(Untitled)

[blackplayground]

i'm lucky. i haven't been the victim of sexual abuse/violence. the fact that so many have enrages me. 1 in 5 women will experience sexual violence. 1 in 3 physical violence. walking down the street in mid-afternoon men in cars will yell out to me. every week i have at least five men yell something crude or, preferably, undecipherable out their car

Comments

[grace_julia]

while i agree that males yell out of car windows is annoying, sexist, insulting, demeaning, rude, unnessesary, and often hurtful - as a victim of abuse, i don't think that i consider that sort of action "sexual violence". while it is certainly awful to experience and often humiliating, if we were to turn to the law about a petty boy screaming out of a car window, we would likely detract from the more serious sexual issues at hand, such as rape and assault. i think that a lot of "feminazis" have affected the chances of many victims of sexual crimes, because nowadays (or i've found, anyway) people mis-use the terms sexual violence or assault. i think that wolf-whistling and rude behaviour is awful, but i just think that addressing petty issues such as these may have caused rape to be taken less seriously. i mean... drink spiking used to be a huge, scary and very real thing. then so many girls called "my drink has been spiked" and now it's seen as trivial, when in reality it's very dangerous for those who actually HAVE had their drinks

[blackplayground]

don't be sorry for rambling, but i do think you should re-examine your views. not in that they are wrong but rather.... i'll try and be delicate and i don't want to seem as though i am... attacking or undermining your experiences, particularly those as a victim of abuse. but i do disagree with... where you are coming from

[blackplayground]

i agree that people who boy-who-cried-wolf about things demean the reality of those events. but although people talk about 'all those women who accuse falsely' i haven't seen much evidence of this actually happening. further there is the fact that (as noted below) sexual assault can be difficult to prove, not because it didn't happen but because evidence is difficult to come by. this leads to a large majority of cases not going to trial or the perpetrator not being brought to justice. this certainly doesn't mean that the events didn't happen as the victim has claimed they did. i understand that you've experienced someone lying in this type of situation but... as the article pointed out a large number of women who have experience some kind of violence don't come forward and don't report it. those unnamed masses far outweigh the rather small amount of women who lie.

i'd also like to add that in this specific instance it is women we are speaking of. but that in many, many, many other instances there are men and women who lie in legal

[visualsounds]

I get cat calls all the time too and I HATE IT. And you're right, it's sooooo frustrating that there's no one I can turn to for this. I shouldn't have to just accept this, and this definitely shouldn't be the standard.

[blackplayground]

yes!

[blackplayground]

i agree with you about mayella and 1930's. i think i was just frustrated and had only just finished the book an hour before and used that as a very lopsided way to present my article. yet i think that if a woman with.... better social standing than mayella had accused someone of rape it would have been taken seriously. however the social repercussions for that woman would have been easily enough to convince her to not mention it. to anyone. ever.

i agree very much with all you've said. i've been really impressed over the last few months with the stance you have been taking and the action and organisation you've been involved in concerning womens issues. you should be really proud of yourself and always know there are many, many, many people here to support you and stand up with you.

thanks for th links.