I guess it’s time for a bit of an update ( Read more... )

"Das Gute an CFS ist, daß Du nicht daran stirbst. Das Schlechte an CFS ist, daß Du nicht daran stirbst"

Now there are only four days left. Four days and then all of this will be over. All of this will be in the past, a memory, something I might one day tell my grandchildren about ( Read more... )

And maybe there just is no answer. Maybe this doesn’t exit. Maybe I don’t exist.

I hate this life. I hate not knowing 100% for sure what is wrong with me.

I will take my medicines now and sleep. Sleep.

Imagine

Imagine if your life had turned completely upside down.
Imagine not being able to work, or even get around.
Imagine if your social life was to completely disappear,
Imagine friends so busy, and seldom coming near.

Imagine having little energy to carefully spend each day,
Imagine deciding how to spend it, on whatever comes your way.
Imagine ( Read more... )

And it’s hard to think that today in a week’s time this will all be over.

Boston will be in the past.

My future, destroyed, reinvented …who knows.

Yes, I am reading a lot about this now, and it just keeps on getting worse:

"This disease, this syndrome, is actually more debilitating than just about any other medical problem in the world."
Professor Leonard Jason, professor of psychology at DePaul University, USA

When asked on CNN how many of his (ME/CFS) patients had fully recovered in fifteen ( Read more... )

God damn it, I feel so nauseated from all these medicines. I feel so out of this, so apart from this world.

And no, I won’ get over this.

This is my life now. From now on; forever.

It’s been months since I last slept a night without waking up at least ten times. This night I managed to wake up only twice. Even that is an accomplishment for me. I’m not sure if I should really be that happy about this though. After all, it was not my recovering health that made me sleep but medication ( Read more... )

They made me write a letter of withdrawal for university. This way I might at least get some of my tuition fees back:

Dear Sirs and Madams,

I am writing this letter to explain my reason for withdrawing from Boston University.

I started getting a headache in Mid-September. Initially, I thought I was simply getting the flu and keep on attending ( Read more... )