I don't know everything about being an adult.
I can say that when you start wanting a watch for $19k, I think you earn another notch on the adult belt.
And when you can't nearly afford looking at it, well then you deserve another! Heck, add it to the Amerikan belt too.
A true Amerikan.

i have to find something else. 
livejournal is haunting. 
no matter how much time goes by i cant get the "eye fucking" out of my mind.
its hard to embrace it and accept it.
im too scared of it.
-----------------------

people are always on the look out for something new. 
bright and shiny and new.
new things get old too.
just like old things.

leases & law. 
nieces & nephews. 
doctors & lawyers.
deposits & withdrawls.

and im in the drivers seat. 
and she's in the passenger seat. 
and they're all in the back seats.
control & maintain. 
exist & breathe in.
green light.
go.

and i really think that's how he really feels.

driving a honda after a vw is what i imagine post-pregnancy walking to be like.
maybe you understand this?

as i left, there was a harvest moon shining on the water. 
it created that beam reflection that casts a spell of enchantment every time you look at it. 
its my favorite. 
im thankful for that.

so this is the beginning?

i painted my nails. 
i made juice.
I made two batches of butter.
i finished the kennedys. 
i took a salt bath.
i miss my dad.
i read a 30 page lease. twice.
i talked to my mom. 
i roasted brussel sprouts.
i played d&d.
i worked.
i miss my brother.
i cry when i look at the pictures.
i paid the bills.
i read the emails.
i keep going.

looks like i dont care.
but i always care.
love affair.

it's kinda like that part of your braid that gets loose towards the end and you're not sure if it's gonna make it to the end or not. you start the braid off really tight and strong; your hair is thick & luscious.
then towards the end, your varying hair lengths start effecting the thickness of the braid. your hair goes from smooth & shiny to broken ( Read more... )

Jumping from mattress to couch to fall upon the floor. Too many times the theme of my life has been trying to find a home. I want to wrap myself in the security of a home and shut out the stresses of the work day. 
Currently, I'm temporarily living next to someone who is moving into her new room and home. Just for today and just for right now, I ( Read more... )

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Sometimes I get into these moods.
These moods where I want to have an iMac and drink coffee in a coffee shop and blog about the coffee Im drinking at the coffee shop. I want to have an iPhone and a snazzy wardrobe. I want my home to be decorated and creative and full of plants in creative ways. like all the fucking pictures I look at online in those ( Read more... )