I lost my job ( Read more... )

I think that I've decided on a date that would be appropriate and fitting for my demise. What better day than my birthday? I turn 24 this year on April 9th. I sat up last night tossing and turning, contemplating things, and it struck me as a wildly meaningful number to go out on ( Read more... )

Accidentally let my meds run out again. Refilled now but my head is swimming. Stupid. Very stupid. I know what happens when I let them run out. Jittery and panicky this morning; was without for three days. Gotta avoid that. Have to. It's dangerous to run out. Keep looking at the scissors in the jar on the desk, keep thinking "oh, how easily I could ( Read more... )

You ever go to bed feeling mostly okay and then wake before dawn with a smoldering, cindering, hateful rage burning in your heart and head like some sort of manic psychophant eating away at all form of reason? Of course you haven't, you're a goddamn robot LJ. Well let me tell you it sucks. I hate anger more than any other emotion. So why am I ( Read more... )

Okay, so, we've gotten over the relapsy-ness. But fuck, that shit is hard. My arm's healing up and her system's cleaned out, but ugh. BLEEEEH. Fucking addictions ( Read more... )

We're failing. Not our relationship, not really. The love is strong. Our problems are what are getting us. She relapsed, hard. So did I.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

What are we going to do...?

So I broke my face ( Read more... )

2011. Jeezum crow, Journal. It's 2011. How old are you now? You fucking ancient pile of digitized memories, you ( Read more... )

rrrrRRAAAAAArrrgh, big stretch. Followed up by a yawn and a content sigh. Tis a slow Monday at work, it is, but I'm feeling good despite. The weather is somewhat horrid out but it could be worse; supposed to get worse, actually. :/ Fuckin' snow. FUCK YOU SNOW THAT'S RIGHT I SAID IT. I prefer this powderwhite over the icy torrents we got last year ( Read more... )

Ooooaaauugh. Insomnia-bug-bitten, three days straight with no sleep. Running in one of those "I have to keep moving" deliriums that I've come to know so well. S'good though, I think; been busy busy at work what with Harper's surgery and we had health inspection today so I've been hauling ass, maybe that'll help put me to sleep tonight. Only one day ( Read more... )