memories of my past sting through my brain every night and i wake up with echoes

( Read more... )

changes grow as larvae inside
feeling big feeling bright
leaves of trees shifting color above my head
dormant emotion harbored life

i need to think about the way the world operates when I am fucked up ( Read more... )

today i finished writing a story. if ever put on film and released for the masses for visual consumption, i really do think it will infect enough for them to change into what they need to become. "the nothing" from the neverending story comes to mind when i think of the mental shift that the moral of my story provides. these thoughts fuel me to ( Read more... )

I seen "the Village" last night. I didn't really like it. It went really slow. I feel alot better latley. I have to try and keep myself occupied so that my mind doesn't wander and want to get high again.

5:50 PM -- I woke up at 3. I drank White Russians last night in order to go to sleep. I went through a pint of Vodka, and fell asleep at 4:30 am. I feel jittery. I hate it.

11:50 PM -- I spent hours playing Manhunt for PS2, killing the people in the game. Then I left my house for the first time today. I drove around aimlessly listening to music and decided I really like the new "Senses Fail" CD. I feel really weird and slaphappy. I smoked my fifth ciggarette today while driving and somehow while turning the wheel ( Read more... )

7:00 PM -- I don't feel that bad. I ate some donuts when I woke up. I have no appettite. My skin feels really hot, and I'm beginning to feel very uncomfortable. Watching "Carlitos Way" has been the most entertaining thing I've done today so far.

2:45 AM -- after an hour and a half of driving around to different houses i know of, i finally got 2 packs ( Read more... )