FILLED: I wear my love without shame (Dean/Cas, Balthazar), PG13, 1/?janie_tangerineJune 26 2011, 14:28:36 UTC
So I couldn't resist. Sigh. Procrastination, procrastination.
Dean goes over it about fifteen times before realizing that he has no choice.
Okay, he has the choice of not asking at all and go to Cas directly, but - he isn’t sure. It’s already a miracle that they survived the almost-second-Apocalypse (and Dean will never not regret stopping Cas before he left the hospital), but Heaven is still as fragile as it goes and Raphael being gone doesn’t change that Cas’s position isn’t still cleared or stable. And he just doesn’t want to assume that the both of them would fly, not as he assumed a lot of stupid things during the last year
( ... )
Re: FILLED: I wear my love without shame (Dean/Cas, Balthazar), PG13, 2/?janie_tangerineJune 26 2011, 14:30:06 UTC
He thinks about it. He can’t go and propose, of course, because he can’t drag Cas into it until Balthazar gives him the stupid green light. Being nicer won’t cut it either - he already made enough efforts and being extra nice would just make everyone think there’s something wrong with him. Heck, he makes enough effort on a regular basis and he’s pretty sure that Cas will start exorcising him if Dean starts buying him flowers. Which doesn’t mean anything anyway - that’s not what proves that you’re serious. For the next month nothing changes as he still thinks about any gesture grand enough - when Cas drops by (and he drops by a lot more often) he listens to every rant he has about dealing with Raphael’s former followers, he doesn’t complain when Cas gets strawberry milkshakes at diners, he makes sure not to take anything for granted
( ... )
Re: FILLED: I wear my love without shame (Dean/Cas, Balthazar), PG13, 3/?janie_tangerineJune 26 2011, 14:32:07 UTC
Because then when I do it’ll be just memories in my stupid Heaven, he doesn’t say, and Balthazar doesn’t comment. He takes one of Cas’s hands and brings it just under Dean’s heart. Cas suddenly returns to his senses and tries to move it away
( ... )
Re: FILLED: I wear my love without shame (Dean/Cas, Balthazar), PG13, 4/4janie_tangerineJune 26 2011, 14:32:41 UTC
“See, this - you and me? I thought about it. A whole damn lot. I don’t tell you enough how much exactly you mean to me but that’s no mystery. But I think - I want us to be more than what we are right now
( ... )
Dean goes over it about fifteen times before realizing that he has no choice.
Okay, he has the choice of not asking at all and go to Cas directly, but - he isn’t sure. It’s already a miracle that they survived the almost-second-Apocalypse (and Dean will never not regret stopping Cas before he left the hospital), but Heaven is still as fragile as it goes and Raphael being gone doesn’t change that Cas’s position isn’t still cleared or stable. And he just doesn’t want to assume that the both of them would fly, not as he assumed a lot of stupid things during the last year ( ... )
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