Dear Friends,

After several years of posting, due to recent events, this journal is going to retire soon. I will give a lot of people my new account name when I get one. Thank you for reading.

Abi

so, strangely enough, my pants smell like food. it's not a bad smell, either. it is a very good smell and it's making me hungry. in fact, i find myself smelling them again as i write this, and wondering what kind of food it is so that i can go get some. it has been that kind of day.

so i'm sending this out: i am tired of the guesswork involved in relationships and dating. shouldn't there be a more straightforward way for all of this?

family calling hours were tonight for my great grandfather. his name was paul. he was very nice ( Read more... )

"i never know what to do with my love... i never know what to do with my hands ( Read more... )

((throw up sounds)) that is the sound of me throwing up all over practically everything that is going on in my life right now. i am sick of people's shit.

things are way intense. but what can I say? i cannot be any less than I am. tonight, that meant two things had to happen. one was quite satisfactory, the other wasn't. i don't mean to be cryptic, loves. and this isn't one of those entries that is supposed to mean something to someone specific. all i'm saying is that we have to love ourselves ( Read more... )

i let it matter too much, and that was the wrong thing to do. but i can never apologize, maybe because i'm not sorry (i took a risk, isn't that what we're supposed to do?) and maybe because i know it would only make me feel worse.

but i've made my mind up not to feel foolish about anything.

my dad never mentions the way people look to them. If someone has lost weight or, I don't know, gotten a new face or something, he pretends they haven't. This is because a while ago when he lost a lot of weight he thought it would be a good thing but then he got really bored because no one would talk to him about anything but all the weight he ( Read more... )

i just went and saw Hairspray, which was CRAY-ZEE (spelling mine,) with my sister and nine year old cousin, who is also CRAY-ZEE. both things are somewhat inspiring. i think the reason i like musicals is that you can't help but be happy by the end of them, and they almost always end with everything working out well. this one did ( Read more... )