Fic: When You Hold A Flame (Vol 1: Track 6)
Series: When You Hold A Flame
Title: You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away
Pairing,Character(s): Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel, Azimio Adams, Tina Cohen-Chang, Finn Hudson
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1,535
Spoilers: Specific spoilers through 1x20. Through 2x08, AU after that (Series)
Warnings: Homophobic language, swearing, mild sexuality.
Previous Chapters: HERE
A/N: Plot! And dialogue! I has it! Also, I am so so sorry for taking so long to put this up. I went to visit my friend last weekend and barely had time to write. And then this ended up being way longer than usual and actually requiring research. So, yeah. Not an excuse but an explanation.
Summary: What was that thing he wearing, that Dave had already pretended not to notice five times today?
Here I stand, head in hand, turn my face to the wall
If she’s gone I can’t go on, feeling two foot small
Everywhere, people stare, each and every day
I can see them laugh at me, and I hear them say,
“Hey, you’ve got to hide your love away,
Hey, you’ve got to hide your love away.”
It’s almost summer now, and Dave’s walking with Azimio to lunch when a flash of silver catches his eyes up ahead. Fuck…it’s Hummel. What was that thing he wearing, that Dave had already pretended not to notice five times today? For the first time he really noticed the shoes. How the hell did he stand up in those things? Holy shit. He had to be just, like, walking around on the tips of his toes. He was taller than Dave in those things. Shit.
It shouldn’t be so fucking hot but it is.
And of course Az is with him this time. Damn it. Only one way to save face here. He gives Az a look, and they don’t need words. Az is up ahead and catches Hummel first, shoving him back against the lockers, and for good measure Dave pushes the Asian chick into him. Just as they’re making what should be a smooth getaway, though, he hears that voice behind him.
“Excuse me? Were you dropped on your heads?”
Shit. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. Hummel always just took it before. He turns around, and Az does the same. “What was that?” he asks, and immediately regrets it. He could have just kept walking, ignored him, but no. Ignoring Hummel is something that’s not even possible for him anymore.
“I think you heard me. I’m just saying, pick on me, that’s fine, but don’t throw around a girl.”
Azimio beats him to the punch with the obvious retort, and then Dave catches himself staring at the silver fabric stretched tight across Hummel’s chest. He quickly redirects his attention to the Asian chick in the clear bubble dress and wishes he found it nearly as interesting as Hummel’s getup. His attention darts back to Hummel, and he knows it must have been noticed by this time, so he pastes on a sneer. “You dress all freaky, and then you rub it in everybody’s faces. I don’t wanna look at it all day. It’s weird. Makes my eyes tired.” Yeah, man, sounds good. You don’t like that outfit. You don’t want to look at it. Why would you, right?
And it did make his eyes tired, looking at it. Because damned if he didn’t look more intently at that costume than anything else he’d seen that day, or hell, that week.
“It’s called being theatrical. We’re showing off who we are. It’s the same thing you do when you come to school with your football uniforms on. You’re expressing yourself, and we have every right to do the same.”
Dude did not just compare his Gaga getup to Dave’s letterman jacket. He might look the wrong way at Hummel but he does not dress like a fucking fag.
Azimio tells Hummel and Asian chick just what will happen if they keep on “expressing themselves” like that, and even as he smirks on the outside he shudders inside. One more reason he can never let anyone know. Fags get their faces beat in. If Az ever found out, he’d lose his best friend in the world. And probably lose a few teeth to him too. Without another word, they start to walk away when they hear it.
“Yeah, you don’t want to be late for your appointment at Supercuts!”
Hummel again. “Watch your mouth, homo!” Az calls back, and this time, Dave has a comeback ready as he turns around.
“And you know what, Fancy? You don’t need an appointment at Supercuts. They looove walk-ins!”
Yeah. That’d show him. Trying his best not to let his anxiety show, he claps Azimio on the back as they walk away. Yeah, that’s it. Manly clap on the back. Good work, keep it up.
***
At the end of the day they spot Hummel and Asian chick again, coming down the stairs up ahead, still in their Lady Gay-gay clothes. Azimio scowls, and Dave knows the look in those eyes. No. Locker shoving is one thing, but Az looks like he could really go through on that threat for his fist to express itself against Hummel’s chin, and Dave panics. Not Hummel. “Hey, let’s just rough ‘em up a bit,” he says, hoping he sounds more confident than pleading. “There’s, uh, still too many teachers around.” Az looks at him a minute and nods, and when they back the two Gleeks against the wall, he takes the lead. Which is good. Dave’s not sure how he’d react if he actually touched Hummel in those clothes.
The encounter ends with some torn sleeves and rhinestones from Hummel’s insane shoes scattered across the floor, and thankfully some history teacher turns around the corner and Dave pulls Az away before he can make good on his threat. “Come on man, let’s get outta here,” he says, and leaves Hummel and Asian chick to pick up the pieces of their costumes and Dave to head home with a month’s worth of fantasy fodder trapped in his brain.
***
The fucker must be some sort of mas…maso…whatever that thing was where you liked pain. Because the next day he was back, in those same faggy clothes, with those damn rhinestones fucking glued back on. He wanted so badly to ignore it, but he couldn’t of course, couldn’t stop staring. And when Az said they had to teach the homo a proper lesson this time, he couldn’t say no. He had to keep it up. And it’s true, he didn’t want Hummel to keep wearing that stuff. If this became a regular thing, he’d flunk out of school because he couldn’t keep his eyes off him.
They catch him alone after school by the stairs, and they back him up against the wall. There’s a fiery and unnaturally hot defiance in Hummel’s eyes. “Fine,” he says. “You wanna hit me, you wanna beat me up, go ahead. But I swear to you I will never change.” Dave feels his eyes soften a little as he hopes to god that’s Hummel’s choice and not his fate. “I’m proud to be different. It’s the best thing about me.” Dave feels sick when he can’t help the thought that runs through his mind, that Hummel’s right, and he squashes that thought as quickly as he can. “So go ahead. Hit me.”
“I believe I will, or, would you like to go first?” Azimio asks with a glance at him, and Dave feels a rush of fear up his spine. Is he really going to do this, be a part of this? Can he actually hit the object of his affections, no matter how fucked up those affections are? Thankfully he’s spared having to make that decision by a voice from behind.
“You’re not hitting anyone.”
Jesus Christ. Hudson? Azimio says something and then Hudson gives some fucking sentimental speech and Dave doesn’t pay attention to a word of it at first because of the mind-numbing rage that sweeps through his brain. Hummel wanted Hudson, it was obvious to anyone with eyes. Or, at least anyone with eyes who spent as much time with them trained on the homo as Dave did. And if Hudson’s gonna be a fag too, then…shit, no, he was not jealous of the kid in the red shiny dress. He snaps back to reality in time to hear Hudson say he’s not going to let them touch Hummel. Damn. Possessive fucker.
“Oh, really dude?” Dave asks, a little of that anger bleeding into his voice. “Cause, I’m pretty sure we can take both of you.” Az stops him with a hand, and then he sees it. Ten other Gleeks behind Hudson, the girls in more Gay-gay outfits and the guys dressed as…are they KISS? They make a quick exit and Dave does his best to calm down and keep the mask on as they head out to the parking lot.
When they get to the sophomore lot, Azimio turns and looks at him. “Man, you better be careful.”
Dave frowns. He’s not sure what his best friend means by that. “Huh?”
“I say you better be careful, pickin’ on the fag all the time.”
Dave’s eyebrows skew at that. Az has been as much an initiator in this as he has. “You’re not seriously scared of Hudson and the Gleeks. That doesn’t even sound threatening. It sounds like a really terrible name for a band.”
Azimio chuckles. “Nah, man, just you gotta make sure you diversify, you know? Otherwise everybody’s gonna know you’re just pullin’ Hummel’s pigtails.”
For a moment Dave’s heart sinks as he turns quickly to face him. His tongue flicks out across his suddenly-dry lips, but his mouth is dry too so it doesn’t help. Did Az know? He couldn’t know. How could he know? But then he sees Azimio waggle his eyebrows suggestively and he realizes it’s all a joke and he forces a laugh. “Fuck you, man,” he says and shoves Azimio (he hopes it seems playful) and they keep walking out to Az’s car. But his mind is racing. He has to do better at this. He has to come up with a plan to kill this sick infatuation, and soon. Before anyone notices.
Summer vacation can not come quickly enough.
Title: You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away
Pairing,Character(s): Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel, Azimio Adams, Tina Cohen-Chang, Finn Hudson
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1,535
Spoilers: Specific spoilers through 1x20. Through 2x08, AU after that (Series)
Warnings: Homophobic language, swearing, mild sexuality.
Previous Chapters: HERE
A/N: Plot! And dialogue! I has it! Also, I am so so sorry for taking so long to put this up. I went to visit my friend last weekend and barely had time to write. And then this ended up being way longer than usual and actually requiring research. So, yeah. Not an excuse but an explanation.
Summary: What was that thing he wearing, that Dave had already pretended not to notice five times today?
Here I stand, head in hand, turn my face to the wall
If she’s gone I can’t go on, feeling two foot small
Everywhere, people stare, each and every day
I can see them laugh at me, and I hear them say,
“Hey, you’ve got to hide your love away,
Hey, you’ve got to hide your love away.”
It’s almost summer now, and Dave’s walking with Azimio to lunch when a flash of silver catches his eyes up ahead. Fuck…it’s Hummel. What was that thing he wearing, that Dave had already pretended not to notice five times today? For the first time he really noticed the shoes. How the hell did he stand up in those things? Holy shit. He had to be just, like, walking around on the tips of his toes. He was taller than Dave in those things. Shit.
It shouldn’t be so fucking hot but it is.
And of course Az is with him this time. Damn it. Only one way to save face here. He gives Az a look, and they don’t need words. Az is up ahead and catches Hummel first, shoving him back against the lockers, and for good measure Dave pushes the Asian chick into him. Just as they’re making what should be a smooth getaway, though, he hears that voice behind him.
“Excuse me? Were you dropped on your heads?”
Shit. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. Hummel always just took it before. He turns around, and Az does the same. “What was that?” he asks, and immediately regrets it. He could have just kept walking, ignored him, but no. Ignoring Hummel is something that’s not even possible for him anymore.
“I think you heard me. I’m just saying, pick on me, that’s fine, but don’t throw around a girl.”
Azimio beats him to the punch with the obvious retort, and then Dave catches himself staring at the silver fabric stretched tight across Hummel’s chest. He quickly redirects his attention to the Asian chick in the clear bubble dress and wishes he found it nearly as interesting as Hummel’s getup. His attention darts back to Hummel, and he knows it must have been noticed by this time, so he pastes on a sneer. “You dress all freaky, and then you rub it in everybody’s faces. I don’t wanna look at it all day. It’s weird. Makes my eyes tired.” Yeah, man, sounds good. You don’t like that outfit. You don’t want to look at it. Why would you, right?
And it did make his eyes tired, looking at it. Because damned if he didn’t look more intently at that costume than anything else he’d seen that day, or hell, that week.
“It’s called being theatrical. We’re showing off who we are. It’s the same thing you do when you come to school with your football uniforms on. You’re expressing yourself, and we have every right to do the same.”
Dude did not just compare his Gaga getup to Dave’s letterman jacket. He might look the wrong way at Hummel but he does not dress like a fucking fag.
Azimio tells Hummel and Asian chick just what will happen if they keep on “expressing themselves” like that, and even as he smirks on the outside he shudders inside. One more reason he can never let anyone know. Fags get their faces beat in. If Az ever found out, he’d lose his best friend in the world. And probably lose a few teeth to him too. Without another word, they start to walk away when they hear it.
“Yeah, you don’t want to be late for your appointment at Supercuts!”
Hummel again. “Watch your mouth, homo!” Az calls back, and this time, Dave has a comeback ready as he turns around.
“And you know what, Fancy? You don’t need an appointment at Supercuts. They looove walk-ins!”
Yeah. That’d show him. Trying his best not to let his anxiety show, he claps Azimio on the back as they walk away. Yeah, that’s it. Manly clap on the back. Good work, keep it up.
***
At the end of the day they spot Hummel and Asian chick again, coming down the stairs up ahead, still in their Lady Gay-gay clothes. Azimio scowls, and Dave knows the look in those eyes. No. Locker shoving is one thing, but Az looks like he could really go through on that threat for his fist to express itself against Hummel’s chin, and Dave panics. Not Hummel. “Hey, let’s just rough ‘em up a bit,” he says, hoping he sounds more confident than pleading. “There’s, uh, still too many teachers around.” Az looks at him a minute and nods, and when they back the two Gleeks against the wall, he takes the lead. Which is good. Dave’s not sure how he’d react if he actually touched Hummel in those clothes.
The encounter ends with some torn sleeves and rhinestones from Hummel’s insane shoes scattered across the floor, and thankfully some history teacher turns around the corner and Dave pulls Az away before he can make good on his threat. “Come on man, let’s get outta here,” he says, and leaves Hummel and Asian chick to pick up the pieces of their costumes and Dave to head home with a month’s worth of fantasy fodder trapped in his brain.
***
The fucker must be some sort of mas…maso…whatever that thing was where you liked pain. Because the next day he was back, in those same faggy clothes, with those damn rhinestones fucking glued back on. He wanted so badly to ignore it, but he couldn’t of course, couldn’t stop staring. And when Az said they had to teach the homo a proper lesson this time, he couldn’t say no. He had to keep it up. And it’s true, he didn’t want Hummel to keep wearing that stuff. If this became a regular thing, he’d flunk out of school because he couldn’t keep his eyes off him.
They catch him alone after school by the stairs, and they back him up against the wall. There’s a fiery and unnaturally hot defiance in Hummel’s eyes. “Fine,” he says. “You wanna hit me, you wanna beat me up, go ahead. But I swear to you I will never change.” Dave feels his eyes soften a little as he hopes to god that’s Hummel’s choice and not his fate. “I’m proud to be different. It’s the best thing about me.” Dave feels sick when he can’t help the thought that runs through his mind, that Hummel’s right, and he squashes that thought as quickly as he can. “So go ahead. Hit me.”
“I believe I will, or, would you like to go first?” Azimio asks with a glance at him, and Dave feels a rush of fear up his spine. Is he really going to do this, be a part of this? Can he actually hit the object of his affections, no matter how fucked up those affections are? Thankfully he’s spared having to make that decision by a voice from behind.
“You’re not hitting anyone.”
Jesus Christ. Hudson? Azimio says something and then Hudson gives some fucking sentimental speech and Dave doesn’t pay attention to a word of it at first because of the mind-numbing rage that sweeps through his brain. Hummel wanted Hudson, it was obvious to anyone with eyes. Or, at least anyone with eyes who spent as much time with them trained on the homo as Dave did. And if Hudson’s gonna be a fag too, then…shit, no, he was not jealous of the kid in the red shiny dress. He snaps back to reality in time to hear Hudson say he’s not going to let them touch Hummel. Damn. Possessive fucker.
“Oh, really dude?” Dave asks, a little of that anger bleeding into his voice. “Cause, I’m pretty sure we can take both of you.” Az stops him with a hand, and then he sees it. Ten other Gleeks behind Hudson, the girls in more Gay-gay outfits and the guys dressed as…are they KISS? They make a quick exit and Dave does his best to calm down and keep the mask on as they head out to the parking lot.
When they get to the sophomore lot, Azimio turns and looks at him. “Man, you better be careful.”
Dave frowns. He’s not sure what his best friend means by that. “Huh?”
“I say you better be careful, pickin’ on the fag all the time.”
Dave’s eyebrows skew at that. Az has been as much an initiator in this as he has. “You’re not seriously scared of Hudson and the Gleeks. That doesn’t even sound threatening. It sounds like a really terrible name for a band.”
Azimio chuckles. “Nah, man, just you gotta make sure you diversify, you know? Otherwise everybody’s gonna know you’re just pullin’ Hummel’s pigtails.”
For a moment Dave’s heart sinks as he turns quickly to face him. His tongue flicks out across his suddenly-dry lips, but his mouth is dry too so it doesn’t help. Did Az know? He couldn’t know. How could he know? But then he sees Azimio waggle his eyebrows suggestively and he realizes it’s all a joke and he forces a laugh. “Fuck you, man,” he says and shoves Azimio (he hopes it seems playful) and they keep walking out to Az’s car. But his mind is racing. He has to do better at this. He has to come up with a plan to kill this sick infatuation, and soon. Before anyone notices.
Summer vacation can not come quickly enough.