Comments | datinandrelatin: Burned, and burned bad

hakaisha in datinandrelatin

Burned, and burned bad

Jan 02, 2008 23:15

Long.

So...an update on THIS (nuances might not be comprehensible without reading prior entry, although general gist should be understandable), and needing advice.

( Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater )

cheating, being lead on, update

Comments 4

porcelain_ocean January 3 2008, 21:11:08 UTC

my 2 cents, for what they're worth ( ... )

we3zer January 3 2008, 21:47:34 UTC

i think the guy may have just been using u as an "in the meantime" hook up and attempting to get laid while he and his gf were onthe fritz. plus, it seems that he and his gf are spending more time together recently and in my experience, a boy will always go back to the gf... it's just comfortable for them or something. anyway, you should FORGET him! Cleanse yourself of him, cut your hair, change your clothes, reorganize your room, concentrate on school, do stuff to make your life "appear" to be moving forward and the rest will follow. I wouldn't quit your job until you find another one and you're sure you can still make money. Treat him with civility at work but don't go out of your way to make conversation - he'll get the hint and it will hurt him, even if he doesn't show it. I would keep the presents! lol. i'd probably put them deep in the back of my closet somewhere so i wouldn't have to look at them for a while, but Hey, it was his money and his loss so you get to reap the spoils of war and get some nice collector's items ( ... )

tacky_tramp January 4 2008, 02:00:49 UTC

Oh geez, I would quit in a heartbeat.

Regarding forgiving him or not, that's really up to you. He was kind of a scumbag, but we all are at times. I'd recommend you not worry about forgiving him or not -- just work on letting go of your anger.

And if the only reason you want to give back the gifts is to hurt him, don't. It's not good for your karma. Sell them on eBay.

roshy January 5 2008, 02:57:12 UTC

1) Quit. You're not dealing with ordinary job pressures here, and you don't seem to have any constructive way to deal with it, because the stress is getting to you. It's interfering with your grades.

2) He's an idiot. You have wasted entirely too much time worrying over him, his actions, and what they mean.
"I literally failed two classes, bombed three others, and flunked out of my honours degree for this" is NOT a proportional reaction. You've let his wishy-washiness rule your life. And yeah, he's a manipulative jerk, but you let him manipulate you. By continuing to talk to him and entertain him, you were sending the implicit message that it was OK to keep in contact and for him to keep doing what he was doing. You were so clear in setting physical boundaries for him, and that's a big deal, so congratulations. You were not so clear in setting emotional boundaries for him or yourself.

3) Give them back. They're only going to be reminders of a sad and sorry time in your life.