[Fic] The Air I Breathe - 1/7
Title: The Air I Breathe
Author: Coley Merrin
Rating: R overall
Pairings: Siwon/Hankyung
Also Featuring: Zhou Mi/Kyuhyun
Genre: AU, fantasy, angst, romance
Summary: Caught between two worlds, Siwon must find a way to save not only himself, but the jaguar spirit whose life hangs in the balance.
Once more, this is a sequel to The Life I Live, a QMi story.
***
Part One * Part Two
***
He dreamed of wind. It tore at his clothes as he stood, poised at the edge of a canyon. The cut was deep and narrow, colored red and brown and orange, a living earth that the molecules of air buffeted and sprang from, moving it piece by tiny piece. If he stood, just like this, would it move him? Streams and currents taking him place to place, searching for something... Something.
Or would it break him...
The earth seemed to tremble beneath him, and he breathed, suddenly knowing he wasn’t alone. A shadow, he saw first, and thought that was all it was, but it wasn’t... It solidified beside him, the shadow darkening into individual hairs, a dark hide marked with even darker markings. Rosettes, they were called, his mind supplied as the creature raised its head. A jaguar, a black one, staring at him with golden feline eyes. He watched the cat’s whiskers tremble, and the connection was broken as it stepped forward, paws right at the edge of the canyon’s lip, staring at where the wind danced. It was as though they both could see it.
“What’s down there?” he asked, and did not feel silly to have spoken aloud. The jaguar’s ears flickered as though it were listening, and it snarled softly down, toward a place he could not see. He reached to touch, fingers on slick fur, and did not fear the danger.
With his hand on the cat’s shoulder, he felt it coil to spring, and felt his body respond in kind. When they leaped into the void, they leaped together.
***
Siwon’s friends loved him, he knew they did. Walking into the dance club “Jungle” on his birthday had not been something he’d been anticipating.
Surprise! Yes, he was surprised.
An hour, no more, someone promised. Get out, meet people! You’re so sheltered.
Siwon sighed and sipped his beer. Meet people. People who were writhing around on the dance floor. People drinking, making out in dark corners.
Who was he going to meet here?
An unfamiliar man shoved a coat into his hand, and Siwon stared after him as he disappeared into the crowd. That...had been unexpected.
He caught brief glimpses of the tall man and his partner, shamelessly making out with each other while dancing. He averted his eyes, giving them privacy, as though privacy really mattered in the middle of a club. The movement caught his eye as they came out, into the lighter area where Siwon had edged, hand in hand.
They made small talk, he and the two men. It was nice to see a couple so clearly into each other. The vicious stab of envy was tamped down as they teased each other. Who could he meet, that he could...
His parents suggested girls, and his friends suggested everyone else, and he just... He didn’t...
His thoughts left him as his fingers closed over the small wooden animal offered to him on the man’s hand.
A gift for holding his coat, the man said. A carving of a black jaguar.
Siwon acknowledged that with a “No, really, it’s all right,” but in his mind he was in the canyon again, the wind pushing up his hair, his clothes, the jaguar hot against his leg.
He’d dreamed of this.
The wood in his hand was scored, as though it had been driven into by something harsh. As though sand had scoured it. Perhaps even driven by wind. It gave the little painted figure the appearance of rosettes.
It was heated in his pocket the whole of the night, after he and the men had parted, through dinner with his friends and boisterous singing.
He stumbled into his apartment, mostly sober thankfully, his hand on the little figure. It hadn’t been suicide in his dream, jumping off that cliff edge with the jaguar, he reasoned. There had been something down there waiting for them, just beyond that wind. He knew it. Believed it.
It was right there, within his grasp...
He kept the jaguar tucked in his palm as he faded into sleep.
***
Siwon did not wake easily, out of balance as he careened into an oddly shaped wall. He nearly fell with a hiss, pushing himself upright in the dimness. It smelled like...tree sap. And he came to the realization that it was because he had fallen into the inside of a tree. What was it with him and weird dreams? He jumped off a cliff, woke up in a tree... What next? An ocean?
The roar of a large cat had him jumping, knocking his head painfully on a protruding knot. He edged toward the brighter exit, staring outside in awe.
Not just a tree, but a forest. Green, and alive. It all but invited him to breathe it in, taste the living air that changed and moved.
It was then he saw the cat.
The jaguar.
It was gorgeous, dark fur rippling in the early sunlight as it moved. Its teeth were bared, but not at Siwon.
No, at the bird. It was huge, fully half as tall as Siwon, thick, long wicked beak. Black, rough-edged feathers. And a tail, twice as long as it was, scaly and dancing with the bird’s movement. Every bit a weapon as that heavy beak was. The jaguar roared again, and the bird flinched, lashing out with a call that sent chills up Siwon’s spine. The two predators were focused on each other, but he could not help his hand curling around a thick stick. Just in case. Just in case.
The cat coiled, sprang, and was knocked down.
The bird took advantage, the long tail sliding sinuously, tightly, around the cat’s neck.
No! Siwon shouted in his mind, holding his breath. Get away, claw it or...
The jaguar thrashed, body curling as it worked against the choking tail. It lashed out with all four paws, weakening as it flopped from one side to the other.
What could Siwon do...with a stick? The bird could skewer in him in less time than it took to think. But to watch that majestic creature die...
The bird’s tail loosened slightly, pecking at the jaguar’s head, and then at it’s body.
When the bird’s beak came away, it held a heavy, dark pelt in its beak. And the slick tail was no longer wrapped around the neck of a cat, but of...
A man?
Siwon blinked, clearing his eyes as the bird drew the man upright. He was barely dressed, hair dark, hands grasping at the thick tail. And he was shouting hoarsely.
The bird almost seem to laugh, and began to shake the man viciously.
Siwon had felt anger, sorrow, for the jaguar. But how... How could he allow this man to die?
Gripping the stick in his hands, he began to run.
“Get out of here!” he shouted, catching the bird off guard, the stick striking it beneath its eye.
It reared back, wings flaring as it screamed in surprise. Siwon kept swinging, beating at it’s beak, its breast, its wings. Anything he could hit, he did.
The bird leaped back, flapping halfway into the air, the man dropping limp, face down into the dirt. The bird crowed in something like triumph, hissing at Siwon before turning...and flying away.
Siwon dove for the man, the stick dropped beside him, as he turned the unconscious form. The face was dirty, bloody. And not breathing. He’d taken CPR. Once. Sort of. Siwon positioned the slender neck, parted the slack mouth, and lowered his head to exhale air into the man’s lungs.
He was halfway into the breath, when the man choked, pushing at Siwon’s face and turning half onto his side. Gagging and breathing, all at once. Siwon petted his side, not knowing what else to do. He waited until the man’s breathing stabilized, and held his breath until the man’s eyes lifted to his. They were soft and brown, and so confused, taking in Siwon’s dark pajamas and the hand that was still touching him.
“The pelt,” the man said, struggling upright.
“Oh, this,” Siwon said, reaching and drawing the dark fur closer.
As the man’s hand closed around it, drawing the heavy pelt to his chest, he gave Siwon a rather odd look.
“Do you understand me?”
Siwon frowned. “Yes? I do understand you.”
“You touched...” the man pressed his fingers to his lips. “Oh no. No, no.”
Siwon licked his lips as the man stood, so much lithe grace in that movement... This man was unlike anyone he’d ever seen. He wanted to touch that stomach, and see...
“Follow me,” the man ordered.
***
Siwon stumbled over stones and branches, keeping up with the man’s steady pace. Every so often the dark head would turn, checking his progress. They didn’t walk far, the sound of running water greeting them as they emerged onto a river bank.
They were met by two others.
Siwon was not a coward, by usual standards, but as he stared at the unfamiliar men, he realized that he could not clearly see their faces. He edged closer to the man, the jaguar. The three half dressed men were having a conversation of some sort, in a language Siwon could not identify. Siwon stared between the man beside him and the others, comparing. The man, with his regal nose, the soft mouth and subtle chin. His cheekbones and brown eyes. The drawn brows. The others, their faces blurred, eyes sort of...strangely bright, little white lights through a haze. It was creepy, and bizarre.
The man looked close to despair as he seemed to nearly be begging, and Siwon reached for him, incapable of not giving comfort to someone beside him. The arm beneath Siwon’s hand jerked, the dark eyes meeting his in shock.
“Sorry,” Siwon said. “I... You looked upset.”
“Can you...” The man licked his lips. “Can you see the others?”
“No,” Siwon said with a shake of his head. “No. They are blurred to me. I don’t... Do you know why?”
“I do. Because you were not meant for them... How did you come here, do you know?”
“I dreamed?” Siwon mused. “The jaguar... I was given a wooden one, and...”
“A wooden jaguar?”
“Yes. From a man named Zhou Mi...”
How many hours ago had that been? It seemed like a lifetime ago.
“Zhou Mi.” The man’s skin paled noticeably and the other men sent up a sort of wail at the name. What came out next was a breathy whisper, “Then he sent you for me...”
“Sent me? I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”
“I am Han Geng,” the same told him. “And no, this is no dream. You have come to save me.”
“I tried to earlier,” Siwon said earnestly.
Han Geng laughed, the sound washing over Siwon’s skin. “Yes, you did. Yes. We have much to do.” He looked to where the others had stood and Siwon was startled to find they were no longer there. “They won’t help us. You touched your mouth to mine, before the ritual. That’s why you can understand me. I... I don’t know if I can do this myself, but we have to try...”
“Can I help?” Siwon offered. He wanted the look of dissatisfaction on Han Geng’s face to fade. If he could help... “My name is Siwon, by the way.”
“Siwon,” Han Geng repeated. “Yes. You can help.”
***
Han Geng ordered him to wash, standing nearby to observe as he stripped and waded into the cool water. He scrubbed at his skin with the soft sand, Han Geng pointing out places he had missed, and Siwon scrubbed harder not wanting Han Geng to have to wade closer and do it himself. Even if the thought was somewhat appealing.
Han Geng helped him to dress in the same sort of cloth around his waist, and thought it did not cover much, he felt comfortable in it. More than that, he felt comfortable in the company he was with. Han Geng did not talk much, but there was confidence in his as he moved, holding the heavy jaguar pelt close against himself. This time, Han Geng gripped two of his fingers as they wound back through the steadily heating, brightening forest. He was beginning to sweat, just a bit.
“These berries,” Han Geng said, appearing beside him, after several minutes of him sitting in the clearing where the great tree was. “Would you squeeze them into the bowl?”
The bowl was finely, if inexpertly crafted, and Siwon agreed, carefully squeezing the pale, nearly clear juice into the cup, fishing out bits of skin. Han Geng had disappeared again, returning to set a second cup, full of pulpy fruit juice beside the other one. Siwon chanced to look up, and froze.
Dark lines had been drawn along Han Geng’s lashes, making his eyes seem shockingly light brown beside the black. Faint lines, circles, were on his arms, his sides... Emulating the jaguar, Siwon realized. And it was fascinating. Fascinating that he couldn’t tear his eyes from Han Geng’s face.
Han Geng breathed, picking up the cup of berry juice that Siwon had prepared, drawing lines of sweet liquid on Siwon’s brow and lips, pressing his moist hand to Siwon’s heart.
Drawing his name across Siwon’s stomach.
“Han Geng,” Han Geng said, underlining his name. “I am Han Geng.”
Siwon swallowed, his flesh on fire.
“Please, do the same for me,” Han Geng said, pressing the cup into Siwon’s hand.
Siwon did, Han Geng’s skin heated against his fingers.
“Siwon,” he said, when he had finished his name. “I am Siwon.”
“Drink for me,” Han Geng said, and offered him the cup of thicker, pinkish juice. “Drink all of it. For you, I can provide.”
Siwon drank, finishing it quickly, licking the remnants from his fingers as Han Geng took the cup and moved to him.
“To learn you, your skin, to take you into me...”
Siwon froze as Han Geng sidled against him, their skin sliding together, the cloth at Siwon’s waist falling at Han Geng’s insisting hands. If he breathed too deep, he could smell the skin in front of him, Han Geng’s chest brushing his as they breathed.
He moaned, low, as Han Geng’s hands ghosted his skin. Every place he had left, his scalp, his face, tingled. Han Geng’s lashes were low, hiding his eyes in the black edging.
The touch was more of a caress, crossing his chest, and pausing against his stomach. Han Geng’s eyes rose, meeting his as his hands took a second journey along Siwon’s abdomen. He could see Han Geng’s lips tremble, curve, and he continued, along Siwon’s legs, arms, back... Every inch of skin touched and claimed. Han Geng leaned against his back, breathing against the side of his neck.
“Han Geng...”
“Siwon... Please...”
He wanted Siwon to touch, touch all of him, just as he had done for Siwon. Their eyes met, briefly, the beautiful brown eyes closing as Siwon traced his hands over his face.
Han Geng’s stomach was firm, but almost...pretty. Graceful, like the rest of him. It took all of Siwon’s willpower not to rest his face against it, running his hands along the backs of Han Geng’s thighs. And the cloth that had been covering Han Geng, beside him. He didn’t really question what he was doing, or why. Only that he was compelled to it. Han Geng’s plea was ringing in him. To take you into me, Han Geng had said. Siwon pressed his nose to the nape of Han Geng’s neck, and just breathed, feeling that so intimately. Taking Han Geng into him. This man whose life he had saved, who was now... Thanking him, perhaps?
Han Geng was trembling as Siwon wrapped his arms around him.
“Are you all right?” Siwon asked, and pushed aside the urges of his body, the attraction he felt for the man in front of him. It wasn’t the makeup, the dark markings. It wasn’t the naked skin, though that was all facets of it. It was Han Geng’s eyes, the sadness and longing in them, the quiet joy as Siwon touched him.
“I never thought...” Han Geng turned. “I finally understand why someone would want this. Why someone would...”
He touched Siwon’s mouth with gentle fingers, and Siwon’s hands tightened on Han Geng’s lower back. The pretty mouth parted, begging in a different way.
Their lips brushed, pressing, and Han Geng sighed his name. It was unlike any kiss he had ever had, this kiss with Han Geng, and it did terrible things to him. Any barriers he had expected in Han Geng’s mouth, he found none. Only a sweet hesitancy that seemed to warm at Siwon’s touch. It made him want to pull Han Geng’s hips closer, to bite the slender neck, feel Han Geng’s arms tight around him, and...
Han Geng jerked back, as though he had heard Siwon’s thoughts, as though they disgusted him. There was anger in his eyes. And fear.
“The bird,” Han Geng gasped.
Siwon’s shoulder hit the ground hard as they dove, rolling as the bird swooped low over them. It’s screeching cry scoured them as much as the rush of leaves did.
Where could they go, to escape...
The tree.
“To the tree!” Siwon shouted, standing with Han Geng.
“We can’t... You can’t before we... Siwon!”
They were running before Siwon could process Han Geng’s words.
The scream of the death bird was right behind him, and when he saw the opening of the tree, he headed for it, the speed of his body forcing Han Geng ahead of him, into the cool, into the dark.
“N-no!” Han Geng shouted at him, but Siwon didn’t know why. Another avian scream, and he had forced them into the corner, all his instincts, his feelings, shouting that the only option he had was to cover Han Geng, to protect him, with his own body if need be. You saved his life, he’s yours now. He touched you. He trusts you. He... Han Geng’s back was pressed to the smooth inner curve of the tree, and he jerked against Siwon’s body, eyes wide as he stared over Siwon’s shoulder.
A hiss, the click of a beak.
Pressing Han Geng’s head down, he mouthed nonsense against the long neck. If they were going to die, at least they would be together.
Together. Together...
The fine-grained wood was almost warm beneath his pressing hand, and he thought, All I want is to save us...
He cried out as his shoulder burned, the bird’s scream echoing in the hollows.
He heard Han Geng shout his name.
And remembered nothing after.
***
Siwon came to consciousness in a tangle of limbs, Han Geng heavy on him, and they rolled... Falling.
He grunted, groaned, as he fell with a thud onto the dirt-brown carpet of his bedroom, and Han Geng with him... Well, that wasn’t quite true. He landed on Han Geng more than the carpet.
Wait. His bedroom? If they were in his bedroom, if Han Geng was in his bedroom... Then it really hadn’t been a dream. The man who could change into a jaguar was nearly squashed beneath him. He was fairly certain there was no place on this planet that men could don the skin of an animal and turn into it. Which meant... Had the little wooden jaguar taken him that far from home? Was it even possible?
But he had other concerns right at first.
“We’re on Earth. In Korea!” Siwon said, startled, pushing up onto his elbows. “In my apartment!”
“Apartment?” Han Geng asked, still catching his breath from Siwon’s weight on him.
“The place I live,” Siwon explained, staring fondly down at Han Geng. Han Geng... In his apartment. Who would have imagined... All that tawny skin... He swallowed, shaking his head. “So. Welcome to Earth?”
Han Geng smiled, accepting his hand to help him sit up.
“You don’t live in a tree, then,” Han Geng said, and Siwon laughed at his humor. Well. He hoped it was humor.
Han Geng touched the rug beneath them, the bedspread, staring at the window, the mirror, the light fixture. How foreign it all must seem after the forest.
Siwon helped Han Geng to stand, and let his hand linger a long moment on Han Geng’s, uncomfortably conscious of the fact that they were both still naked. He couldn’t just...touch like this. It wasn’t his right.
“I need a shower,” Siwon said, stepping back toward the bathroom and withdrawing his hand. “Why don’t...”
Han Geng dropped like a stone, eyes impossibly wide as he clutched, almost clawed, at his throat. There was no wheezing, only a desperate struggle. A struggle Siwon registered after several heart-racing moments. Han Geng just couldn’t breathe. He didn’t make any noise as Siwon grabbed him, ready to... Do what? Call for an ambulance, breathe for him... As soon as Siwon’s hands closed over his, Han Geng took in a noisy breath, then two, sucking in oxygen as though it was going to disappear.
“What happened?” Siwon exclaimed, running his hands gently over Han Geng’s shoulders.
“I don’t know... I don’t know,” Han Geng said hoarsely. “You left and I couldn’t... I just couldn’t breathe. Like there was some kind of block inside me.”
“I’m not going to leave you,” Siwon assured him, voice soft. If it had been panic... They would deal with it. He was so far from home. “I’ll get you a drink of water, okay? Come with me.”
Their fingers were lightly tangled as they walked into the kitchen, Han Geng staying close. Siwon smiled at him reassuringly, letting go of Han Geng’s hand to reach for a glass.
Han Geng’s head thumped hollowly against the cupboard door, falling, and reaching before Siwon could even turn. Mouth seeking for something that wasn’t coming...
Once again, he gasped, taking in air as Siwon gathered him close. Han Geng’s body trembled against him, breathing heavily against Siwon’s shoulder. “I can’t... I can’t breathe if you’re not touching me,” he shuddered out.
Siwon clutched him a little tighter, having arrived at the same conclusion.
***
How many Zhou Mis could there be in Seoul? Siwon wondered as he dressed Han Geng. Han Geng’s hands were on his face as Siwon did buttons up their shirts, and tightened the belt and pants around Han Geng’s slender waist. Even dressed, there was a certain wildness to him. He watched Han Geng wiggle his toes inside of his socks as he listened to the phone ring. Their hands were tightly clasped.
“Hello?”
“Zhou Mi?” Siwon demanded.
“Er... No. Just a second.”
The phone was passed, and Zhou Mi had barely gotten out a greeting, when Siwon barged ahead. “This is Siwon, from the club. The jaguar carving. I need to talk to you.”
“Oh!” Zhou Mi said. “You’re...back?”
It was said as though Zhou Mi had known exactly where he had been. What was it Kyuhyun had said? That Zhou Mi had been a real tiger? He just bet Zhou Mi had been. But Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun hadn’t been joined at the hip... Zhou Mi could breathe on his own. He had to find out why.
“Can we come over?”
Instructions were given, and Siwon got a reluctant Han Geng into shoes.
Getting into the car while still joined at the hand had been an interesting feat. Luckily Han Geng was very limber.
Han Geng peered anxiously up at the building. “I got a bad feeling up there, Siwon,” he said softly.
“We’ll fix this,” Siwon said, and squeezed his hand. Getting a bad feeling was no wonder, if he couldn’t breathe...
***
In the apartment next to Siwon’s, a man stretched, waking. Where his thoughts would have normally been filled with stumbling into the bathroom, chugging some orange juice, over those desires a black cloud hung, obscuring them. If he could have described his thoughts, he would have said they were filled with death. But could not... Something else had taken over.
He lifted one arm, then the other, and grinned in pleasure.
Maybe this human did not have a beak or a tail, but it could be very useful indeed...
***
Author: Coley Merrin
Rating: R overall
Pairings: Siwon/Hankyung
Also Featuring: Zhou Mi/Kyuhyun
Genre: AU, fantasy, angst, romance
Summary: Caught between two worlds, Siwon must find a way to save not only himself, but the jaguar spirit whose life hangs in the balance.
Once more, this is a sequel to The Life I Live, a QMi story.
***
Part One * Part Two
***
He dreamed of wind. It tore at his clothes as he stood, poised at the edge of a canyon. The cut was deep and narrow, colored red and brown and orange, a living earth that the molecules of air buffeted and sprang from, moving it piece by tiny piece. If he stood, just like this, would it move him? Streams and currents taking him place to place, searching for something... Something.
Or would it break him...
The earth seemed to tremble beneath him, and he breathed, suddenly knowing he wasn’t alone. A shadow, he saw first, and thought that was all it was, but it wasn’t... It solidified beside him, the shadow darkening into individual hairs, a dark hide marked with even darker markings. Rosettes, they were called, his mind supplied as the creature raised its head. A jaguar, a black one, staring at him with golden feline eyes. He watched the cat’s whiskers tremble, and the connection was broken as it stepped forward, paws right at the edge of the canyon’s lip, staring at where the wind danced. It was as though they both could see it.
“What’s down there?” he asked, and did not feel silly to have spoken aloud. The jaguar’s ears flickered as though it were listening, and it snarled softly down, toward a place he could not see. He reached to touch, fingers on slick fur, and did not fear the danger.
With his hand on the cat’s shoulder, he felt it coil to spring, and felt his body respond in kind. When they leaped into the void, they leaped together.
***
Siwon’s friends loved him, he knew they did. Walking into the dance club “Jungle” on his birthday had not been something he’d been anticipating.
Surprise! Yes, he was surprised.
An hour, no more, someone promised. Get out, meet people! You’re so sheltered.
Siwon sighed and sipped his beer. Meet people. People who were writhing around on the dance floor. People drinking, making out in dark corners.
Who was he going to meet here?
An unfamiliar man shoved a coat into his hand, and Siwon stared after him as he disappeared into the crowd. That...had been unexpected.
He caught brief glimpses of the tall man and his partner, shamelessly making out with each other while dancing. He averted his eyes, giving them privacy, as though privacy really mattered in the middle of a club. The movement caught his eye as they came out, into the lighter area where Siwon had edged, hand in hand.
They made small talk, he and the two men. It was nice to see a couple so clearly into each other. The vicious stab of envy was tamped down as they teased each other. Who could he meet, that he could...
His parents suggested girls, and his friends suggested everyone else, and he just... He didn’t...
His thoughts left him as his fingers closed over the small wooden animal offered to him on the man’s hand.
A gift for holding his coat, the man said. A carving of a black jaguar.
Siwon acknowledged that with a “No, really, it’s all right,” but in his mind he was in the canyon again, the wind pushing up his hair, his clothes, the jaguar hot against his leg.
He’d dreamed of this.
The wood in his hand was scored, as though it had been driven into by something harsh. As though sand had scoured it. Perhaps even driven by wind. It gave the little painted figure the appearance of rosettes.
It was heated in his pocket the whole of the night, after he and the men had parted, through dinner with his friends and boisterous singing.
He stumbled into his apartment, mostly sober thankfully, his hand on the little figure. It hadn’t been suicide in his dream, jumping off that cliff edge with the jaguar, he reasoned. There had been something down there waiting for them, just beyond that wind. He knew it. Believed it.
It was right there, within his grasp...
He kept the jaguar tucked in his palm as he faded into sleep.
***
Siwon did not wake easily, out of balance as he careened into an oddly shaped wall. He nearly fell with a hiss, pushing himself upright in the dimness. It smelled like...tree sap. And he came to the realization that it was because he had fallen into the inside of a tree. What was it with him and weird dreams? He jumped off a cliff, woke up in a tree... What next? An ocean?
The roar of a large cat had him jumping, knocking his head painfully on a protruding knot. He edged toward the brighter exit, staring outside in awe.
Not just a tree, but a forest. Green, and alive. It all but invited him to breathe it in, taste the living air that changed and moved.
It was then he saw the cat.
The jaguar.
It was gorgeous, dark fur rippling in the early sunlight as it moved. Its teeth were bared, but not at Siwon.
No, at the bird. It was huge, fully half as tall as Siwon, thick, long wicked beak. Black, rough-edged feathers. And a tail, twice as long as it was, scaly and dancing with the bird’s movement. Every bit a weapon as that heavy beak was. The jaguar roared again, and the bird flinched, lashing out with a call that sent chills up Siwon’s spine. The two predators were focused on each other, but he could not help his hand curling around a thick stick. Just in case. Just in case.
The cat coiled, sprang, and was knocked down.
The bird took advantage, the long tail sliding sinuously, tightly, around the cat’s neck.
No! Siwon shouted in his mind, holding his breath. Get away, claw it or...
The jaguar thrashed, body curling as it worked against the choking tail. It lashed out with all four paws, weakening as it flopped from one side to the other.
What could Siwon do...with a stick? The bird could skewer in him in less time than it took to think. But to watch that majestic creature die...
The bird’s tail loosened slightly, pecking at the jaguar’s head, and then at it’s body.
When the bird’s beak came away, it held a heavy, dark pelt in its beak. And the slick tail was no longer wrapped around the neck of a cat, but of...
A man?
Siwon blinked, clearing his eyes as the bird drew the man upright. He was barely dressed, hair dark, hands grasping at the thick tail. And he was shouting hoarsely.
The bird almost seem to laugh, and began to shake the man viciously.
Siwon had felt anger, sorrow, for the jaguar. But how... How could he allow this man to die?
Gripping the stick in his hands, he began to run.
“Get out of here!” he shouted, catching the bird off guard, the stick striking it beneath its eye.
It reared back, wings flaring as it screamed in surprise. Siwon kept swinging, beating at it’s beak, its breast, its wings. Anything he could hit, he did.
The bird leaped back, flapping halfway into the air, the man dropping limp, face down into the dirt. The bird crowed in something like triumph, hissing at Siwon before turning...and flying away.
Siwon dove for the man, the stick dropped beside him, as he turned the unconscious form. The face was dirty, bloody. And not breathing. He’d taken CPR. Once. Sort of. Siwon positioned the slender neck, parted the slack mouth, and lowered his head to exhale air into the man’s lungs.
He was halfway into the breath, when the man choked, pushing at Siwon’s face and turning half onto his side. Gagging and breathing, all at once. Siwon petted his side, not knowing what else to do. He waited until the man’s breathing stabilized, and held his breath until the man’s eyes lifted to his. They were soft and brown, and so confused, taking in Siwon’s dark pajamas and the hand that was still touching him.
“The pelt,” the man said, struggling upright.
“Oh, this,” Siwon said, reaching and drawing the dark fur closer.
As the man’s hand closed around it, drawing the heavy pelt to his chest, he gave Siwon a rather odd look.
“Do you understand me?”
Siwon frowned. “Yes? I do understand you.”
“You touched...” the man pressed his fingers to his lips. “Oh no. No, no.”
Siwon licked his lips as the man stood, so much lithe grace in that movement... This man was unlike anyone he’d ever seen. He wanted to touch that stomach, and see...
“Follow me,” the man ordered.
***
Siwon stumbled over stones and branches, keeping up with the man’s steady pace. Every so often the dark head would turn, checking his progress. They didn’t walk far, the sound of running water greeting them as they emerged onto a river bank.
They were met by two others.
Siwon was not a coward, by usual standards, but as he stared at the unfamiliar men, he realized that he could not clearly see their faces. He edged closer to the man, the jaguar. The three half dressed men were having a conversation of some sort, in a language Siwon could not identify. Siwon stared between the man beside him and the others, comparing. The man, with his regal nose, the soft mouth and subtle chin. His cheekbones and brown eyes. The drawn brows. The others, their faces blurred, eyes sort of...strangely bright, little white lights through a haze. It was creepy, and bizarre.
The man looked close to despair as he seemed to nearly be begging, and Siwon reached for him, incapable of not giving comfort to someone beside him. The arm beneath Siwon’s hand jerked, the dark eyes meeting his in shock.
“Sorry,” Siwon said. “I... You looked upset.”
“Can you...” The man licked his lips. “Can you see the others?”
“No,” Siwon said with a shake of his head. “No. They are blurred to me. I don’t... Do you know why?”
“I do. Because you were not meant for them... How did you come here, do you know?”
“I dreamed?” Siwon mused. “The jaguar... I was given a wooden one, and...”
“A wooden jaguar?”
“Yes. From a man named Zhou Mi...”
How many hours ago had that been? It seemed like a lifetime ago.
“Zhou Mi.” The man’s skin paled noticeably and the other men sent up a sort of wail at the name. What came out next was a breathy whisper, “Then he sent you for me...”
“Sent me? I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”
“I am Han Geng,” the same told him. “And no, this is no dream. You have come to save me.”
“I tried to earlier,” Siwon said earnestly.
Han Geng laughed, the sound washing over Siwon’s skin. “Yes, you did. Yes. We have much to do.” He looked to where the others had stood and Siwon was startled to find they were no longer there. “They won’t help us. You touched your mouth to mine, before the ritual. That’s why you can understand me. I... I don’t know if I can do this myself, but we have to try...”
“Can I help?” Siwon offered. He wanted the look of dissatisfaction on Han Geng’s face to fade. If he could help... “My name is Siwon, by the way.”
“Siwon,” Han Geng repeated. “Yes. You can help.”
***
Han Geng ordered him to wash, standing nearby to observe as he stripped and waded into the cool water. He scrubbed at his skin with the soft sand, Han Geng pointing out places he had missed, and Siwon scrubbed harder not wanting Han Geng to have to wade closer and do it himself. Even if the thought was somewhat appealing.
Han Geng helped him to dress in the same sort of cloth around his waist, and thought it did not cover much, he felt comfortable in it. More than that, he felt comfortable in the company he was with. Han Geng did not talk much, but there was confidence in his as he moved, holding the heavy jaguar pelt close against himself. This time, Han Geng gripped two of his fingers as they wound back through the steadily heating, brightening forest. He was beginning to sweat, just a bit.
“These berries,” Han Geng said, appearing beside him, after several minutes of him sitting in the clearing where the great tree was. “Would you squeeze them into the bowl?”
The bowl was finely, if inexpertly crafted, and Siwon agreed, carefully squeezing the pale, nearly clear juice into the cup, fishing out bits of skin. Han Geng had disappeared again, returning to set a second cup, full of pulpy fruit juice beside the other one. Siwon chanced to look up, and froze.
Dark lines had been drawn along Han Geng’s lashes, making his eyes seem shockingly light brown beside the black. Faint lines, circles, were on his arms, his sides... Emulating the jaguar, Siwon realized. And it was fascinating. Fascinating that he couldn’t tear his eyes from Han Geng’s face.
Han Geng breathed, picking up the cup of berry juice that Siwon had prepared, drawing lines of sweet liquid on Siwon’s brow and lips, pressing his moist hand to Siwon’s heart.
Drawing his name across Siwon’s stomach.
“Han Geng,” Han Geng said, underlining his name. “I am Han Geng.”
Siwon swallowed, his flesh on fire.
“Please, do the same for me,” Han Geng said, pressing the cup into Siwon’s hand.
Siwon did, Han Geng’s skin heated against his fingers.
“Siwon,” he said, when he had finished his name. “I am Siwon.”
“Drink for me,” Han Geng said, and offered him the cup of thicker, pinkish juice. “Drink all of it. For you, I can provide.”
Siwon drank, finishing it quickly, licking the remnants from his fingers as Han Geng took the cup and moved to him.
“To learn you, your skin, to take you into me...”
Siwon froze as Han Geng sidled against him, their skin sliding together, the cloth at Siwon’s waist falling at Han Geng’s insisting hands. If he breathed too deep, he could smell the skin in front of him, Han Geng’s chest brushing his as they breathed.
He moaned, low, as Han Geng’s hands ghosted his skin. Every place he had left, his scalp, his face, tingled. Han Geng’s lashes were low, hiding his eyes in the black edging.
The touch was more of a caress, crossing his chest, and pausing against his stomach. Han Geng’s eyes rose, meeting his as his hands took a second journey along Siwon’s abdomen. He could see Han Geng’s lips tremble, curve, and he continued, along Siwon’s legs, arms, back... Every inch of skin touched and claimed. Han Geng leaned against his back, breathing against the side of his neck.
“Han Geng...”
“Siwon... Please...”
He wanted Siwon to touch, touch all of him, just as he had done for Siwon. Their eyes met, briefly, the beautiful brown eyes closing as Siwon traced his hands over his face.
Han Geng’s stomach was firm, but almost...pretty. Graceful, like the rest of him. It took all of Siwon’s willpower not to rest his face against it, running his hands along the backs of Han Geng’s thighs. And the cloth that had been covering Han Geng, beside him. He didn’t really question what he was doing, or why. Only that he was compelled to it. Han Geng’s plea was ringing in him. To take you into me, Han Geng had said. Siwon pressed his nose to the nape of Han Geng’s neck, and just breathed, feeling that so intimately. Taking Han Geng into him. This man whose life he had saved, who was now... Thanking him, perhaps?
Han Geng was trembling as Siwon wrapped his arms around him.
“Are you all right?” Siwon asked, and pushed aside the urges of his body, the attraction he felt for the man in front of him. It wasn’t the makeup, the dark markings. It wasn’t the naked skin, though that was all facets of it. It was Han Geng’s eyes, the sadness and longing in them, the quiet joy as Siwon touched him.
“I never thought...” Han Geng turned. “I finally understand why someone would want this. Why someone would...”
He touched Siwon’s mouth with gentle fingers, and Siwon’s hands tightened on Han Geng’s lower back. The pretty mouth parted, begging in a different way.
Their lips brushed, pressing, and Han Geng sighed his name. It was unlike any kiss he had ever had, this kiss with Han Geng, and it did terrible things to him. Any barriers he had expected in Han Geng’s mouth, he found none. Only a sweet hesitancy that seemed to warm at Siwon’s touch. It made him want to pull Han Geng’s hips closer, to bite the slender neck, feel Han Geng’s arms tight around him, and...
Han Geng jerked back, as though he had heard Siwon’s thoughts, as though they disgusted him. There was anger in his eyes. And fear.
“The bird,” Han Geng gasped.
Siwon’s shoulder hit the ground hard as they dove, rolling as the bird swooped low over them. It’s screeching cry scoured them as much as the rush of leaves did.
Where could they go, to escape...
The tree.
“To the tree!” Siwon shouted, standing with Han Geng.
“We can’t... You can’t before we... Siwon!”
They were running before Siwon could process Han Geng’s words.
The scream of the death bird was right behind him, and when he saw the opening of the tree, he headed for it, the speed of his body forcing Han Geng ahead of him, into the cool, into the dark.
“N-no!” Han Geng shouted at him, but Siwon didn’t know why. Another avian scream, and he had forced them into the corner, all his instincts, his feelings, shouting that the only option he had was to cover Han Geng, to protect him, with his own body if need be. You saved his life, he’s yours now. He touched you. He trusts you. He... Han Geng’s back was pressed to the smooth inner curve of the tree, and he jerked against Siwon’s body, eyes wide as he stared over Siwon’s shoulder.
A hiss, the click of a beak.
Pressing Han Geng’s head down, he mouthed nonsense against the long neck. If they were going to die, at least they would be together.
Together. Together...
The fine-grained wood was almost warm beneath his pressing hand, and he thought, All I want is to save us...
He cried out as his shoulder burned, the bird’s scream echoing in the hollows.
He heard Han Geng shout his name.
And remembered nothing after.
***
Siwon came to consciousness in a tangle of limbs, Han Geng heavy on him, and they rolled... Falling.
He grunted, groaned, as he fell with a thud onto the dirt-brown carpet of his bedroom, and Han Geng with him... Well, that wasn’t quite true. He landed on Han Geng more than the carpet.
Wait. His bedroom? If they were in his bedroom, if Han Geng was in his bedroom... Then it really hadn’t been a dream. The man who could change into a jaguar was nearly squashed beneath him. He was fairly certain there was no place on this planet that men could don the skin of an animal and turn into it. Which meant... Had the little wooden jaguar taken him that far from home? Was it even possible?
But he had other concerns right at first.
“We’re on Earth. In Korea!” Siwon said, startled, pushing up onto his elbows. “In my apartment!”
“Apartment?” Han Geng asked, still catching his breath from Siwon’s weight on him.
“The place I live,” Siwon explained, staring fondly down at Han Geng. Han Geng... In his apartment. Who would have imagined... All that tawny skin... He swallowed, shaking his head. “So. Welcome to Earth?”
Han Geng smiled, accepting his hand to help him sit up.
“You don’t live in a tree, then,” Han Geng said, and Siwon laughed at his humor. Well. He hoped it was humor.
Han Geng touched the rug beneath them, the bedspread, staring at the window, the mirror, the light fixture. How foreign it all must seem after the forest.
Siwon helped Han Geng to stand, and let his hand linger a long moment on Han Geng’s, uncomfortably conscious of the fact that they were both still naked. He couldn’t just...touch like this. It wasn’t his right.
“I need a shower,” Siwon said, stepping back toward the bathroom and withdrawing his hand. “Why don’t...”
Han Geng dropped like a stone, eyes impossibly wide as he clutched, almost clawed, at his throat. There was no wheezing, only a desperate struggle. A struggle Siwon registered after several heart-racing moments. Han Geng just couldn’t breathe. He didn’t make any noise as Siwon grabbed him, ready to... Do what? Call for an ambulance, breathe for him... As soon as Siwon’s hands closed over his, Han Geng took in a noisy breath, then two, sucking in oxygen as though it was going to disappear.
“What happened?” Siwon exclaimed, running his hands gently over Han Geng’s shoulders.
“I don’t know... I don’t know,” Han Geng said hoarsely. “You left and I couldn’t... I just couldn’t breathe. Like there was some kind of block inside me.”
“I’m not going to leave you,” Siwon assured him, voice soft. If it had been panic... They would deal with it. He was so far from home. “I’ll get you a drink of water, okay? Come with me.”
Their fingers were lightly tangled as they walked into the kitchen, Han Geng staying close. Siwon smiled at him reassuringly, letting go of Han Geng’s hand to reach for a glass.
Han Geng’s head thumped hollowly against the cupboard door, falling, and reaching before Siwon could even turn. Mouth seeking for something that wasn’t coming...
Once again, he gasped, taking in air as Siwon gathered him close. Han Geng’s body trembled against him, breathing heavily against Siwon’s shoulder. “I can’t... I can’t breathe if you’re not touching me,” he shuddered out.
Siwon clutched him a little tighter, having arrived at the same conclusion.
***
How many Zhou Mis could there be in Seoul? Siwon wondered as he dressed Han Geng. Han Geng’s hands were on his face as Siwon did buttons up their shirts, and tightened the belt and pants around Han Geng’s slender waist. Even dressed, there was a certain wildness to him. He watched Han Geng wiggle his toes inside of his socks as he listened to the phone ring. Their hands were tightly clasped.
“Hello?”
“Zhou Mi?” Siwon demanded.
“Er... No. Just a second.”
The phone was passed, and Zhou Mi had barely gotten out a greeting, when Siwon barged ahead. “This is Siwon, from the club. The jaguar carving. I need to talk to you.”
“Oh!” Zhou Mi said. “You’re...back?”
It was said as though Zhou Mi had known exactly where he had been. What was it Kyuhyun had said? That Zhou Mi had been a real tiger? He just bet Zhou Mi had been. But Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun hadn’t been joined at the hip... Zhou Mi could breathe on his own. He had to find out why.
“Can we come over?”
Instructions were given, and Siwon got a reluctant Han Geng into shoes.
Getting into the car while still joined at the hand had been an interesting feat. Luckily Han Geng was very limber.
Han Geng peered anxiously up at the building. “I got a bad feeling up there, Siwon,” he said softly.
“We’ll fix this,” Siwon said, and squeezed his hand. Getting a bad feeling was no wonder, if he couldn’t breathe...
***
In the apartment next to Siwon’s, a man stretched, waking. Where his thoughts would have normally been filled with stumbling into the bathroom, chugging some orange juice, over those desires a black cloud hung, obscuring them. If he could have described his thoughts, he would have said they were filled with death. But could not... Something else had taken over.
He lifted one arm, then the other, and grinned in pleasure.
Maybe this human did not have a beak or a tail, but it could be very useful indeed...
***