Happy Valentines Day, Losers!

[bendersgotback]

WHO:  Bender, Zoidberg, Karkat and guests!
WHERE: At a fairly nice Italian restaurant called Sanguinosi
WHEN: Valentines evening!
WARNINGS: Unknown! Most likely no large ones.
SUMMARY:  Bender has decided to scam people with a dating service. Karkat sits and stares angrily. Zoidberg is abused. Hilarity ensues (?!?)
FORMAT: Quick.

Comments

TABLE 7- JACK BAUER and PETER PARKER

[bendersgotback]

Re: TABLE 7- JACK BAUER and PETER PARKER

[incywincyhero]

Peter was half-convinced this whole scenario was a trap. Never mind that the letter had been addressed to "Peter Parker," and neither of his enemies here knew his secret identity. (Neither? Since when did he have so few enemies that he could refer to them as neither? That was an unnerving realization, all right.) It was the paranoia borne of long experience that they really were watching, no matter how unlikely it seemed.

But Spider-Man was an adherent of the "find a trap, spring it" school of fisticuffs, and Peter was hungry. So he found himself walking into the restaurant not only at a vaguely appropriate time, but semi-respectably dressed to boot. He was directed to his table and sat down, taking a quick glance around to see who he recognized. (Was that Hank McCoy? And over there, May? Well, that table would bear close watching.)

[ctu_savior]

Jack was also half-convinced this was a trap. The other 50% was convinced this was some kind of play for arranging a meeting with him. A robot from the future running a dating scam was not a possibility in his mind. Too tired from the madness of the last few weeks to be in the mood for any nonsense, he'd resolved to take the same approach Peter had, and move in with his eyes open. So he'd put on a suit that matched the restaurant and that he could conceal a weapon in and showed up early to scope the place out.

So far, he'd seen enough to be very confused with a side of annoyed, and he was linefacing by the time Peter sat down. "You want to tell me what this is about?"

[incywincyhero]

Peter wasn't sure what he'd been expecting, but it wasn't this. It took him a second to register why the stocky, square-jawed guy looked so familiar, but then he placed the face: Jack Bauer, the police officer who'd been on the network yesterday, and one of the ones who'd helped take Norman down.

Could he -- ? No, even if someone on the force had had the inclination and ability to break the psychic blindspot and find out who Spider-Man was beneath the mask, they wouldn't try to bring him in by setting him up for a blind date. If this was a set-up, they were both patsies.

But Bauer didn't know that, and he was cranky and ... yep, probably armed. Time to clear the air before things got uncomfortable.

"Don't ask me," Peter said, putting on his best sheepish grin. "I'm about as lost here as you look."

[ctu_savior]

None can resist the disarming power of Parker sheepishness. Jack relaxed noticeably as he came to the conclusion that if this was a trap, it was the worst one he'd ever seen. "I got a letter asking me to come here, offering food. Is that what brought you here?"

[incywincyhero]

"Preeeeetty much," Peter drawled. He looked pointedly around the restaurant and shrugged uncomfortably. "I think we've been set up on a blind date. In which case I should probably tell you that there's been a slight misunderstanding somewhere, because I'm straight."

Though Bauer does have great biceps. But still.

[ctu_savior]

"Yeah, same here." Jack sighed and looked around as well. He couldn't believe that someone would go through all the trouble to set up something this childish. Well actually he could believe it easily, which probably showed that he'd been in the City too long. In fact, it would be a year soon enough...

He frowned, then sagged a bit, surrendering. Letting himself be pranked like this was the closest thing to time off he was getting lately. Might as well make the most of it, while there were no crises he needed to get back to. "Well, as long as we're here... you want to order something?"

[incywincyhero]

"Hey, who could turn down free eats? ... Though I guess that's exactly how they roped us in, isn't it?" Assuming this was indeed a prank, the question remained who both knew that Peter was here and would be inclined to set him up for this.

Matt? Had a better sense of humor than most people gave him credit for, but still, not his style. May? Possible, but she didn't really seem the type, and anyway she was sitting at her own table -- who'd want their alternate dad around while on a date? Reilly? Heck no. That left the Avengers, and he couldn't think of who'd want to -- Luke Cage. That sonnuva --

Well, revenge would have to wait. In the mean time, he leaned over the table and put out his hand. "I should introduce myself, by the way -- Peter Parker."

[ctu_savior]

Jack did likewise, shaking the younger man's hand firmly. "Jack Bauer." He was going through a similar mental process as Peter, considering who would have set him up like this. Unfortunately, in his case it was a long list. The police force and STARS in particular seemed to attract mischievous types. Sheldon, Elisa, especially Yusuke... every possibility would be investigated. And then there would be a reckoning, oh yes.

[incywincyhero]

Peter leaned back in his seat, opening the menu placed in front of him but not yet looking. "So, what kind of revenge are you planning on whoever got you into this?" he asked, eyebrow raised.

[ctu_savior]

Jack looked at the menu and needed only a few moments to make a decision. At least this wasn't a bad restaurant. "I'm fairly certain it's a subordinate of mine on the police force," he said, putting the menu down and looking around for a waiter. "If I'm right, they've got a week or so of special training coming their way." He looked back at Peter. "What about you, any suspects?"

should we maybe handwave food ordering idk how this works

[incywincyhero]

"I've only been in the City a few weeks, so there's only one plausible suspect," Peter said, raising an eyebrow over steepled fingers. "I'm thinking I'm gonna let him stew for a few weeks before I let loose with a suitably painful yet entirely legal revenge."

whatever we want I guess

[ctu_savior]

Jack took a moment to order a chicken caeser salad with extra vegetables before replying. "Sounds like a good plan. Let him get complacent, think he's won." He paused, remembering again how close he was to a year in this place. "You just got here? How are you adjusting?"

[incywincyhero]

Having placed his order of spaghetti bolognese, Peter shrugged. "Oh, you know ... it could be worse. At least I know a couple of people here -- obviously -- which puts me in a better position than some of the other newbies, from what I've gathered. And job-hunting sucks in this economy, but," another shrug, "it did back home, too."

[ctu_savior]

"You've got people from home, huh? That's lucky," Jack nodded and bit into a breadstick, chewed, swallowed. "I haven't seen anyone from my own world since I got here, not in reality anyway." Nightmares and hallucinations didn't count. "But I guess that's a good thing, them not having to go through all this."

[incywincyhero]

"That seems to be the Catch-22 of this place," Peter said ruefully. He took a breadstick of his own and looked at it thoughtfully before taking a bite. "You don't want to be stuck here alone," he added, swallowing, "but you don't want your friends to stuck here either."