FIC: "Temporary Monogamy" (Part Six) (Orlando Bloom/Sean Bean, Karl Urban/Sean Bean)
Title: "Temporary Monogamy" (6/27)
Author: Brenda (azewewish)
Pairing: Orlando Bloom/Sean Bean (Karl Urban/Sean Bean)
Click here for full disclaimers & notes.
Prologue | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen | Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen | Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty-One | Part Twenty-Two | Part Twenty-Three | Part Twenty-Four | Part Twenty-Five | Part Twenty-Six | Part Twenty-Seven (and Epilogue) |
Most days, when Orlando wasn't filled to the brim with gratitude for how very lucky he was to be part of these films and to be an integral cog in such an amazing project, he was terrified he was going to bollocks the entire thing up. Sure he considered himself to be a good actor and all, considering he was still pretty green, but Legolas was unlike any character he'd ever studied at Guildhall or tried out for on auditions. Legolas was ancient. A warrior, in the purest sense of the word. His every move was fluid, graceful, honed to perfection by millennia of practice, every word spoken was carefully measured, thought-out, direct.
In short, Legolas was everything that Orlando wasn't. Oh, Orlando knew his strengths well enough, but patience and grace definitely weren't among them. He was too impetuous by half, far too emotional. He'd never be ethereal or wise, not if he lived to be a century. Christ, he went to bloody Viggo for advice, which wasn't at all what anyone would call sane or wise.
But, he was nothing if not determined. Which was one of his strengths, even though Billy told him it was more sheer, stupid stubbornness more than anything else. Whatever it was called, he had it.
Besides, it was worth all the extra training he put himself through to nail shots like the one they were currently filming. His arms groaned in protest from drawing the bow time and time again (he consoled himself with the killer triceps he was forming - chicks dug muscled arms), but he pushed all thoughts of weakness out of his mind. Legolas didn't feel the bitter cold or feel muscle fatigue or feel like his shoulders were going to pop out of their sockets. Legolas' only focus was on killing as many Orcs as possible in his quest to get to Boromir - to save Boromir from harm - before it was too late.
Still, it was rather incongruous to see the object of that quest standing just to the side of one of the cameras, watching the filming, fully costumed with the arrows already in place for his death scene.
"That's rather morbid of you, you know," Orlando pointed out to Sean, once Peter called cut. Never mind that Sean managed to make death look oddly regal. In a very peculiar arrows-sticking-out-of-his-jerkin sort of way. "Does Karl have a fetish for arrows now?"
Sean's lips twitched. "Not quite, and please don't suggest it."
"Wouldn't dream of it." If he did, Karl would probably tell him some graphic fantasy or another. In detail. Probably while sitting on his chest so he couldn't get away. "Still, why're you here?"
"Wanted to watch you in action. You're getting really good with that," Sean remarked, nodding at the bow in Orlando's hands.
"Thanks. All that early morning practice is paying off, I guess." He glowed at the compliment, the leaden feeling in his arms forgotten. Strange how praise from someone like Peter or Ian or Sean could make his day, although maybe it wasn't so odd. Jedi Masters, Billy'd called them once. Well, Orlando knew he was still a sponge.
Sean raised an eyebrow. "You get up early? Since when?"
Orlando grinned. Sean knew him well. "Early by my standards, then, how's that?"
"You have standards?"
This time, Orlando laughed outright. "Tosser."
Sean didn't bother to deny it. The grin crinkled the corners of his eyes when he took a half-bow. The arrows bobbed as he moved; the whole effect was morbid, yet fascinating. "Yes, but you love me for it."
"Well, someone's got to," Orlando replied, and resisted the urge to scratch at his ears. Bloody glue. He was never doing a costume drama again.
Sean clapped him on the back, shaking him out of his thoughts. "You coming 'round the house for the game tonight?"
"Wouldn't miss it," Orlando promised. Then he took his place again, sucked in a deep, cleansing breath, and found his Zen center or whatever the hell the Elvish equivalent was. Became Legolas one more time.
***
"Buggering fucking bugger, y'stupid, no - no, block the damn - fucking YES!! YES!!!"
Sean jumped up from the sofa, popcorn and crisps spilling everywhere, and raised his fists to the heavens. The next moment, he leaned down to press a hard, heartfelt kiss to Karl's lips. "Fucking brilliant!!"
"Looks like someone'll be getting laid tonight," Dom remarked with a grin. He was comfortably sprawled on the floor between Orlando and Billy, half empty bowl of popcorn in front of them.
"I love the Blades," Karl cheerfully agreed, and licked his lips.
"Just think if they ever get a Premiereship invite," Billy nodded.
"I don't think even Karl has that sort of stamina," Viggo remarked, from his splayed out position on the chair next to the sofa.
Karl waved Viggo off with a flutter of fingers. "Bite your tongue, I've got outstanding stamina."
"That you do. He's just jealous because you chose me, not him," Sean grinned. "Isn't that right, Vig?"
"Maybe I wanted you instead."
"Oooh hooo, man drama!" Dom and Billy crowed in unison; Orlando just shook his head. Viggo was in for it now.
"Got a taste for the Northern side of things, do you?" Sean asked, hovering over Viggo, arms braced on the back of the chair, neatly trapping Viggo in place. Not that Viggo looked particularly perturbed by it. Not a lot truly upset Viggo. Orlando thought it was on account of all of the pot he smoked and such.
"Maybe," Viggo drawled, giving the word at least twelve extra syllables.
Orlando rolled his eyes at Karl in commiseration, and Karl winked back. "Just kiss him already and show him what he's been missing," Karl said.
"Since you suggested it..."
Before Viggo could object (not that Orlando thought Viggo would object, being the perverse sort of man he was), Sean leaned down and pressed a firm kiss to Viggo's lips.
"Satisfied?" Sean asked, with a smirk.
Viggo shrugged. "No tongue."
"I only give younger men the tongue," Sean replied, in what Orlando thought of as his 'schoolmaster' voice.
Viggo waved a hand to the group on the floor. "Go on, then, take your pick. But I gotta see tongue."
Like Orlando said, Viggo was a perverse bastard.
Billy's hand shot up like a canon. "Oh, pick me, pick me!!"
"Slut," Dom replied, affectionately. "You only want him because his tongue's been with Karl's tongue."
"I cannae help it, I like to live vicariously."
Karl shook his head with a laugh. "Come to me when you're older."
"I'm older than you right now."
"I have a ten year differential starting point."
"Bugger."
"Just for that insult, my tongue shall be Orlando's," Sean declared, with the fakest anguished voice ever spoken.
Orlando's head snapped up. Do what??? "Oi, wait a minute, I -"
The next thing he knew, a warm mouth on his and a soft tongue was fluttering along his half-parted lips. The kiss was heated, slightly damp, and over before Orlando could fully register either.
"That's cheating, that is," Dom declared, with a toss of popcorn in Sean's direction. "That was totally not proper tongue action."
"Thank fuck," Orlando replied, fervently. His lips still tingled from the scratch of Sean's beard. Honestly, he had the oddest friends... "I'm not anyone's consolation prize, thank you."
"Tell that to Prissy," Karl grinned.
"Karl..."
"Simmer down, Vig, I'm not slagging your woman. But you have to admit, she's gone above and beyond to try to pass Orlando around to her friends like some sort of party favor."
For the second time in less than a minute, Orlando had the breath knocked out of him. He stared at Viggo with what he was sure was a bug-eyed expression. "You're dating Priscilla? Harry's Priscilla?"
Viggo shrugged nonchalantly. "I told you it was no one on the shoot."
"Yes, but..." Harry's Priscilla. Viggo was doing the whole temporary monogamy thingy with Harry's Priscilla. Fuck, it was too much to contemplate. And his lips were still bloody tingling. He was killing Sean first thing, see if he wasn't.
"That was my reaction," Karl said, nodding in sympathy.
"Be nice," Sean said, and took back his seat next to Karl, nudging Karl's shoulder with his own. "Can't have you two fighting, who would terrorize the sheep then?"
Karl smiled slightly, but Orlando could tell everything was alright from the way that Karl leaned into Sean's warmth. "Good point."
Viggo fished his camera out of his ever-present backpack, and tossed it into Orlando's lap. "Here. I meant to give this to you earlier so you could take a few shots, get some practice in."
Viggo's odd and possibly immoral dating habits were momentarily forgotten (honestly, dating Priscilla was like dating Samantha and that was wrong on a whole level of wrong) as Orlando picked the camera up with all of the reverence of holding a holy relic. "You're letting me handle the Yashica?"
"Don't worry, it doesn't mean we're engaged."
"Good, since I wouldn't have you," Orlando retorted, with a cheeky grin, even as his hands itched to play with the knobs and lens on the camera. Fuck, man, the Yashica... "Dom might could be persuaded, though."
Dom made a small hmph of annoyance. "Not if he's playing favorites and giving you gifts. I'm not that easy."
"Yes, you are," Billy argued.
"Alright, maybe I am, but he doesn't need to know that."
"Dom, love, everyone on the island knows," Karl replied.
"Ah, well, that's alright, then. I'd hate to waste time being coy."
"You even know what that means?" Orlando asked, smirking.
"It means I'm getting laid and you're not, picky bastard."
"Just because I have standards..."
Sean quirked an eyebrow. "Didn't we discuss that this morning?"
"Hush, you, or I'll hide outside your bedroom window and take pictures of you modeling lingerie for Karl."
"And to think I told you to keep that to yourself," Karl mock-lamented.
Dom's jaw dropped. "Fuck me, you too?"
Orlando bit his bottom lip to keep from laughing. Karl shook his head. "Dommie, love, you're the only cross-dresser among us, sorry."
"I dunno, I have my suspicions about Bernard," Viggo drawled.
"I dare you to say that to his face," Billy replied.
"He wouldn't dream of raising Bernard's hackles," Dom said confidently.
"You know, you're smarter than you look, Hobbit."
"Thanks, Sean, that's...hey now, wait a minute!"
Orlando had the camera up before he could think about it. The expression on Dom's face alone was good for blackmail material for a month, he was sure of it. He was still chuckling over his own wit when he swung the camera towards the sofa. Karl and Sean were still nestled together, shoulders, hips and thighs touching in a long line. One of Sean's hands rested comfortably on top of Karl's. Orlando zoomed in - Sean's fingers were scraped from sword practice, fit through Karl's fingers, capable and strong - and snapped the shutter.
He thought maybe he'd give them a copy for Christmas.
(To Be Continued)
Author: Brenda (azewewish)
Pairing: Orlando Bloom/Sean Bean (Karl Urban/Sean Bean)
Click here for full disclaimers & notes.
Prologue | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen | Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen | Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty-One | Part Twenty-Two | Part Twenty-Three | Part Twenty-Four | Part Twenty-Five | Part Twenty-Six | Part Twenty-Seven (and Epilogue) |
Most days, when Orlando wasn't filled to the brim with gratitude for how very lucky he was to be part of these films and to be an integral cog in such an amazing project, he was terrified he was going to bollocks the entire thing up. Sure he considered himself to be a good actor and all, considering he was still pretty green, but Legolas was unlike any character he'd ever studied at Guildhall or tried out for on auditions. Legolas was ancient. A warrior, in the purest sense of the word. His every move was fluid, graceful, honed to perfection by millennia of practice, every word spoken was carefully measured, thought-out, direct.
In short, Legolas was everything that Orlando wasn't. Oh, Orlando knew his strengths well enough, but patience and grace definitely weren't among them. He was too impetuous by half, far too emotional. He'd never be ethereal or wise, not if he lived to be a century. Christ, he went to bloody Viggo for advice, which wasn't at all what anyone would call sane or wise.
But, he was nothing if not determined. Which was one of his strengths, even though Billy told him it was more sheer, stupid stubbornness more than anything else. Whatever it was called, he had it.
Besides, it was worth all the extra training he put himself through to nail shots like the one they were currently filming. His arms groaned in protest from drawing the bow time and time again (he consoled himself with the killer triceps he was forming - chicks dug muscled arms), but he pushed all thoughts of weakness out of his mind. Legolas didn't feel the bitter cold or feel muscle fatigue or feel like his shoulders were going to pop out of their sockets. Legolas' only focus was on killing as many Orcs as possible in his quest to get to Boromir - to save Boromir from harm - before it was too late.
Still, it was rather incongruous to see the object of that quest standing just to the side of one of the cameras, watching the filming, fully costumed with the arrows already in place for his death scene.
"That's rather morbid of you, you know," Orlando pointed out to Sean, once Peter called cut. Never mind that Sean managed to make death look oddly regal. In a very peculiar arrows-sticking-out-of-his-jerkin sort of way. "Does Karl have a fetish for arrows now?"
Sean's lips twitched. "Not quite, and please don't suggest it."
"Wouldn't dream of it." If he did, Karl would probably tell him some graphic fantasy or another. In detail. Probably while sitting on his chest so he couldn't get away. "Still, why're you here?"
"Wanted to watch you in action. You're getting really good with that," Sean remarked, nodding at the bow in Orlando's hands.
"Thanks. All that early morning practice is paying off, I guess." He glowed at the compliment, the leaden feeling in his arms forgotten. Strange how praise from someone like Peter or Ian or Sean could make his day, although maybe it wasn't so odd. Jedi Masters, Billy'd called them once. Well, Orlando knew he was still a sponge.
Sean raised an eyebrow. "You get up early? Since when?"
Orlando grinned. Sean knew him well. "Early by my standards, then, how's that?"
"You have standards?"
This time, Orlando laughed outright. "Tosser."
Sean didn't bother to deny it. The grin crinkled the corners of his eyes when he took a half-bow. The arrows bobbed as he moved; the whole effect was morbid, yet fascinating. "Yes, but you love me for it."
"Well, someone's got to," Orlando replied, and resisted the urge to scratch at his ears. Bloody glue. He was never doing a costume drama again.
Sean clapped him on the back, shaking him out of his thoughts. "You coming 'round the house for the game tonight?"
"Wouldn't miss it," Orlando promised. Then he took his place again, sucked in a deep, cleansing breath, and found his Zen center or whatever the hell the Elvish equivalent was. Became Legolas one more time.
***
"Buggering fucking bugger, y'stupid, no - no, block the damn - fucking YES!! YES!!!"
Sean jumped up from the sofa, popcorn and crisps spilling everywhere, and raised his fists to the heavens. The next moment, he leaned down to press a hard, heartfelt kiss to Karl's lips. "Fucking brilliant!!"
"Looks like someone'll be getting laid tonight," Dom remarked with a grin. He was comfortably sprawled on the floor between Orlando and Billy, half empty bowl of popcorn in front of them.
"I love the Blades," Karl cheerfully agreed, and licked his lips.
"Just think if they ever get a Premiereship invite," Billy nodded.
"I don't think even Karl has that sort of stamina," Viggo remarked, from his splayed out position on the chair next to the sofa.
Karl waved Viggo off with a flutter of fingers. "Bite your tongue, I've got outstanding stamina."
"That you do. He's just jealous because you chose me, not him," Sean grinned. "Isn't that right, Vig?"
"Maybe I wanted you instead."
"Oooh hooo, man drama!" Dom and Billy crowed in unison; Orlando just shook his head. Viggo was in for it now.
"Got a taste for the Northern side of things, do you?" Sean asked, hovering over Viggo, arms braced on the back of the chair, neatly trapping Viggo in place. Not that Viggo looked particularly perturbed by it. Not a lot truly upset Viggo. Orlando thought it was on account of all of the pot he smoked and such.
"Maybe," Viggo drawled, giving the word at least twelve extra syllables.
Orlando rolled his eyes at Karl in commiseration, and Karl winked back. "Just kiss him already and show him what he's been missing," Karl said.
"Since you suggested it..."
Before Viggo could object (not that Orlando thought Viggo would object, being the perverse sort of man he was), Sean leaned down and pressed a firm kiss to Viggo's lips.
"Satisfied?" Sean asked, with a smirk.
Viggo shrugged. "No tongue."
"I only give younger men the tongue," Sean replied, in what Orlando thought of as his 'schoolmaster' voice.
Viggo waved a hand to the group on the floor. "Go on, then, take your pick. But I gotta see tongue."
Like Orlando said, Viggo was a perverse bastard.
Billy's hand shot up like a canon. "Oh, pick me, pick me!!"
"Slut," Dom replied, affectionately. "You only want him because his tongue's been with Karl's tongue."
"I cannae help it, I like to live vicariously."
Karl shook his head with a laugh. "Come to me when you're older."
"I'm older than you right now."
"I have a ten year differential starting point."
"Bugger."
"Just for that insult, my tongue shall be Orlando's," Sean declared, with the fakest anguished voice ever spoken.
Orlando's head snapped up. Do what??? "Oi, wait a minute, I -"
The next thing he knew, a warm mouth on his and a soft tongue was fluttering along his half-parted lips. The kiss was heated, slightly damp, and over before Orlando could fully register either.
"That's cheating, that is," Dom declared, with a toss of popcorn in Sean's direction. "That was totally not proper tongue action."
"Thank fuck," Orlando replied, fervently. His lips still tingled from the scratch of Sean's beard. Honestly, he had the oddest friends... "I'm not anyone's consolation prize, thank you."
"Tell that to Prissy," Karl grinned.
"Karl..."
"Simmer down, Vig, I'm not slagging your woman. But you have to admit, she's gone above and beyond to try to pass Orlando around to her friends like some sort of party favor."
For the second time in less than a minute, Orlando had the breath knocked out of him. He stared at Viggo with what he was sure was a bug-eyed expression. "You're dating Priscilla? Harry's Priscilla?"
Viggo shrugged nonchalantly. "I told you it was no one on the shoot."
"Yes, but..." Harry's Priscilla. Viggo was doing the whole temporary monogamy thingy with Harry's Priscilla. Fuck, it was too much to contemplate. And his lips were still bloody tingling. He was killing Sean first thing, see if he wasn't.
"That was my reaction," Karl said, nodding in sympathy.
"Be nice," Sean said, and took back his seat next to Karl, nudging Karl's shoulder with his own. "Can't have you two fighting, who would terrorize the sheep then?"
Karl smiled slightly, but Orlando could tell everything was alright from the way that Karl leaned into Sean's warmth. "Good point."
Viggo fished his camera out of his ever-present backpack, and tossed it into Orlando's lap. "Here. I meant to give this to you earlier so you could take a few shots, get some practice in."
Viggo's odd and possibly immoral dating habits were momentarily forgotten (honestly, dating Priscilla was like dating Samantha and that was wrong on a whole level of wrong) as Orlando picked the camera up with all of the reverence of holding a holy relic. "You're letting me handle the Yashica?"
"Don't worry, it doesn't mean we're engaged."
"Good, since I wouldn't have you," Orlando retorted, with a cheeky grin, even as his hands itched to play with the knobs and lens on the camera. Fuck, man, the Yashica... "Dom might could be persuaded, though."
Dom made a small hmph of annoyance. "Not if he's playing favorites and giving you gifts. I'm not that easy."
"Yes, you are," Billy argued.
"Alright, maybe I am, but he doesn't need to know that."
"Dom, love, everyone on the island knows," Karl replied.
"Ah, well, that's alright, then. I'd hate to waste time being coy."
"You even know what that means?" Orlando asked, smirking.
"It means I'm getting laid and you're not, picky bastard."
"Just because I have standards..."
Sean quirked an eyebrow. "Didn't we discuss that this morning?"
"Hush, you, or I'll hide outside your bedroom window and take pictures of you modeling lingerie for Karl."
"And to think I told you to keep that to yourself," Karl mock-lamented.
Dom's jaw dropped. "Fuck me, you too?"
Orlando bit his bottom lip to keep from laughing. Karl shook his head. "Dommie, love, you're the only cross-dresser among us, sorry."
"I dunno, I have my suspicions about Bernard," Viggo drawled.
"I dare you to say that to his face," Billy replied.
"He wouldn't dream of raising Bernard's hackles," Dom said confidently.
"You know, you're smarter than you look, Hobbit."
"Thanks, Sean, that's...hey now, wait a minute!"
Orlando had the camera up before he could think about it. The expression on Dom's face alone was good for blackmail material for a month, he was sure of it. He was still chuckling over his own wit when he swung the camera towards the sofa. Karl and Sean were still nestled together, shoulders, hips and thighs touching in a long line. One of Sean's hands rested comfortably on top of Karl's. Orlando zoomed in - Sean's fingers were scraped from sword practice, fit through Karl's fingers, capable and strong - and snapped the shutter.
He thought maybe he'd give them a copy for Christmas.
(To Be Continued)