FIC: "Temporary Monogamy" (Part Five) (Orlando Bloom/Sean Bean, Karl Urban/Sean Bean)
Title: "Temporary Monogamy" (5/27)
Author: Brenda (azewewish)
Pairing: Orlando Bloom/Sean Bean (Karl Urban/Sean Bean)
Click here for full disclaimers & notes.
Prologue | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen | Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen | Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty-One | Part Twenty-Two | Part Twenty-Three | Part Twenty-Four | Part Twenty-Five | Part Twenty-Six | Part Twenty-Seven (and Epilogue) |
Orlando never realized exactly how much on the job training was involved in a role on a day to day basis (he'd assumed, rather naïvely, that the rehearsal process would be the end of that) - or that he'd have to get up so bloody early to do the whole thing. He was all for suffering for his art or craft or what have you, but sometimes the hours they kept were just criminal. Thankfully, however, he never had to suffer alone. And there was always plenty of coffee available. He honestly had no idea what people did without it.
"So, what happened to you last night?" Viggo asked. His horse shifted sideways and Viggo calmed him with a murmured word. They were in the paddocks this morning, getting comfortable with the horses for their upcoming battle scenes and, more importantly, letting the horses get comfortable with them. Already, Viggo had bonded with his like they were old friends. It wouldn't surprise Orlando if Viggo was also fluent in equine. Man spoke more languages than the U.N.
"Me and Sean went down to the pub, played a few rounds of darts, and spent hours chatting with everyone - man knows damn near the whole country by now, I think," Orlando said, then grimaced and peeled away a bit of ear glue. No matter how well he washed his face at the end of every day, he still found random bits stuck to various body parts. Damned embarrassing, that. "Fuck it all, I'm not gonna have any skin left by the end of the bloody shoot."
"Small price to pay for your ethereal beauty onscreen." Viggo's smile was far too toothy.
"You're lucky we're on horseback, I'll have you know."
"Promises, promises," Viggo replied, clearly not concerned by Orlando's promised retaliation. "By the way, did Sean introduce you to his harem?"
"Sean has a harem?" Not that Sean shouldn't have a harem, mind - he was The Sean Bean, after all - but Orlando was under the impression that he and Karl were pretty exclusive, if rather casual about it. Plus, if Sean had a harem, he'd have told Orlando about it. Wouldn't he? Or, at the very least, offered to introduce him or share or something.
"So Karl says. Apparently, he's got himself a group of women that trail along after him like you used to."
"Oi, I did not 'trail along after him', as you put it," Orlando retorted, brows furrowed in annoyance. His own horse whinnied softly, breath puffing white in the chill morning air, as if he could sense Orlando's ire.
"You were like a lovesick schoolgirl."
"Stop taking the piss, I wasn't that bad." But then, even if he had been, who would have blamed him? He hadn't been used to being in the company of a man that good-looking and rugged. Seriously, look up the word 'manly' in the bloody dictionary, and there would totally be a picture of Sean. Who wouldn't want to emulate that?
"Yeah, you were," Viggo grinned. It always looked slightly evil. It was a wonder Viggo didn't play more villains. "But you should give some serious thought into going after the harem. Sean won't give them the time of day, so the field would be all yours. Apparently, they're real lookers, too."
"Wait. Why hasn't he done any of them? He and Karl getting serious or something?" And if they were, why didn't he know about it? Why the hell did Viggo know all of this and he didn't?
"Dunno. Every time I've asked Sean about the harem...or Karl, for that matter...all I've gotten is this look," Viggo shrugged. "So I stopped."
"Doesn't that seem odd to you?" Sure, Sean wasn't the sort to spill his guts over a pint, but he was a good one for answering direct questions most of the time.
"This is Sean. He follows his own set of rules."
Which was a bit like the pot calling the kettle crazy, but there you were. That was Viggo for you. He and logic weren't the coziest of companions.
***
"So, what happened to you last night?" Karl asked, hip-checking the refrigerator door to close it and setting the salad bowl on the table. Once again, Sean thanked whatever gods were out there that he'd managed to fall quite nicely into an easy relationship with someone who was not only the dogs bollocks in bed, but could also cook.
Harry Sinclair was a bloody idiot for letting a man like that get away. Not that he and Karl ever really talked about why he and Harry had ended it. Besides, they seemed to have an amiable enough relationship, which was more than Sean could say about his relationships with his ex-wives (and his current soon-to-be-ex, for that matter.)
Sean set the plate of grilled burgers on the table and took his seat. "Me and 'Lando popped down to the pub for a few pints," he said, answering Karl's question. "Poor lad, I think he was feeling slightly claustrophobic by all of the roving eyes on him."
Karl took his seat, and grabbed a toasted bun. Immediately, he dropped it, blowing on the tips of his fingers to cool them. "Fucking hell," he said, wrinkling his nose in a pained grimace. Looked sort of cute, in a very masculine way.
Sean hid his smile. "Careful there. I hear things're hot when they're just out of the oven."
Karl waved his fork at Sean like a weapon. "Hush you, or I'll start making you eat in the tents for dinner instead of popping over to cook."
"Fuck forbid," Sean shuddered. "Food there's not fit for a dog."
"Exactly, so behave."
Sean's reply was immediate, reflexive. "But you prefer it when I don't."
It only took Karl a moment to give a laugh of agreement. "True enough," he replied, with that sexy half-smile that Sean liked so much. "Anyway, about Orlando, I don't think this idea of Viggo's is going to work."
"That's because it's a shite idea," Sean stated, stabbing a tomato with more force than was strictly necessary. "Did you see him last night? Christ, he's not even over that bitch from back home and there were girls just throwing themselves at him. I thought he might pass out at one point."
"Yeah, he definitely had a deer in the headlights look about him."
"Getting waylaid by a crowd of horny women'll do that to a man."
"Normally that's not something I would find traumatizing," Karl grinned. "But I certainly wouldn't have gotten Prissy involved. She's got horrid taste in friends."
From what Sean had been able to gather from the small clues Karl and Harry had given, Priscilla had never exactly warmed to the idea of Karl in Harry's life, so he wasn't surprised at the bitter tone. "Well, she's Viggo's problem these days, now, isn't she?"
Karl snorted in distaste. "And thank Christ for it, although I'd have thought he'd have better taste than to get tangled in her web."
"Who said Viggo had any taste?" Sean laughed.
"True enough."
Sean grabbed a bun (now sufficiently cooled) and started slathering a ridiculous amount of mustard on it. "But you mark my words, this whole temporary monogamy thing Viggo's gotten him into is insane, even for him."
"Don't look at me, I had no part in it," Karl said, holding up his hands in self-defense. "Although I do find it slightly ironic that you're slagging on Orlando for wanting the sort of relationship that you and I are currently enjoying."
Sean could feel the frown wrinkling the skin between his brows. "Well, it's different for us, now, t'innit? We're older, seen a bit of the world."
Karl paused in thought, then nodded. "Orlando does seem the type to fall for the first nice pair of legs he sees."
"Exactly. And he's vulnerable right now. The last person on earth I would want dispensing relationship advice to him would be Viggo."
"You're a smart man."
"Good of you to notice," Sean smirked, and ducked out of the way of the napkin Karl chucked at him. "Besides, the way you two act around each other, if I was going to throw anyone in Orlando's path, it'd be you."
"Nah, he's gorgeous, but far too young," Karl said, with a salacious grin. "I like my men to be well-seasoned."
"Makes me sound like a bloody steak," Sean grumbled, but there was no real indignation behind it.
"I'd make the obvious joke about slathering you in sauce, but you'd probably just chuck my own napkin back at me," Karl chuckled.
"Perv."
"Kettle."
They both smiled at each other in perfect understanding. "Anyway, Orlando's not ready for a bloke like me," Karl continued, crunching on a bite of lettuce. "Not for his first man. Now you, maybe, or Marton, you'd both be gentle with him, show him the ropes."
Sean barely caught himself before he choked on his beer. "Marton?"
"Oh yeah, biggest romantic softie on the planet, that one," Karl nodded. "Sticks mostly to women, but he's been known to dabble with men, at least, according to Lawrence."
"Well, he'd know," Sean agreed amiably. "And I'm shite with the virginal type. Besides, I'm not quite ready to throw you over for a younger model just yet," he added with a wink.
"Good thing, too, as I've got plans for dessert after dinner," Karl replied, with the sort of calm voice that got Sean instantly hard.
"Do you now?" He was rather proud of his own insouciant tone.
"Mmhmm," Karl replied noncommittally, even though his lips quirked in a way that had Sean aching to nibble on them. "Now pass me the mustard before you use it all."
"Yes, mum."
"And don't you forget it."
(To Be Continued)
Author: Brenda (azewewish)
Pairing: Orlando Bloom/Sean Bean (Karl Urban/Sean Bean)
Click here for full disclaimers & notes.
Prologue | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen | Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen | Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty-One | Part Twenty-Two | Part Twenty-Three | Part Twenty-Four | Part Twenty-Five | Part Twenty-Six | Part Twenty-Seven (and Epilogue) |
Orlando never realized exactly how much on the job training was involved in a role on a day to day basis (he'd assumed, rather naïvely, that the rehearsal process would be the end of that) - or that he'd have to get up so bloody early to do the whole thing. He was all for suffering for his art or craft or what have you, but sometimes the hours they kept were just criminal. Thankfully, however, he never had to suffer alone. And there was always plenty of coffee available. He honestly had no idea what people did without it.
"So, what happened to you last night?" Viggo asked. His horse shifted sideways and Viggo calmed him with a murmured word. They were in the paddocks this morning, getting comfortable with the horses for their upcoming battle scenes and, more importantly, letting the horses get comfortable with them. Already, Viggo had bonded with his like they were old friends. It wouldn't surprise Orlando if Viggo was also fluent in equine. Man spoke more languages than the U.N.
"Me and Sean went down to the pub, played a few rounds of darts, and spent hours chatting with everyone - man knows damn near the whole country by now, I think," Orlando said, then grimaced and peeled away a bit of ear glue. No matter how well he washed his face at the end of every day, he still found random bits stuck to various body parts. Damned embarrassing, that. "Fuck it all, I'm not gonna have any skin left by the end of the bloody shoot."
"Small price to pay for your ethereal beauty onscreen." Viggo's smile was far too toothy.
"You're lucky we're on horseback, I'll have you know."
"Promises, promises," Viggo replied, clearly not concerned by Orlando's promised retaliation. "By the way, did Sean introduce you to his harem?"
"Sean has a harem?" Not that Sean shouldn't have a harem, mind - he was The Sean Bean, after all - but Orlando was under the impression that he and Karl were pretty exclusive, if rather casual about it. Plus, if Sean had a harem, he'd have told Orlando about it. Wouldn't he? Or, at the very least, offered to introduce him or share or something.
"So Karl says. Apparently, he's got himself a group of women that trail along after him like you used to."
"Oi, I did not 'trail along after him', as you put it," Orlando retorted, brows furrowed in annoyance. His own horse whinnied softly, breath puffing white in the chill morning air, as if he could sense Orlando's ire.
"You were like a lovesick schoolgirl."
"Stop taking the piss, I wasn't that bad." But then, even if he had been, who would have blamed him? He hadn't been used to being in the company of a man that good-looking and rugged. Seriously, look up the word 'manly' in the bloody dictionary, and there would totally be a picture of Sean. Who wouldn't want to emulate that?
"Yeah, you were," Viggo grinned. It always looked slightly evil. It was a wonder Viggo didn't play more villains. "But you should give some serious thought into going after the harem. Sean won't give them the time of day, so the field would be all yours. Apparently, they're real lookers, too."
"Wait. Why hasn't he done any of them? He and Karl getting serious or something?" And if they were, why didn't he know about it? Why the hell did Viggo know all of this and he didn't?
"Dunno. Every time I've asked Sean about the harem...or Karl, for that matter...all I've gotten is this look," Viggo shrugged. "So I stopped."
"Doesn't that seem odd to you?" Sure, Sean wasn't the sort to spill his guts over a pint, but he was a good one for answering direct questions most of the time.
"This is Sean. He follows his own set of rules."
Which was a bit like the pot calling the kettle crazy, but there you were. That was Viggo for you. He and logic weren't the coziest of companions.
***
"So, what happened to you last night?" Karl asked, hip-checking the refrigerator door to close it and setting the salad bowl on the table. Once again, Sean thanked whatever gods were out there that he'd managed to fall quite nicely into an easy relationship with someone who was not only the dogs bollocks in bed, but could also cook.
Harry Sinclair was a bloody idiot for letting a man like that get away. Not that he and Karl ever really talked about why he and Harry had ended it. Besides, they seemed to have an amiable enough relationship, which was more than Sean could say about his relationships with his ex-wives (and his current soon-to-be-ex, for that matter.)
Sean set the plate of grilled burgers on the table and took his seat. "Me and 'Lando popped down to the pub for a few pints," he said, answering Karl's question. "Poor lad, I think he was feeling slightly claustrophobic by all of the roving eyes on him."
Karl took his seat, and grabbed a toasted bun. Immediately, he dropped it, blowing on the tips of his fingers to cool them. "Fucking hell," he said, wrinkling his nose in a pained grimace. Looked sort of cute, in a very masculine way.
Sean hid his smile. "Careful there. I hear things're hot when they're just out of the oven."
Karl waved his fork at Sean like a weapon. "Hush you, or I'll start making you eat in the tents for dinner instead of popping over to cook."
"Fuck forbid," Sean shuddered. "Food there's not fit for a dog."
"Exactly, so behave."
Sean's reply was immediate, reflexive. "But you prefer it when I don't."
It only took Karl a moment to give a laugh of agreement. "True enough," he replied, with that sexy half-smile that Sean liked so much. "Anyway, about Orlando, I don't think this idea of Viggo's is going to work."
"That's because it's a shite idea," Sean stated, stabbing a tomato with more force than was strictly necessary. "Did you see him last night? Christ, he's not even over that bitch from back home and there were girls just throwing themselves at him. I thought he might pass out at one point."
"Yeah, he definitely had a deer in the headlights look about him."
"Getting waylaid by a crowd of horny women'll do that to a man."
"Normally that's not something I would find traumatizing," Karl grinned. "But I certainly wouldn't have gotten Prissy involved. She's got horrid taste in friends."
From what Sean had been able to gather from the small clues Karl and Harry had given, Priscilla had never exactly warmed to the idea of Karl in Harry's life, so he wasn't surprised at the bitter tone. "Well, she's Viggo's problem these days, now, isn't she?"
Karl snorted in distaste. "And thank Christ for it, although I'd have thought he'd have better taste than to get tangled in her web."
"Who said Viggo had any taste?" Sean laughed.
"True enough."
Sean grabbed a bun (now sufficiently cooled) and started slathering a ridiculous amount of mustard on it. "But you mark my words, this whole temporary monogamy thing Viggo's gotten him into is insane, even for him."
"Don't look at me, I had no part in it," Karl said, holding up his hands in self-defense. "Although I do find it slightly ironic that you're slagging on Orlando for wanting the sort of relationship that you and I are currently enjoying."
Sean could feel the frown wrinkling the skin between his brows. "Well, it's different for us, now, t'innit? We're older, seen a bit of the world."
Karl paused in thought, then nodded. "Orlando does seem the type to fall for the first nice pair of legs he sees."
"Exactly. And he's vulnerable right now. The last person on earth I would want dispensing relationship advice to him would be Viggo."
"You're a smart man."
"Good of you to notice," Sean smirked, and ducked out of the way of the napkin Karl chucked at him. "Besides, the way you two act around each other, if I was going to throw anyone in Orlando's path, it'd be you."
"Nah, he's gorgeous, but far too young," Karl said, with a salacious grin. "I like my men to be well-seasoned."
"Makes me sound like a bloody steak," Sean grumbled, but there was no real indignation behind it.
"I'd make the obvious joke about slathering you in sauce, but you'd probably just chuck my own napkin back at me," Karl chuckled.
"Perv."
"Kettle."
They both smiled at each other in perfect understanding. "Anyway, Orlando's not ready for a bloke like me," Karl continued, crunching on a bite of lettuce. "Not for his first man. Now you, maybe, or Marton, you'd both be gentle with him, show him the ropes."
Sean barely caught himself before he choked on his beer. "Marton?"
"Oh yeah, biggest romantic softie on the planet, that one," Karl nodded. "Sticks mostly to women, but he's been known to dabble with men, at least, according to Lawrence."
"Well, he'd know," Sean agreed amiably. "And I'm shite with the virginal type. Besides, I'm not quite ready to throw you over for a younger model just yet," he added with a wink.
"Good thing, too, as I've got plans for dessert after dinner," Karl replied, with the sort of calm voice that got Sean instantly hard.
"Do you now?" He was rather proud of his own insouciant tone.
"Mmhmm," Karl replied noncommittally, even though his lips quirked in a way that had Sean aching to nibble on them. "Now pass me the mustard before you use it all."
"Yes, mum."
"And don't you forget it."
(To Be Continued)