My latest effort to pull out of the "everything I touch turns to crap" mode that I've been in for the last several weeks is to try some more sestinas without worrying about how tight or original they are. It seems to be working. The one I started last night about John Sheppard has stalled halfway through, but here's another I managed to write today
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Now if I could learn a thing or two from you on how to create such a strong, affecting mood by relying on atmosphere over plot....
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Crit: It took me a closer reading to get that 'Enzyme crash' was part of the one phrase for some reason - the last transition worked much better once I realized that. That one's probably just me, though, and I don't really have a suggestion, since you obviously did make an effort to make that clear. Also, you've got 'Elizbeth' in there somewhere :)
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The "Enzyme / crash" doesn't sit quite right with me, either. It's better than what was there before, but it could be better. Will ponder.
Thanks for reading! Glad to know it came across all right for someone unfamiliar with the episode.
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they're going to die
of unnatural old age
has the most beautiful mouth-feel. That might be a word I made up, but with any luck you can get the gist?
I haven't poked around in watf-drafts lately. Have you written any more over there?
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That might be a word I made up,
Hee, I do know what you mean, and thank you.
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What I am trying to say is thanks. :)
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