My Life As A Butterfly - PART THREE
Title: My Life As A Butterfly
Author/Artist: digthewriter
Word Count: 22,300
Pairing: Harry/Draco; Ron/Hermione, Theo/Blaise, Seamus/Pansy, Percy/Oliver, Ginny/Dean, Sirius/Remus
Rating: NC-17
Summary: At the age of seventeen, Harry finds himself falling in love with a detached Draco Malfoy. Through a series of unfortunate miscommunications and gossip, he had a bad falling out (of love), too. Now, years later, can Harry make amends about a misunderstanding? Would Draco forgive him?
READ PART ONE
READ PART TWO
17th December, 2003"Draco..."
The glass shatters on the ground first. Clearly, Harry startled him. Then, Draco hangs his head low. Harry has no idea if he is going to get a hex, a scolding for invading someone's privacy, or be just flat out ignored.
Eventually, he turns around, and his sharp gaze nearly cuts Harry through and through.
Harry opens his mouth slightly to say something. He could apologise for disturbing Draco. He could pretend he got lost. No, he is just going to stand there; he is going to stand his ground. He has nothing to apologise for. It's been six years, and there is no going back.
"Potter," Draco says, his face as impassive as it could ever be. "Enjoying yourself?"
Harry shrugs. "As much as a single person can at an event celebrating love," he says. "At least there's free alcohol."
Draco chuckles. He fucking chuckles! "Indeed," he says a moment later, and straightens up. It's as if he'd forgotten who he's talking to.
"Do you need help with that?" Harry points at the shattered glass at Draco's feet.
"No need," Draco replies, and he removes his wand from his pocket. With a nonverbal spell, the glass materialises into its old form, and it floats in the air until it settles on the table next to the Firewhisky bottle.
"Drinking alone?"
"Just needed a moment," Draco says; he taps the glass on the table, and so it turns into two. Clearly, Draco has a few tricks up his sleeve. He always did. "I'm not used to so many people at my house. Not since I was a child and my parents hosted these lavish parties. I thought I could handle it-play host for Pansy's sake. Not as easy as it seems."
He pours two small shots in both glasses and offers one to Harry.
Harry finally steps all the way onto the veranda, and he can feel the heating charm that's there.
"Cheers," Draco says and he taps his glass with Harry's.
"What should we drink to?"
Draco shrugs. "You can decide."
"Making amends?" Harry says in a hopeful tone. "Maybe...second chances?"
Draco gives him a curt nod and downs the drink in one go. Harry does the same. It's bitter, but it goes down smooth. This isn't the stuff they're serving at the party. Harry can tell this is the vintage stuff, the kind of drinks Lucius Malfoy would keep in the basement of the house. The kind Sirius and Remus hold onto for special occasions.
"It's good," Harry says.
"Do you know much about Firewhisky?" Draco asks, sounding slightly curious.
"I know what tastes good," Harry says, chuckling. He realises what's he's just tasted is the same taste that's in Draco's mouth. If he were to kiss Draco right now, would he taste similar?
"Hmm." Draco turns around to look at the snow in the garden again. The empty glass, still in his hand.
Harry steps in further and grabs the bottle. He tops himself off and offers to pour some in Draco's glass. Draco accepts.
Now they’re standing next to each other, and this is the closest Harry has been to Draco since they left Hogwarts. It's the scent that does him in again. That fucking smell. What is it? Is it his cologne? Has he been using the same thing forever or is it just something that's just Draco?
"You smell the same." Wait, did Harry just say that out loud? He must be more inebriated than he realised. He was fine drinking wine up until he'd entered the veranda. Two shots of Firewhisky. When did Harry become such a lightweight?
"Pardon me?" Draco's curious tone remains, and he turns to look at Harry, one eyebrow raised.
"That's how I always knew you were around," Harry says. In for the sickle, in for the knut.
"Around where?"
"Hogwarts," Harry says. One word. "I knew you were around because of your scent." This is the only chance Harry has. He'd tried to write to Draco in the past, and Draco never opened his letters. There was always some force of nature that was betting against them and winning. He needs this night to tell Draco everything. If he'll keep him here for the rest of it, just so he can come clean, he will.
Draco frowns. It's that look Harry hasn't seen since their time in the library. When Draco read Harry's essays and gave a look of, What the fuck are you on, Potter?
"I've read your book, Draco," Harry says. Realisation slightly dawns on Draco's face, but there's so much more to this. "Even if I hadn't, I'd have known," he adds.
Harry knows more about Draco than Draco realises. He knows more about Draco than he gives himself credit for. He knows Draco was doing really well at the DMLE as a Junior Auror and he was making a name for himself. When he'd opted to work in the office as a trainer instead of becoming an Auror supervisor, rumours about his sexuality were starting to discredit him from his work.
Being gay in the wizarding world isn't a big deal, but discrimination can be found everywhere. Draco was starting to face it in his workplace. And Harry was aware of a lot of Draco's struggles. Between what was being published in the Prophet, Ron, Hermione, Percy's rants, and Nott's conversations with Harry, Harry was always kept updated.
Eventually, Draco had contracted with a publishing company and wrote a textbook he'd offered to McGonagall and Dumbledore to add into the course curriculum for Transfiguration.
My life as a butterfly.
The book, written more as a memoir than anything else, examines various forms of Transfigurations one could have, and the easy spells that surrounded them. It is an in-depth research of pushing the limits of the rules of Gamp's Law of Self Transfiguration. It also discusses Draco coming to terms with his own homosexuality at the age of twelve and deciding nothing was going to keep him away from reaching for his dreams.
Each chapter reviews the benefits of Transfiguring into various creatures, along with several pages that focus on the black and green bug that blends into the background. The butterfly reference was more towards his sexuality than his Animagus, which Draco claimed he could never really settle on.
Draco doesn't necessarily look surprised. It was the number one bestseller for six months, even if it was featured as a textbook, one that eventually led him into the role as an Undercover Investigation trainer.
"All that time I spent with you in the library," Harry says with a soft smile. "Turns out, I like reading."
"The scent lingers," Draco says in deep thought. Leave it to him to turn Harry's attempt at a confession into a scholastic matter.
"Yeah. It does." Harry turns to look at him wondering what he's going to do now? They're face to face after so long. What's the next step? Is Draco going to slap him? Tell him to fuck off? Or send Snape to fight his battles again.
Okay, maybe Harry's still a bit bitter about that.
He fetches into his pocket and brings out the tulip he'd nicked from the dining hall. He offers it to Draco. The bug, it was his favourite thing to nibble on.
Draco looks down at the flower for a long while, but he doesn't take it. "What do you want, Potter?"
What does Harry want? All those years spent practicing what he was going to say to Draco, and now he feels hesitant. He has to make it worth it.
"Why do you order my brooms?" Okay, maybe it’s not the best thing to say, but jumping in before thinking has always been kind of Harry's thing.
"Because they are the best in the country." Draco's response is so matter-of-fact that Harry wants to argue, but it's also a compliment so Harry knows he shouldn't argue.
Harry opens his mouth again, unsure of what he's about to say, when Millicent taps on the door that leads into the veranda.
"Draco, it's time."
Harry turns to look at Millicent, who gives him a quick smile and then looks at Draco expectantly. Harry watches Draco as he searches for something in his pocket, and he freezes the moment he's taken it out. Of course he hadn't thought about the fact that Harry is standing right there. He quickly glances at his pocket watch and then closes it up before placing it back to where it came from. "Be there in a moment, Millie."
The pocket watch. Harry's pocket watch, the one he'd given to Draco for Christmas when they were seventeen.
I was in love with you. Harry wants to say. Instead, he blurts out, "You look hot." He puts the tulip on the lapel of his robe.
Draco gives him a look of utter confusion and annoyance. His brows furrow and his eyes slightly narrow. They're the same height, yet Harry can't help but think of how tall Draco is all of a sudden.
"Just wanted to say that. In case no one else has."
"I'm needed," Draco says, pointing at the exit door and a moment later, has disappeared into it.
"Yes. You are," Harry mumbles to himself and makes his way back to the ballroom.
*Soon, Harry finds out, it's time for cake. The happy couple makes a show of cutting the cake while champagne is served, then everybody toasts. They look ecstatic to have their best friends standing by their side for this joyful occasion. Dean and Draco take pictures with Seamus and Pansy while they are being fussed over by the professional photographer.
The rest of the evening is a blur. The guests leave one by one and Harry tries to linger on for as long as he can. Luna has had too much champagne, so Neville offers to take her home. If it were anyone else, Harry would have been worried, but he knows she'll be safe with Neville.
"You coming, mate?" Ron asks Harry just as he and Hermione are about to step into the Floo.
"I'll be heading home in a few. I'll catch up with you later," Harry says and they nod, hesitating a bit, but leave anyway.
Seamus and Pansy are sitting on an armchair in the corner, snogging, while Draco stands by the Floo, one hand behind his back and the other holding a champagne glass as he bids the guests goodbye. Harry approaches him cautiously.
A curt nod, then, "Potter."
"Draco..."
"Thank you for attending."
"Can we-"
He starts to walk away. "I have to deal with some last minute details, if you don't mind-"
"I mind."
"What?"
"What if I told you, I mind?"
"Potter, this isn't the place."
"When is the place? Or the time?" Harry is calm, despite the nervousness he feels in his heart, despite the anger he feels in the pit of his stomach.
"I don't-"
Harry takes a deep breath. "I don't want to talk about this tonight," he says, to which Draco's eyes widen. "I just want to have dinner with you. You name the place and time. I just want to talk. Then."
"Very well. I'm free on Saturday evening."
Harry raises an eyebrow. This is almost too easy.
Draco rolls his eyes. "I will not reschedule, I promise."
"Are you sure...?"
"Potter."
"Brilliant." Harry resists the attempt to not push his luck any further, he Disapparates from the Malfoy Manor, only to crash on his bed at home. Draco's agreed to go to dinner with him on Saturday. He can only hope he has the patience to last until then.
Before undressing, Harry takes the tulip off his robe and places it under a stasis charm so it's still fresh in the morning when he wakes up.
*The next day when Harry arrives at Lightning Spotters, he has an idea. He brings out the latest broom he's working on and wraps it to mail it off. He summons his owl and sends the broom to the Ministry, to the DMLE. Specifically, to Draco Malfoy.
I'm sending you my latest ideas for a new broom, along with the specifics. Please let me know what you think of them. Perhaps we can discuss them over coffee this evening?
The response comes almost immediately.
Potter, the new broom looks good. I do have some ideas for improvement, but we are already meeting on Saturday, let's discuss it then.
Harry smiles at the parchment and writes a swift reply. Draco, I'd rather not discuss business on the evening of our date. But, if you don't want to meet this evening, that's not a problem. I'm just glad to know you still remember our arrangement.
Harry returns to work, and tending to his customers as the day goes on. He doesn't have to wait long until another reply arrives.
You all but refused to leave my home last evening unless I agreed to go out with you. Trust me, I'm far too familiar with your tactics. I'm well aware, if I'd not agreed to meeting you on Saturday, you would only badger me until I'd said yes. And I didn't say it was a date.
Harry scowls at the letter. It's a date.
During lunch, when his assistant comes into the shop for her shift, Harry goes to the flower shop two doors over, and buys a bouquet of tulips. He sends them to Draco with a note that says: It's a date.
Another response comes, but it's not from Draco, but Percy.
Harry, the Minister wants to know if you're going to be dating a DMLE employee, can we get your brooms on a discount?
Harry throws his head back and laughs as hard as he can. He can only write one thing, No, Weatherby. I'll only charge double.
On the next day, Harry sends another bouquet of tulips to Draco, reminding them of their date, and a Say Hi to Percy for me.
*Harry arrives at the gates of the Malfoy Manor where a house-elf greets him. They walk into the main hall, and the room looks exceptionally different from a few days ago when Seamus and Pansy's party was here.
Draco walks into the room wearing a Muggle suit, and Harry's glad he too had opted for wearing formal Muggle wear. Not necessarily a suit like Draco's, but a silk dress shirt with black trousers, and a lightweight black jumper. He doesn’t look nearly as good as Draco.
His hair looks the same from the other night, and Harry didn't think it could have got more sexier. But it has. His lips are wet as if he'd just placed some sort of balm on them, probably because of the cold weather, and Harry has to remind himself he should not stare at Draco's lips the entire night.
He could, but he shouldn't.
"Ready?" Harry asks, struggling to sound casual. He reaches in his back pocket and pulls out a red tulip to hand to Draco.
Draco scowls, but Harry can tell he isn't that upset. "Your little gesture has really made a mockery out of me at the office," he says, before he takes the flower and places it in the inside pocket of his suit jacket.
"Why? Did Percy get jealous he isn't the only one that gets flowers delivered to him at the Ministry?" Harry says before he takes Draco's arm.
Draco smiles at Harry's comment but doesn't respond to it.
If Harry had thought Draco was tight lipped when they were together at Hogwarts, it doesn't even compare to how quiet he is now. At least before, he had been able to decipher what Draco's expressions, silence, and smiles meant. But now, it's like he has to start from scratch again.
"Where are we going?" Draco asks, looking down at Harry's hold on his arm.
"To a Muggle restaurant," Harry replies. "Is that okay?"
Draco nods with his usual impassiveness.
"I'll have to Apparate us there, to an Apparition point near the restaurant, and then walk from there. Is that okay?"
"Certainly."
"Brilliant." It's all Harry can say since he's at a loss for words with Draco being so close to him. His scent is intoxicating and Harry wonders if there really is something about being Animagi or a morphing expert that makes the scent stronger. He could always tell Sirius had entered the room before he'd even look up.
He has to concentrate extra hard because of Draco being there with him. He doesn't want to accidentally splinch himself or worse, Draco, and when they arrive at the alley just around the corner from the Muggle restaurant, Harry releases a sigh of relief.
"Been a while?" Draco asks, and Harry can't help but wonder if there's a tone of concern hidden in his voice.
"Just when doing it with another person," Harry says with a smile.
"Don't Apparate much with other people, do you?"
"No," Harry says, shaking his head. He places a warming charm on himself and Draco before they begin to walk towards the restaurant. "It's been awhile since I've Apparated with someone."
Draco nods, looking down on to the ground. Their arms brush slightly, but Harry doesn't pull away. Neither does Draco.
"What about you?" Harry asks.
"Are we talking about Apparating, Potter?"
"You know we're not, Draco."
Draco looks like he's going to tell Harry it's none of his business, or just to shut up, or maybe he'll just walk away; but he releases a resigned sigh, instead. "It's been at least a year since I've Apparated..." He looks confused for a moment, "...with someone."
"Hmm. So you do date."
"It's been known to happen."
"So all that stuff about Pureblood expectations and finding the right partner to marry-"
"Those are all true," Draco says with a defensive tone. "Just because I wasn't a tart at Hogwarts..."
"Right," Harry says and he turns to point at the entrance of the restaurant. "We're here."
They enter Chez Henri and the hostess takes their coats promptly, before she seats them at a corner table. The restaurant isn't very full as it is the holidays and most people spend time with their families during this time of the year, and that's precisely why Harry picked this restaurant. He wanted to be out somewhere with Draco, but not in a place that was too crowded.
"Shall I suggest a bottle of wine to start?" the waiter says a moment after he approaches their table and hands them a menu.
Harry eyes Draco, who looks uncomfortable. He turns to the waiter and speaks before Draco can say anything. "I'm not drinking tonight. I'll have a café au lait, if you wouldn't mind." He looks at Draco who nods in the affirmative. "Make that two, please."
"Very well, Messieurs. I'll be right back."
"Still not much of a drinker, then?" Harry asks casually as he peruses the appetizer list. He saw Draco with that bottle of Firewhisky the night of the party, maybe he just likes the hard stuff.
"Not with dinner, not usually. I'm afraid I had a bit too much to drink late into the evening on Wednesday, and I'd rather not make it a habit."
"The Firewhisky. That can be an expensive habit."
"Undoubtedly. Especially if you let Pansy near that stuff."
"So if you're not getting drunk alone on the veranda at a party, when do you usually drink?"
Draco shrugged. "I tend to have a glass of wine when I settle in with a good book."
Harry nodded. "Yeah. Me too. Except, I don't know anything about wines. I just grab whatever Remus has in the cellar."
"Professor Lupin?" Draco asks, with an eyebrow raised.
"Yeah, he and Sirius have been together for I don't know something like twenty years. I still stay at home with Sirius, since Remus is usually gone for most of the school year, and I've got my own private flat in the attic."
Draco looks thoughtful. "Must be nice to be near family."
"Where are your parents?" Harry focuses on showing concern in his voice. He wants Draco to know that he really does care.
"In France, mostly. Father doesn't approve of me working for the DMLE. He thinks I should have joined the family business. I have other opinions about that..."
"Yeah, I think Sirius was disappointed I didn't want to work in the shop with him, but I think he's happy with me being next door." They are quiet for a while, and Harry struggles to find things to say. He has stuff to say, he just isn't sure if that kind of stuff should be said right now.
"You should come by and say hello to Sirius."
Draco looks up at him, seemingly slightly confused.
"I mean, you're cousins, right? I know there's some family falling out - I don't really know all the details, but yeah - I'm sure Sirius would love to see you."
"Right," Draco says, hesitantly.
"I didn't mean tonight. I meant-just some time. They're not even in the country. You know, because you're not coming over to my place tonight...I mean, unless you want to. Or not. I'm not trying to-"
"Ready to order?" The waiter steps in at precisely the right time, and Harry is relieved beyond all reason. He'd not been this nervous on a date with anyone since-well since Draco. And here they are.
It's too quiet at the table again. The appetizer has come and gone and the main course is being served. Harry orders a lamb dish while Draco opts for the vegetarian quinoa and squash dish.
"I was in love with you, you know," Harry says, finally, when the silence has been lingering for too long, and he knows if he doesn't just say it now-if he would never say it.
Draco drops his fork into his dish and looks up at Harry, visibly annoyed.
"Just thought you should know. The thing with Alan-what you heard-it wasn't true."
Draco opens his mouth to say something when they are interrupted by someone. Someone Harry hadn't expected.
"Harry?" He hears, recognising the French accent in an instant. Jérôme’s soft voice brings memories to Harry’s mind.
He hadn't thought about Jérôme, not really, ever since they'd broken up over nine months ago, and he really hadn't thought Jérôme would still be in London.
Harry stands up off his chair in haste and nearly tips his water glass over. "Jérôme!" Harry also dropped his serviette on the floor and he bends down to pick it up hurriedly. "What-what are you doing here?" When Jérôme raises an eyebrow at him, he adds, "I thought you'd be with your family for Christmas."
"I had some work to finish up," Jérôme says, drawling. "I leave tomorrow via..." He looks around at the Muggles that surround them. "Well, you know how."
"Right," Harry says; he can still feel his face flushing. Jérôme turns to look at Draco and Harry's gaze follows Jérôme's to find Draco looking at the both of them with intense interest.
Harry shakes his head and relaxes slightly. "Jérôme, this is my friend, Draco Malfoy. Draco, this is Jérôme."
"Jérôme Barnet," Draco says; Harry can tell it isn’t a question. He gracefully stands up from his seat and offers his hand to Jérôme. "I'm a fan of your work."
"Oh," Jérôme says; now his face slightly flushing. "I didn't realise- Of course, you're not Muggle." His gaze went up and down Draco, taking in Draco's clothing, and maybe more. Harry watches them interact with faint discomfort.
Draco chuckles. "Hardly. Harry and I are friends from school."
"Ah, how could I forget," Jérôme says, as if he's just had a sudden realisation about something. "You wrote all those Transfiguration books and that memoir of yours Harry loves so much." He rolls his eyes when he looks at Harry, clearly seeing Harry's embarrassment.
"Oh, come on, Harry. It's hardly a secret. In the middle of the night, I'd wake up and see Harry with one of your books in his lap and a glass of wine in hand. I should have known then," Jérôme says.
"Known what?" Draco asks; his face is either intrigue or annoyance, Harry can't tell.
"The one that got away," Jérôme says casually. He turns to look at someone a few tables over. "Well, I must be off. Sorry to disturb your dinner. Have a nice Christmas, gentlemen." He tips his head slightly and then walks off, leaving Harry and Draco standing by their table, staring at each other.
They take their seats once again, and Harry wishes he had something stronger to drink than just water. He motions over to the waiter and asks for two Scotch whiskies.
"So, an ex-boyfriend, I take it," Draco says with a hint of amusement Harry didn't know he'd missed until he took a note of it this time. He gave Harry a smirk, as if he were thinking of a million different jokes about Harry having dated a Wizard Fashion Stylist, not to mention makeup artist for the Weird Sisters.
Harry shrugged. "I like 'em pretty," he said in a joking tone and gives a nervous chuckle.
"I'm sure," Draco says casually. "Apparate much, did you?"
Harry coughs with surprise. "For eight months, until-"
The waiter stopped by their table to drop off the whiskies.
"Until?" Draco asks.
"Until March. Right around Ron's birthday."
"That's not what you were going to say."
"We were planning on going to Nice for a Spring festival with his family. It was all fine until I overheard him discussing wedding plans, and I..." Harry shrugged. "I was never one to settle down so quickly."
"Right," Draco says, thoughtfully. He sips on his whiskey as Harry finishes his in one gulp.
"I suppose I'm still looking for someone who can give me the freedom to be."
Draco scrutinises him with his sharp gaze. His grey eyes seem to be pinning Harry in the chair. "That's a title of one of my chapters."
"I know," Harry says with a smile. He is too nervous for this, but tries not to show it. He'd wanted to impress Draco, show him he'd changed. To tell him he used to love him, and then Jérôme showed up out of nowhere, and Draco didn’t really bat an eyelash about it.
"Do you want to get dessert or another cup of coffee?" Harry asks after their table has been cleared away.
"No. I'm fine, thank you," Draco replies and Harry summons for the bill. When Harry is getting ready to pay, Draco stops him for a moment. "Are you sure? I have Muggle-"
"It's all right, Draco. I asked you to dinner, remember?"
Draco nods and Harry almost says Draco can pay next time, but he doesn't want to push his luck.
After grabbing their coats from the hostess, they walk in silence. Harry purposely leads Draco away from the Apparition point. He's not sure if Draco knows or has just chosen to not say anything. They're walking more into the centre of the city and it's freezing. He didn't get a chance to cast a warming spell on them, but Draco isn't complaining. In fact, Draco isn't saying anything at all.
"About what I said earlier..." Harry says quietly. "Before Jérôme stopped by the table."
Draco stops and turns to look at Harry. It's as if he's expecting an apology or an excuse; maybe he's waiting for Harry to take it back. Harry has no idea what Draco thinks of him. Does he still hate him?
Draco's hand is in his right pocket and he's fidgeting with something. He reaches down to take Draco's hand in his. Draco easily releases whatever he's holding onto in his pocket and his fingers entwine with Harry's. It's almost as if the six years haven't passed and they are back to where they'd started from.
"Alan was a wanker," Harry whispers, looking into Draco's eyes.
"I don't really want to talk about Alan right now," Draco says.
Harry gives him a huge smile and Draco's eyes flash over to Harry's lips before he catches Harry's gaze again. Harry can't help himself and does the same, licking his lips at the same time. Shite. What he wouldn't give to taste those lips right now.
Every kiss Harry's ever had since Hogwarts, he'd wondered if they'd taste as good as Draco.
"You still have the pocket watch," Harry says. He suspects the thing in Draco’s pocket is the watch itself.
"Yes. It's proved to be useful," Draco says, before biting his lower lip.
Something has clearly changed between them. Harry now knows that Draco doesn't hate him. But all this back and forth is driving him mad.
If Harry's honest with himself, he's getting frustrated. Honestly, this has gone on for far too long. "You never gave me my Christmas present," he says. "I mean, it's only fair since you still use mine."
Draco steps closer and Harry's arms instinctively wrap around Draco's waist. "This doesn't mean I forgive you," Draco says.
"This doesn't mean I forgive you," Harry says.
Draco nods curtly. "Fair enough."
Harry caresses Draco's cheek with the back of his hand and Draco leans into the touch. His lower lip is trembling, and Harry wonders if it's from need or from the cold. Maybe just a little bit of both.
"Drac-"
Draco's lips are on Harry's before he can even finish saying his name. His first impression is of the chilliness of Draco's lips, with the warmth of his mouth. He tastes like the whiskey they'd had with a hint of squash and coffee. Harry takes in a deep breath and sucks on Draco's lower lip with desperation. Draco's hands tighten around Harry's waist, and Harry never ever wants him to let go.
The kiss is everything. Everything Harry's ever wanted. Until Draco slightly probes Harry's mouth with his tongue and Harry parts his lips to give Draco the permission to enter. Now, it's everything he never knew he needed.
Harry doesn't know when his hands found themselves inside Draco's coat, but he's got a tight hold on Draco - pulling him closer - pressing their hips together. Draco moans in his mouth, and if that isn't the sexiest thing Harry’s ever heard.
It's nearly Christmas. It's Christmas six years later, and he finally has what he'd always wanted. He finally has Draco back in his arms.
A group of girls walk by them and they giggle, finally making Harry realise where he is. They break apart panting, only their lips though, as Harry's arms are still tight around Draco.
"Do you want to Apparate with me?" It's the only thing that comes to Harry's mind, and he curses himself for being ridiculous.
"I-"
"Not tonight. Maybe some other evening, you can come over to my flat and maybe I can make you dinner..." Harry gives him a soft smile. He hopes he hasn't offended Draco or crossed the line.
Harry tries to look at Draco, watching for his reaction, and trying to imagine what he's thinking. But he can’t help himself and his gaze constantly flickers to Draco’s lips. He leans down and kisses Draco again, pulling him tighter this time. He pushes his tongue into Draco's mouth and allows Draco to suck on it. He needs Draco to show Harry how much Draco wants it too.
Draco doesn't seem to mind. He's willingly kissing Harry back-sucking and moaning while his fingers pull on Harry's coat.
"Right..." Harry says as they break for breath again. "I was saying..."
"Yeah, you were," Draco says before he's kissing Harry again. Harry has no idea when they'd started to move, but he's now pressed against a wall and Draco is settled between his legs. He's biting Harry's lower lip and Harry's glasses are so fogged up, he can't see anything. He lets go of his hold on Draco just to remove his glasses and they fall on the ground. Harry doesn't give a damn. He doesn't give a damn about anything but Draco Malfoy. Kissing Draco Malfoy. Having Draco Malfoy kiss him back.
This time, when they break apart, Harry rests his forehead against Draco's. He marvels at the fact that it took him so long to share a kiss with Draco, and it now seems like the stupidest thing in the world. The fact that he didn't do it years and years ago makes him feel like it's the only regret in his life.
How many men did Draco kiss in all those years? How many men did Harry waste time kissing, when he could have been kissing Draco instead?
Draco's eyes are closed, but Harry's eyes rest on Draco's lips again. They're red, full, and slightly bruised, and Harry mentally kicks himself for being turned on by that. Still, he wants to do more damage. He wants to make Draco, beg, and moan, and whimper and all sorts of things two people do when they're so passionate about each other.
These few minutes with Draco are so much more in comparison to the eight months he'd spent with Jérôme or any other man for that matter.
It couldn't be right, could it? Is this just the heat of the moment talking or is Harry still - in love with Draco?
Harry's hands around Draco's waist become bolder as he gently starts to massage him under his coat. He drops a few small kisses on Draco's chin and jaw, before settling on Draco's lips again.
Draco presses his body against Harry's. Now when they grind their hips together, Harry can feel how hard they both are. How desperate Harry is for Draco and well, if his erection is anything to go by, how Draco wants him just as badly.
"If I'd known you kiss like this," Harry says softly. He doesn't want to break the moment between them.
"I never would have passed any of my classes," Draco says.
Harry laughs against Draco's lips before he gently kisses him again. "So you're saying you kept me waiting, because..."
"I was afraid the physical relationship would hinder me from my goals," Draco says, kissing Harry back; small kisses in between his words.
"You did have a lot of expectations laid upon your shoulders," Harry says, thoughtfully.
"Watching you..." Draco pauses for a moment, "in your room. That was-that had to suffice for some time." It comes out like a confession and Harry can tell that Draco means it that way.
"I knew you were there," Harry says, almost triumphantly. "In the beginning, at least."
"You used to say my name."
"I still do."
Draco's eyes widen at the implication of Harry's statement. "Potter-"
"Harry," Harry says as he brushes his thumb over Draco's lower lip.
"Fuck me."
"What?" Harry's hand stills on Draco's jaw and his eyes are on Draco's again.
"I was in love with you too," Draco says, gasping for breath as he ruts against Harry with his hands in Harry's hair, tugging on his locks, and he pulls Harry in for a deep kiss again. "I've been a fool. Focusing on school, and then my career, thinking I could forget about you. I don't want to wait another six years for-"
"Okay," Harry says and he wants to stop. He wants to stop, and take a step back before he's ready to take Draco home; but they're standing in a dark corner of the street and it's so cold out that there aren't any Muggles around. It's like they're the same horny teenagers, but now, Harry's allowed to touch Draco in places he couldn't before. He's allowed to show Draco how much he wants him. His hand travels down to cup Draco's balls before he rubs Draco's erection with his palm, and then unzips Draco's trousers.
Draco's eyes are closed; he looks like he's doing his best to keep his composure - and failing miserably. His cock is hot in Harry's hand and, fuck, it's nice and firm. Harry starts to stroke it gently at first, but it isn't long until he's really tugging on it. Draco bites his lip and he thrusts his hips slightly, fucking Harry's hand. Harry is sure this isn't what Draco meant, but he's right-they've waited six years.
After this, Harry is going to take Draco home. And they'll do it nice and proper in Harry's bed or maybe in the shower. But, he knows this isn't the end, it's just the beginning.
Harry sees the hesitation on Draco's face. He leans in and kisses Draco again. All he wants to do is kiss Draco all the time. "Do it," he whispers against Draco's lips. "Come for me, Draco."
Draco opens his mouth and releases a small groan before he lets go, and he's spilling in Harry's hand, still pumping in and out until he's good and done for-until the last drop.
"Bugger," Draco says looking down at Harry's clothes. He's made quite a mess, but Harry doesn't mind; doesn't care, because Draco is there and they are together.
Harry reaches into his coat and pulls out his wand to spell himself clean as Draco quickly tucks his prick inside his trousers.
Draco starts to say something, "I don't know what-"
"It's okay. I wanted this."
"You wanted this?" Draco says, half laughing.
"Okay, maybe not exactly this...in a dark street corner, but you know, this." He motions between the two of them before he pulls Draco closer. "Come home with me tonight."
"If you insist," Draco says with a straight face, but Harry can see the desire in Draco's eyes. There's no doubt about it, Draco wants to go home with him.
"I insist," Harry says. He shifts sideways to pick up his glasses off the ground. Thankfully, they aren't broken. When he looks at Draco again, he smiles, "Just hold onto me." A moment later, he Apparates them into his flat.
*His flat isn't anything monumental. Since he shares the house with Sirius and Remus, Harry spends most of his time downstairs. But his place has the privacy he needs: a small kitchen, a sitting room for when his friends visit, and a private bath. It also has its own Floo network and a private entrance.
"It's not much," he says to Draco.
Draco shrugs as he looks around. "It has a bed."
Harry grins at the comment. "That it does." He takes one step closer to Draco, removing the distance between them since they'd Apparated into the flat. "Draco-"
"Potter, I want to-"
"Harry."
"Harry." Draco rolls his eyes, but his hold on Harry remains tight. "I want to apologise for the way I treated you." Harry's slightly confused by the statement, but he doesn't say anything. He lets Draco talk. "When we were at Hogwarts...I was in love with you and kept you at an arm's length, because I was afraid you'd break my heart. Instead, I acted like an arsehole. I was irrational. I practically stalked you and then I pulled away. I don't deserve-"
Harry kisses Draco before he has a chance to finish. He's heard enough.
"Maybe we're both at fault," Harry says, "but it was a very long time ago. I just-I haven't been able to forget about you, and I don't want to dwell in the past. I just want this. Now."
Draco gives him half a smile. Harry kisses him again, and this time, deepens the kiss. Gods, he's really loving kissing Draco so much and can't imagine how he survived for so long without it.
He starts pushing Draco so he can start walking backwards, and they kiss and walk until the back of Draco's legs hit Harry's bed and then Harry's on top of him. They remove their coats in haste, then gently, he's pressing down at Draco's body and is amazed at how much Draco is allowing him to do everything.
Eventually, Harry pulls back and looks down at Draco. "You said it's been a while, but you have-"
Draco nods, looking slightly embarrassed. "Initially, I wanted you to be my first but-"
"But we broke up and you moved on."
Draco nods again, looking guilty. He looks away from Harry, seemingly not wanting Harry to judge his decision harshly.
"Sorry I never kissed you."
Then his gaze is back on Harry and Draco smiles, bites his lower lip, and props his head up to lay a quick kiss on Harry's lips. "You're making up for it now," he says and Harry smiles.
"How did you want me?" Draco asks after they've been kissing for a while. They're still fully dressed, except for the winter coats, and Harry hasn't had the time or the desire to do anything else at the moment. Sure, he wants Draco. He wants to be deep inside him, show him how much he loves him. How good he can make it for Draco, but just having this is enough for now.
"What?" Harry asks, confused.
"When you thought of me, while you were in your bed… you called my name. So how did you want me?"
"I wanted...I wanted..." Harry is panting as Draco is sucking on a spot on his neck. His hands are unbuttoning Harry's shirt. "On your knees, open you up with my tongue..."
Draco arches up as Harry presses down, grinding their groins together. Harry removes his sweater and throws it on the floor, and Draco's hands keep moving all over Harry's body, untucking the shirt, unbuckling the belt. They writhe against each other, unable to stop.
It's a struggle to get their clothes off completely. There are hands everywhere, mouths wanting to touch, lick, kiss, taste everything.
Finally, Harry's settled between Draco's legs. Their erections are rubbing together. Harry's been hard since the first moment his lips were pressed against Draco's, and now finally Draco is touching him. He's afraid he's going to come right then and there, just from Draco's rough strokes. It feels amazing and he knows he needs to pace himself.
He's about to say something to Draco when Draco's other hand rakes through Harry's hair. "I want you to do that."
"Do what?" Harry asks, softly.
Draco bites his lower lip as if he’s become shy all of a sudden. Harry smiles down at him, understanding what it is that Draco wants him to do, then removes his glasses to place them on the bedside table. He pulls back away and gives Draco's body a long hard look before his eyes are land on Draco's face again. "Turn around."
Draco sits up and follows Harry's request. He's on his knees, his face buried in the pillows as Harry reaches down and kisses the back of Draco's neck. Draco shivers slightly as if he hadn't been expecting that. What had he been expecting? Harry wonders. He starts to leave a trail of kisses all the way down Draco’s spine, until he reaches Draco's arse, and squeezes it. He licks at Draco's hole tentatively that results in a small whimper from Draco.
Harry does it again, and again, until he's really plunging in and out with vigour. Draco's moans only get louder. His cries of pleasure are ready to send Harry over the edge. God, like this, he won't survive inside Draco for even a minute. But it'll be worth it.
"Harry. Please."
It takes every effort to tear himself away from Draco's arse, but he knows he wants to do everything in his power to make this good for Draco.
He reaches over to the table again, to rummage in the drawer for some lube. Grabbing it, Harry whispers in Draco's ear. "I'm going to place a Prophylactic Charm."
"Yeah. Okay," Draco huffs out. Harry watches as Draco's right hand curls around his own cock, and Harry's cock twitches at the sight-it's been ignored long enough. He murmurs the safety spell. It's been a long while since he's done it. With Jérôme, it'd been a few times until they had been decided to be monogamous. He doesn't exactly have the time to discuss previous lovers with Draco at the moment, nor does he want to think about that right now. The idea of another man being with Draco like this would only drive him mad.
Two lube-slicked fingers enter Draco, and he tightens around Harry's touch. "Fuck, you're so tight," Harry says as he starts to push in and out of Draco, getting him more stretched and ready.
"I'll make it so good for you, Draco."
"Promises, Potter," Draco teases, pushing back on Harry's fingers. "Put your cock where your mouth's been." The last words are strained in between pants and moans, and Harry knows he needs to take Draco now. He really cannot wait any longer.
"Let me see you," Harry says, pushing Draco on his side so he can eventually turn on his back. When Draco follows Harry's nudge, he spreads his legs before he pulls them all the way back to his chest.
"Like this?" he asks, sounding nervous.
"Yeah. Exactly like this."
Harry lines his cock to Draco's entrance and pushes in. Draco hisses slightly, but his eyes are wide open and he's looking right at Harry. It's intoxicating.
"I love you, you know," Harry says, grabbing Draco's hips and pushing in deeper before pulling out and doing it again. He's struggling to take his time, because all he wants to do is drive himself in, and be hard and fast; he's never been this patient. But he needs to take his time.
"Yeah?" Draco says with a smile. "Good. More." He lets go of his legs so he can wrap them around Harry's waist. "Don't be gentle with me."
"Draco-"
"No. Please. Harder. Please." He arches up so he can match Harry's thrusts and push down on Harry's cock. "Please, Harry."
That's all the motivation Harry needs, and he starts pounding into Draco with abandon. He gives it his all three, four, five times, before he pulls out and does it again. Eventually, changing his angle to get in deeper, to make Draco moan louder.
He's surprised at how long he's already lasted, but when Draco starts tugging on his cock, matching Harry's thrusts, Harry can't help himself. They come nearly in unison. Harry grabs the back of Draco's legs and places them on his shoulders, so he can thrust into him a few more times before emptying himself completely.
He all but crashes on top of Draco, their chests sweaty and their foreheads damp. Still, Harry starts kissing Draco again. First his neck, then his jawline, until he reaches Draco's lips, and their mouths are inseparable.
If he never gets to have sex with Draco again, it'll be okay, but he doesn't know if he can ever live without kissing Draco. It's all he needs.
"Will you stay?" Harry says, after he's placed a half-hearted cleansing spell. He knows they both will need a shower anyway.
Draco laughs. "I couldn't go anywhere even if I wanted to." He's still out of breath and Harry likes knowing he's the reason for it.
"Good," Harry says before he wraps his arm around Draco and falls asleep.
*Harry is in the house kitchen, flipping pancakes in nothing but his boxers, and Draco is sitting in Harry's dressing gown at the chair on the kitchen island. Sirius and Remus are gone until the new year, so he might as well use their fully stocked kitchen rather than scrounge for things in his own pathetic one.
After he places a pancake on Draco's plate, he leans in and kisses Draco again. Draco wraps his leg around Harry's waist and pulls him closer. There's a crackling noise, and Harry thinks it's the bacon that's simmering, but of course, he's wrong.
"Don't you have your own flat for these kind of things?" Sirius's voice is stern and it gives Harry a start. Draco's face is just turning red when Harry pulls away from him, and Draco turns away towards the wall, covering his eyes with his hands.
"You were not supposed to be back for another ten days," Harry says in an accusing tone, although he has no right, since Sirius is technically right.
"Erm... Surprise?" Remus says, looking amused and embarrassed at the same time.
Harry looks back at Sirius, who looks angry for just about two more seconds before he starts laughing hysterically. Harry scowls at Sirius, but he looks perplexed now. "Where did he go?"
Harry turns to look where he knows Draco to have sat, finding out that he’s vanished. He couldn't have Apparated, Harry knows. Then he turns to look towards the window and he finds a butterfly sitting on a small vase of tulips. Harry chuckles before he approaches it and the butterfly flies on top of Harry's index finger.
"I think you're being rather silly," Harry says to the butterfly and both Sirius and Remus look at him in confusion. "Come on, now."
Then the butterfly flaps its wings a few times in the air before Draco Transfigures back. "Sorry," he says, shrugging. "Defence mechanism, I suppose."
"Oh," Sirius says and at the same time Remus mutters, "Mr Malfoy."
They haven't been around to know the latest in Harry's life. Of course, Harry didn't get a chance to tell them he'd seen Draco again or that he'd asked him out to dinner. The shock of Draco being there is rather evident on their faces, but Sirius schools his expression quickly while Remus is still gaping.
"Hi," Draco says, looking painfully uncomfortable. At least he's wearing a dressing gown. Harry's only in his boxers.
"Not exactly how I imagined meeting my cousin," Sirius says, and Harry can tell he's trying really hard not to laugh.
"Merlin," Draco mumbles and hides his face behind his hand again.
"Breakfast?" Harry offers cheerfully. "Why don't you two get settled and we'll go and get dressed, so we can have breakfast together."
"Sounds good. Let's go, Sirius," Remus says and starts pulling on Sirius's arm.
"But I-"
"No, Sirius."
They're out of the kitchen and Harry looks at Draco, whose face is burning up, and is looking conflicted. "What's wrong?" Harry asks, worried.
"I don't have any other clothes than that Muggle suit I wore," Draco says wearily.
"You can borrow something of mine," Harry says, feeling relieved. He'd thought it was something more serious. He wraps his arm around Draco's waist and Apparates them to his flat.
"This is so embarrassing," Draco says, sitting on the bed. "This is not how I pictured meeting your family."
"Hey, you're part of the family now too," Harry says, throwing a t-shirt and jeans towards Draco. "This is very normal for us."
"Oh," is all Draco says in return.
Harry stops getting dressed mid-way and looks at Draco. "I mean, you want to be, don't you?" God, how could he just throw something like that at Draco? Again Harry jumped and made assumptions, without asking Draco the question properly.
"Yes. Of course. I just-"
"Draco?"
"Yes."
"Do you want to be my boyfriend?" He asks and before Draco can answer he adds, "I wanted to ask you when we'd got back to Hogwarts after Christmas hols. But, I never got the chance. So I'm asking you now, before it's too late. I told you last night: I love you."
"You mean, you loved me."
"No, Draco," Harry says, shaking his head. "I still love you."
Draco's expression is unreadable for a few moments before he smiles so wide it makes Harry's heart melt. "Yes."
"Yes?"
"I want to be your boyfriend."
"Good," Harry says, pulling Draco in for a kiss.
"...And I still love you, too."
Harry has heard love declarations from many others before, but they never filled him with the warmth and excitement the way they do when coming from Draco. He smiles against Draco's lips. "You know this doesn't mean I'm going to sell my brooms to the Ministry for a discount price..."
"We'll see," Draco says, shrugging. "I'm sure Percy will have thoughts on the matter."Draco Malfoy knows a great many things. Sadly, the only thing he didn't know was how much Harry Potter loved him.
But now he does, and now he'll make sure never to disappear from him again.FIN
Author/Artist: digthewriter
Word Count: 22,300
Pairing: Harry/Draco; Ron/Hermione, Theo/Blaise, Seamus/Pansy, Percy/Oliver, Ginny/Dean, Sirius/Remus
Rating: NC-17
Summary: At the age of seventeen, Harry finds himself falling in love with a detached Draco Malfoy. Through a series of unfortunate miscommunications and gossip, he had a bad falling out (of love), too. Now, years later, can Harry make amends about a misunderstanding? Would Draco forgive him?
READ PART ONE
READ PART TWO
17th December, 2003"Draco..."
The glass shatters on the ground first. Clearly, Harry startled him. Then, Draco hangs his head low. Harry has no idea if he is going to get a hex, a scolding for invading someone's privacy, or be just flat out ignored.
Eventually, he turns around, and his sharp gaze nearly cuts Harry through and through.
Harry opens his mouth slightly to say something. He could apologise for disturbing Draco. He could pretend he got lost. No, he is just going to stand there; he is going to stand his ground. He has nothing to apologise for. It's been six years, and there is no going back.
"Potter," Draco says, his face as impassive as it could ever be. "Enjoying yourself?"
Harry shrugs. "As much as a single person can at an event celebrating love," he says. "At least there's free alcohol."
Draco chuckles. He fucking chuckles! "Indeed," he says a moment later, and straightens up. It's as if he'd forgotten who he's talking to.
"Do you need help with that?" Harry points at the shattered glass at Draco's feet.
"No need," Draco replies, and he removes his wand from his pocket. With a nonverbal spell, the glass materialises into its old form, and it floats in the air until it settles on the table next to the Firewhisky bottle.
"Drinking alone?"
"Just needed a moment," Draco says; he taps the glass on the table, and so it turns into two. Clearly, Draco has a few tricks up his sleeve. He always did. "I'm not used to so many people at my house. Not since I was a child and my parents hosted these lavish parties. I thought I could handle it-play host for Pansy's sake. Not as easy as it seems."
He pours two small shots in both glasses and offers one to Harry.
Harry finally steps all the way onto the veranda, and he can feel the heating charm that's there.
"Cheers," Draco says and he taps his glass with Harry's.
"What should we drink to?"
Draco shrugs. "You can decide."
"Making amends?" Harry says in a hopeful tone. "Maybe...second chances?"
Draco gives him a curt nod and downs the drink in one go. Harry does the same. It's bitter, but it goes down smooth. This isn't the stuff they're serving at the party. Harry can tell this is the vintage stuff, the kind of drinks Lucius Malfoy would keep in the basement of the house. The kind Sirius and Remus hold onto for special occasions.
"It's good," Harry says.
"Do you know much about Firewhisky?" Draco asks, sounding slightly curious.
"I know what tastes good," Harry says, chuckling. He realises what's he's just tasted is the same taste that's in Draco's mouth. If he were to kiss Draco right now, would he taste similar?
"Hmm." Draco turns around to look at the snow in the garden again. The empty glass, still in his hand.
Harry steps in further and grabs the bottle. He tops himself off and offers to pour some in Draco's glass. Draco accepts.
Now they’re standing next to each other, and this is the closest Harry has been to Draco since they left Hogwarts. It's the scent that does him in again. That fucking smell. What is it? Is it his cologne? Has he been using the same thing forever or is it just something that's just Draco?
"You smell the same." Wait, did Harry just say that out loud? He must be more inebriated than he realised. He was fine drinking wine up until he'd entered the veranda. Two shots of Firewhisky. When did Harry become such a lightweight?
"Pardon me?" Draco's curious tone remains, and he turns to look at Harry, one eyebrow raised.
"That's how I always knew you were around," Harry says. In for the sickle, in for the knut.
"Around where?"
"Hogwarts," Harry says. One word. "I knew you were around because of your scent." This is the only chance Harry has. He'd tried to write to Draco in the past, and Draco never opened his letters. There was always some force of nature that was betting against them and winning. He needs this night to tell Draco everything. If he'll keep him here for the rest of it, just so he can come clean, he will.
Draco frowns. It's that look Harry hasn't seen since their time in the library. When Draco read Harry's essays and gave a look of, What the fuck are you on, Potter?
"I've read your book, Draco," Harry says. Realisation slightly dawns on Draco's face, but there's so much more to this. "Even if I hadn't, I'd have known," he adds.
Harry knows more about Draco than Draco realises. He knows more about Draco than he gives himself credit for. He knows Draco was doing really well at the DMLE as a Junior Auror and he was making a name for himself. When he'd opted to work in the office as a trainer instead of becoming an Auror supervisor, rumours about his sexuality were starting to discredit him from his work.
Being gay in the wizarding world isn't a big deal, but discrimination can be found everywhere. Draco was starting to face it in his workplace. And Harry was aware of a lot of Draco's struggles. Between what was being published in the Prophet, Ron, Hermione, Percy's rants, and Nott's conversations with Harry, Harry was always kept updated.
Eventually, Draco had contracted with a publishing company and wrote a textbook he'd offered to McGonagall and Dumbledore to add into the course curriculum for Transfiguration.
My life as a butterfly.
The book, written more as a memoir than anything else, examines various forms of Transfigurations one could have, and the easy spells that surrounded them. It is an in-depth research of pushing the limits of the rules of Gamp's Law of Self Transfiguration. It also discusses Draco coming to terms with his own homosexuality at the age of twelve and deciding nothing was going to keep him away from reaching for his dreams.
Each chapter reviews the benefits of Transfiguring into various creatures, along with several pages that focus on the black and green bug that blends into the background. The butterfly reference was more towards his sexuality than his Animagus, which Draco claimed he could never really settle on.
Draco doesn't necessarily look surprised. It was the number one bestseller for six months, even if it was featured as a textbook, one that eventually led him into the role as an Undercover Investigation trainer.
"All that time I spent with you in the library," Harry says with a soft smile. "Turns out, I like reading."
"The scent lingers," Draco says in deep thought. Leave it to him to turn Harry's attempt at a confession into a scholastic matter.
"Yeah. It does." Harry turns to look at him wondering what he's going to do now? They're face to face after so long. What's the next step? Is Draco going to slap him? Tell him to fuck off? Or send Snape to fight his battles again.
Okay, maybe Harry's still a bit bitter about that.
He fetches into his pocket and brings out the tulip he'd nicked from the dining hall. He offers it to Draco. The bug, it was his favourite thing to nibble on.
Draco looks down at the flower for a long while, but he doesn't take it. "What do you want, Potter?"
What does Harry want? All those years spent practicing what he was going to say to Draco, and now he feels hesitant. He has to make it worth it.
"Why do you order my brooms?" Okay, maybe it’s not the best thing to say, but jumping in before thinking has always been kind of Harry's thing.
"Because they are the best in the country." Draco's response is so matter-of-fact that Harry wants to argue, but it's also a compliment so Harry knows he shouldn't argue.
Harry opens his mouth again, unsure of what he's about to say, when Millicent taps on the door that leads into the veranda.
"Draco, it's time."
Harry turns to look at Millicent, who gives him a quick smile and then looks at Draco expectantly. Harry watches Draco as he searches for something in his pocket, and he freezes the moment he's taken it out. Of course he hadn't thought about the fact that Harry is standing right there. He quickly glances at his pocket watch and then closes it up before placing it back to where it came from. "Be there in a moment, Millie."
The pocket watch. Harry's pocket watch, the one he'd given to Draco for Christmas when they were seventeen.
I was in love with you. Harry wants to say. Instead, he blurts out, "You look hot." He puts the tulip on the lapel of his robe.
Draco gives him a look of utter confusion and annoyance. His brows furrow and his eyes slightly narrow. They're the same height, yet Harry can't help but think of how tall Draco is all of a sudden.
"Just wanted to say that. In case no one else has."
"I'm needed," Draco says, pointing at the exit door and a moment later, has disappeared into it.
"Yes. You are," Harry mumbles to himself and makes his way back to the ballroom.
*Soon, Harry finds out, it's time for cake. The happy couple makes a show of cutting the cake while champagne is served, then everybody toasts. They look ecstatic to have their best friends standing by their side for this joyful occasion. Dean and Draco take pictures with Seamus and Pansy while they are being fussed over by the professional photographer.
The rest of the evening is a blur. The guests leave one by one and Harry tries to linger on for as long as he can. Luna has had too much champagne, so Neville offers to take her home. If it were anyone else, Harry would have been worried, but he knows she'll be safe with Neville.
"You coming, mate?" Ron asks Harry just as he and Hermione are about to step into the Floo.
"I'll be heading home in a few. I'll catch up with you later," Harry says and they nod, hesitating a bit, but leave anyway.
Seamus and Pansy are sitting on an armchair in the corner, snogging, while Draco stands by the Floo, one hand behind his back and the other holding a champagne glass as he bids the guests goodbye. Harry approaches him cautiously.
A curt nod, then, "Potter."
"Draco..."
"Thank you for attending."
"Can we-"
He starts to walk away. "I have to deal with some last minute details, if you don't mind-"
"I mind."
"What?"
"What if I told you, I mind?"
"Potter, this isn't the place."
"When is the place? Or the time?" Harry is calm, despite the nervousness he feels in his heart, despite the anger he feels in the pit of his stomach.
"I don't-"
Harry takes a deep breath. "I don't want to talk about this tonight," he says, to which Draco's eyes widen. "I just want to have dinner with you. You name the place and time. I just want to talk. Then."
"Very well. I'm free on Saturday evening."
Harry raises an eyebrow. This is almost too easy.
Draco rolls his eyes. "I will not reschedule, I promise."
"Are you sure...?"
"Potter."
"Brilliant." Harry resists the attempt to not push his luck any further, he Disapparates from the Malfoy Manor, only to crash on his bed at home. Draco's agreed to go to dinner with him on Saturday. He can only hope he has the patience to last until then.
Before undressing, Harry takes the tulip off his robe and places it under a stasis charm so it's still fresh in the morning when he wakes up.
*The next day when Harry arrives at Lightning Spotters, he has an idea. He brings out the latest broom he's working on and wraps it to mail it off. He summons his owl and sends the broom to the Ministry, to the DMLE. Specifically, to Draco Malfoy.
I'm sending you my latest ideas for a new broom, along with the specifics. Please let me know what you think of them. Perhaps we can discuss them over coffee this evening?
The response comes almost immediately.
Potter, the new broom looks good. I do have some ideas for improvement, but we are already meeting on Saturday, let's discuss it then.
Harry smiles at the parchment and writes a swift reply. Draco, I'd rather not discuss business on the evening of our date. But, if you don't want to meet this evening, that's not a problem. I'm just glad to know you still remember our arrangement.
Harry returns to work, and tending to his customers as the day goes on. He doesn't have to wait long until another reply arrives.
You all but refused to leave my home last evening unless I agreed to go out with you. Trust me, I'm far too familiar with your tactics. I'm well aware, if I'd not agreed to meeting you on Saturday, you would only badger me until I'd said yes. And I didn't say it was a date.
Harry scowls at the letter. It's a date.
During lunch, when his assistant comes into the shop for her shift, Harry goes to the flower shop two doors over, and buys a bouquet of tulips. He sends them to Draco with a note that says: It's a date.
Another response comes, but it's not from Draco, but Percy.
Harry, the Minister wants to know if you're going to be dating a DMLE employee, can we get your brooms on a discount?
Harry throws his head back and laughs as hard as he can. He can only write one thing, No, Weatherby. I'll only charge double.
On the next day, Harry sends another bouquet of tulips to Draco, reminding them of their date, and a Say Hi to Percy for me.
*Harry arrives at the gates of the Malfoy Manor where a house-elf greets him. They walk into the main hall, and the room looks exceptionally different from a few days ago when Seamus and Pansy's party was here.
Draco walks into the room wearing a Muggle suit, and Harry's glad he too had opted for wearing formal Muggle wear. Not necessarily a suit like Draco's, but a silk dress shirt with black trousers, and a lightweight black jumper. He doesn’t look nearly as good as Draco.
His hair looks the same from the other night, and Harry didn't think it could have got more sexier. But it has. His lips are wet as if he'd just placed some sort of balm on them, probably because of the cold weather, and Harry has to remind himself he should not stare at Draco's lips the entire night.
He could, but he shouldn't.
"Ready?" Harry asks, struggling to sound casual. He reaches in his back pocket and pulls out a red tulip to hand to Draco.
Draco scowls, but Harry can tell he isn't that upset. "Your little gesture has really made a mockery out of me at the office," he says, before he takes the flower and places it in the inside pocket of his suit jacket.
"Why? Did Percy get jealous he isn't the only one that gets flowers delivered to him at the Ministry?" Harry says before he takes Draco's arm.
Draco smiles at Harry's comment but doesn't respond to it.
If Harry had thought Draco was tight lipped when they were together at Hogwarts, it doesn't even compare to how quiet he is now. At least before, he had been able to decipher what Draco's expressions, silence, and smiles meant. But now, it's like he has to start from scratch again.
"Where are we going?" Draco asks, looking down at Harry's hold on his arm.
"To a Muggle restaurant," Harry replies. "Is that okay?"
Draco nods with his usual impassiveness.
"I'll have to Apparate us there, to an Apparition point near the restaurant, and then walk from there. Is that okay?"
"Certainly."
"Brilliant." It's all Harry can say since he's at a loss for words with Draco being so close to him. His scent is intoxicating and Harry wonders if there really is something about being Animagi or a morphing expert that makes the scent stronger. He could always tell Sirius had entered the room before he'd even look up.
He has to concentrate extra hard because of Draco being there with him. He doesn't want to accidentally splinch himself or worse, Draco, and when they arrive at the alley just around the corner from the Muggle restaurant, Harry releases a sigh of relief.
"Been a while?" Draco asks, and Harry can't help but wonder if there's a tone of concern hidden in his voice.
"Just when doing it with another person," Harry says with a smile.
"Don't Apparate much with other people, do you?"
"No," Harry says, shaking his head. He places a warming charm on himself and Draco before they begin to walk towards the restaurant. "It's been awhile since I've Apparated with someone."
Draco nods, looking down on to the ground. Their arms brush slightly, but Harry doesn't pull away. Neither does Draco.
"What about you?" Harry asks.
"Are we talking about Apparating, Potter?"
"You know we're not, Draco."
Draco looks like he's going to tell Harry it's none of his business, or just to shut up, or maybe he'll just walk away; but he releases a resigned sigh, instead. "It's been at least a year since I've Apparated..." He looks confused for a moment, "...with someone."
"Hmm. So you do date."
"It's been known to happen."
"So all that stuff about Pureblood expectations and finding the right partner to marry-"
"Those are all true," Draco says with a defensive tone. "Just because I wasn't a tart at Hogwarts..."
"Right," Harry says and he turns to point at the entrance of the restaurant. "We're here."
They enter Chez Henri and the hostess takes their coats promptly, before she seats them at a corner table. The restaurant isn't very full as it is the holidays and most people spend time with their families during this time of the year, and that's precisely why Harry picked this restaurant. He wanted to be out somewhere with Draco, but not in a place that was too crowded.
"Shall I suggest a bottle of wine to start?" the waiter says a moment after he approaches their table and hands them a menu.
Harry eyes Draco, who looks uncomfortable. He turns to the waiter and speaks before Draco can say anything. "I'm not drinking tonight. I'll have a café au lait, if you wouldn't mind." He looks at Draco who nods in the affirmative. "Make that two, please."
"Very well, Messieurs. I'll be right back."
"Still not much of a drinker, then?" Harry asks casually as he peruses the appetizer list. He saw Draco with that bottle of Firewhisky the night of the party, maybe he just likes the hard stuff.
"Not with dinner, not usually. I'm afraid I had a bit too much to drink late into the evening on Wednesday, and I'd rather not make it a habit."
"The Firewhisky. That can be an expensive habit."
"Undoubtedly. Especially if you let Pansy near that stuff."
"So if you're not getting drunk alone on the veranda at a party, when do you usually drink?"
Draco shrugged. "I tend to have a glass of wine when I settle in with a good book."
Harry nodded. "Yeah. Me too. Except, I don't know anything about wines. I just grab whatever Remus has in the cellar."
"Professor Lupin?" Draco asks, with an eyebrow raised.
"Yeah, he and Sirius have been together for I don't know something like twenty years. I still stay at home with Sirius, since Remus is usually gone for most of the school year, and I've got my own private flat in the attic."
Draco looks thoughtful. "Must be nice to be near family."
"Where are your parents?" Harry focuses on showing concern in his voice. He wants Draco to know that he really does care.
"In France, mostly. Father doesn't approve of me working for the DMLE. He thinks I should have joined the family business. I have other opinions about that..."
"Yeah, I think Sirius was disappointed I didn't want to work in the shop with him, but I think he's happy with me being next door." They are quiet for a while, and Harry struggles to find things to say. He has stuff to say, he just isn't sure if that kind of stuff should be said right now.
"You should come by and say hello to Sirius."
Draco looks up at him, seemingly slightly confused.
"I mean, you're cousins, right? I know there's some family falling out - I don't really know all the details, but yeah - I'm sure Sirius would love to see you."
"Right," Draco says, hesitantly.
"I didn't mean tonight. I meant-just some time. They're not even in the country. You know, because you're not coming over to my place tonight...I mean, unless you want to. Or not. I'm not trying to-"
"Ready to order?" The waiter steps in at precisely the right time, and Harry is relieved beyond all reason. He'd not been this nervous on a date with anyone since-well since Draco. And here they are.
It's too quiet at the table again. The appetizer has come and gone and the main course is being served. Harry orders a lamb dish while Draco opts for the vegetarian quinoa and squash dish.
"I was in love with you, you know," Harry says, finally, when the silence has been lingering for too long, and he knows if he doesn't just say it now-if he would never say it.
Draco drops his fork into his dish and looks up at Harry, visibly annoyed.
"Just thought you should know. The thing with Alan-what you heard-it wasn't true."
Draco opens his mouth to say something when they are interrupted by someone. Someone Harry hadn't expected.
"Harry?" He hears, recognising the French accent in an instant. Jérôme’s soft voice brings memories to Harry’s mind.
He hadn't thought about Jérôme, not really, ever since they'd broken up over nine months ago, and he really hadn't thought Jérôme would still be in London.
Harry stands up off his chair in haste and nearly tips his water glass over. "Jérôme!" Harry also dropped his serviette on the floor and he bends down to pick it up hurriedly. "What-what are you doing here?" When Jérôme raises an eyebrow at him, he adds, "I thought you'd be with your family for Christmas."
"I had some work to finish up," Jérôme says, drawling. "I leave tomorrow via..." He looks around at the Muggles that surround them. "Well, you know how."
"Right," Harry says; he can still feel his face flushing. Jérôme turns to look at Draco and Harry's gaze follows Jérôme's to find Draco looking at the both of them with intense interest.
Harry shakes his head and relaxes slightly. "Jérôme, this is my friend, Draco Malfoy. Draco, this is Jérôme."
"Jérôme Barnet," Draco says; Harry can tell it isn’t a question. He gracefully stands up from his seat and offers his hand to Jérôme. "I'm a fan of your work."
"Oh," Jérôme says; now his face slightly flushing. "I didn't realise- Of course, you're not Muggle." His gaze went up and down Draco, taking in Draco's clothing, and maybe more. Harry watches them interact with faint discomfort.
Draco chuckles. "Hardly. Harry and I are friends from school."
"Ah, how could I forget," Jérôme says, as if he's just had a sudden realisation about something. "You wrote all those Transfiguration books and that memoir of yours Harry loves so much." He rolls his eyes when he looks at Harry, clearly seeing Harry's embarrassment.
"Oh, come on, Harry. It's hardly a secret. In the middle of the night, I'd wake up and see Harry with one of your books in his lap and a glass of wine in hand. I should have known then," Jérôme says.
"Known what?" Draco asks; his face is either intrigue or annoyance, Harry can't tell.
"The one that got away," Jérôme says casually. He turns to look at someone a few tables over. "Well, I must be off. Sorry to disturb your dinner. Have a nice Christmas, gentlemen." He tips his head slightly and then walks off, leaving Harry and Draco standing by their table, staring at each other.
They take their seats once again, and Harry wishes he had something stronger to drink than just water. He motions over to the waiter and asks for two Scotch whiskies.
"So, an ex-boyfriend, I take it," Draco says with a hint of amusement Harry didn't know he'd missed until he took a note of it this time. He gave Harry a smirk, as if he were thinking of a million different jokes about Harry having dated a Wizard Fashion Stylist, not to mention makeup artist for the Weird Sisters.
Harry shrugged. "I like 'em pretty," he said in a joking tone and gives a nervous chuckle.
"I'm sure," Draco says casually. "Apparate much, did you?"
Harry coughs with surprise. "For eight months, until-"
The waiter stopped by their table to drop off the whiskies.
"Until?" Draco asks.
"Until March. Right around Ron's birthday."
"That's not what you were going to say."
"We were planning on going to Nice for a Spring festival with his family. It was all fine until I overheard him discussing wedding plans, and I..." Harry shrugged. "I was never one to settle down so quickly."
"Right," Draco says, thoughtfully. He sips on his whiskey as Harry finishes his in one gulp.
"I suppose I'm still looking for someone who can give me the freedom to be."
Draco scrutinises him with his sharp gaze. His grey eyes seem to be pinning Harry in the chair. "That's a title of one of my chapters."
"I know," Harry says with a smile. He is too nervous for this, but tries not to show it. He'd wanted to impress Draco, show him he'd changed. To tell him he used to love him, and then Jérôme showed up out of nowhere, and Draco didn’t really bat an eyelash about it.
"Do you want to get dessert or another cup of coffee?" Harry asks after their table has been cleared away.
"No. I'm fine, thank you," Draco replies and Harry summons for the bill. When Harry is getting ready to pay, Draco stops him for a moment. "Are you sure? I have Muggle-"
"It's all right, Draco. I asked you to dinner, remember?"
Draco nods and Harry almost says Draco can pay next time, but he doesn't want to push his luck.
After grabbing their coats from the hostess, they walk in silence. Harry purposely leads Draco away from the Apparition point. He's not sure if Draco knows or has just chosen to not say anything. They're walking more into the centre of the city and it's freezing. He didn't get a chance to cast a warming spell on them, but Draco isn't complaining. In fact, Draco isn't saying anything at all.
"About what I said earlier..." Harry says quietly. "Before Jérôme stopped by the table."
Draco stops and turns to look at Harry. It's as if he's expecting an apology or an excuse; maybe he's waiting for Harry to take it back. Harry has no idea what Draco thinks of him. Does he still hate him?
Draco's hand is in his right pocket and he's fidgeting with something. He reaches down to take Draco's hand in his. Draco easily releases whatever he's holding onto in his pocket and his fingers entwine with Harry's. It's almost as if the six years haven't passed and they are back to where they'd started from.
"Alan was a wanker," Harry whispers, looking into Draco's eyes.
"I don't really want to talk about Alan right now," Draco says.
Harry gives him a huge smile and Draco's eyes flash over to Harry's lips before he catches Harry's gaze again. Harry can't help himself and does the same, licking his lips at the same time. Shite. What he wouldn't give to taste those lips right now.
Every kiss Harry's ever had since Hogwarts, he'd wondered if they'd taste as good as Draco.
"You still have the pocket watch," Harry says. He suspects the thing in Draco’s pocket is the watch itself.
"Yes. It's proved to be useful," Draco says, before biting his lower lip.
Something has clearly changed between them. Harry now knows that Draco doesn't hate him. But all this back and forth is driving him mad.
If Harry's honest with himself, he's getting frustrated. Honestly, this has gone on for far too long. "You never gave me my Christmas present," he says. "I mean, it's only fair since you still use mine."
Draco steps closer and Harry's arms instinctively wrap around Draco's waist. "This doesn't mean I forgive you," Draco says.
"This doesn't mean I forgive you," Harry says.
Draco nods curtly. "Fair enough."
Harry caresses Draco's cheek with the back of his hand and Draco leans into the touch. His lower lip is trembling, and Harry wonders if it's from need or from the cold. Maybe just a little bit of both.
"Drac-"
Draco's lips are on Harry's before he can even finish saying his name. His first impression is of the chilliness of Draco's lips, with the warmth of his mouth. He tastes like the whiskey they'd had with a hint of squash and coffee. Harry takes in a deep breath and sucks on Draco's lower lip with desperation. Draco's hands tighten around Harry's waist, and Harry never ever wants him to let go.
The kiss is everything. Everything Harry's ever wanted. Until Draco slightly probes Harry's mouth with his tongue and Harry parts his lips to give Draco the permission to enter. Now, it's everything he never knew he needed.
Harry doesn't know when his hands found themselves inside Draco's coat, but he's got a tight hold on Draco - pulling him closer - pressing their hips together. Draco moans in his mouth, and if that isn't the sexiest thing Harry’s ever heard.
It's nearly Christmas. It's Christmas six years later, and he finally has what he'd always wanted. He finally has Draco back in his arms.
A group of girls walk by them and they giggle, finally making Harry realise where he is. They break apart panting, only their lips though, as Harry's arms are still tight around Draco.
"Do you want to Apparate with me?" It's the only thing that comes to Harry's mind, and he curses himself for being ridiculous.
"I-"
"Not tonight. Maybe some other evening, you can come over to my flat and maybe I can make you dinner..." Harry gives him a soft smile. He hopes he hasn't offended Draco or crossed the line.
Harry tries to look at Draco, watching for his reaction, and trying to imagine what he's thinking. But he can’t help himself and his gaze constantly flickers to Draco’s lips. He leans down and kisses Draco again, pulling him tighter this time. He pushes his tongue into Draco's mouth and allows Draco to suck on it. He needs Draco to show Harry how much Draco wants it too.
Draco doesn't seem to mind. He's willingly kissing Harry back-sucking and moaning while his fingers pull on Harry's coat.
"Right..." Harry says as they break for breath again. "I was saying..."
"Yeah, you were," Draco says before he's kissing Harry again. Harry has no idea when they'd started to move, but he's now pressed against a wall and Draco is settled between his legs. He's biting Harry's lower lip and Harry's glasses are so fogged up, he can't see anything. He lets go of his hold on Draco just to remove his glasses and they fall on the ground. Harry doesn't give a damn. He doesn't give a damn about anything but Draco Malfoy. Kissing Draco Malfoy. Having Draco Malfoy kiss him back.
This time, when they break apart, Harry rests his forehead against Draco's. He marvels at the fact that it took him so long to share a kiss with Draco, and it now seems like the stupidest thing in the world. The fact that he didn't do it years and years ago makes him feel like it's the only regret in his life.
How many men did Draco kiss in all those years? How many men did Harry waste time kissing, when he could have been kissing Draco instead?
Draco's eyes are closed, but Harry's eyes rest on Draco's lips again. They're red, full, and slightly bruised, and Harry mentally kicks himself for being turned on by that. Still, he wants to do more damage. He wants to make Draco, beg, and moan, and whimper and all sorts of things two people do when they're so passionate about each other.
These few minutes with Draco are so much more in comparison to the eight months he'd spent with Jérôme or any other man for that matter.
It couldn't be right, could it? Is this just the heat of the moment talking or is Harry still - in love with Draco?
Harry's hands around Draco's waist become bolder as he gently starts to massage him under his coat. He drops a few small kisses on Draco's chin and jaw, before settling on Draco's lips again.
Draco presses his body against Harry's. Now when they grind their hips together, Harry can feel how hard they both are. How desperate Harry is for Draco and well, if his erection is anything to go by, how Draco wants him just as badly.
"If I'd known you kiss like this," Harry says softly. He doesn't want to break the moment between them.
"I never would have passed any of my classes," Draco says.
Harry laughs against Draco's lips before he gently kisses him again. "So you're saying you kept me waiting, because..."
"I was afraid the physical relationship would hinder me from my goals," Draco says, kissing Harry back; small kisses in between his words.
"You did have a lot of expectations laid upon your shoulders," Harry says, thoughtfully.
"Watching you..." Draco pauses for a moment, "in your room. That was-that had to suffice for some time." It comes out like a confession and Harry can tell that Draco means it that way.
"I knew you were there," Harry says, almost triumphantly. "In the beginning, at least."
"You used to say my name."
"I still do."
Draco's eyes widen at the implication of Harry's statement. "Potter-"
"Harry," Harry says as he brushes his thumb over Draco's lower lip.
"Fuck me."
"What?" Harry's hand stills on Draco's jaw and his eyes are on Draco's again.
"I was in love with you too," Draco says, gasping for breath as he ruts against Harry with his hands in Harry's hair, tugging on his locks, and he pulls Harry in for a deep kiss again. "I've been a fool. Focusing on school, and then my career, thinking I could forget about you. I don't want to wait another six years for-"
"Okay," Harry says and he wants to stop. He wants to stop, and take a step back before he's ready to take Draco home; but they're standing in a dark corner of the street and it's so cold out that there aren't any Muggles around. It's like they're the same horny teenagers, but now, Harry's allowed to touch Draco in places he couldn't before. He's allowed to show Draco how much he wants him. His hand travels down to cup Draco's balls before he rubs Draco's erection with his palm, and then unzips Draco's trousers.
Draco's eyes are closed; he looks like he's doing his best to keep his composure - and failing miserably. His cock is hot in Harry's hand and, fuck, it's nice and firm. Harry starts to stroke it gently at first, but it isn't long until he's really tugging on it. Draco bites his lip and he thrusts his hips slightly, fucking Harry's hand. Harry is sure this isn't what Draco meant, but he's right-they've waited six years.
After this, Harry is going to take Draco home. And they'll do it nice and proper in Harry's bed or maybe in the shower. But, he knows this isn't the end, it's just the beginning.
Harry sees the hesitation on Draco's face. He leans in and kisses Draco again. All he wants to do is kiss Draco all the time. "Do it," he whispers against Draco's lips. "Come for me, Draco."
Draco opens his mouth and releases a small groan before he lets go, and he's spilling in Harry's hand, still pumping in and out until he's good and done for-until the last drop.
"Bugger," Draco says looking down at Harry's clothes. He's made quite a mess, but Harry doesn't mind; doesn't care, because Draco is there and they are together.
Harry reaches into his coat and pulls out his wand to spell himself clean as Draco quickly tucks his prick inside his trousers.
Draco starts to say something, "I don't know what-"
"It's okay. I wanted this."
"You wanted this?" Draco says, half laughing.
"Okay, maybe not exactly this...in a dark street corner, but you know, this." He motions between the two of them before he pulls Draco closer. "Come home with me tonight."
"If you insist," Draco says with a straight face, but Harry can see the desire in Draco's eyes. There's no doubt about it, Draco wants to go home with him.
"I insist," Harry says. He shifts sideways to pick up his glasses off the ground. Thankfully, they aren't broken. When he looks at Draco again, he smiles, "Just hold onto me." A moment later, he Apparates them into his flat.
*His flat isn't anything monumental. Since he shares the house with Sirius and Remus, Harry spends most of his time downstairs. But his place has the privacy he needs: a small kitchen, a sitting room for when his friends visit, and a private bath. It also has its own Floo network and a private entrance.
"It's not much," he says to Draco.
Draco shrugs as he looks around. "It has a bed."
Harry grins at the comment. "That it does." He takes one step closer to Draco, removing the distance between them since they'd Apparated into the flat. "Draco-"
"Potter, I want to-"
"Harry."
"Harry." Draco rolls his eyes, but his hold on Harry remains tight. "I want to apologise for the way I treated you." Harry's slightly confused by the statement, but he doesn't say anything. He lets Draco talk. "When we were at Hogwarts...I was in love with you and kept you at an arm's length, because I was afraid you'd break my heart. Instead, I acted like an arsehole. I was irrational. I practically stalked you and then I pulled away. I don't deserve-"
Harry kisses Draco before he has a chance to finish. He's heard enough.
"Maybe we're both at fault," Harry says, "but it was a very long time ago. I just-I haven't been able to forget about you, and I don't want to dwell in the past. I just want this. Now."
Draco gives him half a smile. Harry kisses him again, and this time, deepens the kiss. Gods, he's really loving kissing Draco so much and can't imagine how he survived for so long without it.
He starts pushing Draco so he can start walking backwards, and they kiss and walk until the back of Draco's legs hit Harry's bed and then Harry's on top of him. They remove their coats in haste, then gently, he's pressing down at Draco's body and is amazed at how much Draco is allowing him to do everything.
Eventually, Harry pulls back and looks down at Draco. "You said it's been a while, but you have-"
Draco nods, looking slightly embarrassed. "Initially, I wanted you to be my first but-"
"But we broke up and you moved on."
Draco nods again, looking guilty. He looks away from Harry, seemingly not wanting Harry to judge his decision harshly.
"Sorry I never kissed you."
Then his gaze is back on Harry and Draco smiles, bites his lower lip, and props his head up to lay a quick kiss on Harry's lips. "You're making up for it now," he says and Harry smiles.
"How did you want me?" Draco asks after they've been kissing for a while. They're still fully dressed, except for the winter coats, and Harry hasn't had the time or the desire to do anything else at the moment. Sure, he wants Draco. He wants to be deep inside him, show him how much he loves him. How good he can make it for Draco, but just having this is enough for now.
"What?" Harry asks, confused.
"When you thought of me, while you were in your bed… you called my name. So how did you want me?"
"I wanted...I wanted..." Harry is panting as Draco is sucking on a spot on his neck. His hands are unbuttoning Harry's shirt. "On your knees, open you up with my tongue..."
Draco arches up as Harry presses down, grinding their groins together. Harry removes his sweater and throws it on the floor, and Draco's hands keep moving all over Harry's body, untucking the shirt, unbuckling the belt. They writhe against each other, unable to stop.
It's a struggle to get their clothes off completely. There are hands everywhere, mouths wanting to touch, lick, kiss, taste everything.
Finally, Harry's settled between Draco's legs. Their erections are rubbing together. Harry's been hard since the first moment his lips were pressed against Draco's, and now finally Draco is touching him. He's afraid he's going to come right then and there, just from Draco's rough strokes. It feels amazing and he knows he needs to pace himself.
He's about to say something to Draco when Draco's other hand rakes through Harry's hair. "I want you to do that."
"Do what?" Harry asks, softly.
Draco bites his lower lip as if he’s become shy all of a sudden. Harry smiles down at him, understanding what it is that Draco wants him to do, then removes his glasses to place them on the bedside table. He pulls back away and gives Draco's body a long hard look before his eyes are land on Draco's face again. "Turn around."
Draco sits up and follows Harry's request. He's on his knees, his face buried in the pillows as Harry reaches down and kisses the back of Draco's neck. Draco shivers slightly as if he hadn't been expecting that. What had he been expecting? Harry wonders. He starts to leave a trail of kisses all the way down Draco’s spine, until he reaches Draco's arse, and squeezes it. He licks at Draco's hole tentatively that results in a small whimper from Draco.
Harry does it again, and again, until he's really plunging in and out with vigour. Draco's moans only get louder. His cries of pleasure are ready to send Harry over the edge. God, like this, he won't survive inside Draco for even a minute. But it'll be worth it.
"Harry. Please."
It takes every effort to tear himself away from Draco's arse, but he knows he wants to do everything in his power to make this good for Draco.
He reaches over to the table again, to rummage in the drawer for some lube. Grabbing it, Harry whispers in Draco's ear. "I'm going to place a Prophylactic Charm."
"Yeah. Okay," Draco huffs out. Harry watches as Draco's right hand curls around his own cock, and Harry's cock twitches at the sight-it's been ignored long enough. He murmurs the safety spell. It's been a long while since he's done it. With Jérôme, it'd been a few times until they had been decided to be monogamous. He doesn't exactly have the time to discuss previous lovers with Draco at the moment, nor does he want to think about that right now. The idea of another man being with Draco like this would only drive him mad.
Two lube-slicked fingers enter Draco, and he tightens around Harry's touch. "Fuck, you're so tight," Harry says as he starts to push in and out of Draco, getting him more stretched and ready.
"I'll make it so good for you, Draco."
"Promises, Potter," Draco teases, pushing back on Harry's fingers. "Put your cock where your mouth's been." The last words are strained in between pants and moans, and Harry knows he needs to take Draco now. He really cannot wait any longer.
"Let me see you," Harry says, pushing Draco on his side so he can eventually turn on his back. When Draco follows Harry's nudge, he spreads his legs before he pulls them all the way back to his chest.
"Like this?" he asks, sounding nervous.
"Yeah. Exactly like this."
Harry lines his cock to Draco's entrance and pushes in. Draco hisses slightly, but his eyes are wide open and he's looking right at Harry. It's intoxicating.
"I love you, you know," Harry says, grabbing Draco's hips and pushing in deeper before pulling out and doing it again. He's struggling to take his time, because all he wants to do is drive himself in, and be hard and fast; he's never been this patient. But he needs to take his time.
"Yeah?" Draco says with a smile. "Good. More." He lets go of his legs so he can wrap them around Harry's waist. "Don't be gentle with me."
"Draco-"
"No. Please. Harder. Please." He arches up so he can match Harry's thrusts and push down on Harry's cock. "Please, Harry."
That's all the motivation Harry needs, and he starts pounding into Draco with abandon. He gives it his all three, four, five times, before he pulls out and does it again. Eventually, changing his angle to get in deeper, to make Draco moan louder.
He's surprised at how long he's already lasted, but when Draco starts tugging on his cock, matching Harry's thrusts, Harry can't help himself. They come nearly in unison. Harry grabs the back of Draco's legs and places them on his shoulders, so he can thrust into him a few more times before emptying himself completely.
He all but crashes on top of Draco, their chests sweaty and their foreheads damp. Still, Harry starts kissing Draco again. First his neck, then his jawline, until he reaches Draco's lips, and their mouths are inseparable.
If he never gets to have sex with Draco again, it'll be okay, but he doesn't know if he can ever live without kissing Draco. It's all he needs.
"Will you stay?" Harry says, after he's placed a half-hearted cleansing spell. He knows they both will need a shower anyway.
Draco laughs. "I couldn't go anywhere even if I wanted to." He's still out of breath and Harry likes knowing he's the reason for it.
"Good," Harry says before he wraps his arm around Draco and falls asleep.
*Harry is in the house kitchen, flipping pancakes in nothing but his boxers, and Draco is sitting in Harry's dressing gown at the chair on the kitchen island. Sirius and Remus are gone until the new year, so he might as well use their fully stocked kitchen rather than scrounge for things in his own pathetic one.
After he places a pancake on Draco's plate, he leans in and kisses Draco again. Draco wraps his leg around Harry's waist and pulls him closer. There's a crackling noise, and Harry thinks it's the bacon that's simmering, but of course, he's wrong.
"Don't you have your own flat for these kind of things?" Sirius's voice is stern and it gives Harry a start. Draco's face is just turning red when Harry pulls away from him, and Draco turns away towards the wall, covering his eyes with his hands.
"You were not supposed to be back for another ten days," Harry says in an accusing tone, although he has no right, since Sirius is technically right.
"Erm... Surprise?" Remus says, looking amused and embarrassed at the same time.
Harry looks back at Sirius, who looks angry for just about two more seconds before he starts laughing hysterically. Harry scowls at Sirius, but he looks perplexed now. "Where did he go?"
Harry turns to look where he knows Draco to have sat, finding out that he’s vanished. He couldn't have Apparated, Harry knows. Then he turns to look towards the window and he finds a butterfly sitting on a small vase of tulips. Harry chuckles before he approaches it and the butterfly flies on top of Harry's index finger.
"I think you're being rather silly," Harry says to the butterfly and both Sirius and Remus look at him in confusion. "Come on, now."
Then the butterfly flaps its wings a few times in the air before Draco Transfigures back. "Sorry," he says, shrugging. "Defence mechanism, I suppose."
"Oh," Sirius says and at the same time Remus mutters, "Mr Malfoy."
They haven't been around to know the latest in Harry's life. Of course, Harry didn't get a chance to tell them he'd seen Draco again or that he'd asked him out to dinner. The shock of Draco being there is rather evident on their faces, but Sirius schools his expression quickly while Remus is still gaping.
"Hi," Draco says, looking painfully uncomfortable. At least he's wearing a dressing gown. Harry's only in his boxers.
"Not exactly how I imagined meeting my cousin," Sirius says, and Harry can tell he's trying really hard not to laugh.
"Merlin," Draco mumbles and hides his face behind his hand again.
"Breakfast?" Harry offers cheerfully. "Why don't you two get settled and we'll go and get dressed, so we can have breakfast together."
"Sounds good. Let's go, Sirius," Remus says and starts pulling on Sirius's arm.
"But I-"
"No, Sirius."
They're out of the kitchen and Harry looks at Draco, whose face is burning up, and is looking conflicted. "What's wrong?" Harry asks, worried.
"I don't have any other clothes than that Muggle suit I wore," Draco says wearily.
"You can borrow something of mine," Harry says, feeling relieved. He'd thought it was something more serious. He wraps his arm around Draco's waist and Apparates them to his flat.
"This is so embarrassing," Draco says, sitting on the bed. "This is not how I pictured meeting your family."
"Hey, you're part of the family now too," Harry says, throwing a t-shirt and jeans towards Draco. "This is very normal for us."
"Oh," is all Draco says in return.
Harry stops getting dressed mid-way and looks at Draco. "I mean, you want to be, don't you?" God, how could he just throw something like that at Draco? Again Harry jumped and made assumptions, without asking Draco the question properly.
"Yes. Of course. I just-"
"Draco?"
"Yes."
"Do you want to be my boyfriend?" He asks and before Draco can answer he adds, "I wanted to ask you when we'd got back to Hogwarts after Christmas hols. But, I never got the chance. So I'm asking you now, before it's too late. I told you last night: I love you."
"You mean, you loved me."
"No, Draco," Harry says, shaking his head. "I still love you."
Draco's expression is unreadable for a few moments before he smiles so wide it makes Harry's heart melt. "Yes."
"Yes?"
"I want to be your boyfriend."
"Good," Harry says, pulling Draco in for a kiss.
"...And I still love you, too."
Harry has heard love declarations from many others before, but they never filled him with the warmth and excitement the way they do when coming from Draco. He smiles against Draco's lips. "You know this doesn't mean I'm going to sell my brooms to the Ministry for a discount price..."
"We'll see," Draco says, shrugging. "I'm sure Percy will have thoughts on the matter."Draco Malfoy knows a great many things. Sadly, the only thing he didn't know was how much Harry Potter loved him.
But now he does, and now he'll make sure never to disappear from him again.FIN