Fic: My Own Personal Play Thing

[demi_rabbit]

Title: My Own Personal Play Thing
Rating: M
Genre: Romance and Angst
Pairings or Characters: KyouKao, onesides bouts of TamKyou and HikaKao, and slight TamaHaruHika
Warnings: Yaoi, self destructive behavior, and mentions of public sex.
Summary: In which two children play a very destructive game, without reading the proper rules.
Author's Notes:

Comments

my my, aren't we in an angsty mood....*hearts*

[ceile_chan]

Angst, angst. Personally, I believe it is really the most important of the Fangirl Food Groups (tm). Without angst, the smut can only get *so* hot, ne

Re: my my, aren't we in an angsty mood....*hearts*

[demi_rabbit]

Grah!!! -spazzes over length of comment- 8DD I'm really happy you liked it, and I agree, I wish I had turned this into something more/longer/more developed - the whole 'i'm-just-using-you' theme is quite popular with KyouKao, I've found, and although I originally swore I would never write it, I can see why it's done! The Angsty!sex is always much better~

Hmmm...I took a couple of your pointers (now one of the parenthesis has become it's own paragraph, with little endashes leading down to it, and the other has also been endashed! Still, I'm glad that the few speed bumps in the paragraphing form didn't throw off the angst-o-meter, and thanks for the pointers! xDD Not only does the fic look longer now, but it flows a little better~

I've considered expanding this fiction - originally, it started with this cryptical scene where the dialogue fires back in forth, all about 'who's yours?' with Kyouya not quite getting it, and then when everything clicks (with Kaoru's not-so-subtle 'You can call me Tamaki...'), everything gets uncomfortable

Re: my my, aren't we in an angsty mood....*hearts*

[ceile_chan]

It was a subtle adjustment you made, and it makes a big difference in the mind of the reader. Glad I could give you a little nudge of encouragement. Writing isn't just about the words, but how the words form an experience for the reader. I'm very conscious of that, of how the rhythm of the words resonates in my mind, how I can write so that the story flows and creates a somewhat musical feel for my readers. You do this well already, and little adjustments like these are stylistic tools that can be used to magnify the effect of your words.

Great job!!!

(and yes, I do ignore the Ouran badfic *cringes*)

luvya,

~Nee-san

(hope you enjoyed the chaps I sent heh. I'll pay more attention to that project after the holidays.)

[darkestnight12]

o.O ... ;_;

[demi_rabbit]

^^ is that a good face~? xDD

[darkestnight12]

It's right inbetween. Because this is heartbreaking. ;_;

[demi_rabbit]

-gives heart glue- 8D

Angst... lol

[suddenkiss]

Heya!!! Guess what I'm doing?

... Still haven't got it? Reading your stuff and actually participating in live journal!

Kao-chan, this is awesomeness, I love it! You're are way better a writer than I am any day! *gives many gifts of pastry*

Oh my gosh, I laughed so hard when Kyouya would, "...Prefer for the redhead to just -shut up-...". It sounded like something from the board. (which I'm rescuing)

Anyway, wonderful fic, mon ami! I totally love it!

Re: Angst... lol

[demi_rabbit]

lol - yes to the angst! Dun cha love it! And double yes to the 'shut up', which just seemed to fit! x3

Naw! I love your writings! They are suave, and smooth and quite sexy and I like them.! -takes pastries and gives a cake-

^^ Thank you, amiga~! I'm very happy you liked reading it, probably as much as I enjoyed writing it!