GUYS. It's the end of January! Which can only mean one thing: it's almost February! Which can only mean one thing, yeah: VALENTINE'S DAY.

Let's decorate the cafe again, un! I went shopping yesterday and found the most perfect tablecloths! They're white with these cute lace frills and pink hearts and Cupids! They are the SO CUTE, un. We HAVE TO USE  ( Read more... )

TOBI.

MY APARTMENT IS CLEAN.

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

Five minutes Itachi, yeah. Don't be late!!!

JUST HAVE SEX

ALREADY.

I am completely serious, yeah. Hidan, Itachi: I want you two to go to Pein's office, or meet at ASS or in the street or in the church or where ever you fuck and I want you to RELIEVE SOME STRESS because fuck, un, you could cut the sexual tension between you two with a knife.

God, un.

ITACHI.

IT WAS THOSE UGLY, BALD, FAT,

LEATHER- WEARING FUCKERS.

IT WAS THEM.

THEY STOLE JASHIN!!!

THEY STOLE OUR MASCOT!!!!

THEY STOLE HIM FROM RIGHT UNDER

YOUR NOSE!! i have no fucking clue how. how did they catch him?

But, yeah. I found the ransom note. They must've sent it to me by accident (what idiots, un). It's dated last Monday... Which is ( Read more... )

Itachi, un. Right now. What would you do?

September twenty-third, two thousand and eight, four- I mean: fifteen hundred hours. I'm standing outside of Itachi's room. It is quiet, yeah. Too quiet. He's been-

[a deep voice is heard from far off, sounding angry and violent. Deidara's voice turns away from the microphone.]

Leave me the fuck alone, Biker-dude!! I didn't steal your stupid twinkies ( Read more... )

[There is a muffled sound as the mic is picked up and dragged somewhere. Heavy breathing can be heard. a creaky door is pushed open. Deidara's voice comes through, strained and near hysterical] Not that bug.... THAT BUG!!!!

[There's a moments pause, only the slight shift of a body turning around is heard, a few seconds of pure nothingness goes by ( Read more... )

[the microphone is hastily turned on, fumbled and dropped. A panicked curse is heard and a soft thump as the mic is replaced on the desk. Then a shrill voice comes through, yelling very loudly]

ITACHI!!! ITACHI OPEN YOUR FUCKING DOOR!! NOW!!!! [a breath is taken,let out shakily. He doesn't sound very stable] OH MY GOD. You have to see this thing! [ ( Read more... )

Oh-kay... I saw this red-haired kid the other day (thought it was Sasori-danna at first, but he was too short, un). He had all this black 'round his eyes (raccoon much?) and looked pretty insane if you ask me. He was hanging around that blond Uzumaki kid and when I passed them he growled at me, un. Seriously growled! What the hell?!