the ongoing conversation ... today, it's responsive women

[burgunder]

one of those friends where
having talked at length
even after they go elsewhere
you keep talking

oh how i love those friends

i'm still continuing conversations with my aunt dot
even though she's been dead for a long time
because she was just exactly that thought-provoking and astute

last night lauren (dj_stitch) and i got on the subject

Comments

It's funny you should mention this

[nplusm]

This is very much how I feel, but from a male point of view.

I'm interested in about 2% of all women. I'm just saying interested...nothing more. In a culture where most women seem idle until I do a certain amount of leg work, it means I have to do leg work before I figure out if I'm interested. That means 50 times doing the leg work before finding 1 girl I'm interested in. In that case, about 1 time in 3 they are interested in me back. So that now means 150 times doing the leg work to find one relationship that goes both ways. That is a horrible ROI. I'm also lazy to a point, and I'm just not willing to do that much leg work.

And thus, I'm single until I either lower my standards or up my leg work.

Re: It's funny you should mention this

[abstractmonkeys]

A wise woman once said, "...learn to play the guitar and they come to you."

Re: It's funny you should mention this

[khallis]

Speaking as someone who's played classical baroque guitar for a decade, I can honestly say this has never, ever worked for me.

Though, in all fairness, I may be doin' it wrong.

[khallis]

This made me smile. I salute you for the consideration and recognition.

It is unlikely to ever be else, I think - girls remain worth the work of instigation, and while that price may sometimes be borne unequally, it is still often worth while. Yet, something in me grins to see it contemplated by a female - there is a mix of camaraderie and amusement together in saying, "Yeah, hard to do, ain't it?". It's not out of any meanness or hostility - rather, I find I draw a sense of reassurance when girls stumble at this prospect as lost as I have been.

[metalmensch]

Precisely so.

[urlgirl]

Interesting to see this in writing, but I sympathize, trust me. Put me down in the "lazy" column, I suppose.

I maintain some kind of romantic notion that when the connection is the right one, this whole instigator/reactor roleplay falls away and eagerness takes over to balance things out. But how people get to that point, specifically how _I_ get to that point - I've no idea.

Responsiveness

[abstractmonkeys]

"the most valued among us are the most responsive, i think

[i_maenad]

Huh. It's not just bi women, it's women. Not so much today as 20 years ago, but still. We're like a bunch of 7th graders at a high school dance, sitting on either side of the gym, regarding each other all aflutter and afraid, waiting for someone -- someone else -- to make that long, long journey across the floor to ask the question. Would you? Will you? May I?

And then, we say no, no, no, and no when we maybe mean yes, and wonder why we're saying no and wonder what it would take to say yes.

Women!

(Gods. I love em.)

.

[burgunder]

Women!

(Gods. I love em.)

A(wo)men. ;>