I could be eating PEEN-BUTR M&M'S RIGHT THIS DAMN MINUTE!

Bam!  Living the dream.

Ouch.  That exam chewed me up and spat me out...an 86.  A score that wouldn't have bothered me before, but I've been letting things slip in the move et cetera and I'm worried about a general downward trend.  Classes have gotten harder, while I've been remembering how annoying it is to have homework in my life ( Read more... )

Earlier today, via email:

Me: Dear Blahblahblah and associates, please consider me for your copywriter position posted on Craigslist as I am quite skilled in the art of bullshit. I can bullshit a baboon, I can bullshit a pumpkin squash. I can bullshit to suit the needs of your clients.

Roberto@BlahBlahBlahLLC.com: I just can't see hiring someone ( Read more... )

Today I finally ate it on the lightrail tracks, lost my glove in the grit and maculated wet leaves.  Forever, as it turned out.  "What are you looking for?" a group of under-housed men asked when I returned to the site in the rain slicked dark.  I held up my hands, the left one looking nude as the news.  My glove!  My glove!  "Well, let's find it ( Read more... )

I have a story to tell, and that is the story of butt pimples: I get them.  My dad gets them.  Right now, I have them REALLY REALLY BAD, oh LiveJournal readers.  Can I show you one?  Oh please.

I've gotten them intermittently since I was about 12.  These fuckers survived accutane, they survived a few courses of erythromycin, they survived ( Read more... )

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Heeheeheheee. Call me a cookie, you lyin' sack.

Ah.  I just finished my last set of online columns.  For the past four months, a good 60% of whatever weekend I had (and sometimes this was split, thanks Wildberries) was spent researching and writing seven articles every week.  My shit went up on the internet, every day, for four months.  That was cool.  What wasn't cool was that I wasn't really ( Read more... )

Comments are much appreciated...Papa's nervous that I ain't got a readership.

If you felt like doing something really, really nice for me, just for today...throw up a comment about hot cows or something?

It really annoys me that they change all my '-'s to '--'s. What's that about?

http://www.wiredberries.com/organic_living/2008/03/do_you_need_a_lawyer_to_go_gro.asp

Published.

Sort of.

I cleaned and vacuumed.

Yes, it is newsworthy.