jordi otherwise... death talaga!
On a lighter note:
French Embassy: Getting my fourth Schenzen Visa from this Zora Chineziwa
Zora: I can't accept this! Is this your address? I dont think you can get a visa
Me: (ignores other comments) Yes, that's my address
Zora: Are you sure? Is this in Hong Kong? If not I can't accept this. What is this?
Me: Yes, its the four seasons apartment in IFC mall, Central
Me: I never heard of it
Me(to self): haay...
And a more nakakaiyak note:
Swiss Embassy Getting my third swiss visa from this nice lady (wala na si sholbs! yeaah!!)
Lady: Why don't you get a multiple entry it's better!
Me: Yes ma'am Im actually applying for one
Lady: Oh, but your Sen SCHGN visa is not yet out we can only give you a single one
Me: I see ma'am, will it help if i show you all my other schgn/swiss ones are multiple?
Lady: Next time try to apply earlier like a month in advance so you get your SCHGN visa first
Me: I see. Didnt realize they were linked? My trips are on separate occasions and am flying to GVA only
Lady: Well they are not really linked but I want to see your SCHGN one first just to be sure...
Me: Is that part of the policy?
Lady: Well they are not really linked but I want to see your SCHGN one first just to be sure...
Me: I see, is there any other option to get a multiple one as I really travel frequently to this place?
At this point, take her first three sentences and repeat all over again four times. After what seemed like an hour I said, its ok Ill take a single-entry please.
HAAAY!!!
With each unhappy visit to the embassy, my officemate vivian always reminds me of her smart tip, when I just came in.. Pakasalan mo na kasi si brendan!
HAAAAY!!